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* Posts by Baudwalk

95 posts • joined 3 Dec 2009

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iPhone user SHAMEGASM: 'I beg of you', delete sex app from my purchase list

Baudwalk

Sit on my face...

and let my lips embrace you.

Or wasn't "SitOnMyFaceTime" a prompt to sing Monty Python songs?

It's always Monty Python time.

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Creepy battery-operated TEDDY BEAR SEX TOY. Sadly, this is for real

Baudwalk

I wonder...

... Is that bearly legal?

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Fanbois Apple-gasm as iPhone giant finally reveals WWDC lineup

Baudwalk

Apps for the phones of China

Sung to the tune of "Oil for the lamps of China".

Well, that's what my inner ear was imagining, anyhu.

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Minecraft players can now download Denmark – all of it – in 1:1 scale

Baudwalk
Paris Hilton

Baltic?

Even Paris is confused.

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'I was like, yea!' 5-year-old found his Xbox so easy to use, he hacked it

Baudwalk

Kristoffer Von Hassel...

...broke into computer networks for fun at the age of 5.

Sounds like Marvel's next Dr. Doom reboot.

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Nothing to sniff at: Dell Ultrabooks REEK OF CAT PEE, scream users

Baudwalk

Well, that's just taking the ....

Meow.

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Stallman's GNU at 30: The hippie OS that foresaw the rise of Apple - and is now trying to take it on

Baudwalk

>>> But Firefox’s Linux kernel, called Gonk, is licensed under an Apache and the Mozilla Public Licence (MPL) <<<

Surely the kernel itself still has to be under GPL.

Are you talking about some specific modules or user space extensions?

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Furious Stephen Fry blasts 'evil' Reg and 'TW*T' Orlowski

Baudwalk
Thumb Up

Congrats, you've made the big time

And you're still my fave Unkind, Misogynistic Lesbian Online Publication.

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Another MYSTERY evacuation: Google UK empties swanky offices

Baudwalk

I realise Google are crap at anything to do with customer service...

... but I didn't know they were just as poor at informing their employees about why things go tits up.

I assume a reason will be given afterwards. Would not giving one even be legal, workplace regulations wise?

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Bottomless, unsatisfied Xbox widow cuffed after boyf flees nookie

Baudwalk
Coat

What's the problem?

>>>bit him on the left forearm, and grabbed his testicles and began to twist them<<<

Sounds like perfectly fine Sexy Times to me.

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Mobile RSS?

Baudwalk
Paris Hilton

Re: Mobile RSS?

OK.

Gave your newest Android app version a spin. Much better than the old one.

Dark theme: Big plus.

Wouldn't auto-launching the app, rather than the browser, be as simple as registering an intent for "http://go.theregister.com"?

If so, I'm kind of wondering why that's not already in the app.

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Baudwalk

Re: Mobile RSS?

Oh, no. Please. Not the app! It really is the slow and unappealing sibling to your sleek and sexy mobile site.

And it doesn't even include the comments section, which is my main reason for wanting an RSS feed to point me to m.thereg, as I can, and do, use ReadItLa^WPocket or GoodNews's mobiliser for reading the articles.

It's just that, since switching to mainly reading on the go, I no longer read the comments anywhere near as often as I used to, because the desktop comments section doesn't format well on my phone.

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Baudwalk

Mobile RSS?

Could you make it so that http://m.theregister.co.uk/headlines.atom would return a feed where the links pointed to m.thereg... rather than www.thereg...?

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RIM ends Reg headline pun filth (and launches two new phones)

Baudwalk
Thumb Up

I hope they make it

I'm not likely to leave the Android camp any time soon, but I'd like for them to become a credible third player. Or fourth, if Nokia survive.

Let's get some proper competition going again. And less of the ridiculous trench warfare between the two current combatants.

Fingers crossed icon?

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Mozilla to Adobe: PDFs don't need no more steenking plugins

Baudwalk

Re: What about the other way round?

Firefox on Android can.

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Torvalds: I want to be nice, and curse less, but it's just not in me

Baudwalk
Pirate

Hakkaa päälle!!!

The post is required, and must contain letters.

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Kick your computer... before it kicks you

Baudwalk

Bully!

>>> there has never been a better time to physically abuse a computer, since they are smaller and lighter then ever before.<<<

Where's the fun in that? That's just picking on those smaller than yourself.

Now, hitting a desktop or tower cabinet of old, could hurt you too. Much more sporting. The same for CRTs, like others have mentioned.

It was also a lot less expensive to thump a solid box like that. These wimpy notebooks we have now would break before any useful amount of aggressive energy had been spent.

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Apple pays up for stealing design from Swiss Railways

Baudwalk
Joke

Wilhelm Tell revisited?

Them Swiss do have it in for that particular fruit.

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Happy 20th Birthday, IBM/Lenovo ThinkPad

Baudwalk

Aww

That PC110 looks adorable. :-)

I wish manufacturers these days would make laptops with keyboards like the old ThinkPads.

