* Posts by BorkedAgain

686 publicly visible posts • joined 2 Mar 2010

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Goatse.cx opens up again - as an email provider

BorkedAgain
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Re: No. It is not very good

Well, it made me laugh. That counts as a successful joke in my book, but I guess I have must have a faulty syntax filter on my sense-of-humour circuits. Or, possibly, really low standards.

BorkedAgain
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"...Goatse.cx has pulled opened its doors..."

Oh well played, ma'am. Very good. :)

SUN to GO OUT COMPLETELY: Here's how to watch online

BorkedAgain
Headmaster

Re: Pay

Sorry. The Doors' "The End", I meant. I know someone's going to pick up on that...

BorkedAgain

Re: Pay

I was visiting my brother in Augsburg for the 1999 one; a cloudy day, but the sky cleared up just before the thing started to get going. We had a brilliant garden party, and somehow the Door's "The End" came on the stereo just as totality was happening.

Incredible day. The memory still makes me smile.

Enjoy, Southrons!

'Perfect' INVISIBLE SHED stuns boffinry world

BorkedAgain
Coat

Re: Q preps the Aston

I think he meant Galactic Postcode; accurate to the nearest planetary hemisphere or significant moon.

Psst: Heard the one about the National Pupil Database? Thought not

BorkedAgain
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Re: Once information *is* collected its use and storage are *only* down a question of policy.

I wouldn't call Gove fat exactly, but yeah, I'd guess so too.

No thanks. Where's the "Opt out" button?

Kick your computer... before it kicks you

BorkedAgain
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Re: Printers...

"PC Load Letter? What the f* is PC Load Letter?"

Naughty-step Apple buries court-ordered apology with JavaScript

BorkedAgain

Re: Not true

*strokes chin*

Reckon...

Mmm, what's that smell: Coffee or sweat? How to avoid a crap IT job

BorkedAgain
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Re: Great Read

I'm guessing one of the reasons I love my current job so much is that they flew me out to the States (not cattle-class either) for the office tour. And the CIO picks up breakfast for the troops every morning, and genuinely gives a hoot.

Halo 4 game review

BorkedAgain

Re: most overrated game ever

No, it has a way to go to beat RoR in that respect. All those sexy pre-rendered visuals turning out to be a sub-Tekken-button-bash. I still chafe.

China's Goophone unveils US$99 Android iPad Mini clone

BorkedAgain

Re: AC re: Breitling

You could engrave it with the words "Too Late" so it's always accurate...

BorkedAgain
Facepalm

Re: Intrigued

Exactly. Character-building. And it isn't just the rip-offs that are susceptible either...

http://techland.time.com/2011/11/29/up-in-smoke-iphone-glows-red-on-plane-melts/

Now THAT's quality...

Granny upstages Microsoft, storms stage at Surface launch

BorkedAgain
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The spirit of Ballmer is strong with these guards.

They even had a chair ready at 0:32...

Better luck next time Blofeld! Five Bond plot myths busted

BorkedAgain
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"...the best way of killing somebody with a laser..."

Genuine laugh-out-loud moment there. Thanks for that! :)

Mysterious galactic glow caused by Hitchhikers' Krikkit style stars

BorkedAgain

I find the whole thing to be in remarkably poor taste.

Why James Bond's Aston Martin Top Trumps the rest

BorkedAgain
Happy

Re: Beg the what?

http://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=2290

Summary of conclusion: "My recommendation: Never use the phrase yourself — use 'assume the conclusion' or 'raise the question', depending on what you mean — and cultivate an attitude of serene detachment in the face of its use by others."

"Serene detachment" - doesn't that sound nice?

BorkedAgain
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Re: "Nerd alert"

Still, at least someone had fun eh? ;)

British car parks start reading number plates

BorkedAgain
FAIL

Are these the same muppets...

...I saw featured on Watchdog or somesuch similar program, who kept sending invoices to various local residents who lived near the car park and whose cars kept registering on the ANPR cameras as they drove to and from home?

Sky support dubs Germany 'Hitler's country'

BorkedAgain
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Spot on.

Bit of a shame. Can't honestly say every conversation I've ever had in any of the languages that weren't my native tongue have always remained perfectly polite, but then I'm lucky enough not to work anywhere as oxymoronic as Sky Customer Services...

