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* Posts by Lamont Cranston

1166 posts • joined 27 Apr 2010

Google brings HD sneezing pandas to UK: But why?

Lamont Cranston
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Facepalm

£200 to replicate the functionality of both my TV and my Blu-ray player

(and most likely my PVR, when I get round to replacing my now defunct BT box)? Ooh, yes please!

Sarcasm aside, if this had a decent interface (both my TV and Blu-ray player have fairly clunky interfaces, and sit firmly in the "watch a YouTube video once and never touch it again" camp) AND PVR capability, I might be interested. But it doesn't even have a tuner, so far as I can make out, so what's the bloody point?

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Huawei Ascend G300 budget Android

Lamont Cranston
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Shame this wasn't out

a couple of months ago - I'd have probably bought one. Then again, Vodaphone - blech!

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Google Nexus 7 price, details confirmed in pre-I/O leak

Lamont Cranston
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re: WHERE'S RIDLEY SCOTT?!?!?!

Hammering nails into the coffin of the Alien franchise, last I heard.

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The Beatles Yellow Submarine restored

Lamont Cranston
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Joke

But,

what about the cartoon?

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Lamont Cranston
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"relevant"?

Go sit in Pseuds' Corner!

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Gone fishin' with Nokia

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Come on...

No joke can ever be funny, if it has to be explained. Still, we didn't have to read it...

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Microsoft's Surface proves software is dead

Lamont Cranston
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I have to agree with Gordon 10.

"Free" is a much abused term. I get a "free" phone with my mobile talk plan, expect that it's not really a free phone, no more than iOS is a free operating system - it's complimentary, if anything, but it isn't free.

Likewise, I got Windows for free when I bought my first PC (no, I didn't, I paid for it, but it's all wrapped up in the same package, so the consumer doesn't notice).

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Apple desperate to prevent nightmare scenario of iPad in Iranian hands

Lamont Cranston
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"and bought the iPad online"

Blimey - I might have accepted a free one as part of an apology, but I don't think I'd have been interested in carrying on with my purchase after that sort of treatment.

Racism? It just works.

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HBO 'sorry' for skewering Dubya

Lamont Cranston
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Re: horrified!

"representatives for substantial people groups in their nation."

Not so much a substantial volume of the electorate, rather those with substantial amounts of cash.

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Foundering Nokia pushes 10,000 bods, 3 veeps overboard

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Never heard of vertu before

They look destined to do a Burberry - luxury designs for the rich and famous, leading to cheap knock-offs, popular with chavs. I'm sure I could get the Vertu look by popping to the nearest market stall and purchasing the nastiest looking case for my [insert handset name here].

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Strong ARM: The Acorn Archimedes is 25

Lamont Cranston
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Is that Meg Ryan in the second picture?

I'll have what she's having.

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Lamont Cranston
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Re: "Novelly"?

NetWareish?

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Digital music sales beat discs for first time in UK

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Also e-books

Gift vouchers are very useful. The ability of the Sony Reader to forget that it's been authorised by Adobe to read books, less so.

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Lamont Cranston
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Re: Music on a stick

Love the downvote on this - you filthy pirate! ;-)

I gave my better half an SD loaded with music, to play in her new Sony Reader, at Christmas, although it was all ripped from CDs I bought for the purpose. Wish I had just nicked it all - she didn't like some of it.

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And the worst film NEVER made is...

Lamont Cranston
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@ JoeF

As Nicholas Parsons might say, "I'll let you have the benefit of the doubt."

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Lamont Cranston
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Re: And now something completely different

Great idea, but every other entry would be a Larry Cohen film, so it wouldn't really be fair.

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Lamont Cranston
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Megaphone

Re: Hedgehog Crisps

They were a brand, not a flavour! I got sick of explaining this at school - I can't believe it's come back to haunt me.

Eating a pack of Sea Salt & Cider Vinegar flavour, made me feel like such a sophisticated 8 year old.

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Hands on with the Intel-powered Orange San Diego

Lamont Cranston
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"rather than an obejctive review"

It's not a review.

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Facebook needs Opera - to rescue it from dependence on Apple

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Positive news

I think you've found the only good thing that might come of this (although I've found very few pages that don't play nice with Opera, of late), but it's far outweighed by the negatives: Facebook will take a wonderful browser, and make it crappy (not to mention that they will make a mockery of Opera's promises to protect their vast data hoard, too).

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WTF is... Li-Fi?

Lamont Cranston
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Sat under an endlessly flickering light?