It'd be worth a €100 premium.

Even Lenovo's (the best of the bunch by a mile) aren't quite as good.

And HP's current EliteBooks' are the worst yet.

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NASA working on faster-than-light drive capable of WARP TEN

Baudwalk

Re: Warp Ten is not 10x SOL

An African or European weasel?

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Baudwalk

>>>it would require a minimum amount of energy equivalent to completely annihilating the mass of the planet Jupiter<<<

Halliburton are said to be looking into it.

>>>if it were mishandled - would explode with a force of some 17,000 megatons, equivalent to several global nuclear wars all in one<<<

With Enron as equal partner.

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Acer Iconia Tab A700 32GB HD Android tablet review

Baudwalk

Oh, matron!

>>>a very pleasant to the touch dimpled behind<<<

And a ring interface too?

(Yes, I have been hitting the spiked cough syrup. Got a runny nose.)

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All you need to know about nano SIMs - before they are EXTERMINATED

Baudwalk

I'll have you know...

... some of us are old enough to know the "credit-card-sized monster" as the traditional SIM.

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Health minister warns ISPs: Block suicide websites or face regulation

Baudwalk
Flame

Problematic on so many levels

Freedom of speech.

Freedom of information.

Freedom of self determination.

Freedom of self termination.

...

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Thanks ever so much Java, for that biz-wide rootkit infection

Baudwalk

Re: @ Trevor_Pott

>>> 1) My wife, close friends and selected coworkers. <<<

I take it She Who Must Be Obeyed doesn't read the Register. Not giving her the top spot on her own.

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Leaked Genius Bar manual shows Apple's smooth seductions

Baudwalk

Urrgh

I feel dirty^Wunclean^in a non-optimal sanitary state after reading that.

Not that Apple are unique in employing projectile vomiting^W^Whigh velocity emission inducing sales techniques.

How ever much I wish they were.

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Bogus Android markets seized in FBI software crackdown

Baudwalk

With the low prices for the vast majority of mobile apps...

...why on Dawkins' green earth do people bother with these (possibly malware-infested) sites?

With DVDs I can understand feeling pissed off at those annoying, over the top, unskippable pieces of shite^Wpropaganda the b'stards force upon paying customers. But Android apps?

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Processor pioneer Victor Poor dies of cancer at 79

Baudwalk
Stop

I realise it's inevitable...

...that these are the very years that quite a few of the pioneers of the tech industry are going to expire, but I can't say I'm happy about it.

R.I.P.

"Personally, I don’t endorse the notion of mortality." -- Kinsey Millhone

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HP to take one more stab at consumer tablets

Baudwalk
Facepalm

Who's their CEO of the week?

So much for captains of industry confidently outmaneuvering the competition.

HP are more like whitewater rafting: "Left. LEFT! NO, NO! THE OTHER LEFT!"

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Nokia CEO: No shift from Windows Phone

Baudwalk

A pity...

...they killed off Maemo^HMeego.

I was very happy with my N800 (got the navigation suite too) and would have loved a phone like it with capacitive touch.

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Huawei Ascend P1 Android review

Baudwalk

The screen

>>>The only fly in the ointment is that it uses a PenTile matrix but that shouldn't bother most people. It certainly didn’t bother me.<<<

A lot of people feel the same way and aren't bothered.

But some, like me, find the PenTile layout VERY noticeable. I've got a One S and can safely say that I'm never again getting a phone with a PenTile screen.

Movies and pictures look great but text looks pretty crap compared to the Sensation's LCD job.

Also, browsing most websites with their white background on the One S's AMOLED drains the battery like crazy.

I read most articles in Pocket with its dark theme, so not a huge issue for me, but IMHO still something to keep in mind when getting a new phone.

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Welcome, friend, to Metroland

Baudwalk

Re: Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V

Except for when I'm stuck with the notebook's crappy, built-in keyboard with its inaccessible insert and delete keys. Then Alt-W and Ctrl-Y are preferred.

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Baudwalk

Re: Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V

No.

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Indian navy computers stormed by malware-ridden USBs

Baudwalk
Pirate

B.Y.O.D.

In the Navy, yes, you can bring your own device.

In the Navy, yes, you can snoop our files with ease.

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An early iPad adopter? You smut-ogling filth-gobbling perv!

Baudwalk
Paris Hilton

Gidgets or gadgets?

Were the 'researchers' sure the subjects understood the question?

Being early adopters, they might have thought the question referred to Unboxing Porn.

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US Judge says IP addresses don't identify pirates

Baudwalk
Coat

“abusive litigation”?

Was that possibly also the title of one of the pirated cultural epics?

The rain coat, please.

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What kind of LOSER sits in front of a PC...

Baudwalk

What kind of LOSER reads books whilst on holiday?

OK, OK. I did that too last year.

Something to do while the toddler had his nap.

But I personally prefer to bring a few cheap paperbacks to a mediterranean beach resort rather than an easily nicked $100 e-reader.

