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* Posts by FanMan

157 posts • joined 24 Sep 2010

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Android in FOUR out of 5 new smartphones. How d'ya like dem Apples?

FanMan

That and a prominent name or logo...

and great quality and ease-of use

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FanMan

Re: Easy fix for Apple

Starting to make phones surely made them a follower from the get go?

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FanMan

Apple Phablet

I wish they would make a Big MacPhone, I'd buy one. I can't see the small writings so good no more.

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Z30: The classiest BlackBerry mobe ever ... and possibly the last

FanMan

Nonsense.

My iPhone 5 cost a lot more than that and I'm perfectly sane.

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Scottish leader splurged £20k appealing disclosure of EU membership legal bungle

FanMan
Linux

Showbiz for ugly people

Politics is legitimate "showbiz for ugly people" but the the odobenous Mr Salmond and his shrill sidekick Sturgeon are abusing the privilege. Do we really want them dominating our tellies and papers for years to come? It's a legitimate concern.

PS "Walrus" need not be a term of abuse necessarily. Sure the characteristic under-chin flotation sac appears to be present but if Mr Salmond is also equipped, walrus-like, with a sturdy baculum, then he is more to be envied than derided and it would help to explain his trademark smug demeanour.

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FanMan
Headmaster

"Sic" yourself

...to try and [sic] hide information that never even existed.

"To try and" is a perfectly respectable Scottish construction.

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Twitter spills unprofitable guts in $1bn IPO filing

FanMan

Re: @ Jack Clark

"Curt babble" is good. I like El Reg's wordsmithery. I have a feeling the perpetrators are Scottish, there is a national predilection for beating the fair Saxon tongue into strange new shapes.

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FanMan

Re: I doubt this will be much of a surprise to anyone

"You start by offering a free fix, move on to habituate your mark and once they're hooked, slowly start degrading the fix by introducing toxic substances that increase your profit margin. This is a proven mode"

Not so sure. I still use Google via Apple Mail because I can switch off almost all the ads. And now that Imstagram are going to start sending ads - well, it's been fun, but... Goodnight Vienna.

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Apple iOS 7 makes some users literally SICK. As in puking, not upset

FanMan
Facepalm

Come on Apple, restore the faith!

I'm one of those people who gets sick trying to read in a moving car. As a devoted Fan Man of seveal decades' standing I have to admit: the new GUI makes me want to boke.

Apple already know of this phenomenon, which is why there is an option on OSX to turn off dock icon magnification, which has the same nauseating effect. On me anyway.

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'Wacky' Spanish VoD squad launches people-picked online vid service in UK

FanMan

Que?

Estoy haciendo un curso de español intensivo y cuando se menciona "equipo español" salté a bordo. Pero todo es sólo el material anglo-americana de costumbre, como todo los otros....no una banda sonora española a la vista.

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BlackBerry BLOODBATH! Company warns of nearly $1bn quarterly loss

FanMan
WTF?

Don't knock the Kanucks

Canada survived the recession much better than we did. We have imported their top talent to run our bank better than we can. They're wonderful people, apart from Torontonians. They have a wonderful country. We should be so lucky!

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One year to go: Can Scotland really declare gov IT independence?

FanMan

The ensuing ruination is what brought us staggering hauf deid into the Union in the first place. As well you know, my lad.

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FanMan
Happy

Relax.

Independence isn't going to happen.

(Signed) A. Scot

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Dyson takes Samsung to court in UK over vacuum cleaner

FanMan

Mine's a Miele

29 year old drag-around, never missed a beat!

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Wrist SLAP: Samsung Galaxy Gear smartwatch hands-on

FanMan

I've got a smart enough watch, thanks.. it's 12.59.

Quote from Mashable: "Jeff Orr, a mobile industry analyst with ABI Research, estimates that there will be 1.2 million smart watch shipments worldwide this year, 7 million in 2014 and 140 million in 2018. That growth, he says, is based on the assumption that three or more big players enter the space and drive consumers to adopt the device."

They won't drive me. This piece of junk has flop written all over it.

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It's the software, stupid: Samsung Galaxy Gear smartwatch bags big apps

FanMan

Who cares

I hope Samsung and Apple have their market figured out. I don't know anyone, myself included, who has the faintest interest in owning a smartwatch.

