Feeds

* Posts by _RCH_

353 posts • joined 22 Sep 2010

Page:

EU Competition chief: So what if I didn't tame Google? You're all 'irrational' anyway

_RCH_
Bronze badge

"Almunia’s office had amassed a mountain of evidence on the Californian data-processing giant, but Almunia declined to launch a formal investigation, preferring to cut a back room deal. Almunia and Google chairman Eric Schmidt had kept in close contact via text message, but the former Spanish trade union economist has declined attempts to reveal what they discussed."

Nothing to see here! Hey, look at that!

1
2

Apple's new iPADS have begun the WAR that will OVERTURN the NETWORK WORLD

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Big Brother

Inevitable Convergence

The news has, in the last few days, mentioned a SIM card you can't swap out and a phone that listens for 'Ok Google Now' even when 'turned off'.

Nothing much better for a surveillance-obsessed world system than people carrying phones that are always connected, always listening and can't be turned off.

2
0
_RCH_
Bronze badge
Black Helicopters

I, for one, welcome our new confectionary-based overlord....

Actually, no, I don't.

1
0

Data cops in charge of Facebook, LinkedIn, Google get a new office

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I bet the 'Convenience Store' has a special combination of buttons on the cash register which will flip the shop counter upside down, revealing a shiny rail-based transporter which will carry up to three people to a secret underground lair where Stan Smith and Patrick Stewart work to protect the world from evil.

0
0

iPhone 6 shunned by fanbois in Apple's GREAT FAIL of CHINA

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I wouldn't touch an iPhone with a dead cat's tail on the end of a boat-sized red-hot poker, I think they suck the big one.... but..... wouldn't most smartphone manufacturers give their back teeth to have 100 people queuing outside of any shop at the launch of any of their products?

6
4

Will.i.am gets CUFFED as he announces his new wristjob, the PULS

_RCH_
Bronze badge

You can get this kind of thing from Chinavasion for very few pennies.

0
0

Martha Lane Fox: YEUCH! The Internet is MADE by MEN?!?

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Yellow Man-Water

"that something that is now fundamental, like the water, for everybody’s daily life has been entirely produced by men"

It's like those urinals in McDonalds that say they save something like 100,000 litres of drinking water a year. Yeuch (or, as we say in Wales, ych-a-fi)!

0
0

Son of Hudl: Tesco flogs new Atom-powered 8.3-inch Android tablet

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Re: "The microSD slot at the bottom is open to the elements."

From where can I get one,

Dear @Handle, dear @Handle?

From where can I get one,

Dear @Handle, from where?

12
0

Xiaomi boss snaps back at Jony Ive's iPhone rival 'theft' swipe

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Arghhhhhhh!

I hate typing the name of this Apple designer, not because I hate him or anything like that, but my muscle-memory keeps typing I've and I have to go back and delete that damn apostrophe.

2
1

Red Bull does NOT give you wings, $13.5m lawsuit says so

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I Was Robbed As a Child

I was robbed as a kid by Mars who promised me that a Mars a day helped me to work, rest and play.

Call my lawyers!

2
0

Gates and Ballmer NOT ON SPEAKING TERMS – report

_RCH_
Bronze badge

B&B

"where he advises Nadella on technology matters"

Is it me or does that sound menacing?

Anyway, this whole thing smells to me of Tony Blair and Gordon Brown; I still think that Ballmer is essentially a nice guy (as far as a sales executive can be nice) if more than slightly clumsy and that Gates is a slimy, manipulative weasel. Yup, I'm still thinking Blair and Brown.

14
1

Nokia Lumia 735: Ignore the selfie hype, it's a grown-up phone

_RCH_
Bronze badge

@AndrewOrlowski, I've found that when the bottom navigation bar is missing, swiping up from the bottom of the screen brings it up.