Samsung Galaxy Note 2 review

BorkedAgain
Facepalm

Re: had for a week - just great @ the-nay-slayer

I think the point, if you would but listen, is that those things do not require a tablet, can be done on a smartphone, but are a comparatively joyous experience on this slightly larger smartphone.

I typed all of that nice and slowly, just for you. Don't know why I bothered.

Back to your "proper" smartphone with you. None so blind indeed.

BorkedAgain
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Re: As a note one user..

+1

The Note1 is such a fantastic device I'd have trouble justifying the upgrade for myself, but given the number of people that have asked for a look at mine* and then left nodding and cursing Apple in the past few weeks I'd say they'll sell a few of these...

* Oo-err missus...

Yale finds second diamond planet

BorkedAgain
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Re: Why are they all different?

Conjecture 1: It's a result of the way the solar systems form and evolve over time; denser elements tend to fall in towards the centre more, resulting in rocky planets nearer the sun and gas giants further out, perhaps? I've always envisaged it rather like shaking up muddy silt with water in a jam jar and leaving it to settle into layers, but jam jars don't generally have a thermonuclear furnace in the bottom so the model isn't perfect...

Conjecture 2: Because that's the way Jesus wants it to be.

World+Dog hails 50th birthday of the LED

BorkedAgain
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Re: Prior Art.

Very good.

Or the Smoke Emitting Diode?

Skype worm chats up victims - then holds PCs to ransom

BorkedAgain

Re: How devious

I'm sort of with Anon here; while I'm impressed with Lee's parents' common sense there is something seductive about online connections and the ease of communication which these new technologies bring that seems to enhance trust in many naive users, often to their detriment. Taking the piss out of them isn't necessarily the most helpful approach.

On a side note, is it actually possible to be conceited about anyone other than yourself?

Gavel fails to fall for Apple 1

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Yadda yadda!

Rounded rectangle bla bla patent yadda innovation etc!

Aha ha ha.

(In other news: Apple finally find a product they can't sell to fanbois)

iPad Mini pics spied on Twitter

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Happy

Aha ha ha ha!

You're a funny, funny person! I bet everyone says so, don't they? All your friend?

BorkedAgain
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...A few more iPad Mini rumour articles and you should have the hang if it...

Fortunately for you, El Reg is certain to provide you with plenty of fodder. Happy practising!

10 million iPad minis to 'outshine' their big brother this quarter

BorkedAgain
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Re: on the other pad...

Oh, wow, yeah I would totally buy that! Shiny!

Brighton marathon munchers banned from all-you-can-eat diner

BorkedAgain
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Re: @mark 63

Alpha,

I've been there - "The Pub", right? Stonking place. Decent nosh too. The true genius is that the screens occasionally update to show your table's ranking on the national leaderboard. I was there one night with clients when our table got into a race for first with some crowd in Prague... The stagger back to Hotel Continental was fun...

BorkedAgain
Headmaster

Re: Nope - Psyx was right - @ kraut

Depends on how many helpings you had in your meal, doesn't it? If you had ten helpings in total that would be exactly half-way through (assuming a steady rate of troughing, and we're not counting the wafer-thin mint as a helping...)

Event Horizon Telescope spots source of black hole jets

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Alien

Re: Universe = depressingly vast - @ Kubla Cant

Planetary rape - cue charming mental image of a BEM walking down the ramp of his flying saucer with a slender trowel in one hand and a determined look in his eye...

Larry 'Shared databases are crap' Ellison reveals shared Oracle database

BorkedAgain
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Well, there's a mystery solved at least.

I wondered who had inherited Jobs' Reality Distortion Field generator (since it obviously left Apple when he ascended to glory) and now we know.

Half of Milky Way's mass found in million-Kelvin gas cloud

BorkedAgain
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Re: '1 million and 2.5 million °K'

You are my old physics teacher and I claim my £5.

iPhone 5 Lightning cables sticking in USB ports

BorkedAgain
Joke

Re: STOP THE PRESS

Reminds me of an old joke from the IE6 days (probably):

"How many Microsoft developers does it take to change a lightbulb? None - they simply declare "dark" to be the new industry standard."

Perhaps a re-write is in order...

