* Posts by Buzzword

716 posts • joined 30 Jun 2010

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Do you know where your trade secrets are?

Buzzword
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Re: In many companies...

Step 0) Find a client's project to charge it to.

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UK's GDS to hire 300 folk. Silver lining: They'll be evicted from Holborn

Buzzword
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Remote working didn't work for Yahoo; what makes GDS think they can do it any better?

On second thoughts, where do I sign up? I can probably pretend to work for GDS remotely while doing my day job too.

Might have less time to comment on El Reg though.

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Blighty's SMB tech ranks bitterly divided on Brexit

Buzzword
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Re: Border Control

Since the UK is outside the Schengen accord, we already stand in long queues at passport control anyway. Brexit or not won't change that.

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Gibraltar kids win UK CyberCenturion blue team hacker comp

Buzzword
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Re: what platform is there to show what you know

Well that's what exams and certifications were supposed to be for. Or there's professional accreditation. None of which is taken particularly seriously by the tech industry.

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IBM says no, non, nein to Brexit

Buzzword
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Company which benefits from big government contracts...

... is in favour of big government. That's hardly a surprise.

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Silicon Valley, season 3: CEO Richard learns humility, tech style

Buzzword
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Where to watch it

Non-Sky subscribers can either buy it from Amazon or Blinkbox at £18.99 a season; or stream it from NowTV at £6.99 a month. It's rather a pain having to subscribe to a different service for each show.

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Planning to throw capacity at an IT problem? Read this first

Buzzword
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Re: Throwing capacity at the problem ...

Often true; but sometimes you end up writing incredibly complex code and spending weeks optimising to get every last ounce of performance out of the system, when simply throwing more RAM into the box would have solved 90% of the performance issues.

This situation usually arises in government-type organisations, where the budget for man-hours has been approved but there's no budget for additional hardware until the next refresh cycle.

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If Android’s wings are clipped, other Google platforms may gain

Buzzword
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Split the company

The obvious solution to the anti-trust issue is to force Google (Alphabet) to sell off ChromeOS and/or Android as separate, stand-alone companies. That has been done before in telecoms, e.g. when Ma Bell was split into the Baby Bells in the early '80s.

In fact they could go further and force Google to split off e.g. its Gmail, Search, Cloud, and all the rest. Not sure how much consumers would really benefit though.

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Whitehall waste: Cash splashed on consultants and temps up 90% in half decade

Buzzword
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How do they expect to get services without paying for staffing?

“Funds that could be spent on services are instead going to pay costly and avoidable bills for staffing."

Seriously, how?

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Idiot millennials are saving credit card PINs on their mobile phones

Buzzword
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Bank account number/sort codes

Back in the old paper days, your bank account number and sort code was printed in the corner of every cheque. The cheque system itself was ridiculously insecure: a piece of paper granting easy access to any sume of money in your bank account at any time. People stored cheques at home in ridiculously insecure conditions (e.g. in an unlocked drawer).

Keeping your PIN safe is common sense; but it's hard to do any damage with your bank account and sort code. Jeremy Clarkson proved this in 2008 by publishing his bank details. The worst that happened was someone signed him up for a direct debit to a charity, which he was able to cancel immediately under the Direct Debit Guarantee.

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Cyber-security pro? Forget GCHQ, BT wants to hire 900 of you

Buzzword
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Here's a crazy thought

Train them in-house! Just like big companies used to do.

In fact, if the concept of forward planning still exists, they should have begun training them a years ago to be ready for today's demand. Plenty of people were predicting growing demand for such skills a few years ago.

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GCHQ is having problems meeting Osborne's 2020 recruitment target

Buzzword
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Mossad do it right

Get them in young, train them up as part of the army, then do your best to keep them onboard for grown-up work. The Israeli example proves it's perfectly feasible.

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Docs need to do remote consultations – report

Buzzword
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Outsource!

If we're going to have remote consultations, let's at least use cheaper doctors overseas. For the last couple of decades we've become increasingly accustomed to foreign doctors (at the last count, 37% of BMA-registered doctors were trained overseas). Most patients won't notice the difference if their tele-GP is in India rather than down the road.

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Microsoft rethinks the Windows application platform one more time

Buzzword
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Sounds like a reasonable plan to me. It's still a crying shame that they can't back-port the app store to Win7 though. That would have won over developers in a flash.

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Truly crap exhibition dumped on Isle of Wight

Buzzword
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Flushing meadows

People who visited this might also like to visit the Paris Sewer Museum. It's just a short stroll from the Eiffel Tower, where a discreet ticket booth provides access to the underworld of Parisian sewers. Particularly enjoyed by young children of the poo-fascination age.

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Save it, devs. Red Hat doesn't want your $99 for RHEL

Buzzword
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Re: Careful now.

