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* Posts by tirk

232 posts • joined 24 Nov 2009

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Windows Phone 8: Microsoft quite literally can't lose

tirk
Coat

Re: why would windows phone 8 succeed?

"Nothing has changed since the abysmal failure of windows phone 7."

Except now people are begining to see the same interface on their Win 8 desktops and notebooks...

So what's worse than "abysmal failure"??

2
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It's Lego's 80th birthday party, but only the boys are invited

tirk

Cheap Lego

1. Car boot sale

2. Take bricks apart and tie into pillow case.

3. Wash on gentle in washing machine

Result - Cheap, hygenic Lego for kids.

(Me, I chewed the lead paint off Meccano whan I was a kid!)

1
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Gartner: UK PC market stayed on its knees in Q2

tirk
Windows

"Windows 8 and Ultrabooks now look even more important."

They're doomed then.

1
1

Doctor Who gets one-off special to mark Time Lord's 50th year on telly

tirk
Unhappy

Suddenly I feel so old.

I remember the first transmission.

2
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‘Printed boat’ places second in novelty race

tirk
Coat

Re: How many students did they kill in the process?

No students, but many Bothans....

3
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Apple iOS 6 beta limits number of apps per device

tirk
Headmaster

"This is a crazy amount of apps. "

It may or may not be crazy, but it's definitely a number, not an amount!!

(Kids of today - I bet all the nostalgic humour of Wack-O! would be lost on them, sadly.)

3
1

Shuttleworth: Why Windows 8 made us ditch GPL Linux loader

tirk
Thumb Down

Re: Windows 8 compatible

Interesting that secure boot is a requirement to get this logo, but a touch screen (which you actually do need to make Metro useable) isn't. Now what should we conclude from this? Either a/ MS care deeply about the security of their users or b/ MS care deeply about the security of their revenue stream?

21
1

London cops order Julian Assange to turn himself in

tirk
Trollface

Re: What Julian Needs...

If they used a spanned zip he could fit in the standard sized ones!

3
1

NASA counts down to nuclear tank invasion of Mars

tirk
Joke

Re: Excuse my ignorance...

Well shucks, isn't 21 bigger than 20?

When will NASA enter the 21 century and adopt rational units??

12
0

Samsung frees fanboys from iPhone with freeware

tirk
Windows

Re: What I don't get

Last year I moved from WinAmp to iTunes (on buying an iPhone!) and whilst iTunes is undoubtedbly odd and frequently counter-intuitive, it does do the job (I don't recall a single crash after a few when it was first installed, incompletely) and does have a few cute and possibly unique features (Genius mixes, smart playlists...)

I suspect rather like Outlook, it's not as bad as people remember now!

2
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Microsoft set to 'do a Nexus' with its Surface tablet

tirk
Pint

Big difference from Google Nexus

Google arguably created Android to provide a friendly mobile channel for their existing business, and created Nexus to help the adoption of Android. They have no interest in Nexus per se, but similarly they have no interest in Android either, except that it helps keep a slice of the mobile market for all things Google (for example, Apple dropping Google maps for iOS 6).

Microsoft, by contrast, seem to hope to make money out of Win8 on the tablet itself, especially as the Arm version includes Office, which is probably the most expensive software many people have on their Windows PCs.

Along with Apple (who make quite a bit out of apps, but mostly I think out of hardware), that makes for 3 significant players with very, very different buisiness models. Could be fun over the next few years!

0
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Microsoft's uncloaks Phone 8 developer preview

tirk
Devil

Re: "Phone 7 users won't be able to upgrade to Windows 8"

Anyone who invests in release 1 of any Microsoft software is going to get their fingers burnt in several ways - this is just another of the inevitable "fails" of an MS first go at something new.

A better question is, was WP7.5 release 2, or is this?

3
1

Microsoft takes on tablets with keyboard-equipped Surface

tirk
FAIL

Re: "...Metro capable devices will overtake iPad by next Summer..."

Hardly comparing like with like here. "Metro capable devices" include phones, laptops, desktops and any Surface tablets that they may manage to shift. "...iPad" ignores the bulk of the iOS base, iPhones.

And the bulk of iOS users like iOS, whereas the current consensus is that the bulk of Metro users by next summer (desktop/laptop users) will hate it, as it just gets in the way of them using "traditional" Windows applications.

5
1

Wraps come off UK super-snooper draft plans

tirk
Facepalm

Re: VPN?

Lucky then that international terrorists, crime bosses and the like will never think of that!

2
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Microsoft 'mulled Nokia buyout, ran away screaming'

tirk
FAIL

Re: Metro on the desktop

> Most of the genuine complaints about Metro involve desktop machines

Yes of course - but that's where MS make their money, now and for the foreseeable future. There's no margin for MS on phones and tablets, as they are only profitable as hardware. I think that just leaves ganes consoles as a revenue stream for MS, assuming they stick with Metro or bust.

