* Posts by Daedalus

198 posts • joined 15 Oct 2009

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30,000 people buy a box of BOVINE EXCREMENT

Daedalus

Grot!

Wonder if the MD of CAH has the last name "Perrin" ?

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LOHAN's Plucky Playmonaut touches down at Spaceport America

Daedalus

Re: You sure must love driving

Nope, whatever the video was, the article clearly implied that the drive started in Denver.

Speaking of ABQ, one of the greatest views on the planet is available at the end of the cable car from downtown to Sandia Peak.

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Daedalus

You sure must love driving

Next time fly into Albuquerque or El Paso and save yourself the drive. Seriously, dude!

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I'll be back (and forward): Hollywood's time travel tribulations

Daedalus
Terminator

Where did all you zombies come from?`

"Predestination", a relatively faithful embellishment of Heinlein's beautifully twisted (and daring for its time) story "All you zombies..." is about to be released.

Clearly somebody nipped into the future to plant this story so it would be possible to slip in a plug for the movie.

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Get a job in Germany – where most activities are precursors to drinking

Daedalus

Need the Idiot Indices

When considering another country it's always good to know how many ID10T's you will encounter and of what type.

Blithering Bureaucrats - all form and no substance

Grinning Idiots - everything's OK as long as everybody is happy.

Climbers - they've got your back, 'cos they are stepping on it to get higher

Panickers - promoted beyond their competence, they jump all over their subordinates because that's all they know how to do.

Sales Droids - nuff said.

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Will.i.am gets CUFFED as he announces his new wristjob, the PULS

Daedalus

Bling bling

I always thought the hip-hop style was big, gold, and worn around the neck.

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'I went from a two-hour commute to a 10-min scooter ride by the sea'

Daedalus

Warm blue waters?

Blue maybe. Warmer than the UK or much of the US definitely. But not always warm (sub 15 C for at least half the year) and prone to Portuguese Man'o'War plagues.

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Activist investors DESTROY COMPANIES. Don't get me started on share dealings...

Daedalus

@Steve the Cynic

Excellent rebuttal. Right on point. You left out a bit though. It's the bit that goes:

"If you're not a shareholder then what companies and shareholders do is none of your bloody business"

Having said all that, as someone who encounters people running and working for tech companies on a regular basis, all I can say is I'm amazed at what a bunch of clueless chair-warmers most of them are!

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What’s the KEYBOARD SHORTCUT for Delete?! Look in a contextual menu, fool!

Daedalus

Pity the poor drones

Software gets designeritis. Too many functions included only to please marketeers and sales droids. It's the Xerox Syndrome, the creation of full featured gadgets that get used for one thing only most of the time. At least Xerox knew about the importance of the Big Green Button.

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Oh God the RUBBER on my SHAFT has gone wrong and is STICKING to things

Daedalus

Bodge and run!

If you happen to be a roving consultant of no fixed abode and you work for a well-known TLA company (no, not the obvious one) that specializes in DB type applications that users can theoretically use to, oh, look up documents and fetch the latest version, you can get away with GUI's so bad they would be thrown out by even the sozzled sots in the boardroom.

And the funny thing is, the bigger the client and the more you charge, the less likely you are to be called back after you run for the exit.

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Home Depot: 56 million bank cards pwned by malware in our tills

Daedalus

Its not the replacement credit cards...

... It's having to change all my online accounts that's th real pain.

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Bono: Apple will sort out monetising music where the labels failed

Daedalus

You can all join in!

Remember that sampler album from Island Records? The one whose cover photo showed all the musicians featured on it? Well, that's about how many stand to benefit from the latest wave of "new tech" music. What the recording industry achieved in the second half of the 20th cent. was to create a way for a few people to get very rich indeed (along with various executives and media functionaries, with or without Hawaiian shirts) while leaving the rest to fight over the scraps and aspire to a place feeding from the trough. Bono's messianic pronouncements are the tail end of the dying of that business model. For 99.999% of active musicians, nothing will change.

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NASA said a 60ft space alien menacing Earth wouldn't harm us: Tell THAT to Nicaragua

Daedalus
Boffin

107,200

That's the distance, in km, that the Earth moves every hour. So the two rocks had to be at least ~1.3 million km apart. So yes, they had nothing at all to do with each other.

Just shows that government press people are dim as the old NAAFI candle.

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Vote NOW for LOHAN's arboreal avoidance algorithm acronym

Daedalus

Been there done that...

...and noticed the amazing lack of trees in the US desert southwest. Perhaps rock avoidance is needed instead?

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One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot

Daedalus

Just wait until...

...some guy accidentally falls into it.

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Banking apps: Handy, can grab all your money... and RIDDLED with coding flaws

Daedalus

Drones will be drones

The latest way of ensuring poor software quality is to suck everybody into compliance review meetings, or make them work on compliance documents that nobody reads before going into review meetings, which then consist of interminable sessions of dealing with irrelevant questions from people who shouldn't even be there, let alone causing unnecessary distractions.