How could you possibly accuse a former Microsoft man like Stephen Elop Harry Mower of destroying a company like Nokia Red Hat?

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California gets $5m pound of flesh from Samsung, LG, others in price-fix scandal

Buzzword
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Protection racket

Getting an occasional shake-down from the government seems to be a standard cost of doing business in the USA these days.

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Remix OS: China's take on an Android operating system – but for PCs

Buzzword
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Disappointed

Every "new" OS these days still uses Linux for most underlying functions. That's fine, and I'm sure it speeds up development immeasurably, but it's not really new.

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Stop whining, America: Your LTE makes Europe look slow

Buzzword
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But at what cost?

In the US, a T-Mobile 14 GB/mo data-only contract costs $65/mo. In the UK, an EE 15 GB/mo data-only contract costs £20 ($30). That's less than half the price.

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Facebook: A new command and control HQ for mobile malware

Buzzword
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Unsigned code?

I thought iPhones could only run code that had been signed by Apple after submitting to the AppStore. So downloading new (and presumably unsigned) code from Facebook wouldn't get around that.

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Bill Gates can’t give it away... Still crazy rich after all these years

Buzzword
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Tech geeks?

Carlos Slim Helu is a very rich man, but he's no tech geek. He bribed Mexican politicians to maintain a monopoly on telephone services, then raised calling rates to squeeze every last peso out of his customers (i.e. the entire country). Mexicans should be calling for his head on a plate; but they can't afford the calls.

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GDS gets it in the neck from MPs over Rural Payments Agency farce

Buzzword
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Internal IT

Ahh, the joys of having to use internal IT resources rather than going out to the market for the best supplier.

Personally I think GDS should be pared back to merely providing an advisory service for IT procurement, rather than doing it all in-house.

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Orange is good to go on VoLTE, Wi-Fi calling in Europe

Buzzword
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The promise of HD Voice

We're still waiting for cross-network HD Voice calls. The standard was defined in 2002-3; in the UK all the networks support it (O2 was behind the pack, but got there in May 2015). Practically all phones support it. Yet there's still no sign of cross-network calling.

Whatever chicanery they're up to with 4G calls, it'll be another decade before it reaches mass-market.

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Google human-like robot brushes off beating by puny human – this is how Skynet starts

Buzzword
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Dalek

But can it climb stairs?

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Elasticsearch cluster in a jiffy: Step by step

Buzzword
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A what?

WTF is an Elasticsearch cluster? Granted, the article isn't aimed at people who don't know; but would it have killed you to add a little introductory paragraph and a link to another article introducing the damn thing?

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This is why copy'n'paste should be banned from developers' IDEs

Buzzword
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Re: Code Review

> in what development language would such code be impossible to write?

You couldn't write like that in a functional language, such as Lisp or F#. Actually in F# you could just use the StringBuilder, but it goes against the ethos of the language.

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Uber driver 'pulls handgun' on passenger

Buzzword
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Re: should have shot him

Blood is hard to clean out of the seats.

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Five reasons why the Google tax deal is imploding

Buzzword
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So are they breaking the law or not?

I thought Google's dealings were, while naughty, not technically illegal. So why should either the UK or French governments get another penny out of them, without actually changing their laws?

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Gov must hire 'thousands' of techies to rescue failing projects

Buzzword
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Re: "he was useless, managed to delete the website a couple of times"

> "Why on Earth would you let a developer have access to a production system?"

If your team has fewer than five members, everyone has access to the production system. It also means your system isn't that valuable in the first place.

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Let's get GDS to build a public blockchain, UK.gov's top boffin says

Buzzword
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What problem does a blockchain solve in government?

This is just an answer looking for a problem. Government IT is beset by all kinds of problems: poorly-specified requirements, ever-changing needs, and of course getting locked in to long-term expensive contracts (HMRC I'm looking at you). Blockchain solves none of these problems.

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Microsoft: We’ve taken down the botnets. Europol: Would Sir like a kill switch, too?

Buzzword
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Products become Services

It's the servicifation servicisation financialisation of the economy. Soon you won't be able to buy a PC - you'll only be able to lease one, with capital and maintenance costs rolled up into a single monthly payment. We're already there with cars, with mobile phones, even with our homes. Why buy when you can rent instead? The mind boggles.

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Smartphone hard, dudes, like it’s the end of the world!

Buzzword
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From Reading services on the M4 to Toddington services on the M1 is about 63 miles of motorway driving, with no other services in between. Can any readers beat that?

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Google chap bakes Amiga emulator into Chrome

Buzzword
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Ahh, Amiga

A decent windowing system which booted up in less than a minute from floppy disk; in seconds from hard disk. It has taken the best part of three decades to get back to that state of affairs, and even then only thanks to SSDs.

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NZ unfurls proposed new flag

Buzzword
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Missing the point.