1
1

Windows 10's 'built-in keylogger'? Ha ha, says Microsoft – no, it just monitors your typing

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Re: That means Trevor Pott was right

I've not installed Windows 10 for obvious reasons, but from what I read on Lifehacker, the relevant bits weren't buried in the EULA but were seen in a separate set of Privacy Statements.

I also know that if I had installed Windows 10 at work and my boss found out that there was a privacy statement available and that I hadn't read it and that because of this I was potentially leaking confidential information, I'd at risk of being choped.

(this is what I read --> http://www.lifehacker.co.uk/2014/10/07/windows-10s-keylogger-fiasco-blown-proportion )

4
0
_RCH_
Bronze badge

Re: Microsoft simply cannot afford this to happen

I've not done programming for a very long time, but I know that when I did, and I was trying to fix bugs, I was putting all sorts of error trapping and logging all over the place just so I could see exactly what is going on in there.

All Microsoft is doing here is inviting people to join in that testing.

The word 'beta' has been misused over time and people assume it means "Pretty much a finished and perfect product, we just don't want to take any flack if anything goes wrong".

Anyone downloading Windows 10 (and I'm not one of them) needs to know that it will be faulty, Microsoft knows it will be faulty and so they need to have things in place to monitor the faults.

By all means rip them a second bum-hole if Windows 10 does this post release, but expecting Microsoft to be able to fix bugs from simple emails saying "It doesn't work" means Windows 10 won't be ready until Clinton has finished her second term in office.

6
3
_RCH_
Bronze badge

Considering the kind of bug reports Microsoft would likely get, such as "I clicked on an icon and then I typed and it went blank until I pressed the button and then it went white and back to normal", Microsoft is going to need the extra telemetry to understand what actually happened.

As long as its not in the final version.

9
1

Linux systemd dev says open source is 'SICK', kernel community 'awful'

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Olivetti and Time Travel

Many years ago, I had an Olivetti laptop which I liked to potch about with. I tried Linux and it was Ok, then I tried Windows which was I used for a while but then I decided to get back to Linux. However, for the life of me, I couldn't get the blasted sound card to work. I was certain I'd managed to get the sound card to work before, so I went on the interwebs to find out how to do it.

After much searching (I think I used AltaVista back then), I found perfect instructions for my model laptop. Exactly what I wanted. I worked down the page and before I could say Dr. Sbaitso, it was working.

I decided to thank the person who wrote the document and scrolled right to the end for their email address.... I found it and it was none other than..... me!

I still can't remember writing that doc and I sometimes wonder if a future me is yet to go into the past and write it for me.

I don't use Linux now for a number of reasons. The hostile community isn't the dealbreaker for me, but it is a factor.

8
0

Doctor Who becomes an illogical, unscientific, silly soap opera in Kill The Moon

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Is Capaldi going the way of Colin Baker? I hope not, I generally like this different character, even though every seagull I see reminds me of him.

0
0

Apple sues Steven Lamar over Beats co-founder claims

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Re: "Beats also wants treble damages..."

"Since when did Beats know anything about treble?"

If that doesn't make Comment of the Week, *I'm going to run naked through the next Reg meetup!

* This statement may contain false promises

9
0

Spammer uses innocent hacked blogs to punt NAKED PICS of JLaw, McKayla Maroney

_RCH_
Bronze badge

We've had news of terrorists too terrifying for Al Qaida and now internet filth to dirty for 4Chan!? Whatever next!? Priests too catholic for the Pope?

7
0
_RCH_
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: Which is worse ?

"The silly wanker..."

I think that in today's parlance, that should be "The silly fapper..."

;)

1
0

Cut-off North Sea island: Oh crap, ferry's been and gone. Need milk. SUMMON THE DRONE

_RCH_
Bronze badge

This could help rid the streets of couriers. Just think of the business opportunities opened up to fat kids with Xbox controllers if this could be gamified.

1
0

iPhone 6: Advanced features? Pah! Nexus 4 had most of them in 2012

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I bet Jennifer Lawrence can't wait to start using her iPhone to pay for kinky toys. Secure purchases are great and knowing that nobody will ever be able to know what you buy must giver her a great sense of security.

