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* Posts by Loyal Commenter

1745 posts • joined 20 Jul 2010

BOFH: The current value of our IT ASSets? Minus eleventy-seven...

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Pint

Re: Sharon T. Pokeworthy...

A fine ale, but not quite so good since they switched to using pelleted hops five or six years ago...

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Re: This is actually true...

In a previous incarnation, I used to sign job sign-off forms as Mickey Mouse. Things for print-runs of between 50 and 150k...

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True fact: 1 in 4 Brits are now TERRORISTS

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Re: ISIS

Concentration camps were (IIRC) first used by the Spaniards in their colonial wars in the Caribbean.

Concentration camps, in terms of rounding a group of people up and putting them in one place, have been used throughout recorded history by pretty much everyone. The term Concentration Camp was coined by the British Empire during its escapades in Africa during the late nineteenth / early twentieth century. The Spanish camps in Cuba prior to this were used under 'Reconcentrado' policy, which probably contributed to the coining of this term, but these were not referred to specifically as 'concentration camps'.

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Re: ISIS

What has the Geneva convention got to do with anything. Are you one of these idiots who thinks we should no longer afford our citizens basic human rights 'because terrorists', and then brand every criminal in the country as a terrorist to suit our needs?

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Microsoft refuses to nip 'Windows 9' unzip lip slip

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Re: Complete this series...

Everything Microsoft makes these days is substandard crap.

I've actually grown to rather like Win7, and VS 2012 is nice once you turn off monochrome mode and change the registry to stop all the menus shouting at you.

Don't get me started on Orifice Office and its numerous iterations of confusing and contradictory UIs though...

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Re: Apple's Yawn and Windows Apology

Sorry but Apple is not a football team.

No, it's a cult.

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Complete this series...

Windows 3.1 good

Windows 95 bad

Windows 98 good

Windows ME bad

Windows XP good

Windows Vista bad

Windows 7 good

Windows 8 bad

Windows 9 ...

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Vampires and Ninjas versus the Alien Jedi Robot Pirates: It's ON

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Re: Robots hive mind for the win.

One mind = one target, so without any redundancy it's a terrible idea. Also without variation or autonomy, there's no adaptability.

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: Hmmmmmmmmmmmm

Godzilla!

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Loyal Commenter
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Ninjas are in

But are limited to their role in Kabuki theatre...

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Assange™: Hey world, I'M STILL HERE, ignore that Snowden guy

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Re: Well my cousin will be happy

Don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting that incidents of police brutality and corruption don't happen. The Menezes and Tomlinson cases are shocking and a sad reflection on the forces involved. It is worth noting that the officers involved in these were a) a special 'anti-terror' firearms unit, and b) riot police. both are far from the rank-and-file of the vast majority of police employees.

I won't argue for a second that what the police did in either of these cases was right, and that the cover-ups that followed were not a disgusting indictment of the Met. One would hope that the lessons learned have been applied and that this sort of thing is less likely to happen in future. I'm not naive enough to think that a problem does not exist.

However, extrapolating this behaviour to all members of the police, across the entire country, is grossly unfair to the vast number of honest, hard working officers.

The introduction of body-cams is a good thing in that it records both the conduct of the officer, and the public towards them. If an officer decides to get over-zealous with his truncheon and he is wearing a body-cam, he'll have a hard time denying it. Conversely, if he has to deal with a violent drunk who attacks him with a broken bottle, and later claims he was assaulted by the police, the evidence is there to show what actually happened. I would hope that the correct oversight is taken in storing and retaining such evidence, as it goes a long way to restoring public trust in policing, which on the whole, in this country is very fair and even-handed. I would also hope that it manages to root out the bad apples in the barrel, and when tragedies such as Menezes do happen, provides evidence as to who was ultimately responsible.