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This is how I set about making a fortune with my own startup

Daedalus

Re: What's in a name

If Damon is really Adam's son, then Lordy be I may have met him many years ago back when A H-D was working for YTV and complaining about not being able to mention the word "molecule" on air. Got invited to sup, don't you know. Wasn't invited back!

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Daedalus

Nothing Duff about this guy

Don't underestimate the effect of the name "Hart-Davis" in getting yourself heard....

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Brookhaven boffins boggle at baryons

Daedalus

It's hard to fault the Reg hacks, because the BNL release doesn't do a very good job of getting the pertinent facts up front. The known strange baryons do get a mention, but the release doesn't make the point that higher mass (i.e. higher energy) versions can exist as well as the ground states, just as an atom can be excited to higher states. I don't like the "freezing point" analogy at all. Better they should have said that the "temperature" at which ordinary hadrons melt into quark-gluon plasma is lower that it otherwise would be.

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Nuts to your poncey hipster coffees, I want a TESLA ELECTRO-CAFE

Daedalus

Re: It's good not to be back

STYWKO

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Daedalus

It's good not to be back

Reading Dabbsy's tales of woe confirms that all the reasons I had for decamping 30 years ago are still in place. And they don't even speak English in central London anymore! Come visit any city in the northern half of the US, Al, and you can get a steaming cup of Joe with a smile (and free refills in some places). But don't forget to tip!

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World's only flyable WWII Lancaster bombers meet in Lincs

Daedalus

Lucky me

I have actually been on board the Canadian Lanc, and I didn't have to pre-book or stand in line for hours either! Ah the joys of living in an undercrowded country! And add in a B-17, B-24, and a B-25. And a Canuck Avro Anson...

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Americans to be guinea pigs in vast chip-and-PIN security experiment

Daedalus

50 ways to love your lever

The USA does it differently, sometimes 50 times differently. It's not long since banks were local to states, or in some cases counties within a state. The US govt. can't always crack the whip to enforce one way of doing everything, even if it wants to. Sometimes the best it can do is promote a common model for everybody to work from. So if we appear to be behind the times relative to those in electoral dictatorships, bear with us.

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Report: American tech firms charge Britons a thumping nationality tax

Daedalus

This is not new...

Let's face it, for a long time not many people ever got a chance to compare US and UK prices. I did, starting back in 1980. The rule was simple: take the price in dollars, replace dollar sign with pound sign, that's the price in the UK. It applied mostly to electronics where you could compare like with like in the brand dept, even with Radio Shack/Tandy and their Realistic lines.

Back then I simply blamed the UK commercial structure: monopoly monopoly monopoly. Limited suppliers, limited retailers, controlled imports.

Sounds like not much has changed.

Anybody remember Comet, with their "we'll advertise it but we may not have it" policies?

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Why has sexy Apple gone to bed with big boring IBM?

Daedalus

Re: In a world...

Just for fun I pasted the article into Word and ran the checker. A lot of tech-ese got flagged, as you might expect, including iPhone etc. The "three" didn't get flagged directly but the adjacent verb "exists" was flagged for inconsistency with "here three". Certain dangling phrases were caught, as were Mr. Clarke's neologisms. Maybe the last items, all too frequent on the Reg, were the reason for not bothering to run a checker.

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Daedalus

In a world...

...where spell checking is built into everything but the fridge, you'd thing taht three would be no possibility of publishing an article that mis-spelled "that" and "there".

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Hi-tech Fagin couple used Apple scam cash to fly pickpockets to UK

Daedalus

Pity they didn't live on...

...Mornington Crescent

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When the robot rebellion comes, this Jibo droid will BORE you to death

Daedalus

I have heard the future

And it sounds like David Sedaris.

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Google's Pankhurst doodle doo-doo shows the perils of using Google to find stuff out

Daedalus

In memoriam

So farewell Emily Pankhurst

You were born

on the 14th or 15th

of July or some other month

and your name was Goulden

but my friend Keith's friend Adam's Mum

says you were born on Bastille day

(whenever that is)

and Keith's Mum says she's an expert.

- E.J. Thribb (59 1/2)

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German spy agency staffer spied for NSA during gov probe into NSA spying – report

Daedalus

On the dropping of trousers

"Letting down your trousers" is an old German espionage expression for revealing yourself as a spy. But that doesn't mean you tell the truth about who you are working for. Maybe this guy thought he had been recruited by the Yanks, but there's a good chance his intel went elsewhere. There is actually no way for the Germans to prove - short of getting pictures of him handing stuff to Embassy staff - that he was actually working for the USA.

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HESS-II scope spots its first pulsar

Daedalus

Oh dear

HESS is not a radio telescope. It's a Cherenkov radiation detector, which means it picks up a flash of light when a gamma ray dumps its energy in the high atmosphere. See https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/IACT

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Amazon offers Blighty's publishing industry 'assisted suicide'

Daedalus

Poor little publishers!!

In times gone by, the "Net Book Agreement" allowed UK publishers and booksellers to collude and fix prices. It lasted in some form or other till the 90's! Look it up.