Isn't this sort of thing banned by the Geneva Convention?

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Diablo III dev rolls 12d6, scores PC sales record

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Eh?

@ L.B.

I don't think there not being an off-line, single player mode is really that big of a deal. I'm a grown-up, with a job and family commitments, so my gaming, such as it is, is pretty casual (I completed Portal, last year!), and I've dealt with this by not purchasing a copy of Diablo III.

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Instagram-owner Facebook emits in-house camera app

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Isn't thiis already on android?

My Nokia (E63, so symbian S60, or something) had its Facebook app updated a while back, and a camera option appeared. Don't think it has a sepia option, though, which just goes to show how uncool my phone and I are.

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Max Payne 3

Lamont Cranston
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Re: That's not Max Payne!

Exactly. Max's permanent "turtling" facial expression was all part of the first game's charm.

On the plus side, he doesn't look like Mark Wahlberg, either.

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LG pitches £7k 55in OLED TV, again

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Most of the people buying these never turn them on.

Of course not - that's the butler's job.

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Google warns against ISPs hard on web filth

Lamont Cranston
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1. Apply to ISP for service

2. ISP agrees to provide service, and asks if you would

a) like them to filter your internet access, explaining that the intent is to prevent children accessing undesirable content

b) like them to provide you with unfiltered internet access

3. If you express a preference for option a), it should then be explained to you that it is not a 100% effective method of protecting your children (should you have any), and so you might wish to take extra steps (as your children are your responsibility, not the ISP's), and it may block access to some content that you might otherwise wish to view; if you express a preference for option b), it should then be explained to you that it, if you will be sharing your connection with minors, you might wish to take steps to filter the internet for them (but that decision will be left up to you, as your children are your responsibility, not the ISP's)

4. You make your choice, and pay your money; world keeps on turning, no one's rights are infringed upon, everyone is happy

This, to me, is how an opt-in system would work, and I have no problem with that. Given that not every adult can be expected to know what a DNS is, or how whitelists work, it seems perfectly reasonable to require ISPs to offer assistance to those who request it.

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Microsoft launches its own 'so.cl' network

Lamont Cranston
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B@stardising punctu@tion?

I'm afraid the paradigm shifted, when you weren't looking.

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NHS car-crash spatters CSC accounts with red ink

Lamont Cranston
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Oh, come on!

How on earth do you expect to bleed a company dry, before retiring on a fat severance package, with that attitude?

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Colour Kindle incoming says mole

Lamont Cranston
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Comic,

sorry, Graphic Novels, and kids' books, I guess. I like the idea, but I think that the current crop of e-readers are too small for reading such things, anyway.

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British 4G mobile data rollout 'will mean NO TELLY for 2m homes'

Lamont Cranston
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Re: All the extra channels are crap

I'm tempted to agree with this, but then I'd not have 5USA, and so be unable to fall back on guaranteed repeats of CSI, when there's nothing else on.

Maybe we could replace BBC1 and ITV with endless CSI and films where stuff blows up? That'd keep me happy.

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Ten... freeware gems for new PCs

Lamont Cranston
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Windows

My picks:

- Spybot S&D and COMODO, I have been virus and malware free for years, which is nice.

- SumatraPDF is nice - a lot nicer than Acrobat, anyway.

Must say, though, that I'm slightly surprised that one of the suggestions for a new Windows PC wasn't some variant of Linux!

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Computer nostalgia is 10 PRINT 'BOLLOCKS'

Lamont Cranston
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Re: The cure to nostalgia!

This, hard. I have many a happy memory of gaming on my +3 (loading off an external tape-deck, as nothing came on disk), but running an emulator on my PC and getting my hands on as many of my old games as possible, was a depressing experience.

Likewise, everytime I bought a "retro" games collection for the Playstation, part of me died.

I'm not saying that there were no great games available for the old micros, but if I could go back in time and show 8 year old me something like Kongregate, well... let's just say it'd create a terrible paradox when the 8 year old jumped into the time machine, and stranded mid-30's me in the past.

Apologies in advance if the universe starts to unravel.

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Biennial boner blights Beemer biker

Lamont Cranston
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Cheers!

As a southerner, I guess I'd better stick to a lager top, rather than any real beer.

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Lamont Cranston
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Coat

Re: Muphry strikes again

@ Dave Harris

Maybe he's from Yorkshire, and speaks T'Queen's English?

On reflection, this looks stupid when written down, yet seemed quite witty in my head.

