* Posts by Mystic Megabyte

1213 posts • joined 18 Feb 2010

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'Neural network' spotted deep inside Samsung's Galaxy S7 silicon brain

Mystic Megabyte
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Alien

chip wars

"decision-making perceptrons"

Aren't they the arch enemy of the mysterons?

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Microsoft can't tell North from South on Bing Maps

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

>Well, as the old saying goes - Americans learn geography from war. Seeing as they have never gone to war with the Aussies, how can they know where Australia is?

The CIA knew where it was when they destabilised the Australian government. It always makes me laugh when the yanks bleat on about democracy while getting rid of any democratically elected government that they dislike. Too many to list so here's just one: http://www.williambowles.info/spysrus/cia_australia.html

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Five-storey Blue Screen Of Death spotted in Thailand

Mystic Megabyte
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huh!

I'm not seeing *any* images.

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ISS astronauts begin spacewalk to install new docking adapter

Mystic Megabyte
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Happy

snooze mode

Will it play The Blue Danube?

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BT best provider for 10Mbps USO, says former digi minister Ed Vaizey

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

More crap

"But what BT has done is incremental."

BT got £16 million from the Scottish parliament and upgraded our exchange to 512kbs. The scheme was codenamed "Exchange Activate" but should have been called "Rip-off the tax payer".

Luckily I can now stream video if there is no rain and it is between the hours of 1 to 5 a.m.

At this rate of "incremental" I'll be dead before fast broadband is available here. :(

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Cisco confirms two of the Shadow Brokers' 'NSA' vulns are real

Mystic Megabyte
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Black Helicopters

Russians?

Nope, it was Lisbeth Salander. Every fule kno that.

Also, ooops! (see above)

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Colour us shocked: ISPs not that keen to sign up for Universal Service Obligation

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

BBC

In my case it's the BBC who'll be losing. I'm one of the freetards without a TV but who uses iPlayer. That is I used to use it because these days my internet is too slow to stream it. So I won't be buying a TV licence, sorry!

BTW, BT is my least favourite company, they are total ***********!

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Native Skype for Windows Phone walked behind shed, shot heard

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: It'll be available on Windows Mobile

Yup, I abandoned Skype the moment that Microsoft bought it. I do not trust them.

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Adblock Plus blocks Facebook's ad-blocker buster: It's a block party!

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

moi, sponger?

>>Spongers. If you don't like their revenue model, don't use them.

Exactly, I don't use them, view them or go there. I also block *all* adverts for security reasons. Your "industry" is borked.

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Internet of Car...rikey what the hell just happened to my car?

Mystic Megabyte
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Linux

Re: Standard

This guy seems to have got off to a good start, scroll down to see the screenshots.

https://engineering-diy.blogspot.co.uk/

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Microsoft: You liked Windows 10 so much, you'll get 2 more in 2017

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: Steaming pile of

Known here as a crock o'shite

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Londoner jailed after refusing to unlock his mobile phones

Mystic Megabyte
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Unhappy

Re: Hmm @AC

I bow to your superior knowledge and that 120mm barrel pointing at me.

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VC vampire: Peter Thiel wants to live forever

Mystic Megabyte
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Re: Living Forever

" there's one where through some freak but nevertheless physically possible coincidence I turn out to be immortal."

Unfortunately that Universe has a habit of collapsing on Wednesdays :(

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US state sues Comcast for $100m in row over 'worthless' repair plans

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

Bastards

Crikey! This makes British Telecom look like amateurs.

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You think Donald Trump is insecure? Check out his online store

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

#obnoxious_arsehole

Is all that Trump crap made in China?

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Happy Sysadmin Day!

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

@ allthecoolshortnamesweretaken

Maybe you had to be there, I'm glad that I was not.

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Firefox to banish hidden Flash files – and kill off sneaky ad snoopers

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

Re: Flash @asdf

I use Chrome for similar reasons but on Ubuntu 15.10 it crashes a lot. Example 1: Log into bank, and get a "WebGL has crashed, continue or reload?". Example 2: Log into Plex and after streaming some movies and quitting I find that Chrome had actually crashed at the login screen (the auto fill password is where it goes wrong). Maybe these problems will go away when I get around to installing 16.04.

Chrome version 51.0.2704.106 (64-bit)

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Star Trek Beyond: An unwatchable steaming pile of tribble dung

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

Re: Just have to add this..

