Kummer by name,
...Pooper by nature.
221 posts • joined 1 Mar 2010
...Pooper by nature.
Wasn't that a popular shoot-em-up from irem corp.?
No, you're thinking of Turdican (the first was OK but number two stank). Or possibly Ratchet & Clagnut.
I didn't play either of them, but just went through the motions.
...Also, this whole topic is just, eww. I'm decamping to a more salubrious comment thread.
in the vein of such crimes against the rules of English punctuation as Microsoft's "Connect();" conference, may I suggest you rename your app...
And when asked, you can say "well, the colon is central to the app"
...I think your app just rectum completely.
And I suppose they're worse than the Demonazi party?
Don't blame me, I voted for Kodos.
I built a new PC yesterday. As I hadn't yet installed Firefox+UBlock, but needed to look something up, I clicked the little blue e icon.
I had forgotten what a shitshow the Web is without script/ad/iframe blocking - thinking about it, it must be 10 years since I last browsed without block-tools installed. Popups, autoplaying videos, and - bonus - HTML5 video/animation that, as far as I can tell, IE has no way of stopping. (the "play animations in webpages / play sounds in webpages" checkbox options appear to be a sick joke from the days of embedded .GIFs and .WAVs).
And I'd only been searching for innocuous technical content. I shudder to think how much worse it would have been if I'd been doing my usual game of where's-the-best-torrent-site-now.
Short version: remember, there are millions and millions of IE users out there. To them, that is what the web looks like.
Dammit, people, we the technically savvy owe it to them to get them onto a decent user-centric browser ASAP. It's practically a human rights issue.
IIRC the press was complaining because back then "multitasking" meant "pre-emptive scheduling" which didn't grace Windows apps for - quite a while.
That fits my recollection, too... the "real" OSes (including AmigaOS) did pre-emptive multitasking, and the co-operative multitasking that pre-NT versions of Windows had was inferior.
The difference as I understand it is that under a preemptive system, the OS kernel does the time-slicing and determines how many CPU cycles to give to each task, and in what order.
With co-operative multitasking, it's up to each app to say "OK, I'm done, time for the next app to have control of the CPU", like a game of pass-the-parcel. Obviously, that renders the system hostage to the niceness & stability of the apps, but it's simpler and cheaper to implement.
The Amiga had pre-emptive multitasking - which was smugworthy - but no hardware memory management unit, which meant that one rogue app could still bring down the whole system far too easily.
For some reason where I worked at the time we called this 'Widows for Wombats'. I forget why, if there was ever a reason.
Nicely surreal, and I prefer that to our term for it, which was "Windows for Playgroups" (presumably, because we didn't see it as a "grown up" OS).
"And we got the same unhelpful response from Silicon Valley when we asked them to:
- make 1 equal to 0,
- give us the square root of -1,
- redefine Pi as 3.0, and
- create 37 new additional integers between the numbers 1 and 2.
They're just so mean!!!"
Hillary was then observed to stamp her foot petulantly, before demanding a pet unicorn and then moving on to criticize NASA for not inventing faster-than-light travel yet.
And the Grammar Baron spake thusly:
Oh, and "King's". Now begone.'
Aaargh I can't help myself... stop! stop! By the power of Strunk & White I abjure thee!
But on a pedantic note - the expression you seek is "lo and behold".
( I really must seek treatment for this compulsive urge to correct other people's grammar)
...about a girl who really, really likes the base of a statue.
But then, don't all their movies involve finding a plinth charming?
"Recently, my holiday home was burned down by Welsh Nationalists.
Bit rough really, coz it was in Spain."
A blonde walked into a butcher's, flushed and panting, and asked for his pork in cider.
Or of course the all-time classic from St. Pterry:
"Why, sirrah, why may a caudled fillhorse be deemed the brother to a hiren candle in the night?
Withal, because a candle may be greased, yet a fillhorse be without a fat argier"
The problem with me posting this online is that it's impossible for me to now bonk you lightly on the head with a bladder-on-a-stick, without which, of course, the joke just falls completely flat, dammit.
a family friend and amusingly called Dixon (though not of Dock Green, sadly)
Well duh, everyone knows real policemen live at 999 Letsby Avenue.
And their favourite food is Irish Stew (in the name of the law).