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LinkedIn looks at bank account, thinks: We'll raise one Instagram*

FanMan
Boffin

Re: Genuine Question

I like it. In my work area (civil engineering) people get employed project to project and keep moving. This is a great way to keep in touch. The trick is to keep your contact list clean: don't admit, or quietly drop, anyone outside your professional circles.

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Samsung Mega 6.3: Enter the PHONDLESLAB

FanMan

Bring on the iHunk

I'm Apple to the core (see what I did there?) so no interest in current slabbery but if Cupertino came out with one I'd buy it like a shot. Extra screen space is always good. I don't give a rat's a**e what people think.

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Barnes & Noble booked for running out of £29 Nooks

FanMan

Re: Surely Fire Sales Are Always Limited?

Absolutely

We shouldn't be wasting our hard earned tax wonga on this nonsense.

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Sad shop-shelf-clinging BlackBerry Z10 AXED ... in price, contracts

FanMan
Thumb Up

Wife + Q10

My beloved wife has retreated to her trusty BB9300 after a very disillusioning bout with the Q10. We had a 3 day marriage-stability-threatening wrassle with the horrors that are BB Desktop and BB Drive before finally managing to move her into the Q10. Although initially dazzled she grew to hate the thing and we've sent it all back. O2 support were pretty helpful but not that well versed and just prolonged the agony.

Incidentally: what triggered the upgrade was that the BB9300 trackpad died. I'm no technician but I got a new trackpad for £5 from Amazon and courtesy of a very useful Youtube how-to, installed it and to my utter astonishment (you have to take the phone completely apart) it works perfectly and Mrs F is now happily texting away. Result.

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Apple files patent for iPhone enabled auto-adjustable auto interior

FanMan

Go configure

This isn't an invention, it's a catch-all. I hope the American patent people throw it out. Enough already.

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Guinness: Have a quick bonk over the bar and receive FREE BEER

FanMan

To the Tavern!

Maybe fanbois don't drink Guinness but FanMen such as myself (circa. Mac SE/30) certainly do.

Or did, until I discovered the utterly magnificent Thwaites Tavern Porter, real stout in a bottle complete with yeasty secondary fermentation - modern Guinness of any format is one-dimensional in comparison with this profoundly satisfying and refreshing brew.

About £1.50 a pint in Makro and cheap at twice the price!

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Village-swallowing MUDCANO was no accident, say boffins

FanMan

Just saying

The word we seek is principal, a main participant, not principle, a fundamental proposition.

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Malware-flingers do it back-to-front : scaM snaps, spans Macs

FanMan

OK mes enfants

please forego the usual snidery and advise us poor benighted fanfolk how to react short of switching to mi ... mmmm mmkks... ... sorry I can not even say the m word without rising nausea but you know what I mean.

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Fitbit Flex wristband: What to wear out when wearing yourself out

FanMan

Fitbits are great. End of.

Whether you get the clip on or the wristband: this is the most fun, successful and effective fitness and weight control aid yet devised. If you're unfit or overweight - get one and use it - worth every penny.

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'The Apprentice' is a load of old codswallop, says biz prof

FanMan
Headmaster

Re: It's TV

At the age of 69½ it has become clear to me that life is w..a...aaa...y too short to waste a millisecond of it watching the antics of these boring losers

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Something's going on with Google Reader but nobody knows what

FanMan

who cares

It's an iGoogle replacement I'm worried about

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BlackBerry BB10 devices refuse to leap off shelves

FanMan
Happy

what we need

is an iphone with a blackberry keyboard

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Sony set to launch smartwatch in Shanghai next week

FanMan
Pirate

Re: Oh...

Hmm.. The SG553 is indeed a formidable close range tool for urban environments.

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FanMan
Unhappy

Watch

My fancy schmancy new Seoko Kinetic just dumped 40 mins

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FanMan
Thumb Down

Not a good idea

It's the next step from whipping out your mobe to see what time it is and getting all caught up in all the stuff.

I've just gone back - after 5 years - to wearing a conventional analogue watch (a nice hefty kinetic powered SKA465P1). My fanmobe remains trousered much longer and I'm a calmer and cheerier person as a result.

A smartwatch will make a self absorbed twtching neurotic wreck of you.

You don't need it in your life. Resist.