The whole point of a flag is that you can identify the nation from a distance. That applies equally whether you're looking at the flag on a ship on the horizon, or trying to see your football team's flag in the corner of the pub TV on holiday.

New Zealand's complex new flag fails this test miserably. Mind you, their old flag was just as bad, and far too easily confused with Australia's.

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JD Wetherspoon: A 'hacker' nicks 650,000 pub-goers' data

Buzzword
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DOBbing

Why do so many companies ask for your date of birth anyway? On principle I always give a fake one, unless they actually need it to run a credit check.

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Facebook to Belgian data cops: Block all the cookies across the web, then!

Buzzword
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Belgian police

Because it's not as if the Belgian authorities have anything else to do, right?

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London councils splurge wildly differing amounts on Oracle software

Buzzword
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Bottom line

Interesting that both Westminster and K&C are top of the league tables for cheapest council tax nationwide. From which we conclude that using Oracle costs far more than the benefits it provides.

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Oracle confesses to quietly axing its UK software support centre

Buzzword
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Re: unofficial support

Yep, quite a few it seems. Oracle really hate having their lucrative revenue streams undercut.

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Buzzword
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If they're that good, they could set up their own Oracle support company. They'd probably earn a fair bit more too.

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Ex-IT staff claim Disney fired them then gave their jobs H1-B peeps

Buzzword
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Train 'em or else?

I don't get this notion that they were "forced" to train their replacements. Option 1: they could always quit rather than do it. That might mean losing what little redundancy package they were offered, so option 2 is to train them really badly.

Option 3 (the most creative) is sabotage: corrupt the backups, rename rm to ls, mess with the monthly reports so that they always paint a rosy picture. It'll be a few months before they figure out what went wrong. Extra points for plausible deniability.

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FTC zaps more scammer loopholes with ban on wire transfers, cash cards

Buzzword
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Did they just ban Direct Debit?

Because that's what it sounds like. A "pre-authorised cheque" is just a repeated payment. The money goes from your account to the recipients account. How is that untraceable?

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'Shut down the parts of internet used by Islamic State masterminds'

Buzzword
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The footballer?

You'd expect this level of intellectual analysis from the other Joe(y) Barton, not from a US congressman!

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Brits rattle tin for custom LCD Raspberry Pi funbox

Buzzword
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Landfill Android

Wouldn't it be cheaper and easier to buy a budget / last year's model Android phone? Battery, bigger touchscreen, 3G / 4G antenna, SD slot, etc.

Ok so this makerbox wires up some GPIO pins to hardware buttons; but is it really that much of a gain over a touchscreen alone?

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Virgin Media hikes broadband, phone prices by five per cent

Buzzword
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ADSL can't hold a candle to cable broadband, but according to a well-known money-saving expert, you can currently grab 12 months of ADSL broadband + telephone, including line rental, for just £111. That's cheaper than most companies charge for line rental alone.

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GCHQ goes all Cool Dad and tags the streets of Shoreditch with job ads

Buzzword
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Re: Our Next Double-Oh.

Yeah, I'd worry about the suitability of the recruits in Shoreditch. It's an area where having a loud personality counts, and the job description includes telling everyone who'll listen (and plenty who won't) how great your new TwatFace-integrated app is. That's not the personality you want in a top-secret agency.

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Cops' IT too complex for quick and dirty revamp – Police ICT boss

Buzzword
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Where does it end?

Think of the waste involved in having different systems between French and British coppers. We could save so much money if we just had one great big European police IT service.

Then again, I'd better not give them ideas....

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I survived a head-on crash with driverless cars – and dummies

Buzzword
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Pavement Testing Facility - ignored?

So we've got a bunch of scientists in white coats determining the best road surface to use, taking into account durability, cost, repair time, weather-resistance, etc. Yet quite a few motorways in the UK still use concrete (the M25 southwest section comes to mind). Presumably the scientists' recommendations are ignored, as per standard UK government policy?

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Next year's Windows 10 auto-upgrade is MSFT's worst idea since Vista

Buzzword
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Make your bloody minds up!

You're the same twits who buy dodgy Chinese Android phones, then have the gall to complain two months later that they aren't being updated to Android Marshmallow. Either it's a good thing to always get the latest version, or it isn't. You can't have it both ways.

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Bacon can kill: Official

Buzzword
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Smoking kills, so ...

Just switch to unsmoked bacon.

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Microsoft re-writes the cloud service playbook

Buzzword
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Budgets

"Or perhaps they've made the mistake of building apps with tight coupling to particular services. Again."

Yeah, because every API upgrade can be made painless just by wrapping your code in an interface layer.

The more obvious reason is corporate budgets. This year's budget for Project Z has been spent; in order to upgrade the APIs they have to submit a new request for project funding, get the request approved, schedule a resource, etc. In some places you're looking at an 18-month lead time; even longer for government bodies.

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