* Posts by dogged

4164 posts • joined 16 Nov 2009

In some ways, dating apps are the anti-internet

dogged
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But women will educate us in what works and once the lesson sinks in that asking 50 random strangers “Hi, wanna jiggy?” doesn't actually work, then our approaches will be tamed down to those that do work.

Except that it almost certainly will work, provided the asker is prepared to continue asking different individuals and not be disheartened by the massed rejections.

I refer Tim to the concept of Broadcast spawning as an analogy and also this classic from Kevin Bloody Wilson (lyrics NSFW - use headphones and try not to snort tea).

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Life after Nokia: Microsoft Lumia 640 budget WinPho blower

dogged
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Re: why

> Why would I want a 120 landfill windows phone that has no apps and costs £60 a year after year one (in addition to mobile contracts of course)

What? It costs £120. Unlocked. You own it from that point and put whatever SIM you want in there (or none).

Where does the £60/year come from? You don't have to renew Office 365.

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dogged
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Re: I don't want.

Google fanboy references "microsofts mighty ad machine".

Film at 11.

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This open-source personal crypto-key vault wants two things: To make the web safer ... and your donations

dogged
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Opt-In

perhaps massive cowards (see above) should be able to opt-in to mass surveillance from GCHQ while those of us who can do maths and realize that we are more likely to be hit by a meteorite twice in an hour than get killed by a terrorist crack on with our lives.

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dogged
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Re: And how long...

You could beat them to it by donating.

I have.

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Radio 4 and Dr K on programming languages: Full of Java Kool-Aid

dogged
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Re: "soi-disant"?

> The vast majority of Java runs on servers, where “write once, run anywhere” is in fact slightly less of a joke.

Fixed.

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dogged
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Re: "soi-disant"?

I think there's a difference between Gamergate and calling someone a female Stephen Fry - ie, an ignorant enthusiast.

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Fancy a wristjob from Tim Cook? TOUGH LUCK, you CAN'T HAVE ONE

dogged
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Gorilla?

No thanks, those gorillas are too strong. Try one of these baboons, They're milder.

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Bulgarian Bill Gates blagger busted, banged up, again: report

dogged
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I'm not about to faff around composing posts in Fiddler, so never mind.

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dogged
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How did you use the old icon?

I've particularly been missing the "Death of the Reg" icon.

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Fraudsters target Nazi Android malware at Russian bank customers

dogged
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Re: Fifth Reich?

> Did I miss the Fourth Reich?

I don't know. Probably not if you're Greek.

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Lib Dems wheel out Digital Rights Bill pledge as election sweetener

dogged
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Re: WTF is a digital sphere?

it's a topological extension of the information superhighway.

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Wanna run Windows 10 Preview on your Lumia? Of course you do. Now 33 mobes supported

dogged
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Re: My 625 is ready

I wouldn't. It's buggy and known to be so. If you don't use the handset as your primary then okay but this isn't "daily driver" material yet by a long way.

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Microsoft's top legal eagle: US cannot ignore foreign privacy laws

dogged
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> Do you really think it's a moral decision on Microsoft's part?

Nope. I think they're pushing privacy as a brand-differentiation, a USP to make customers go with them over, for example, Google. The big G is not so much about privacy, except their own.

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Wi-Fi hotspots can put iPhones into ETERNAL super slow-mo

dogged
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WTF?

Re: I don't really have much sympathy for people who fall for such tricks

So overclocking isn't a thing after all, then?

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dogged
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My favourite was the "waterproof" poster.

https://i.imgur.com/0Fp11mg.jpg

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Apple Watch: We ROUNDUP the ROUNDUPS. Yes, Roundup-squared

dogged
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Re: can't resist

I was thinking more along the lines of -

"We live in a world of marvels and no mistaking it. Oh, some lugubrious fuddy-duddies will always cast swine before pearls, value chaff over wheat and verily render from Caesar what should remain unrendered and that's up to them, my loves, for we few, we happy few, we band of wristband wranglers have been granted joy. Sumptuous joy. Delicious joy. Scrumptulicious joylode as the late Stanley Unwin might have sagaciously opined.