Good luck with that!

2
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Windows 8 Release Preview open for download

tirk
Unhappy

Re: What the hell are MS thinking.

Phones. Possibly tablets.

Definately not PCs or notebooks.

10
0

Minority Report-style swishery demoed with cheap webcam

tirk
Windows

Re: Microsoft already did it!

Yes, but Windows 8 is all full screen, and has banned windows!

0
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SpaceX does what it HASN'T done before: Dragon in close ISS flyby

tirk
Happy

Re: Go SpaceX

I watched the lunar landings. This feels like it could have more long term significance TBH. (Though I was similarly optimistic back in '69 as I recall)

9
0

'Dated and cheesy' Aero ripped from Windows 8

tirk
Trollface

Windows 10...

Punch card input and a teletype output??

1
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Baidu touts mobe with 100GB web drive

tirk
FAIL

Re: Of course the tech's similiar to Google's.

How can you steal Imaginary Property?

0
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Apple's HTML5 bet against Android extermination

tirk

Re: As far as the tablet market is concerned, what about the gorilla in the room?

Here are a few reasons why Win8 may be less than a stellar sucess on tablets.

MS traditionally sell through inertia/corporates ("I've never heard of Linux"/"It's what we use at work") on Desktop/Laptops. Now Win8 doesn't look to be a roaring success on devices like these, that aren't touchscreen. Indeed, many corporates may be very slow to move from Win7 to Win8, and may miss it entirely, so people won't see Win8 at work. What's more they are much more likely to know of alternative OSs on tablets, and to see them as more consumer oriented ("sexy") than anyrthing MS produces.

What's more, MS *never* *ever* gets anything radically new right with the first release. The thrid is normally the first acceptable one, and allowing WP7 to be the first in this particular sequence, that ties in with the weaker statistic that every other main OS release they produce tends to be sub-standard.

MS have a real fight on their hands to get into the tablet (and phone) OS market. They have deep pockets, and can play a long game, but they need to, unless they want to go the way of IBM and become a company that only deals with the corporate sector.

3
1

Ten... alternatives to Samsung's Galaxy S III

tirk
Trollface

Re: WP7 does seem a bit "Marmite" doesn't it?

Subtle difference. People "like" WP7. People like and *buy* marmite.

4
0
tirk
Trollface

WP7 does seem a bit "Marmite" doesn't it?

There are those that hate it, and there are those that seem to be being paid to fluff it at every opportunity (there surely can't be any other reason to love WP7, can there?)

10
3

Can Windows 8 bag Microsoft 20 more years at the top?

tirk
Facepalm

"A phone is not a PC... a PC is NOT a phone"

Perhaps MS have decided that the real OS money is in consumer devices (pads & phones), but are failing to sell WP7/Metro as it looks "different" (there are other reasons, but I bet the's what MS thinks!). So get people used to it via the desktop and Win 8, which they will have to use?

0
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Uni plagiarism site buckles under crush of last-minute essays

tirk

Essays on their own are the problem?

There will always be ways of plagiarising if essays alone are used in the internet age, be it wikipedia or essay-writing services. In my day [ ;-)] essays were combinde with tutorials, where you had to demonstrate knowledge of the contents of the essay, and intelligently defend your arguments. But I guess that's too expensive now.

9
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Microsoft unveils Windows 8 'release preview' for June

tirk
FAIL

Launch song?

As Win 95 (which introduced the Start button) used "Start Me Up" by the Sones, should Win 8 (which removes it) use Kylie's "(Can't Start) Giving You Up" perhaps?

7
3

Nokia loses $1.7bn in Q1, sales chief falls overboard

tirk
Trollface

Re: Heading in the right direction

You do reaslise that if you don't post using your own name, you can't claim the marketing dollars, right?

2
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Austrian village considers a F**king name change

tirk
Unhappy

If it's *possible* to be serious about this...

I think it would be a shame. As it is in England where the once common "Gropecunt Lane" has been changed to "Grape Lane"and the like. I think language *should* challenge occasionally, and, yes, cause the odd awkward conversation with children.

9
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Windows 8 diet exposes Microsoft's weak ARM

tirk
Devil

This will be fun - I'll get the popcorn!

Hang on, I work in IT :-(

6
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IBM ringing up retail system biz sale to Toshiba?

tirk
Trollface

Re: Let's hope this isn't the beginning of the end

IBM haven't recently appointed a new CEO who used to work for Microsoft perhaps??

1
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Moody's downgrades Nokia to near-junk status

tirk
Mushroom

WP7? No thanks!

As WP7 can't do something as basic (which all my previous PalmOS, Win6 and current iOS phones can, as well as many Android) as sync via a reliable and secure USB cable with Outlook, why should I downgrade to it?