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Indiana cops arrest violent 6-year-old

Lamont Cranston
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FAIL

Re: It never ceases to amaze me

"Lefties"? I'm on the left of the political spectrum, but I don't expect school to be the primary source of discipline for my children. What are you on about?

*a lack of sufficient income prohibits me from becoming a true Champagne Socialist.

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Courier mishap sends woman's corpse to shopping club

Lamont Cranston
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"BJ's"

Hee hee, "BJ's". Look, it says "BJ's". BJ's!

OK, I'm done.

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CSC axes another 640 UK IT workers

Lamont Cranston
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Re: What's wrong with buying British?

You'll never get a senior management role in the public sector, with that attitude.

Ditching your staff, then having them rehired (on worse conditions) by an inefficient private sector organisation, with one eye on its bottom line, and no eyes on your needs, is the way to go. OK, so services get worse, but at least you'll have a nice fat kickback to enjoy, and your PA can keep you insulated from the goings on in the real world.

Bitter? Moi?

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'Attitudes to robot sex will change'

Lamont Cranston
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Terminator

If this is going to eliminate the trafficking of child sex-workers,

won't this require sex-droids that mimic human children? And if so, won't that fall foul of the law?

Or is it all an elaborate honeytrap?

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Nvidia: phone GPUs to outplay current consoles by 2014

Lamont Cranston
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I could imagine

phone (in the Xperia Play mould) that could be plugged into a docking station to connect to a TV and proper controllers, to become a games console, in much the same way as the Atrix can become a laptop.

I can't imagine wanting one, but I suppose it would be one less thing to get nicked, if someone broke in to your house whilst you're away.

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ISPs should get 'up to' full fee for 'up to' broadband

Lamont Cranston
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Superficially appealing,

but wouldn't the "sliding scale" model of charging mean that there was no financial incentive to supply connections to hard to reach areas, thus widening the digital divide?

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Facebook: 'Outrageous, wanton, reckless, callous, disgraceful, wilful'

Lamont Cranston
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Joke

You should watch The X-Files,

and get yourself up to speed on how the US government has been covering up alien invasion attempts, too. Busy bees, the CIA.

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Google shows off Project Glass augmented reality specs

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Yeah, ooh aah, that's how it starts...

I wouldn't recommend that anyone watch The Entire History of You, on the grounds that it was cack-handed tosh.

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Aliens Blu-ray disc set

Lamont Cranston
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So, this is a lot like the DVD I already own,

but HD shows up the flaws in the filmstock, makes the visual effects look a bit ropey? Blu-ray players sound like a great investment.

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No-strings nookie radar tugged offline in stalking backlash

Lamont Cranston
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Facepalm

I uploaded my details to facebook,

told it I was young, free, single, and looking for a relationship, then made it all public. Now, people have read my profile and assume that I am young, free, single, and looking for a relationship. It's not fair!

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Pastebin.com hiring staff to get rid of activists' dumps

Lamont Cranston
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Who else

read all the quotes in a wheezy, James Earl Jones voice?

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With this ring, I thee frag

Lamont Cranston
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Joke

Not even married,

and she's already nagging him, and has even progressed to assault with a deadly weapon?

I'm sure they'll be very happy together. Her and his life insurance, that is.

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UK government says no to turbo e-bike

Lamont Cranston
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Class it as a motorbike,

or one of those 3-wheel scooters that you can ride on a car license, then subject it to £0 road tax (it doesn't emit anything, other than that sense of smugness that all cyclists give off*), and a requirement for insurance.

Result? Govt. boosts its green credentials. No one's going to buy one at that price but, on the off chance someone does, there'll be some comeback on the insurance if they manage to knock someone over.

Alternatively: Government gets over its silly objection to the import of a pushbike. No one's going to buy one at that price.

*myself, included

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Florida man 'fesses to naked Scarlett Johansson outrage

Lamont Cranston
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"he's remorseful for any of the harm caused to the stars"

He kept their names in the paper - will they be paying him for this service?

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End in sight for IT jobs outsourcing massacre

Lamont Cranston
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Joke

There's far too much common-sense thinking, in this forum.

You people will get nowhere in either politics or business, with this approach.

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iPhone 5 gets a 5in screen

Lamont Cranston
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Re: Peripheral?? Definitely!

Bluetooth earpiece, linked to a tablet in your hand/man-bag, running Siri-style voice recognition for calls and text (and possibly more). Would work brilliantly, but you'd feel like a right berk when using it.

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Toshiba outs monster 13in tablet spec

Lamont Cranston
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Couldn't they have given it a wipe

for the photos?

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