If only it were possible to make a Galaxy Quest 2. Star Trek is just USA in space :(

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Africa's MeerKAT looks at the sky, surprises boffins with 1,300 galaxies

Mystic Megabyte
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Alien

Re: Universe, life and everything

Do you think that's photons you’re seeing?

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Openreach boss Clive Selley wants Ofcom to wrap it up already

Mystic Megabyte
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I live in hope

Meanwhile at my house, the video that I was just watching on the BBC news site stopped playing with a "Not enough bandwidth" message.

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A journey down the UK's '3D Tongue' into its mini industrial revolution

Mystic Megabyte
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Happy

Your everyday quantum device since 1938

Which nicely illuminate my shed.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fluorescent_lamp

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Ad agency swipes 'unnamed bloggers' for calling out its cynically fake 'save a refugee' app

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: I Whee

Grey Goo has just confirmed why I will never turn off my ad-blocker.

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Idiot brings gun-shaped iPhone to airport

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

Re: US police "restrained"

Hey, are you the guy with the bunker up Cloverfield Lane?

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Paper wasps that lie to their mates get a right kicking, research finds

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

Re: The cost of cheating

I agree that this experiment was badly done and perhaps should not have been done.

These butterflies cheat ants by pretending to be one.

http://www.seeker.com/amazonian-butterfly-steals-precious-goo-from-ants-1904409937.html

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By Jove! NASA's Juno prepares to slip into orbit around Jupiter

Mystic Megabyte
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Boffin

@Chris 239

ElReg needs to have a new unit of disinformation/bollocks. I propose the "Gove". So "Instead, if the spacecraft successfully enters Jovian orbit, it will be descending into its fluffy clouds." would qualify as about 0.2 Goves.

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Man killed in gruesome Tesla autopilot crash was saved by his car's software weeks earlier

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

No bars?

AFAIK European trucks and trailers have side impact bars to prevent this sort of drive-under crash.

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'I urge everyone to fight back' – woman wins $10k from Microsoft over Windows 10 misery

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

Re: Who's next?

uBlock Origin does not let me go to CNET, says "Badware" whatever that is.

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DARPA's 'flying wing' drone inches closer to lift-off

Mystic Megabyte
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Mushroom

Here are the missiles that you ordered.

"that can launch from a ship, deliver weapons, and return, "

deliver weapons"? Shirley that should be "blast the crap out of someone"

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Raspberry Pi 3 tops SBC poll for self-brew hackers and Linux folk

Mystic Megabyte
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Happy

Disclaimer: I have no connection other than being a customer

Now your birthday or Christmas present buying dilemma is solved!

https://thepihut.com/products/kodi-edition-raspberry-pi-case

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Filet-O-Phish: Insecure NFC tag relics hidden under Maccas tables

Mystic Megabyte
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Unhappy

History lesson

Back in ye olden days was the chain of Wimpy Bar. they sold burgers and had cutlery made of something called metal. Then came in the media a big story of how McD was coming to the UK. They came, I went, it was crap and AFAIK it remains crap.

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Password reset: 45 million creds leak from popular .com forums

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

what?

"popular sites including motorcycle.com, autoguide.com, and mothering.com"

None of which I have ever heard of! Presumably they are USian.

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Microsoft and LinkedIn: What the CEOs are planning

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Spam

All the Linkedin invites that I get are marked as spam, MS just wasted a lot of money. Also, only Linux used here!

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British Airways slaps 'at risk' sticker on nearly half its app delivery dept

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: Experience Certainty

I went there and just got this: (Is dreict similar to Scottish rainfall?)

"File Not Found. Please turn on client scripting or browse with a browser that supports client scripting to allow the 404 url dreict feature to work."

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Mars' dust storms follow seasonal patterns say NASA boffins

Mystic Megabyte
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Headmaster

Typo

"Mars boffins reckon they've found seasonal found patterns in Mars' dust storms."

Too many founds!

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Post-Safe Harbor: Adobe fined for shipping personal info to the US 'without any legal basis'

Mystic Megabyte
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Unhappy

>>People still keen to leave the EU?

When you see clowns like Boris and Farage saying "leave" it's probably better to do the opposite.

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Why does an Android keyboard need to see your camera and log files – and why does it phone home to China?

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

Anybody here installed Firefox?

I backed out of installing Firefox when it asked me for my grandma's maiden name (slight exaggeration). Seriously, I thought that I had been hacked and shut down the phone.