2
0

Blockbuster book lays out the first 20 years of the Smartphone Wars

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Great article.

"This makes the achievement of Sendo - a small British manufacturer that cranked out two Symbian phones - all the more noteable" -- We often forget how Microsoft and HTC royally shafted this little player)

1
0

New 'Cosmos' browser surfs the net by TXT alone

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I remember way back in the days of the Nokia 7650, writers on PocketPCThoughts wrote that Symbian phones browsed the web via SMS, sending and receiving thousands of text messages to show a web page. I knew that wasn't the case but did wonder if it could possibly work.

0
0

Video: Dyson unveils ROBOTIC TANK that hoovers while you're out

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Fruitless?

Dyson is surely the Apple of home appliances..... and I don't intend that as a compliment.

32
11

Good luck with Project Wing, Google. This drone moonshot is NEVER going to happen

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Happy

Hurrah for the human pilots

"No? Like hundreds of them doing a really, really boring job? Thought not. So these are self-guided drones."

I wouldn't mind doing that for a while, heck, I almost do it anyway from time to time on Google Earth.

2
0

Cave scrawls prove Neanderthals were AT LEAST as talented as modern artists

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I know what it is...

It's a prehistoric Hashtag, the first recorded hashtag in history!

#mammothmeatrocks anyone?

6
0

Facebook, Google and Instagram 'worse than drugs' says Miley Cyrus

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Hmmmmm, young girls following her online may be damaging to their grey matter, but those young girls following her in her destructive drug abuse is something else.

At least she'll be able to afford rehab when she hits rock bottom, but those of today's children who will follow her into the fantastic dismay that seems so wonderful right now may not be so lucky and may have to seek the help of a friendly neighbourhood pimp to keep them going.

I know this is sweeping and there are people who can use recreational drugs in a 'responsible' way, but the price of celebrity isn't always paid by the celebrity and there are lives led into tragedy while the celebrity makes headlines with every step.

2
0

Nokia: Read these Maps, Samsung – we're HERE for the Gear

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Before I start: I have a Windows Phone (a few actually) and love it (them)

HERE is rubbish for navigation when driving. It drains my phone's battery even when the maps are offline and the phone is on charge with a proper car phone charger. I find that to be really quite frustrating.

1
0

Ofcom will not probe lesbian lizard snog in new Dr Who series

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: Did the BBC just troll people?

Everyone I know calls the comms lady from Star Trek Uhuru but I'm sure it's Uhura.

As long as you don't call the pointy eared one Doctor Spock, we'll be Ok

;)

8
0

Apple tried to get a ban on Galaxy, judge said: NO, NO, NO

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Apple wants to ban Galaxy phones because Galaxy phones have got really (some might say stupidly)big screens and Apple is yet to show the world how it invented really (Apple used to say stupidly) big screens on a phone with the iPhone 6.

Be fair, how can Apple be expected to innovate when people keep doing stuff first?

9
2

Huawei: 'Tizen has no chance', Windows Phone is 'difficult'... it's Android all the way

_RCH_
Bronze badge

The few Windows Phones that have been sold aren't Huawei, probably, because they didn't advertise them and they were only available in the bargain section of unrefurbished Asda stores.

It's like Mad Mike's Mobile Manufacturing Emporium saying that nobody is buying its Android phones when nobody knew that Mad Mike's Mobile Manufacturing Emporium made Android mobile phones.

2
2

Will It Blend? Maybe. BlackBerry’s secret comeback weapon

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Terminator

When I saw that Blackberry Blend screenshot I felt an emotional tug at my heartstrings but didn't recognise it until you mentioned Nokia's Lifeblog software.

Oh, they were the days. Can't go back now though.