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Intel doubles throughput, slashes power to stave off DATAPOCALYPSE

FanMan
Facepalm

Re: DATAPOCALYPSE

Sorry, it's not helping.

Dappyclippalips. Dottacapalist. Cataplasdopey. Decalsatopyaqp. Decoypapaplast.

G-G-GYURLS!!!! D-D DRINK!!!!

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FanMan
Megaphone

DATAPOCALYPSE

Kindly ask your Neological Dept to check that their creations are readily pronounceable before releasing them into the wild. Thanks.

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HP sacks English employees to bag Scots gov jobs cash

FanMan

Re: English Taxpayers

Oil and gas are declining and Scotch whisky is subject to volatile changes in consumer taste, and peanuts in global terms anyway. Get real. We Scors need to stay inside the tent.

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FanMan

Relax

It's not going to happen. The Scots (myself included) may be daft but they're not stooped.

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FanMan

So they'll "transition" them, eh?

Oh. You mean "move".

Well why the **** didn't you say so?

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Kinky? You're mentally healthier than 'vanilla' bonkers

FanMan
Thumb Up

Ripe

Ripe

Dr Wismeijer's findings seem ripe for a TV tie-up. Fewer calories than all that food porn.

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Phones for the elderly: Testers wanted for senior service

FanMan
WTF?

Una palabra

One word: iPhone

Congenially yours

Ian (69½)

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App gap flap: New York's e-cabbies FOILED AGAIN

FanMan

I've really enjoyed using Hailo in London: fare goes straight on to my CC, I have the cabbie's ID and mobile no., (great for women), I can sit and wait in comfort instead of dancing around on the kerb in the rain.

I probably take cabs more often with Hailo.

BUT - cabbies don't appear to be obliged to accept the Hailo offered jobs so at feeding-frenzy times and places you could wait a while.

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'Not only is James Bond fictional, he's not a fair representation of intelligence'

FanMan
Trollface

"The film version is almost incomprehensible"

Never mind the "almost".... but that's missing the point. The film was all about atmosphere and style. Brilliant.

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BlackBerry OS 10.1 leaks its secret goo over all the web

FanMan
Trollface

Mrs F....

...despite my entreaties is sticking with BB. I find the under-the-hood clunky non-intuitiveness of her phone and absolute pita every time she needs help with it, which is quite often, so I'm really hoping the Q10 she's holding out for will share iPhone's endearing set-up simplicity.

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PC floggers scavenge for crumbs as Apple hoovers up profits

FanMan
Facepalm

I'm a big, huge, feckin eejit..

... just about to haul my silly arse down to PC World, waltz blindly past all these beautiful Packard Dells and score a Mac Mini for £565.80 plus vat. I mean I've had 4 years to work out how crap my present Mini is and I'm off to score another one. Dumkopf or what!

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Get lost, drivers: Google Maps is not for you – US judge

FanMan
Thumb Up

"The primary evil sought to be avoided"

American English can be magnificent. Respect!

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Monkey poo probe reveals secrets of middle-management brains

FanMan
Facepalm

"Middle managers suffer more stress than anyone else"

No shit!

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Boss of Irish-based R&D hub: Man, this place is the back of beyond

FanMan
Trollface

watch out

You need to watch yourself at Cork airport. I once left a van in the long term car park there and flew back to the Yookay. Three months later I came back to find the van in the same spot, but the area it was in has been re-marked and fenced off as the hire car return park. Accordingly, the van was festooned with stickers, multiple clamped, relieved of a wiper and couple of hub caps, and I was told I'd have to pay 1250 punts to get it out. I talked my way out of it eventually but the whole experience was somewhat Kafkaesque.

But anyway Mr Savage should include a transit of the Kinsale Road Roundabout as part of the visitor experience - strange, perilous, unforgettable!

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BlackBerry results not as bad as they possibly could have been

FanMan
Thumb Up

Re: Z10 - Baby out with the bathwater.

I'm quietly confident my missus will love the upgrade from Curve to Q10 I'm going to get her as soon as they come on sale.

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FanMan
Mushroom

Chaotic mess

"One day they were a major technology company with assets to make any self respecting techno-conglomerate salivate. The next day they were a chaotic mess without a strategic vision and certainly no future."

Oops, that was Time Magazine reporting on Apple in 1996, sorry!

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