So when the bigger bully comes along and beats up the flabby old bully, it's hard to feel sympathy for either side. And remember that W H Smugg is known for putting the screws on publishers and authors, so not much changes.

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BBC: Bumpkins, hobbits need fairer coverage

Daedalus

It ain't just the yokels in the UK...

BBC reporters in the US routinely pontificate on US matters while sitting in cafes in NYC, DC, LA or various other acronymic cities far from the actual events taking place in ND, SD, TX etc.

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Expulsion from Garden of Steven: Apple staffers tossed out of Fruit Loop

Daedalus

Re: They can't all be engineers and designers

The trouble is that finance, marketing, and admin, the political heart of the corporation, tend to cluster around the fireplace and shunt the productive people to the cold parts of the room. Fruit Loop Central will therefore be where powerful people do nothing worthwhile except pursue their own interests.

This is where Apple becomes Just Another Big Corporation.

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Activist investors try forcing Google to pay more taxes

Daedalus
Thumb Down

Classic nonsense

1. Buy one share of company (or however many the company bylaws require to put up a shareholder proposal)

2. File controversial proposal.

3. Bask in glow of publicity.

4. Achieve nothing else.

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WTF is NET NEUTRALITY, anyway? And how can we make everything better?

Daedalus

Pretty standard, but don't blame the FCC. It's the local govt officials who granted these monopolies. Most of the "broadband" providers are still cable TV providers using their original lines. The monopolies were granted in the 70's.

The main choice just about anywhere is cable broadband or ISDN with the phone company.

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Please work for nothing, Mr Dabbs. What can you lose?

Daedalus
Childcatcher

The answer is yes, and...

...this is what it will cost.

Consultants are told that the answer to a client inquiry is always the above.

Perhaps Mr. Dabbs should say "Yes, and every two minutes I will be running a video commercial for Millett's Milky Marvels. I will also have a crawl running along the bottom of the screen promoting online gambling."

That way the talk will be as "free" as a typical web page.

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Target finally implements chip and PIN card protections

Daedalus
FAIL

Meet the new cards...

...same as the old cards.

Just got a new card here in the USA, and..

Yes!

We have no

Chip contacts

We have no chip contacts today!

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And! For! Yahoo!'s next! trick! ... Making! two! new! TV! comedies!

Daedalus
Unhappy

Misfits in another universe?

Smeg! That sounds familiar!

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Apple stuns world with rare SEVEN-way split: What does that mean?

Daedalus
Devil

The last seven-way split I heard of....

...was Voldemort's soul.

Ya know, that might explain this....

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Slip your finger in this ring and unlock your backdoor, phone, etc

Daedalus

Gives a whole new meaning to...

...giving somebody a ring sometime.

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Is tech the preserve of the young able-bodied? Let's talk over a fine dinner and claret

Daedalus

What happened to contrast?

Even the most sharp eyed have to find grey text on a white background hard to read. And don't get me started on light blue text.

Oops, here's the Reg using grey text...

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Did a date calculation bug just cost hard-up Co-op Bank £110m?

Daedalus

Not the programmers fault!!

Too many companies roll out software without dry runs and offline testing. It's Co-op's fault all the way!

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Raised £350bn in crowdsourced funding? Tell me about it (not)

Daedalus

Re: 沖縄国際映画祭 日本語 メールニュース

@Cynic: very nice. Now I know what "May-Ru Ni-Yu-Su" is a mangling of.

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Daedalus

Re: 沖縄国際映画祭 日本語 メールニュース

And indeed he is not. The first "word" is indeed to be found as the title of the Japanese Wikipedia article on said festival.

We will now contemplate the awesomeness of having readers of Reg, and Dabbsie in particular, who also read Japanese...

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Daedalus

Re: 沖縄国際映画祭 日本語 メールニュース

The second and third words are respectively "Ni hon go", meaning "Japanese language" and "Me-Ru-Ni-Yu-Su", meaning unknown. Just in case this guy is having us on....

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The plot to kill Google cloud: We'll rename Windows Azure to MICROSOFT Azure

Daedalus

Blue sky thinking

Only Microsoft would name a cloud product with a word usually used to describe a clear blue sky!

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Inmarsat: Doppler effect helped 'locate' MH370

Daedalus
Boffin

It's got a beat!

You make the mistake of thinking that a frequency shift of 8 parts per 10,000 is somehow difficult to detect. In fact it's easy because, when combined with the reference signal, you get a difference signal in the megahertz range. That's what makes good old British fine-you-for-1-mph-over radar work. The effect is exactly the same as the one that creates "beats" when two musical notes that are close in frequency sound together.

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GRAV WAVE TSUNAMI boffinry BONANZA – the aftershock of the universe's Big Bang

Daedalus
FAIL

Correction, Mr. T

Inflation doesn't explain why we have detected temperature differences. It explains why the temperature of the universe is uniform (that's "no differences") in all directions.

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Relief when urine trouble becomes latest capacity-sharing service

Daedalus

Lirpa loof strikes again.

Is it April already?

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