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Re: He needs the attention, but still...

watching the Cliff Richard thing play out without an ability of the accused to defend themselves

I'm not sure how you think the CR thing is playing out, but as far as I am aware, his main complaint was that he was not forewarned that the police would be raiding his home. Forgive me for my naivete, but I was not under the impression that it was common practice for the police to forewarn suspects. Something to do with destroying evidence. The South Yorkshire police have also been very explicit in stating that the BBC contacted them, because they had been tipped off by a third party, rather than the other way round. It seems like the current attitude of the police is to NOT tip the press off in cases of investigations into celebrities, and everything the police have done in this case seems above board to me.

The identity of the third party that tipped the press off has not been revealed AFAIK, but it could be any one of a number of people, from an alleged victim, to their friends, or relatives, to someone bugging a police station - any guess is just that - pure speculation. We have been told that it was not the police, and we have no reason, other than suspicious minds, to question that.

CR has also been given the freedom to make public statements (which he has done). As a multi-millionaire, it's not as if he doesn't have the resources to defend himself. The cynical might suggest that the timing of the raid (when he is out of the country) is precisely because of the resources that CR may have at his disposal to make things turn out in his favour (rightly, or otherwise).

Lets let any evidence come to light, and the police investigation complete before we jump to any conclusions. Unless you are directly involved in the police investigation (are are the accused, or alleged victim), you are not in full possession of the pertinent facts to make any sort of judgement.

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: Well my cousin will be happy

It might be worth your pondering the fact that due to oversight, and regulations, the vast majority of the police (in this country at least) are almost guaranteed to be less corrupt than members of whatever profession you are engaged in.

Whilst police work might nominally attract a certain personality type that likes to beat up on hippies in bean fields, the vast majority of officers are over-worked, underpaid and far too busy buried under piles of paperwork to be kyboshing anyone with their batons, and if they did, they would have to explain the footage from their bodycam to their superiors, or face some very tricky questions about why it was turned off.

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@ Ross K

With all your self-focused commenting, I suggest that you are, in fact, Julian Assange, AICMFP!

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Tor-rorists get sneaky Aphex Twin album peek in dance guru hypegasm

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Re: In my day

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9xMuPWAZW8

Fast-forward to the bit 5:30 in.

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You'll find Yoda at the back of every IT conference

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I'm not normally one to stand up for Sting

But if you had a story, told by a summoner, and added nine more, told by the same incantator, the sum of those would be ten summoner's tales. The error is not in the syntax but the parser...

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NASA's rock'n'roll shock: ROLLING STONE FOUND ON MARS

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Coat

I'm disappointed by the limited number fo puns in this article.

But then, you can't always get what you want.

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Murder accused DIDN'T ask Siri 'how to hide my roommate'

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Re: I'm more impressed

3. Pull out the battery (if it's not removable you're fucked) so that it "loses coverage" without performing a proper sign-off.

If the battery is not removable, place the phone inside a microwave oven (switched off), or other faraday cage, to force loss of connection to the network. If microwaves at 850W can't get out, the couple of watts your phone puts out won't either.

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Ancient pager tech SMS: It works, it's fab, but wow, get a load of that incoming SPAM

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Re: Can you turn it off?

Good for you. Personally, I avoid using email on a mobile device where the data connectivity may be poor or non-existent, where a quick and easy alternative (which doesn't use any of the data allowance) is available.

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I recall reading somewhere that SMS messages get sent as part of the network synchronisation messages that keep your phone connected to the nearest base station. As such, there is no additional cost to the network for sending and receiving them, only in carrying them across the network, and passing them on to other networks. The cost to the telco of carrying the messages, as opposed to not carrying them, using the infrastructure which is already there, is as close to zero as to not matter.

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Re: The biggest challenge ...

If your boss is sending you text messages whilst you are on holiday (or, by extension, in the evenings, at weekends, at any time where you are not being paid to be at work), it is he that deserves the bollocking. I would be explaining to him in no uncertain terms that you are paid to work specific hours, and outside those hours, he should not be contacting you with work-related matters.

