838 posts • joined 3 Jul 2010
When Fred Phelps dies?
"Fred Phelps has been burning in Hell for 2 days. Eternity minus 2 days = eternity."
The first of your translations is pretty much the accurate one; I've seen it commented before that the only things referred to as abominations in the Bible are homosexuality and the Anti-Christ. I'm not sure if that's true, but I think it shows that some people take things a teensy bit far.
Personally I think the late author David Eddings had it right when one of his characters commented, "Isn't it convenient that the prejudices of God always so closely match those of His prophets?" And if there's one thing God indubitably does hate, it's people who presume to speak for Him.
And by stiff...
... I think he means Steve Jobs. Bad taste, sir, bad taste.
It's not that simple
Each version of the iPhone has indeed sold more than the last, but the total number of smartphones sold has increased at a faster rate. Despite increased sales the iPhone 4 didn't increase Apple's market share - Antennagate may not have been the reason, but it couldn't have helped - and now Apple are faced with the second problem that they're no longer ahead of the game, so people who want the best phone out there no longer automatically gravitate to them.
When neither side has a significant technological edge, new users are left with a straight choice between iOS's simplicity and Android's freedom of choice. We're going to find out now if that is enough.
There is a difference, though
The iPad 2 was only really a refinement of the iPad, but it was refining what was already the leading product in the field. The iPhone 4S, on the other hand, is a product no better than - and in some ways, inferior to - top end phones released by other manufacturers months ago.
I wouldn't say the 4S will fail, because it will appeal to the people who want to replace their 3G(S) and keep their apps. However, it remains to be seen if brand loyalty alone can support Apple's business model of releasing a premium phone at a premium price when the phone is only just keeping up with the best competitors on launch day, and will be easily surpassed within six months.
Learn to read
The survey says Britons who want a tablet are willing to pay a maximum of £250 for one. It did *not* say that Amazon were planning to charge £250 for a Kindle Fire in the UK.
Nor did the survey say that anyone would pay £250 for a Fire. Most people who know enough about tablets to make a judgement will be using the iPad 2 as their idea of what a tablet is, so really the survey is saying that consumers think that £250 is a fair price point for an iPad.
Learn your history
In the quote, the thing the camel is passing through is actually a proper noun. The Eye of the Needle was a very narrow gate into the city, made for people on foot. You could get a camel through it, but it would be very, very difficult. Hence, what Jesus meant was not that it was impossible for the rich to get into heaven, but that they'd have to work extremely hard to do it.
No, no, no
Haven't you been keeping up? Samsung copied the next-gen iPhone and got their copy out first.
"Apple won't let developers do it"
Had you managed to tear your eyes away from the radiant glory of your iProducts for just long enough to read the article, you would have noticed that the logger was installed by the manufacturer - presumably as part of a firmware rollout. And, had the sight of a sentence not worshipping the Almighty Apple not struck you witless with shock at such a heinous blasphemy, you would also have realised that I was talking about Apple incorporating a similar logger into iOS. At no point did I ever mention a third party developer.
I will, however, gladly accept your invitation to call Apple a bunch of control freaks.
Because this being the highly-customisable and generally open Android platform, all you have to do is delete or block the offending app. If and when Apple think this is a good idea , you can be assured that they will put it somewhere that users cannot touch and you will be stuck with it unless you jailbreak.
 And patent it, and sue HTC for using it.
And what do they intend to use when they need to test the upper end of the intelligence spectrum?
Zombie Mary Whitehouse
Still needs brains.
... the "rock and roll causes violent behaviour" of the 1950s.
Kids rebel against their parents; the parents believe they've taught their kids the same values that they had, so inevitably blame something that their kids have and they didn't at the same age. There was probably a "ye pryntynge presse causeth violente behaveour" lobby in the 1390s - though we don't hear about their psychological research because of course, they didn't publish.
As memory serves, your Android apps are purchased by an account and may be installed and run on any device linked to that account. There may be a limit on the number of concurrent devices that can be linked to an account, but I don't know what it is without looking as it exceeds the number of devices I would ever own.
A is for Apple
I would not expect a company to replace my product if it went out of warranty. I do expect companies to provide warranty service that lasts a reasonable amount of time.
On a sidebar, my Samsung TV developed a fault just after the end of its manufacturer warranty. Samsung arranged for it to be picked up, taken to the nearest call centre 80 miles away, repaired and returned, all free of charge.