BorkedAgain
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Re: Usual Apple bashing

@SolidSoup

I upvoted you because I got the joke. Y'funny. :)

Apple iPhone 5 review

BorkedAgain
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Re: First sentence wound me up immediatly

Last year's Note works wonderfully with or without its stylus, and while unashamedly man-sized it's nowhere near as massive as everyone says once you get used to it. I haven't played with the new Note yet (no need; old Note's got plenty of life in him for the time being) so can't comment on how well it operates, but as long as Samsung haven't screwed it up (and they don't tend to do that) it's probably pretty useable...

Or get yourself invited to one of the better class of trade show. There's generally someone in there handing out pens with capacitive stylus tops in exchange for five minutes of sales pitch... ;)

New guide: Bake your own Raspberry Pi Lego-crust cluster

BorkedAgain
Pint

Re: Nothing to say really...

...and here's a link to the relevant page, in case you feel like weighing in with your support...

http://www.facebook.com/SaveTheHobbitSouthampton

Mars probably never wet enough for life, nuclear bomb crater indicates

BorkedAgain
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@AdamT: Not to mention...

You forgot to mention:

"Radiant redhead Dejah from Cydonia (18) says 'I think it's too early to say with any degree of certainty what processes might have formed these claylike deposits, but I can't wait to have my curiosity satisfied!"

Nokia tears wraps off new Windows Phone Lumias on steroids

BorkedAgain
FAIL

Re: Take note Samsung

...Or the Note. That's not a rip-off. And people might choose to buy that...

Never mind, as you were...

Apple confirms 'surprise' September 12 event

BorkedAgain
Happy

Re: Fact - @ AC 19:45

Bless.

BBC dishes out fanboi-only telly downloads ahead of ITV plans

BorkedAgain
Happy

Re: Strange, the article - @ Jack Bodiless

Oh very fine, sir. Have an upvote. :)

'This lawsuit is not about patents or money, it's about values'

BorkedAgain
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Sounds interesting...

Got a link?

Jury awards Apple $1bn damages in Samsung patent case

BorkedAgain
FAIL

Re: Harrrummmpfh!

...or maybe someone objects to you not making any sense? Just a thought.

I didn't think you'd hit a nerve. You were far from precise enough. ;)

Doctor Who to hit small screen on 1 September

BorkedAgain

Re: Re: "Heartbreaking exit"

Reckon they'll wheel out that useful plot device that usually surfaces when the obvious answer would be "Um. Time machine?" - the "fixed point in time."

BorkedAgain
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Re: @Tom

I'm just glad to see that we seem to be agreeing that the Gay Dalek reboot never happened...

LOHAN sets clock ticking for explosive climax

BorkedAgain
WTF?

Re: Cool, very cool indeed

Oh come on. Who downvoted that? Unsporting. Bad form.

Ageing star sucked retinue member to death, evidence indicates

BorkedAgain
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Nice headline!

Interesting article, but top prize for the headline and sub-head. Classy. :)

The cooler side of the Big Bang

BorkedAgain
Facepalm

Re: Ever-expanding maelstrom

...or, to paraphrase Eliot:

This is the way the world ends

This is the way the world ends

This is the way the world ends

Not with a bang but a core dump.

BorkedAgain
Windows

Re: Ever-expanding maelstrom

Ah yes, the old "Blue Screen of Cosmic Heat-Death" theory...

Disney sitcom says open source is insecure

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Childcatcher

Re: Payback?

"...I am unlucky enough to have kids that can't seem to watch enough of this drivel..."

I feel your pain, man. Sat through so many hours with seemingly endless re-runs of Hanna Montanna, iCarly and who-knows-what-other-complete-bollocks running in the background that the ten-second clip linked in this article nearly made me claw out my own eyes...

Put in perspective, pretty much every single line in these shows is a set up for one of the cute characters to say their cute catchphrase (cue laugh track) or make a cute face (Cue "Aww...") or say their cute catchphrase while making their cute face (cue laugh track and applause) so anyone who would actually be influenced by the content will have been asleep long before the FUD hits.

Oh, and by the way, there is hope. My own previously-Disney-addicted teen is making a good recovery, and even has the decency to look embarrassed when Smiley Vyrus is mentioned... ;)

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