Posts by Mystic Megabyte

I must be missing something

I seem to have led a normal life without seeing any tweets.. From reading El Reg I understand that it so sort of communication system that "celebrities" use to let their followers know that they've had a dump.

WTF is that about and why should I care?

Disc full

I wondered why my cloud space is always full. Presumably the handle Mystic Zetabyte is already taken.

Is there an Arapaho word for this?

When working in any confined space why is the tool that I need behind me?

And how the hell did it get there when I only just put it down?

What?

Anyone who is recommending MS Office should be sacked immediately.

???

What a complete waste of time, money and resources.

It's sad enough already to see grown men wearing their football shirts in the pub but this "invention" will put them into a whole new league of fail.

Tweet?

What's that?

Different water

It might have been better to analyse the water and see if it was the drinking sort.

I would imagine that the cooling water would have tasted strange after being pumped around a lot of plastic pipes. You would think that it would have contained anti-freeze but it seems not to be the case. A coloured dye would make their life easier.

Maybe a spectroscope could have told them the difference.

http://hackaday.com/2012/08/27/turning-a-webcam-into-a-spectrometer/

Old news

20 or more years ago some crooks tapped into the phone lines of a gold broker.

They ordered a quantity of gold and presented a bankers draft.

When the broker rang the bank they were diverted to the crooks who verified the draft.

The gold was delivered and very quickly the crooks and gold vanished, never to be seen again,

It was a brilliant scheme, the gold gets delivered to you and nobody got hurt.

AFAIK nobody was ever caught.

The ancient and customary pub rules

1. Do not discuss politics

2. Do not discuss religion

3. Do not secretly record people in the bar

dum di-di dum dum

I'm sure that I saw a hollowed out volcanic island for sale off the coast of Japan recently.

Where's a white cat icon when you need one?

Modern Cinema

Because I live in a remote place I rarely go to the cinema. But last week I was in Glasgow and went to see Gravity 3D at the Odeon. The ticket price was over £12 and I had to endure about 30 mins. of adverts.

The most annoying was for some phone based "app" called Cineme which they encouraged you to play in the fecking cinema. WTF!

I will never go there again.

meh!

There is no difference between iPhone, Android, Microsoft and now Nokia. They are all controlled by the USA and in light of the Snowden leaks must be considered to be insecure.

I'm sticking with my dumbphone for a while yet, you fanbios just carry on arguing while getting your data slurped.

Common mistake

Take steroids, get into body-building, become insanely vain then violent.

meh

I read one day that two UK daytime TV personalites had retired after 25 years.

I had never seen them!

It will be the same for facebook.

A new role

Iain Standen should be made curator of one of the sunken U-boats that surround the UK.

I will supply the lead boots.

Smartphones

Yesterday I was thinking of buying my first smartphone.

Today I have changed my mind.

It seems that I will have to wait a year and then investigate the security of an Ubuntu phone.

?!

They must be testing it out because I just had a video call from Elvis Presley recommending a sailing holiday for only $999.

On a serious note this will go badly when the NSA have the ability to impersonate world leaders. Imagine an AI version of Kim Jong-un ordering his troops via video link to shell a nearby "rebel" regiment.

Nobody will be safe, anyone could be impersonated and discredited or blackmailed.

Minicabs, trust your dog

I had my last dog for 12 years during which time he was absolutely fine with anyone he met except one man.

I ordered a minicab to deliver some equipment, my dog took one look at him and was going to rip his throat out.

Make what you like of it but I think that my dog sensed something about that driver that was not good.

Meanwhile back in Paris...

Re: Point 3

We have a 900kw community owned turbine on this island. With the money it made so far we now have two free to use electric cars and two diesel/electric buses. There is also money available for local start-ups.

We also have a domestic 6kw turbine and it's making ~£6000 p.a.

So turbines aren't all bad.

What will reduce us to poverty is the fecking banks and the USA constantly developing better ways to kill people.

As for nuclear power plants, if they are so safe why can't we all have one in our homes?

De-centralized power generation would make sense. But "big business" would not want that and the government like to have the option to switch us all off if we get shirty with them.

Question 42

How many 9s are there in the price of an iPhone? A) 10 B) 20 C) I don't know but it's shiny.

Toys

All of our computers and phones are now relegated to Fisher-Price toy status.

They are only suitable for watching mainstream video and light browsing.

Do not use your computer for any form of business or private communication.

2013, the year that the "Paperless Office" finally died.

This is the BBC..

In today's news we can report that President Putin is a really nice guy and has opened a home for stray puppies.

Spooked

Judging by the amount of MS shills who make only one post* on the Ubuntu forums I would say that Mr. Shuttleworth is on the right track.

*The usual format is: "Ubuntu destroyed my <photos, phone, puppy>!"

Odd

What the hell is happening in NE Iceland?

Is this where the UFOs are going down a volcano?

Expensive

What's the call-out charge for a space plumber on Christmas day?

My invention makes Microsoft computers run faster*, I call it Windowlene.

Yours for only $50 a bottle.

*when sent down a water-slide.

Warning! Danger!

The first astronauts to Titan get attacked by banjo playing rednecks.

The Clue....

...is in the words "MASTER PLAN" on the graphic.

I bet he has a white cat!

RT?

That's a bit rich when all those Windows RT owners will be left up shit creek.

http://www.theguardian.com/technology/2013/nov/26/microsoft-kill-windows-rt-larson-green

???

"perhpas one of the last redoubts for theorists"

It seems that your spell-checker has decayed.

Facts

If nuclear energy were safe then I should be able to insure my house or possessions against a nuclear incident.

In fact it is impossible to get insurance for this type of accident.

Since when do insurance companies turn away money for events that never or rarely happen?

Go figure..

The screaming of the fans

LOL

Gis'us a job

May I be the first to apply for a job at LoyaltyCard, I think that all the management just got sacked and even I could do better than them.

My CV:

Management experience, none.

Shills

Judging by the amount of MS shills posting FUD on various Linux and IT forums I would say that they're getting desperate. As for me, I would not have a MS RT tablet as a gift.