Until they find a way to suppress it...
... we won't have to wake you up.
And what joker decided the enzyme that controls the biological clock should be called "PERIOD"?
People, we must stand up against this blatant miscarriage of justice and protest. All together now:
RELEASE THE IPHONE 5!
To: The Department of Psychology, University of Illinois
You're my best mates, you are.
svelte /svɛlt, sfɛlt/ Show Spelled[svelt, sfelt]
adjective, svelt·er, svelt·est.
1. slender, especially gracefully slender in figure; lithe.
135 kilograms is 300lbs. I submit that nobody who weighs 300lbs could even remotely fit the description "svelte" unless they were well over seven feet tall.
I also do not wish to know how anyone can consider a person weighing in excess of 350lbs to not be bloody enormous, when this is a weight not often achieved by contestants in the World's Strongest Man competition.
He knew exactly what he was typing, *dude*
"Merkin" is a common online term used to describe people from the USA. It derives from their response to the question "Where are you from?", which frequently sounds like "I'm a Merkin".
This is not a PICNIC
Regardless of how a piece of backup software is used, uninstalling it should not have the potential to damage the OS.
Don't think of it in terms of 56 phones against one
Think of it in terms of people who want a heilPhone versus people who don't. The people who don't want one win - hugely.
"No benefit apart from watching movies"
So you don't think that watching movies (and also TV these days) would be one of the most obvious and common uses for a portable device with a decent sized screen and media browser?
The second common use for tablets is to read digital magazines. While magazines do usually use paper sizes with the standard sqrt(2):1 ratio, digital editions don't need to use the outside margins because the purpose is served by the tablet frame and they also dont need to use the gutter except on two-page splashes. Excluding the margins moves the ratio closer to 1.78:1 than to 1.33:1, making widescreen the better choice for display.
The third main use of tablets is for web browsing, which involves looking at content designed for PC monitors. As nearly all new monitors are widescreen these days, a sensible site designer will at the very least make his page compatible with both 4:3 and 16:9 formats, and he may even design it primarily for 16:9 display.
In summary: 16:9 format is at least as good as 4:3 for every main use of a tablet, and in most cases will be better.
As for patenting "app store", it's like patenting "chip shop". Apple should be told to fuck off ... and that can't be patented either, as French Connection UK were told when they tried to claim sole rights to putting the letters F, C, U and K on clothing in any order as a single word.
Use of manatees to write Family Guy episodes
This project will commence when they feel the urge to increase the quality of the writing.
Not to defend Apple...
... but the reason they have sporadic product releases is because they only release new products sporadically. Are you perhaps talking about waves of stock intake?
Try reading the post first
He said "last month", not "in perpetuity". So, try searching for "Manchester riots" and see exactly how many stories you find about gangs of 100 people roaming the streets stealing everything that wasn't nailed down after first stealing the nails.
"Peter ... I can see your house from up here."
The ISPs are actually selling you the knife with no knowledge that you plan to use it to stab anyone. They are still being held responsible for selling it, though, you are right there.
@AC 17:04 220911
ISPs may know where data is being sent from and to without having to look at it, but they still do not know what it is. They don't even know that it is illegal just because it's P2P traffic - for example, it's possible to patch World of Warcraft through the Blizzard Downloader without receiving a single byte from Blizzard themselves.
Also, due to VPNs and IP spoofing, an ISP cannot definitively prove the source or destination of its traffic. So, you fail again.
But only because Thomas Edison is dead. When it comes to stealing other people's ideas and passing them off as their own, Apple have *nothing* on Edison.
In fact, they stole the idea from him.
"Apple ... could always come up with their own method"
You appear to have forgotten to put the troll icon on your post. Here, have one from me. Unless Apple have patented it, of course, in which case that will be £50,000 settlement fee and £5,000 for use of icon, plus you must show Apple the next six icons you plan to use on posts. You have also incurred £170,000 in legal fees payable to ourselves, remittance to be made within 28 days.
Jedit, Jedit, Jedit and Jedit
We already know what happens
1) Apple go out of the phone business.
2) Everyone else stops suing everyone else.
Apple have more cash in the bank than the US government.