Perhaps he meant free 'reindeer'
Ah, the Register - always first with the best technology gnus.
Apologies if my posting came across as a bit frothing-at-the-mouth, but I'm in a ranty shouty mood at the moment.
I could have added:
GCHQ interception powers - granted to them "to fight terrorism". Next thing you know they're being used to "fight", as time goes on:
- paedophiles (that always-handy bogeyman to frighten Middle England)
- people downloading "extreme" pornography
- people downloading non-vanilla pornography
- people downloading anything that frightens the politicians
- economic threats, such as Johnny Foreigner buying his fighter jets from anyone other than BAE
..and so on.
My point about the Theresa May / Keith Vaz headlines was that there's a high degree of cognitive dissonance going on; if your party proposes legislation, the tendency is to think "they're a decent bunch, they have the interests of the country at heart, and they're right that <x> is a threat". If the other lot propose legislation, the instinctive reaction is "they're a bunch of fascists trying to snoop on every aspect of our lives". And yes, I'm as guilty of that propensity as anyone.
But we have to remind ourselves that governments change - bad laws endure.
My own inclination - and I appreciate that here I'm wandering off the topic and indulging in cod civics - is this: our British system of laws has evolved over centuries, shaped and checked and balanced to take account of human nature. It might not be perfect, but it works. Legislature, Lords, the Armed Forces, the judiciary and the monarchy all playing their part. It's arrogant in the extreme for us to assume that we can change one "bad" part of it and do better than our forebears. Tony Blair, I'm looking at you.
It's like looking at a carefully crafted Swiss watch mechanism, and saying "that cogwheel there is too big, it's ugly, it looks old-fashioned, let's remove it" - and then wondering why the whole thing runs fast, slow, and then bits start flying off and going sproing-pinnnng against the ceiling.
OK, that analogy could use some work.
And this is (one of) the reasons I'm firmly against the expansion of GCHQ/MI5 police spying powers that the UK government (of whichever colour) keeps proposing.
Because the bastards have shown, time and again, that if they gain a power for justification <x>, they'll end up using it for <y>.
Anti terror laws, for example:
2000 "For catching terrorists and keeping you safe"
2001 "Well, we can use it against paedophiles. Everyone hates paedophiles, right?"
2006 "How about tax evaders, too? Boo, hiss. Evil banksters robbing money from the poor."
2008 "For spying on people who are putting out their bins early or fibbing about which school catchment area they live in"
2015 "For rooting out journalists who show the authorities in a bad light"
2016 "For identifying people who sympathise with extremists"
2017 "For identifying people who harbour thoughts of racism or bigotry"
2018 "For catching people who might vote SNP/UKIP/Green/Respect/[insert your preferred bogeyman here]"
2020 "For finally stamping out the scourge of anyone emitting more than their annual CO2 quota"
And if you think I'm over-dramatising, here's an exercise.
Whether you're a Labour/SNP voter or more inclined to Conservative/UKIP, read these two "headlines" and for each one ask yourself "What do I think of this?"
1) "Theresa May Proposes Strict New Internet Monitoring Laws"
2) "Keith Vaz Proposes Strict New Internet Monitoring Laws"
If you disapprove of [the party you hate] proposing the law, but approve of [party you support] doing it, you're a hypocrite.
And if you approve of security laws no matter who's proposing them, then sorry, but I think you're an unquestioning sheep.
If you disapprove no matter what, then congratulations, you have principles. Don't let them try to tell you you're obviously a terrorist/paedophile/extremist/little-englander sympathizer.
Seconded. Made oi larf!
Somehow these don't look like minis as I remember them.
Ah, you obviously haven't seen the upcoming docking station/port replicator/golfball printer for the Surface Book.
Upvoted if only for the Blackadder reference.
The scenes with the Infanta Maria and her interpreter still crack me up every time.
Second only to the home-selling conversation with Mr & Mrs Pants in the season-II episode.
"What we're talking about, in privy terms, is the very latest in front-wall fresh-air orifices, combined with a wide-capacity gutter installation below."
"You mean, you crap out of the window?"
"Well, in that case, we'll definitely take it. I can't stand those dirty indoor things."
..Wait, what were we talking about again?