(Plus the UI looks like it's been designed for my gradmother by Fischer-Price!)

6
3

OnLive goes legit with licensing downshift for virtual Windows

tirk

"Connect to your computer"

(Optionally) went with iOS 5 & iCloud AIUI.

0
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RIM: BlackBerry sales to US gov still on the rise

tirk
WTF?

I don't know which is more sad...

The non-sequitur anti-Apple troll or the madatory thumbs up rating for his rant. The Register really is turning into the smartphone section of Have Your Say (RIP).

2
4

Windows XP support ends two years from now

tirk
FAIL

Re: MS - their own worst enemy.

Metro with a keyboard and mouse is such a @$&!ing disaster that I seriously wonder if MS will be around in 2020 to deliver that support.

1
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tirk
Unhappy

MS - their own worst enemy.

I have to say that Metro/Win8 is what's putting me off upgrading (my small business). Vista was never going to happen, and by the time Win7 was a realistic prospect, the rumours of the horrors of Metro were around. Why move to Win7 when MS are offering no realistic upgrade path beyond it?

I suspect XP will be extended here (again), and non-MS options seriously looked at over the next couple of years. Win7 play a part, but as a stop-gap.

8
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Busted in the US? 'Drop your trousers, sir'

tirk
Unhappy

Nudity

I think that's the point. If they didn't think it was humiliating they'd think of some other way to humiliate and degrade. It's *intended* as extra-judicial punishment IMO.

Nudity and sexual humiliation was prevelant an the Abu Graib photographs remember.

The USA is a scary place to visit these days, flags, people in uniform everywhere, pro-military and patriotic slogans all over the place. I appreciate they feel under attack, but the end result was to make me think of 1930's Europe.

28
2

Sugar content now to be measured in Cadbury Creme Eggs

tirk
Coat

Being pedantic....

(Which of course is the only way to be in such discussions!) the references to "12oz can" and "20oz bottle" are strictly correct, as they are the "standard" sizes. You wouldn't really prefer "354.882355 ml can" and "591.470591 ml bottle" surely??

1
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Vote now for the WORST movie EVER

tirk
Unhappy

Starship Troopers 2

Ugh.

0
0

UK government says no to turbo e-bike

tirk
Mushroom

"I used to regularly set off the SLOW DOWN- 30MPH sign...."

Which is why cycles need number plates, and cyclists insurance and cycling licences, so they can be bought to account for dangerously flouting the law, just like motorised road users.

15
11

With this ring, I thee frag

tirk
Joke

Ahhhhh!

And who said romance is dead?

4
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Cameron's attempt to cram a robot arm wearing a Rolex into his pristine bottom

tirk
Coat

"Meanwhile a huge naval fleet has gathered up top."

Only in the director's cut.

Oh gawd, I'm such a geek :-(

1
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Judge orders O2 to name suspected smut burglars

tirk

Re: Reasonable doubt...

His "nom de guerre" suggests that he doesn't worry too much about the type of publicity he gets, IMO.

I suspect his role in this caper is to be the fall guy the 'chasers hide behind, if it all goes pear-shaped - they've learnt that much from the ACS Law fiasco.

0
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iPhone 5 gets a 5in screen

tirk
Coat

Re: ...and it will be TRIANGULAR!

Edge? Don't you mean RIM??

0
0
tirk
Joke

...and it will be TRIANGULAR!

Said another source, who also worked fro Apple's confuse the opposition cum kite flying department

3
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Why on Earth would you build a closed Android phone?

tirk
Thumb Up

Could be useful to people who work outside in cold weather too, as an alternative to conductive gloves (and when your fingers don't work too accurately either!)

2
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Playboy, Virgin Galactic tout zero-grav nookie in spaaaaace!

tirk
Paris Hilton

Zero gravity sex-suites?

Pity the poor cleaners!

8
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Ten... digital adult toys

tirk
Coat

Re: And what is it makes most of these Digital?

Looks to me that these are replacements for either the old digital method, or what my mum used to call "it".

2
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HP's Whitman suggests Googorola may close Android

tirk
Joke

Re: @Meg: Don't Infringe on Microsoft Patents

IBM claim prior art.

2
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Skype is coming to Windows Phone - really

tirk

Re Yanked from Android, iOS?

But you could only communicate with the small number of other WP7 users. The same argument could (and is) be used for iOS FaceTime, and there are many more iPhone users.

IMO it would be really dumb of MS to pull Skype from other platforms. Being largely platform neutral is it's major adjvantage.

1
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Huawei uncloaks sleek, slim, sexy smartphones

tirk
Facepalm

"30 per cent increase in battery life over competing smartphones"

Maybe they'll make it to lunchtime then.

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