Re: Friends don't let friends install Java.
1) you can't just install a "Java runtime for desktop apps", the only installer also installs the Java browser plugin, which is useless (no legitimate websites I care about use it) and a security nightmare.
These days, most browsers disable this for you. In current Firefox you actually have to jump through hoops if you want to enable a Java applet.
2) an installer that tries to install malware and hijack your home page & search settings whenever it installs a security update, which is regularly.
On Linux, you can go with Openjdk (the Open Source version of Java, actually mostly the same code as Oracle's) which is provided by all major Linux distributions, and gets updated by the distribution's normal update mechanism, no malware added.
Sad if if there is no Windows equivalent. But I have had no trouble for years with the regular Java updater, after learning to un-check the intrusive proposals.