0
0

6 Obvious Reasons Why Facebook Will Ban This Article (Thank God)

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Joke

Upvote this comment and see why how Sylvester Stallone survived the car crash that never happened

10
0

Jarvis versus Jarvis: Don't DISRUPT the DISRUPTION GURU!

_RCH_
Bronze badge

"and boasts over 140,000 Twitter followers"

That isn't *that* much even for somebody in the tech limelight these days, is it?

It's 140,000 more than me though... Maybe because I don't have one. I bet if I did, I'd be well popular like.

2
0

Primetime precrime? Minority Report TV series 'being developed'

_RCH_
Bronze badge

"Minority Report TV series 'being developed'

That'll be the news in a few years time then.

1
0

Microsoft ropes in Opera Mini as default Nokia dumbphone browser

_RCH_
Bronze badge

As a very happy Windows Phone user, I feel sad to see Microsoft with no direction in the mobile markets...

0
0

Speaking in Tech: Meet the man who SURRENDERED to Facebook

_RCH_
Bronze badge

So what does the guy say at the start? Is it Shoobiedoobiedooba?

0
0

Cops baffled by riddle of CHICKEN who crossed ROAD

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Coat

Police wouldn't be happy

I reckon if I saw this and called the police, they'd suspect foul play.

8
0

Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Re: No detracting from the evidence but.............

I read somewhere that Microsoft, on Windows Phone 8, ranks the popularity of apps in the store not only by downloads but also by how often they're executed and whether or not they're pinned onto the start screen.

I'm sure that if Microsoft has the tech to do that, so do the others.

2
0

EE rolls out London bus pay-by-bonk app – only fandoids need apply

_RCH_
Bronze badge

"iPhone-toting customers just don't have the power"

Don't iPhone users prefer to drive their Citreon CVs into town anyway?

2
0

REGULAR FISTING is GOOD for your HEALTH, says respected surveyor

_RCH_
Bronze badge

I prefer a good handshake -- gives you a measure of the person's enthusiasm.

2
0

Google outlines research priorities for boffin grants

_RCH_
Bronze badge

\O/ Freedom \O/

"The Chocolate Factory still ranks freedom of speech and expression"

Just don't ask it to acknowledge the existence of your website if you say something it doesn't like.

0
0

DAYS from end of life as we know it: Boffins tell of solar storm near-miss

_RCH_
Bronze badge

We just have to get to Iapetus, reactivate the darned thing and, bing-bong boom-shakalaka, we have a Death Star. Job done.

0
0

Russia sends SEX-CRAZED GECKOS to SPAAAAACE!

_RCH_
Bronze badge

They're going to start a new lizard-based civilisation on a far and distant planet. However, after some time, a group of them (led by The lizard Hon Rubbard) will start a belief system that insists some of them are secretly mammals living in Lizard Skin.

That's what will happen, and watch out when Com Truise, a famous all-action Lizard decides to take on the universe.

9
0

Super Cali optimistic cloud is now a focus – even though the sound of it is something quite

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Pint

Headline

'Nuff said

1
0

It's Google HQ - the British one: Reg man snaps covert shots INSIDE London offices

_RCH_
Bronze badge

Did they show you the room that contains the souls of all the grandmothers that have been sold to Google in order to obtain 'free' services?

4
3

Hacker claims breach of Wall Street Journal and Vice websites, punts 'user data' for sale

_RCH_
Bronze badge
Gimp

Choice of Apps?

He uses Apple's Numbers? What's wrong with the jabroni?

1
0

Apple orders huge MOUNTAIN of 80 MILLION 'Air' iPhone 6s

_RCH_
Bronze badge

"Incredibly hard, long bulges in fanboi pockets this year"

You probably think that's funny don't you?

;)

1
1

New Star Wars movie plot details leak, violate common sense and laws of physics

_RCH_
Bronze badge

".. The hand ends up on a desert planet where it is eventually discovered by the characters played by Daisy Ridley and John Boyega, the latter of whom is a renegade Stormtrooper."

I have a bad feeling about this.

10
0

Page: