* Posts by Andy Mac

33 posts • joined 13 Apr 2010

Pains us to run an Apple article without the words 'fined', 'guilty' or 'on fire' in it, but here we are

Andy Mac
FAIL

Sad face

The only time I use my phone for music is sitting at work for 8 hours.

So the only way I can listen to music is if I let the battery run down while I'm doing it? Unless I pay a fortune for wireless headphones I don't want, only for them to run down too?

I assume some hideous frankenconnector with power and headphones will become available for "a price" but still more money for bespoke crap.

I can imagine the future:

"The amazing iPhone 8 is by far the lightest and thinnest and most beautiful iPhone we've ever made. Just plug the battery into the lightning port..."

The really sad thing is that it won't harm sales, thus encouraging everyone to do it.

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Australian Banks ask permission to form anti-Apple cartel

Andy Mac

Life's hard choices

Screw the banks or screw Apple...

15
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Cats understand the laws of physics, researchers claim

Andy Mac

Straight out of Monty Python

"Tell me sir, have you confused your cat recently?"

16
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Apple stuns world with Donald Trump iPhone

Andy Mac
Paris Hilton

What makes a Pro?

Isn't a small iPad Pro just an iPad?

3
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Smartphone hard, dudes, like it’s the end of the world!

Andy Mac

Mashup

Now put the Russ Abbott music against the Steel Panther video and I'm in heaven. Some sort of twisted, masochistic heaven, but heaven nonetheless.

P.S. Note to future self: stop posting on El Reg after drinking.

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Australian cops rush to stop 2AM murder of … a spider

Andy Mac
Childcatcher

Sympathy

The other day my 4 y/o son came to me in distress, telling me he'd seen a spider. Kerping it light and jovial, I asked him to show me where it was.

Fucking Shelob was on the wall. Even my Queenslander wife thought it was bloody huge. I may be a pommy arachnophobe but I doubt many normal people could happily let that thing wander freely around.

A full combo of Mortein, Thong and Dyson was required to subdue it.

3
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ACCC clears copper for the NBN

Andy Mac

"The ACCC advised citizens to promptly investigate how the nbn roll out in their area will affect their phone and internet services."

What nbn roll out in my area? The one that was supposed to start within two years, three years ago? The area that says "Here be dragons" on the updated roll out map?

3
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The $60,000 logo: What it costs to change a website

Andy Mac
WTF?

$60,000 to copy and paste a png?

I could have done it for half the price!

I notice they haven't stumped up the other $60,000 to change their domain name...

3
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Nobody should have to see their own rear, but that's what Turnbull's NBN will do to Australia

Andy Mac

...the same brain-deadening result

And that's why it will be a huge success.

3
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Netflix fail proves copper NBN leaves Australia utterly 4Ked

Andy Mac

Re: Dear Malcolm and Tony

It's not Ludditism, it's politics. The NBN was a Labor policy so it just had to be opposed, because they were like, you know, the opposition.

I'm surprised they haven't un-apologised to the Stolen Generations.

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Google flushes out users of old browsers by serving up CLUNKY, AGED version of search

Andy Mac

Re: What pleb uses Opera 12 still?

Opera 12 is still actively supported and I'll happily upgrade when they finally finish reinstating all the useful features they ripped out when they moved to Chromium.

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1

SCIENCE explains why you LOVE the smell of BACON

Andy Mac

Re: I miss real bacon..

When I first cooked supermarket bacon here in Oz I thought there was something wrong with it because it didn't shrivel up. Then I realised that was because it hadn't been pumped full of water like our native variety.

1
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NBN CO told to pretty itself up for bankers by 2017

Andy Mac

Promises...

I'm not sure if the government can claim to have fulfilled its promise to deliver the NBN cheaper if it runs out of money and doesn't get completed.

Still, when has that ever stopped them trying?

3
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Did Microsoft just paint TechEd Australia Azure?

Andy Mac

Whenever I watch a talk on Azure and they demo a feature, I'm left thinking "that was cool, but how much did it cost me?"

Until I work for a company that actually uses Azure, the hobbyist developer side of me couldn't care less and that's a shame as most Microsoft talks are now about either Azure or Win8 apps.

0
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Puking! protester! forces! Yahoo! 'techie! scum!' to! ride! vile! bile! barf! bus! to! work!

Andy Mac
Paris Hilton

"Die Techie Scum"... followed by a hashtag?

20
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Dr Hurricane unleashes FUSION POWER at Livermore nuke lab

Andy Mac

They are seriously letting a "Dr Hurricane" work on creating fusion power?

Have they learned NOTHING from comic books?

27
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Malcolm Turnbull's website makes funny Facebook fan numbers

Andy Mac
WTF?

Patience...

After promising to deliver the NBN sooner (at the cost of nobbling it), patience is the one thing he will not be getting from me.