"I doubt you have seen a Galaxy phone"
*takes his out of his pocket*
*looks at it*
Nope, sorry, I can tell that it's not an iPhone. The big logo at the top, the rectangular home button, the illuminated menu and back buttons and the fact that I'm not a twat are the significant clues.
So what you're saying is..
... that if you remove all the incredibly obvious differences between the Galaxy S2 and the iPhone, the S2 would look JUST LIKE AN iPHONE!!!!??? My God! How did I not see it before?
Apple aren't going to do that
Because they know that they can't win. This isn't a swipe at the quality of iProducts; it's inevitable that the major companies who are in competition both with each other and with Apple are going to put more effort into innovating than Apple can, if only because five heads are better than one.
Apple have thus far been able to maintain their strong grasp on the smartphone market because of their monolithic approach - don't have a range of products that do different things, have one that does everything - but now HTC, Samsung et al have caught up, Apple can no longer call the tune. The only way they can maintain their market share now is to prevent other companies entering the market.
As for the Samsung lawsuit, I believe it's a bluff. They don't expect the judgement to be passed, but when it isn't, they can use that as another lever to have the rulings against the Galaxy range struck down.
Poker isn't gambling
Not if done right, anyway. It certainly has no house odds.
Anyone know if the Christopher Ferguson mentioned in the article is Chris "Jesus" Ferguson? I really hope not - bad enough to see a name as big as Howard Lederer involved, but a past WSOP Main Event champion as well would be a major black mark on the game's reputation.
... they *did* say "so long as it has any form of telecommunications capability". That would give the iPhone 4 a pass.
No, only one grocer was using them
And if more than one grocer is using them, it's "grocer's apo'strophe's".
"CD's have a built in 10 year limit"
Stop talking rubbish. I have CDs on my rack that I've owned for twice that long, and they still work fine. I bought my first DVD in 1999; that disc still works, and the only disc I've ever had stop working did so because of physical damage.
Moral: never believe anything you hear from someone who uses grocer's apostrophes.
Blaster bolts don't move at light speed
If they did, they'd be visible as a beam rather than a bolt.
I believe there's some handwaving explanation about them actually being vaguely plasma based, or something similar.
You clearly haven't seen Vader's "No"
If you had, you would realise that it wrecks the scene. As originally presented, Vader's emotional dilemma is made obvious through Dave Prowse's body language. Vocalising it strips away any requirement for subtlety of characterisation. Nothing plotwise has changed, but in terms of quality of presentation it's the sonic equivalent of taking a flying scene from Superman and putting the wires back in.
(BTW, you don't have to be an "obsessed fanboi" to believe that Han originally shot first, because it's blatantly fucking obvious that he did.)
Yes, that is how you use the past tense
However, as the use of self-operated checkouts at Safeway and other supermarkets is contemporary, the present tense is correct.
Your user name is most apt - you are indeed *our* retarded. Though to be a bit of a grammar pedant, in English you would actually say "your retard" or "your retarded person". Hope that helps.
I don't think about who to trust with my piss...
But I've thought about what I'm willing to trust PayPal with.
The IT angle? The forward slash, obviously.
No, they aren't a bank anywhere
But they act like they are.
I wouldn't trust PayPal with a drop of piss, let alone money.
Unless, of course...
... the two suns aren't precisely the same size and the same distance from the planet.
Losing your son to ego is unfortunate, but getting dropped in it yourself due to having not even a basic understanding of perspective is just downright embarrassing. And slapping a boffin icon on it makes it worse.
Only 20,000 Tabs sold
Mainly because Apple had it made illegal to sell the other 480,000. Nice of you to admit that Apple are trying to sue anyone who releases a genuine competitor product out of business, though.
"In the absence of a decent picture"
It worries me that you think this story would have been a lot more pleasant had it contained a high quality picture of a man crapping on a deceased spiky rodent.
Why government departments have Facebook pages
Apparently, it's because 7,856 people like them.
All threads on El Reg have erectile dysfunction
Or at least, none of them have been made sticky.
- Review Is it an iPad? Is it a MacBook Air? No, it's a Surface Pro 3
- Game Theory The agony and ecstasy of SteamOS: WHERE ARE MY GAMES?
- Hello, police, El Reg here. Are we a bunch of terrorists now?
- Worstall on Wednesday Wall Street woes: Oh noes, tech titans aren't using bankers
- Kate Bush: Don't make me HAVE CONTACT with your iPHONE