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Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE

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Re: If you ask for soya 'milk'

I'm not trying to claim that there aren't any number of ingenious uses for soya beans, particularly in the Orient, from eating them boiled in their pods, to fermenting them to make sauces and miso, and processing to make tofu (evil though it is).

Soya 'milk', however, would not historically have been used in China as a whitener for coffee - it's not only anachronistic, but geographically unlikely.

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Unhappy

Re: Scarcely relevant musing

oddly I've never heard of anyone spreading "pah-tay" on toast.

Sadly, I have.

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If you ask for soya 'milk'

You deserve everything you get. Just ask yourself what process is used to turn a bright green bean into a white semi-opaque imitation of a cow's mammary excretions.

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London cops cuff 20-year-old man for unblocking blocked websites

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Re: Jolly good work.

Would you be impressed if your boss told you to turn up tomorrow but he/she had no intention of paying you anyway?

I work as a programmer. I expect to be paid by my employer to turn up to work, but I certainly don't expect to be paid every time one of our users runs a piece of code I've written.

By all means, performers should be paid to perform, but people shouldn't have to pay the same price you would pay to go to a concert and see a performer live just to listen to a pre-recorded version of their performance.

Also, you are conveniently ignoring the fact that many people download things to watch/listen to them and decide if they like it, before actually buying it, so increasing sales. I know I have certainly bought things that I otherwise would not have, after downloading them first.

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UK.gov eyes up virtual currencies, fingers red tape dispenser

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Re: The problems with bitcoin, as seen by governments

With mining power concentrated in such a small number of actors all liable to the jurisdiction or pressure of the USA, that's a feasible prospect.

That's not entirely true. Slush's pool, for example, is hosted in the Czech Republic. I don't believe that they are closely linked with the US.

Admittedly, they are now down to being the 11th largest pool, but still...

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Loyal Commenter
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This is probably a good thing, from the perspective of Bitcoin users

The problem at the moment, which prevents wider adoption of cryptocurrencies, ironically, is the lack of regulation.

I'm talk, of course, about regulation of the Bitcoin equivalents of banks and exchanges, the lack of which pretty much led to the downfall of MtGox, and the crash in price of BTC earlier in the year. If MtGox had been regulated, and forced to provide proper accounting of deposits and withdrawals, then there would have been little scope for funds to go missing.

Of course, MtGox was not a British company, so regulations here would not have affected it, but a proper regulatory framework here would allow British businesses to perform the functions of exchanges. If it becomes less of a risky investment for companies to open exchanges, then it becomes easier for Joe Bloggs to exchange fiat for BTC (and vice versa), leading to both a boost in the value of cryptocurrencies (their value being a measure of their utility as a payment processing mechanism), and the UK economy.

Really, the UK gov should be thinking about regulation as soon as possible, because as soon as one nation gets it right, they will become the de-facto 'exit point' for fiat<->BTC transactions, and we don't want the Merkins getting there before us...

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SCORE: Rosetta probe hits orbit of duck-shaped comet

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Re: Very impressive re. semantics

As long as you don't include the depressing sequels...

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Loyal Commenter
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Very impressive

But I do have to take issue with the statement “Europe’s Rosetta is now the first spacecraft in history to rendezvous with a comet, a major highlight in exploring our origins. Discoveries can start.”, as they seem to have completely forgotten about NASA's Deep Impact and Stardust missions, which impacted with, and returned cometary samples from comet Tempel-1.

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African samba queen: Don't cut off pirates' net connections – cut off their FINGERS

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Mushroom

All crime is committed by the living!

The criiime isss liiife. The punissshment isss death!

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Facebook goes down, people dial 911

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Just remember...

The average person on the street is an idiot. And by definition, half the population is stupider.

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Scotland's BIG question: Will independence cost me my broadband?

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Re: I hope they do leave and learn hard reality.

Cameron's a Scottish name, right? If Scotland votes 'yes', I reckon we should send him back there. They can do whatever they like with the bastard.

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Re: Promises

"Now where's the equivalent UK vote on whether we'd like Scotland to stay or go? It's not all about Scotland..."