To touch, to stroke, to force-fondle a sparkling glow of machined elysium on the hairy Tartarus of one's clumsy wrist, a joint of little desire, a mere link 'twixt arm and hand without charm or sexuality rendered glorious at one stroke, for stroke it you will.

It is beautiful, this thing. It links to ones iPhone, itself a thing of utter erotic gorgeousness, and it has a battery in it, which is splendid. And even as you caress the Watch (a mere "w" is insufficient, the mighty "W" barely suffices as Sir Jony Ive so rightly decided) so it caresses you back. One caress, two buzzes three throbs.

My wrist throbs for me, and, dear reader, we shall all in turn throb for our wrists".

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dogged
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I think we've been downvoted by Stephen Fry.

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dogged
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Re: Wristjob

My watch is also a Fossil.

Preferred name for this thing is definitely a "jazzbangle" although I don't know why either - it's just a really good word.

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dogged
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Lewis, could you invite Stephen Fry to review it for the Reg?

Because, y'know, funny.

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Eyes on the prize: Ten 23-24-inch monitors for under £150

dogged
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Don't you need a TV license for that?

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dogged
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Speaking of which, the review is sadly silent in which of these (if any) will pivot.

I too used to go for vertical space but eventually spent some tax-deductible capital expense on an Asus PG278Q ROG Swift 27" which at 1440p and 27" doesn't need to pivot.

It does pivot, of course, and at that price you'd bloody hope so too. It just doesn't need to.

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Daniel Radcliffe to feature in GTA biopic flick. Well, it's work at least

dogged
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I saw that short series with Radcliffe and Jon Hamm and was pleasantly surprised to find that both are actually excellent actors.

So this may be worth watching.

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El Reg offers you the chance to become a Master Investor – for free

dogged
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Re: Fail to see the link

Oh, you do NOT get to blame Simon Weston for the failure of his superior officers.

Tell me you didn't go there.

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dogged
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Re: @ dogged

I make no judgements on the type of audience or even Farage himself - I'm just pointing out that he is likely to alienate more prospective applicants than he will attract.

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dogged
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You could probably increase applications by removing the Farage paragraph.

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Microsoft uses Windows Update to force Windows 10 ads onto older PCs

dogged
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Re: Strange

Nobody likes unwanted ads (if that's what this really is).

However, sneaking Win10 onto home users' machines for free would probably be a benefit to everybody.

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Google: Give us cash or we'll poke YouTube ads into your eyeballs

dogged
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I'd pay that, too but only if they also implemented SSL.

Because 2015 people, ffs.

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Bad news everyone: Cybercrime is getting even easier

dogged
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> And yet some of us still manage to keep our operations running and malware free as far as we know

Fixed that for you.

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Operation Redstone: Microsoft preps double Windows update in 2016

dogged
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Stop

Re: Why?

Then I expect the poster is from the future since nobody knows what changes these patch releases will make and nobody will know until a little while before they are released.

If he is indeed from the future then I apologize for my sarcasm. If not, he should maybe stop complaining about things that haven't even happened yet.

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dogged
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Re: Subscription model?

there isn't going to be a subscription model.

Honestly, this is becoming boring. No subscription model. It's patches, service packs and Windows Update.

I am quite amused by the way the prospect is always yelled most loudly by those who take a pride in having nothing to do with Windows anyway presumably in the hope of frightening some gullible idiots into following their lead. This has the obvious benefit that they could then have a bigger market share and thus not have to hope nobody mentions it when they tell you that Blackberry and Windows Phone are useless and crap and evil because they have no market share.

It might take the edge off all that shilling for Chromebooks.

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dogged
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Re: Why?

You don't.