Closer to home, though, I prefer e-readers in one form or another.

But I've never invested in a dedicated reader.

While I'd no doubt find a small e-ink reader the superior experience, it'd be yet another device to bring with me, as well as an additional $100 for a single-purpose device.

Back in the day, I found the Palm III xe perfectly adequate, and now I use my 10" tablet which, IMHO, is not at all too heavy for this. YMMV.

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Fondle my slab, baby: Inside the tactile world of Apple-fan iDating

Baudwalk
Happy

>>> An Android user cannot be described… whereas an Apple user can be described, in many ways. <<<

Love it.

That quote works in so many ways. Whether you're of the droidian persuasion or an iFondler.

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The Commodore 64 is 30

Baudwalk

Slightly rushed article?

Apart from the factual errors, it seemed a little thin compared to your BBC Micro 30th anniversary article. IMHO, of course.

Still, I can help feeing a burst of rose-tinted nostalgia whenever the C-64 comes up. Love(d) mine to bits.

The things you could do to kit in those days. Soldering a pause button into the system to stop the CPU by pulling the Address Enable Control low, only to find you needed to add a flip-flop to sync it with the Ø2 clock, or the CPU would crash more often than not. (Hey, I was just a teenager learning the ropes of the electronics trade. Greener than corroded copper wires, I was.)

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Fear and slow loading: Eclipse celebrates 10 unsettling years

Baudwalk
Facepalm

Eclipse is fine...

...as long as I don't have to use the damn thing.

I've given it a test run from time to time over the years, but could never accept the crippled text editor and the ###CENSORED### configuration system, where I have to go through every colour and indenting setting for every language/file-type I want to edit, rather than having a set of common settings.

And then only to discover that all that work was stored in the workspace!!! Not as a system- and/or user-wide configuration!!!!!!

And then, of course, there are some colours that you just can't change...

I hate it with a passion.

And now that the Eclipse based Rational Software Architect has been foisted on some of us at work, I'm seriously considering changing jobs just to escape this smelly heap of manure.

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Steve Jobs had 'personal moral failures', was no role model

Baudwalk
Headmaster

>>>Brian Kernighan was brilliant.<<<

What do you mean "was"? Is he dead too (like, say, Dennis Ritchie)? ;-)

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Baudwalk
Holmes

And this is news to whom?

"There's nothing evil about Bill Gates and there's nothing nice about Steve Jobs" -- Chuck Peddle

Or something to that effect. It's years since I read "The Spectacular Rise and Fall of Commodore".

Highly recommended BTW, if you like your computing history. And for anyone who doesn't know who Chuck Peddle is.

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Feargal Sharkey moves on from UK music org

Baudwalk
Thumb Up

A good chief exec is hard to find...

Certainly one in the music biz who doesn't come off as a Little Thief.

I guess It's All Over Now.

Sorry. Had to get it Out of My System.

Bon voyage, Mr. Sharkey.

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El Reg in SHOCK email address BLUNDER

Baudwalk
Coat

"We are in the process of blowing the whistle on ourselves"

PlayMobil or it didn't happen!

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Dennis Ritchie: The C man who booted Unix

Baudwalk
Unhappy

R.I.P.

Nothing against that other famous tech fellow who departed not long ago. But for this geek, Ritchie's departure is much sadder news.

raise(SIGTERM);

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Reebok used 'very fit woman' in buttock-related deception

Baudwalk
Headmaster

Nice...

...err, I mean that's outrageous. Yes, that's it. Outrageous.

Now, what was that she said about 11 percent harder?

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The Secret of Monkey Island

Baudwalk
Thumb Up

Ahhh...

Or indeed Arrrrr.

My timber just shivered from nostalgic bliss.

I want. Big time.

*sigh* But I don't have the time to sit at my PC long enough to play these.

May have to check out the ScummVM for my Android tablet.

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First-person shooter swaps guns for cameras

Baudwalk
Happy

Hot Coffee mod?

Anyone?

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Gartner: Apple rivals can't touch iPad

Baudwalk

>>> i want to used the device in portrait and both honeycomb and manufacturers dont like that <<<

In what way?

I use mine in portrait mode 90+% of the time. That's for reading e-books, mail and browsing.

Of the top of my head, I only remember using it in landscape for Android Market and for playing Angry Birds and Sprinkle.

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PC World throws in free Bravia telly with Sony fondleslabs

Baudwalk

You're not wrong

But not entirely right either.

Some people do buy 'droid slabs at iPad prices. I did.

No, I'm not an Apple hater. I just compared what the two platforms offered, considered what my needs were, and went for an Asus Transformer.

Most choose an iPad, but with Apple's serious sales figures, even reaching a fraction of those numbers at this point may still look like a potentially very lucrative market to get an early foothold in.

Just because HP seem hell-bent on making every wrong decision possible in the mobile market, don't think *all* the Android makers are just as clueless.

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