6
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Whoops! Apple drops kimono, flashes 'FREE' GarageBand for iOS7

Andy Mac
Go

Tis true

I bought my wife an iPad last month and I was surprised that she had downloaded the iApps, knowing that they cost $10 (AUS), but we checked they were free for her. I'd still have to pay though.

0
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Microsoft offers Internet Explorer 10 preview for Windows 7

Andy Mac
FAIL

Still a pain to code for

It's great that MS have created a highly standards-compliant browser, but if it's only available to the users of the latest one or two versions of Windows us devs will still have to waste time coding for all those users who are quite happy with their copy of XP thankyouverymuch.

8
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Disney buys Lucasfilm, new Star Wars trilogy planned

Andy Mac
Unhappy

On a tiny positive note...

...there are worse people to have in charge than Kathleen Kennedy.

But overall, sad face.

0
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Nissan unveils 'self-healing' iPhone case

Andy Mac
WTF?

Indeed

It's not like the materials don't exist. I had a little iRiver about 8 years ago that spent a year bouncing around in my pocket with all my lose change. After the battery gave out (which I'm sure has nothing to do with the case material) it spent the next 6 years or so in a variety of junk boxes. When I finally threw it away, there was nary a scratch on the case or screen. Shame the same couldn't be said for any iDevice.

Why do we have to buy scratch-free covers for our devices when they could be manufactured to a better quality? (Rhetorical).

3
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iOS 5's iMessage chops carrier SMS routing traffic

Andy Mac
FAIL

Sent my wife an iMessage. She didn't get it. iMessage? Turned off. Stays off.

1
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Amazon set to build Aus data centre

Andy Mac

Insight into Amazon (UK)

I had some friends who published their own book in the UK. It was only for sale on Amazon and their own website. The more copies Amazon sold, the more they dropped their price, even though their only competition was a small website selling at RRP.

Eventually the Amazon priced dropped so low the profit margin was practically zero.

I guess there is an automated algorithm based on sale volumes although I doubt that applies across the board, especially electronics.

0
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HP dumps Apotheker for Whitman

Andy Mac
WTF?

"On the conference call, Lane said that Whitman was prepared to handle a large hardware operation because, as the CEO of eBay, she was required to purchase large amounts of hardware."

I buy a lot of food. It doesn't mean I'm qualified to run a farm.

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Much of the human race made up of thieves, says BSA

Andy Mac

Crime?

I thought it was a civil offense.

3
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Accenture closes in on Aus government e-health tender

Andy Mac
FAIL

Words fail me...

So Accenture bagged another e-Health project? I guess they have a lot of talent lying around after losing the NHS NPfIT contract.

And they wonder why government projects fail.

0
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Flash versus HTML 5

Andy Mac
WTF?

How will HTML 5 "win" exactly?

I'm still confused as to why HTML 5 is being touted as a panacea for Flash just because it has a video tag. Flash was, and is, used for all sorts of things, especially websites that allegedly look cool but are difficult and frustrating to use.

Unless, that is, we're still referring to HTML 5 as that gelatinous blob/amorphous mass of technologies that might include CSS 3 animations (we don't really know). Then I can see if having a fighting chance.

On an anecdotal note, I wanted to book a table at a restaurant while on the move on Monday. Went to the website on my iPhone and I couldn't even extract a phone number on my flashless device.

Flash is going to be around for a long time to come whether we like it or not.

2
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Egypt switches off the internet

Andy Mac

Lets book a holiday!

At least that's what the Thompson ad preceding this article wants me to do.

3
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Mac daddy predicts all-knowing, all-seeing UI

Andy Mac
FAIL

Train journeys are going to be fun

While I can see this kind of technological prediction actually coming true, I see public spaces full of embarrassed people murmuring into these little microphones.

Already we have these automated phone systems that demand you say "yes" or "no" instead of just pressing a button. They always make me feel a little foolish using them in front of other people.

I think there will be social consequences to this sort of tech, as we're seeing already with complaints about people on phones or MP3 players.

0
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Duke Nukem Forever release date revealed

Andy Mac
Go

Duke who?

There are going to be kids playing this game who weren't even born when it was announced.

1
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W3C tackles HTML5 confusion with, um, more confusion

Andy Mac
WTF?

This explains everything

I was wondering why the HTML 5 spec has taken 13 years to get this far. It's because they've been too busy designing the logo and writing vapid marketing bollocks.

1
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Google Maps daddy defects for Facebook

Andy Mac
Paris Hilton

It's too early for a Sunday

I just wasted a whole minute of my life wondering what a "daddy defect" was, why Facebook had them, and why Google was kindly helping to map them out.

1
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Apple in Brazilian iPad shocker

Andy Mac

More than a couple of things in common

Looking at this i-PAD, I don't think it supports multi-tasking or has a USB port. I think I'll be sticking with my ecg-pc for now.

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