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FBI tries again to get warrantless access to your browser history

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: Coward

That title is supposed to be a joke. Maybe you have not yet grasped the subtleties of British humour.

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Scots denied Saltire emoji

Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

2 x Twats!

The day after the referendum Alex Salmond said that the "No" voters were tricked. That's like calling them stupid. No Alec we were not tricked, after all those years in the planning you had no plan for the Scottish currency.

Next up Nicola Sturgeon says that she will keep working for an independent Scotland. What the fuck use are these "leaders" when they first insult and then ignore majority of the voters wishes!

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So. Why don't people talk to invisible robots in public?

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

Already done!

In a nearby town there's a guy called "Bob the builder". He hangs around the pub doorway seemingly doing business deals on several phones. Unfortunately they are all imaginary :(

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Latin-quoting Linus Torvalds plays God by not abusing mortals

Mystic Megabyte
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Headmaster

Amo Linus

I studied Latin when I was 11 and 12 years old and that's about all that I can remember of it :(

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Science Museum maths gallery to offer the perfect pint

Mystic Megabyte
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Pint

enforcement

Judging by the thickness of that tankard's walls I can imagine that the Trading Standards officers of the day would just beat a cheating landlord around the head with it to get compliance.

Cheers, by some miracle it's already Friday here :)

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As US court bans smart meter blueprints from public, sysadmin tells of fight for security info

Mystic Megabyte
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Stop

Re: Really? Does Law Frame Allow This...

Dear energystar, what you smoking?

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Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Where's the insurance policy?

Phil Mocek should try a FOI request for the indemnity (if any) offered by the makers of these meters. If they are hacked by terrorists a whole lot of damage could be caused by repeatedly switching on and off multiple houses.

So if the makers T&Cs state " We do not guarantee that these devices are fit fit for purpose" or maybe "We accept no liability for any damage caused by this device" then we need to know. Who pays when it all goes wrong?

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How Nokia is (and isn't) back in the phone business today

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

SMS feature request

On my old Nokia 6310 it would tell me when a SMS had been sent. This is important because where I live sometimes a SMS will arrive 24 hrs. after being sent*. On my new "smartphone" it only shows when it was received :( Well duh' I just heard it beep so that when it got here. WHEN WAS IT SENT!

*Oddly, If I send a SMS to New Zealand (in the other hemisphere) it will arrive almost instantly.

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China's new rules may break the internet warns US government

Mystic Megabyte
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Devil

Re: China: Criminal Nation, Is Totalitarian. Surprise.

Today, President Trump decreed that from now on the internet is to be called the Trumpernet and everybody who uses it has to pay him. Why he had a pencil in each nostril has yet to be explained.

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Big Pharma wrote EU anti-vaping diktat, claims Tory ex-MEP

Mystic Megabyte
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WTF?

Re: Hurrah!

>The panic response didn't stop the Wolverhampton school machete attack a couple of months later.

A machete is not a gun, WTF are you on about? Did some nasty law stop you fondling a weapon?

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You can always rely on the Ancient Ones to cock things up

Mystic Megabyte
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Re: Oh so true (the water feature)

What you have to do is this;

Roughly determine where the leak is.

Get a bucket and a screwdriver.

Position the bucket and using the screwdriver make a small hole in the ceiling.

This will allow any water to drip into the bucket.

If you don't do this your ceiling will collapse.

That would be expensive, whereas filling a small hole would be cheap.

You owe me £50!

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Mystic Megabyte
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Joke

Re: Hmm...

A Spaniard asks an Irishman if they had a word similar to mañana. The Irishman replies, "Yes, but it doesn't have the same sense of urgency".

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Mystic Megabyte
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FAIL

Re: not only sentient but sentimental

I drove my Quad system up to Cambridge and they re-valved it, fixed a pre-amp problem and re-built the electrostatic speakers and then posted the lot back. Cost? £180!! That has to be a bargain, even in 1983.

To my eternal shame, living in Germany in 1987 I flogged the lot for £500 :( Why? That was to buy my first PC, I should have kept the stereo. <exit stage left, gnashing teeth>

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The 'new' Microsoft? I still wouldn't touch them with a barge pole

Mystic Megabyte
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Coffee/keyboard

Re: I'm not so sure it's ALL Microsofts hubris

They're like a dog suffering from ADHD on a bouncy castle that just had the contents of a ball pit dumped in it.

LOL, I nearly spat out my whisky and we know that's a crime. (Got home early on a Friday)

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