We now return you to your regularly scheduled discussion about PC sales.
Another reminder of what cloud really means: now you have it, now you don't.
Yes, this is part of why I dislike and distrust the current stampede to the cloud.
If I buy a 4TB hard drive from Western Digital, it will stay in my PC for ever (or more likely, for about 2 years given WD's reliability record, but I digress). I'd be pretty miffed if I switched on the PC one day to find that WD had "changed the product description" overnight via an online update, and the drive was now only 1TB.
Yet when it comes to the cloud, we meekly accept service providers changing the terms at their whim.. and always to suit them, not the customer.
Bah. Cloud is just a fancy new marketing name for the old "mainframes and dumb terminals" model - ye Gods, have we already forgotten why we fought to get away from that?
yeah, it went Scottish at one stage too. best i could do given the circumstances.
Ah, I feel your pain. Whenever I try to do any accent at all to impress people - say, a Sean Connery-like Scots brogue - it usually regresses inevitably and against my best efforts to Peter-Sellers-level, goodness-gracious-me comic Indian. Which confuses people. Haven't caused an international incident yet but it's been close.
But if you're claiming that your impression was of Sergeant Shadwell of the Witchfinder Army, then it was a very good one.
And as we all know, Leixlips sink ships.
Oh, put a Cork in it. Though I have to admit that was Halfway amusing.
Unless you fancy Dublin your chances with another pun, but don't make me Cross Barry.
(sorry, early morning, not enough coffee, weak puns are the best I can offer)
An appropriate one-liner courtesy of Tim Vine:
"I've decided to sell my Hoover. Well, it was just collecting dust."
Reasons why people don't update software on their systems:
2) Hassle and inconvenience of patching/updating mechanisms
3) Preference for the older version.
The first reason will always be with us, and user education - and auto-update systems - are probably the answer for them.
Plenty of attention has been paid to (2) - see comments above - but I think that's a red herring.
Speaking for myself, if a new version of software is compelling and offers added value, I don't care if I have to manually download it and install it, I'll still do so.
Which leads me to the third reason, which is one I don't think is appreciated.
We've seen a trend in recent years for new versions of software to be qualitatively worse than older versions. Gone are the days when new versions were automatically better; now, they're often an excuse for the developer to foist their own ideas about user interface, micropayments, or workflow.
iTunes 9 (I think?) which got rid of the Coverflow view for album art. Many people (myself included) liked "flicking through" our collections in this view to choose tracks. Gone. Not coming back.
Windows 8 / TIFKAM, need I say more.
Microsoft Office and the Ribbon interface.
Solitaire/Freecell in Windows 10 - "watch adverts or pay us $10 for this formerly free game".
These are all examples of software that the developer - and perhaps a large part of the user base - thinks have improved. But if you're someone who likes Coverflow, or the Windows 7 Start Menu, you'll fight tooth and nail to keep them.
It's a simple calculation: if I move to new version of Application X, I will lose <feature I like>. If I stick with the old version, I might be attacked. But I can mitigate against the latter.
Perhaps there's an argument to be made here for abstracting the user interface part of an application from the underlying security framework, such that the same security fixes can be easily made available for previous versions of the app (i.e, patching Windows 7, iTunes 8, Office 2003 etc against 2015 vulnerabilities). But there's little-to-no ROI for the vendors there, so I can't see it happening (more than the grudging extent they do at present).
Upvoted for the Mr Flibble reference. You, Sir, are truly the King of the Potato People.
skelband It seems to me that the test needs to be updated.
Yeah, that was my first thought too. Something doesn't add up in this version of Dyson's complaint.
Having vacuum cleaners auto-detect when they're drawing dust, and ramp up the power until no further dust is detected is a good thing, Shirley?
If the EU "test conditions" simply run the EUT for n seconds/minutes in a clean room environment, and make no attempt to simulate dust, and merely measure the power consumed - then
a) Dyson have a valid complaint, and
b) the test design sucks (ahahaha)
Has there been a misconception somewhere - by Dyson, the author of this article, or me?
But... if that was their actual response, then kudos to WD for being sensible in their response, and acknowledging it as an opportunity to do better.
Rather than taking the all-too-common-in-the-industry approach of threating to drop a lawsuit-bomb on the security researchers and/or invoking the DMCA.