If a girlfriend dumps you do you demand a right of veto?

If a girlfriend repeatedly threatens to dump you but never goes through with it, she'd be naive to think you'd not ditch her for someone less neurotic...

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: You must be joking

"BBC Radio Scotland is full of tossers who blether on about uninteresting crap."

You really didn't need to qualify that with 'BBC Radio'.

...or 'Scotland'

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: Realism

However, the UK does have historical form for that, just ask any one of a number of ex-colonial countries.

Whilst I can't deny that the British Empire did a lot of rather naughty things, most of these were beyond living memory, and it's not as if everyone else on the planet is saintly. History is, after all, written by the winners, and everyone alive today is alive because their ancestors, in a long line going back to time immemorial, fought and killed others for the resources to survive and propagate.

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Running the Gauntlet: Atari's classic ... now and then

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Re: Wall Exits

IIRC, it was five minutes and all the doors opened (not necessarily a good thing if you'd run out of keys and there's a generator on the other side, or worse, deaths trapped behind doors), and then another five minutes and all the walls turned to exits.

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Loyal Commenter
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The remake looks suspiciously like a Diablo III clone... Not that that's a bad game, after the rebalancing and DLC, but why make the same game?

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Loyal Commenter
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I seem to remember turning the tape over somewhere around level 50, and then getting to level 100 only to be told to turn the tape back over again. Can't remember how far I got before the dreaded read error happened, I think it was somewhere around 120. Amazing to think that this was on a computer with 48k of usable memory (the other 16k was taken up by the graphics memory) and a processor clocked at 2 MHz!

I remember playing Gauntlet II on the old CPC464 too, the do'h! moment of stunning yourself with a reflecting shot...

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Amazon France routes around free shipping ban with €0.01 charge

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Facepalm

Re: And that's cuttin' me own throat!

Its exactly the same thing, but with cars instead of books. It's restricting free market pricing.

Sigh... No it isn't the same thing.

In the first case, it is comparing A priced at €x with A priced at €y - the item being sold is the same thing

In your example, it is comparing A priced at €x with B priced at €y - the item being sold is something completely different

To take your (already stretched) car analogy, lets use a fruit-and-veg analogy:

Greengrocer A sells apples at £1 a pound (he doesn't care that the EU says he has to sell them in kilos). Greengrocer B sells his apples at 1 penny a pound, absorbing the loss, to try to drive greengrocer A out of business, and then when he is the only player left in the market, he can charge whatever he likes for apples.

However, if greengrocer A was selling apples at £1 a pound, it has no bearing whatsoever on what greengrocer B can charge for German cars.

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: And that's cuttin' me own throat!

Many of the larger book shops (E.g. Thalia, Hugendubel) have reading corners, where you can just wander in, pick up a book and sit and read the book, drink a cup of coffee, then leave again. You don't have to buy the book.

I'm willing to bet you that their profit on that cup of coffee (probably priced at around €4, with a margin of around €3.90) is far larger than the profit they would have made if they had sold the book.

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'Apple is TERRIFIED of women’s bodies and women’s pleasure' – fresh tech sex storm

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Re: Christ

Dick, cock, and so on have perfectly normal non-vulgar/sexual meanings.

Clit, and the other c word do not.

The problem with rabid feminists is they see sexism everywhere.

However, as stated in the article, Apple accept 'penis', but not 'vagina'.

The problem with misogynists is that they often refuse to accept that sexism exists, even when it is pointed out to them.

To be perfectly clear here, the same applies to misandrists (I once heard a 'feminist' acquaintance claim that there is no such thing as misandry, which ironically is a very sexist thing to say, particularly for someone who claims to rail against sexism).

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Loyal Commenter
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You have 2 100% identical looking iPads, one is your dads and contains nude photos of your mum as the background, the other is yours...both have no battery left and your chargers are no where to be found...

An interesting hypothetical situation to be sure. Lets analyse this scenario...