You don't need any revisions at all. Don't upgrade! Upgrades are evil and they mean change and change is always bad. There are no such things as beneficial patches or zero-day flaws or security updates or stability updates. None of those actually exist.

Disable Windows Update. Switch off Windows Defender. Uninstall your AV. Switch off your firewall.

Never update. Never patch. Never upgrade. Because you don't need to because you are just so much BETTER than that!

forfucksweetsakesomanyretards

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Playing by stealth: Twelve gaming headsets to plonk on your noggin

dogged
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But if it sounds good, that's okay, right?

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You. FTC. Get over here. Google is INVADING our children's MINDS – anti-ad campaigners

dogged
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Re: A Clockwork YouTube

I'll do that, too.

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EE springs Wi-Fi phone calls on not-spot sufferers, Tube riders

dogged
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Short version (as most of us know) is that EE + Village == "No signal".

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Don't be stiffed by spies, stand up to Uncle Sam with your proud d**k pics – says Snowden

dogged
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Re: Last Week Tonight on You Tube

da da da da DAA da-da-daaa

(which my head still internally sings as "now it's time for Morecambe and Wise")

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dogged
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Re: Honey Trap

Or a journalist dressed up as a sheikh.

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dogged
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Re: Last Week Tonight on You Tube

London Weekend Television?!?

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Intel shows Google how to stick it real good

dogged
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And some have no souls to begin with.

I could see this being popular with the kind of idiot employer who buys endless horrible HP boxes. Although I note that the default version is supplied with linux, so maybe not.

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South Korea to NUKE Microsoft ActiveX

dogged
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Re: If you thought the browser wars didn't really matter...

> Microsoft paid sites to incorporate incompatibilities into their pages

[citation needed]

And yes, business had to pay for Netscape buy not for IE do corporates coded for IE. Not rocket surgery and why Netscape lost. Also it was shit.

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Bristol’s ‘Smart City’ reserved for boffins. Sorry bumpkins

dogged
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Bristol Is Open!

But not to citizens.

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BT thinks EE customers will FLEE from enlarged four-play mobe biz

dogged
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Churn

I think they might overestimating that risk.

Anyone prepared to tolerate EE's shitty service should be able to swallow BT's equally shitty service.

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Teen pleads guilty in Microsoft and Valve hacking case

dogged
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> Microsoft is allowed to steal (excuse me, use underhanded tricks) to get stuff from others

[citation needed]

Perhaps you were thinking of one of Google's many content-grabs?

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dogged
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Hold on

The DOJ estimates that the business data, code and games the group pilfered from their targets added up to between $100m and $200m.

How did they come to this conclusion? The data was copied, not stolen. None of the companies involved lost anything. Nothing this group did cost those companies anything - one could even argue that they got free pen testing.

So where is this monetary figure coming from?

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dogged
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Re: Options

Valve use linux. They got hacked too.

Shut up.

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Cybercrim told to cough up £1m or spend years in chokey

dogged
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Holmes

and this confiscation order aims to literally make him pay for what he has done," continued DS Azad. "The money will go back into policing and the criminal justice system, helping us continue to put people like Oshodi before the courts."

So it goes to the police. Not the woman he stole it from, then.

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Project Spartan: We get our claws on Microsoft's browser for Windows 10

dogged
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As opposed to your Google-think? Advertise a lie often enough and it'll become popular?

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dogged
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Reported for repost of the same old lies.

Yes, the Bing toolbar sent your search queries to Bing. Just as the Google toolbar sends your search queries to Google.

Go away, "Bob".

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dogged
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Re: One question:

Not in this build, as far as I can see, although there are clues that this will be an option. But if you're in the UK you don't get Cortana (yet) anyway.

All the "this is not the browser we're looking for" crowd might consider waiting until it's out of alpha-preview before making that call. Oh wait, MS product, of course they won't.

I'll probably stick with Firefox out of habit anyway.

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