(Assuming that wasn't a mere typo...)
Walking whilst in a state of extreme happiness and contentment?
Or perhaps you meant "Yay! Walking!" - the state of being enthusiastic and gleeful about walking?
In at least some American cities, that's a paddlin'.
True story, albeit told to me second hand... many years ago, one of my colleagues who was on a business trip to Houston from the UK decided to walk back from a restaurant to his hotel, which was only a mile or so. He got about 3 blocks before the cops pulled over and questioned him - refusing to believe that anyone who wasn't a vagrant would voluntarily walk anywhere. In the end they gave him a lift back to his hotel and told him not to do it again.
So yeah, "Yay! Walking!" can be an offence in the States.
I applaud them for their hard work.
Even if, for some reason, images of Admiral Ackbar come unbidden to my mind as I read this.
I think you seriously misjudge their market too. You're not their market, I'm not and nor is anyone on this forum.
Upvoted, but I wish there was a more granular "I hate the implications of your post, but dammit you're right and there's f-all we can do about it" button :)
That's a lot moire than many small businesses have.
I'm spotting a pattern here.
There may be trouble ahead
"But while there's moonlight, and music, and love and romance,
Let's face the music and dance..."
I now have that song stuck in my head. Thanks a bunch.
But seriously, I agree with your post.
Windows Update was an arrangement of trust - "I will give Microsoft permission to install new code on my PC, but trust them not to abuse that."
And they've broken that arrangement in spectacular fashion. We now face a future of having to review every single update in depth, to ensure that it doesn't make unwanted changes.
The UI is painful
Ooh, ooh...I got one...
Don't forget to mention the modal dialog that helpfully informs you that "your organisation does not allow Lync access from outside the network". Yes, I know, you fecker, that'd be because I have just resumed from sleep and the OS hasn't reconnected yet. But thanks for giving me a great big blocking dialog pointing out the obvious, that I now have to close before I can continue. Because closing the dialog once connectivity's established 5 seconds later would be too convenient.
Totally agree with you. Hateful app.
@DougS Take the average European who thinks they're hot shit in the parallel parking department and place them in an F150 or Land Cruiser
*shudder* Too true. Or something like an F-350 Super-Duty dually (quite a few of those around this part of OR). Anyone who even takes one of those downtown has bigger cojones than I - never mind trying to park it in anything smaller than a football field. Proper football or American, take yer pick.
(Note for Brits: the above is a 4-passenger pickup truck with approximately the external dimensions - and fuel throughput - of Stanlow refinery. Not the biggest truck on the market though... see https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F8P5vGcf-NU for The Ultimate.)
Interesting article, but why the snarky "At last - Americans finally get to parallel park" subhead?
Try visiting any large US city. Parallel parking aplenty.
Having said that, I parked in Portland Oregon last week and I felt like a total n00b. It took me about 3 attempts to get perfectly lined up with the kerb - could have had something to do with the shiny new Aston Martin that was parked behind me, and a little voice in my head saying don't hit it don't hit it don't hit it, for the love of God don't hit it...
Phrases you won't be hearing at NIST/the International Avogadro Coordination project/NPL/NRC:
"Just a smidge more"
"Eh, it'll do"
"Give it to the work experience kid* to finish off"
"Let's take the average and call it good"
(* but I bet the work experience kid got sent off for "a long weight")
My own take? Just define it as 2.2lb and the job's a good'un.
Sigh. Another of these periodic attempts to map the "wow omg technology is so cooool" mindset of the !Bong¡ Startup Set into real life - and it will fail.
Douglas Adams characterized the biggest problem with gesture-based technology far, far better than I ever could:
"The machine was rather difficult to operate. For years radios had been operated by means of pressing buttons and turning dials; then as the technology became more sophisticated the controls were made touch-sensitive--you merely had to brush the panels with your fingers; now all you had to do was wave your hand in the general direction of the components and hope. It saved a lot of muscular expenditure, of course, but meant that you had to sit infuriatingly still if you wanted to keep listening to the same program. "
Guns don't kill people, rappers do.
Did you see it in a documentary on BBC-2?
NUC? Can you elaborate please. I'm in the market for a new PC to put Linux on.
Intel's Next Unit of Computing, aka small form-factor PC.