"You have 2 100% identical looking iPads". If this is indeed the case, then I'd suggest you not only have too much money, but are a sucker for punishment. In any case, as any fule kno, apple products are already uniquely identifiable by the pattern of fractures in the glass fronts.

one is your dads and contains nude photos of your mum as the background, the other is yours. Well, what a stylish chap your father appears to be. Certainly, if I had nude pictures of my spouse on any device, I wouldn't leave it lying around, particularly not if other family members were about. Lets not even start on what a hideously gauche thing to do this would be in the first place, and not dwell on what your mother might think about your father acting in such a way.

both have no battery left and your chargers are no where to be found. Maybe it's time for apple to accept that the de facto standard charger is the micro-usb cable, and stop fleecing its customers for custom cables? Stop laughing there at the back!

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BT slapped down by BSkyB over O2 broadband 'switch off' porkies

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Re: Standard Form Letter

Length of ad run: <3 months

Time taken for ASA to find ad was 'naughty': >6 months

As sarcastic internet minions might say, "Onoes!!!11!!eleventyone!1!"

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Report: UK.gov wants to legislate on comms data BEFORE next election

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Communications data is now used in more than 90 per cent of serious and organised crime investigations and is vital in bringing serious criminals to justice and protecting the most vulnerable among us.

I would hazard a guess that it is currently used in >90% of cases because it is currently being slurped up like a fat kid with a milkshake. Whether it provides information that is useful to the investigation is another question; one which the answer to is explicitly not stated. Probably because the truth of the matter is that actual targeted evidence gathering is likely to be much more useful in catching and convicting the perpetrators of serious crime.

I have no problem with communications being monitored when there is a court warrant for a specific investigation. After all, this is a function that the police and security services are expected to perform. Wholesale monitoring of communications, and retention of everyone's private information is another, completely different, matter. It reeks of fishing expeditions, and should be something that governments have no hand in - it should be handled by the appropriate services (i.e. police and MI5) and overseen by the judiciary (not politicians), who are impartial, and not subject to such influences as the election cycle, party loyalty, and political donations.

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NASA: Satellite which will END man-made CO2 debate in orbit at last

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Re: debate settler?

Speaking of which, I once heard of a port town (in Greece, I think) that's no longer a port town because the water's moved several kilometers away. I've never seen a debate over how that happened or even the name of the place. Could someone perhaps elaborate?

This might have something to do with Greece (and Turkey) being positioned right above the bit of the planet where two major tectonic plates are moving towards each other. There are many active faults and earthquakes are common. There are also a number of settlements that are now below sea level for the same reasons.

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FAIL

Re: Debate settler?

"fact that CO2 levels don't correlate with temperature"

You only have to google 'CO2 temperature correlation' to show that you are talking absolute bollocks there.

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Like frozen burgers, 'Bigfoot' DNA samples have a touch of horse

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Re: Of those, 20 turned out to be glass or plants or were not suitable for analysis

I'm guessing, in this case, glass fibres, which can presumably be made to look like hair/fur samples.

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Loyal Commenter
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Re: Finds all are extant animals?

Considering neither exists, nor has either been proven, I would question your claim. Please supply DNA samples.

Existence is irrelevant in this case, 'Yeti' is a term for supposed Himalayan cryptids, 'Bigfoot' is a term for supposed cryptids from North America, as is 'Yowie' for the Aussie variant, etc.

Since there is no confirmed evidence for any of these, so you cannot confirm that any of them exist, the correct position to adopt is that if they do exist, then they are, until proven otherwise, separate phenomena.

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Mystery bidder plunders the whole haul in Silk Road Bitcoin auction

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Re: A Speculative Fiction

I'm not so sure about HSBC. The regulatory environment in China is distinctly unfriendly towards Bitcoin, despite around 80% of the BTC/fiat transactions taking place there.

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Cambridge's tiny superconducting magnet breaks strength record

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Re: Very impressive.

I like the idea of anyone wearing Beats having their head frozen in liquid nitrogen...

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