(obRadioTimesDisclaimer: other small form-factor PCs and brands are available)
Comes with anything from a Celeron to a Core i7, depending on which one you choose. You can get it as a near-complete system (add your own RAM + WiFi + SSD) or just get the bare board and use a 3rd party case, which potentially adds space for extra drives etc. The system kit comes with a VESA wall-mount bracket.
We have been using Mint on the i5MYHE - it's an i5-based one with vPro/AMT support.
Just be careful on the RAM; many of the NUC variants need 1.35V low-voltage DDR3L SODIMMS, rather than the more-common 1.5V DDR3-non-L.
Another SFF system to consider is the Gigabyte Brix family, but in my experience the cooling solution on those is noisy as hell when under load (4770R).
LMK if you need more info.
Big Ed I got too tired of wireless router placement, boosters, extenders and fighting with my neighbors and gamer kids for wireless bandwidth.
I'm fortunate enough to live on a large-ish plot of land with no neighbours within about 200 yards. After months of futzing with extenders and powerline networking, I gave in and found a no-name Chinese AP; it supports 5GHz 802.11n, and the configuration page for Wireless Transmit Power includes the lovely, lovely option "Ignore Regulatory Limits"... allowing power levels that give me strong & fast wireless coverage across the whole house.
No, I don't get many visitors with pacemakers or dental fillings. Why do you ask?
Imagine for a second having to install windows 10 from floppy.
NOW that is a new level of hell
As someone alluded to above, I think the real meaning of Hell would be getting to disk #20xx of 2079, then hearing that GRAUNCH GRAUNCH GRAUNCH... GRAUNCH GRAUNCH GRAUNCH... and the dreaded "Disk Read Error. Aborting."
Oooh. Nasty flashbacks.
HP would manage it so badly that it would only be worth $100 by the time the ink has dried on the contract.
This being HP, the ink to print that contract would have cost more than that.
senior-developer levels of facial hare
Facial hare? The guy's name must be Warren.
This really Bugs me.
Ken Hagan Just block the outgoing connections. Too much (ongoing) effort? Well...
It's a market opportunity for someone who already has blacklisting software and who already maintains the blacklists that drive it. Of course, that would require the AV companies to grow a pair and actually take on Microsoft, so I won't hold my breath.
A sensible suggestion from a technical perspective, but this is just mitigation of the core problem; we/the IDS vendors shouldn't have to patch around Microsoft's arrogance and thirst for data.
An analogy: you have a car that, despite the manufacturer's assurance that it's clean, pumps out unexpectedly high levels of emissions. Is it for the manufacturer to fix? Or is it a great business opportunity to sell giant bin-bags that tape over the tailpipe and catch most of the fumes?
/me marvels at my brilliance
/me rushes off to register VAGbags.com
/me realises that it sounds far too rude
You were already saying that about Vista, weren't you ?
Silly Pascal, don't feed the troll. Wrestling with pigs, and all that.
Besides, "technophile" == "one who loves technology"... ow, what a cruel insult. Ouch. Sorry, but I'll gladly accept that description.
And it's surely because we love technology that we despise the marketroids and social media onanists who're systematically gutting the concept of PC-as-open-platform and turning it into PC-as-Telescreen.
JoS:The privacy setting controls not being located in one control panel item is telling. "We are purposely making this as difficult as possible."
Yep. You can always tell, these days, when a software vendor really wants you to do something - and when they don't.
Annoying in-your-face pop-ups, with no obvious way to disable them:
"OS 9.01 is now available for your iPhone" / "Click here to reserve your copy of Windows 10" / "Click here to switch on OneDrive"...
... a sure sign that <whatever> is for the vendor's benefit, not yours.
Having to apply an arcane Policy, or edit the Registry in 47 different places, or apply commandline incantations to turn something off...
... equally, a sure sign that <whatever> is something that benefits you, but not them.
And both cases give them plausible deniability: "We don't force people to upgrade to the new OS" / "We don't force people to install Skype"... nope, technically users can disable <behaviour X>, but you make life as feckin' difficult and obnoxious as possible until people give in and drink your kool-aid.
Bunch of pempsliders, the lot of them.
I'm in a foul mood at the moment and need a drink. Or several.