* Posts by Valerion

404 posts • joined 12 Oct 2009

Page:

DVLA misses out on £400m in tax after scrapping paper discs

Valerion

Lower tax cars

Also, the more newer cars that are sold, the lower the take because newer ones are generally better than older ones.

Case in point, my wife has gone from paying almost £300 per year to paying £0 after she changed her car. Although we still have to go an register for the tax and go through the whole process, all to be charged nothing which seems a waste of time.

2
0

UK IT consultant subject to insane sex ban order mounts legal challenge

Valerion

Ironic

He has to tell the plod of any planned sexual activity, but they are able to fuck him over continuously.

33
0

What's Brexit? How Tech UK tore up its plans after June 23

Valerion

Re: Histrionics

I am still shocked and horrified. It feels like being on a plane when 52% of the passengers vote to turn off the engines having been promised it will be okay if they do.

It's not even that. It's more like being on a plane when only 75% of the passengers actually bothered to vote, a great number of the passengers don't have long to live anyway, the 16-18 year olds were excluded from voting, and in the end only 37% of the passengers actually voted to turn off the engines, but we've all gotta die anyway.

10
2

All you need for quantum computing at room temperature is some mothballs

Valerion

I consider myself a fairly intelligent chap

Then I read about people who do this sort of thing, and realise that I am, in comparison, a complete gibbering idiot.

11
0

Uber opens up on Oz deactivation policies, just a little

Valerion

Bribery?

If they get kicked off for falling below a minimum star rating, doesn't that open them up to bribery from customers?

"I'll only give you a 5-star review if you give me $5, otherwise it's a 1 star".

3
0

Researcher pops locks on keylogger, finds admin's email inbox

Valerion

Re: Located or Accessed?

Perhaps the address was a giveaway?

hawkeye_finaldestination@gmail.com or something would be sufficient to suggest it's the final step. If it was johnsmith9999@gmail.com then perhaps not!

0
0

Chatbot lawyer shreds $2.5m in parking tickets

Valerion

Can it be re-purposed?

To overturn referendum results?

1
0

Parliament takes axe to 2nd EU referendum petition

Valerion

Re: wtf?

You know, not all British Citizens actually live in Britain.

11
1

Quick note: Brexit consequences for IT

Valerion

European HQs

I suspect Dublin will do very nicely out of all of this.

31
1

IT consultant gets 4 years' porridge for tax fraud

Valerion

Re: Cost benefit analysis

You need to take into account potential future earnings, which are now undoubtedly diminished with his criminal record.

5
0

Sea of outrage after 'migrant-spotting app' turned out to be bogus

Valerion

Even if it was "working", what use would it be?

It kind of assumes every boat is a migrant boat. Rather than just, say, a boat.

Scrambling the navy every time someone spots a boat wouldn't be particularly efficient.

3
0

BOFH: Follow the paper trail

Valerion

My Inlaws

Used to run a business in Malaysia, selling printer ribbons to offices.

Theirs were not the cheapest (far from it), or the best, but they they made a fortune. The reason being they would send vouchers - redeemable at most local stores - to the low-paid office-workers buying the things for their company. The workers liked the vouchers a lot. So they bought a lot of ribbons, leading to many of them having enormous stockpiles of things.

4
0

Boffins decipher manual for 2,000-year-old Ancient Greek computer

Valerion

Re: Trouble figuring out how it worked?

They were on hold to the outsourced support line for the past 2000 years.

9
0

Developer waits two years for management to define project

Valerion

Re: My story is this...

Quite normal. I once had to do a project. The CEO (a total asshat) asked how long it would take. I said 6 months, conservatively. He said you have 3. I said no, it'll take 6. He said it WILL be done in 3.

Fast forward 2 months and they finally iron out the contracts and I'm allowed to start. And, of course, I now have 1 month to do it. At the end of the month I was off on holiday.

He told me I couldn't go. I basically said well I'm going, fire me when I get back if you want and off I went. I didn't get fired and he didn't get his project finished to his timescales either. In the end, with a lot of work and a very reduced set of testing, we got it done in about 5 months IIRC.

14
0

Computerised stock management? Nah, let’s use walkie-talkies

Valerion

DABBSY - THEY HAVE BEEN LISTENING!

I was unfortunate enough to visit one of their stores on the weekend, and witnessed a customer approach a member of staff, hand them a shoe, ask if they had it in a size 9, and then He scanned it with some form of device, and it told him they were in stock!! .

I was shocked.

Dabbsy - your reach is large and quick.

^^^ Not a euphamism.

0
0
Valerion

Wide feet, no arches

That's me. Finding shoes is a real PITF.

My usual gambit these days is to order several styles and sizes from Sole Trader online, try them all on, find the one that fits and take the rest back into the nearest store for a refund. The bonus being that you tend to get the Quidco applied to the entire initial purchase still, thus reducing the cost of the pair you actually keep (hey it's not my fault their systems are not joined up enough!).

FWIW, I've found Cat quite good for width and flatness. For trainers, try Sweatshop. They will stick you on a treadmill, film your feet in slow-motion and recommend you trainers that are actually what you need, and bring you out many styles and sizes to try on.

3
0

The least stressful job in the US? Information security analyst, duh

Valerion

Re: What a coincidence!

How long did your coma last?

It's pronounced comb-over

1
0

Smartwatches: I hate to say ‘I told you so’. But I told you so.

Valerion

Re: Watch navigation by re-purposing the hands

"It's either quarter to nine or I need to turn left."

Or, indeed, both.

3
0

HR botches redundancy so chap scores year-long paid holiday

Valerion

I had the summer off once

They put about 20 of us "at risk" in the early noughties. That meant we were supposed to come to the office, but didn't have to do any work and were allowed time out for interviews etc. Due to a clause in my contract my place of employment was listed as my home, so I showed up in my lounge every day for 6 weeks.

Then I went in for my exit interview/form-signing/here's-your-payoff-meeting to be told that someone had resigned last night and they could keep one person and they wanted to keep me and move me to a proper software development role to fill the role that was now vacant. I said that all the jobs I'd been looking at were paying more than I was on. They said to give them a week and they'd get me an offer.

At the end of the week they came back with a £5k pay increase and told me to report back in in another week. All told I had about 2 months off on full pay, and then went back to a higher salary and a more interesting job.

7
0

In-flight movies via BYOD? Just what I always wan... argh no we’re all going to die!

Valerion

Bandwith worries me

I'm doing one of these BYOD flights in a couple of months. What worries me (1st world problems) is the bandwidth.

Assuming that it's only SD not HD, that's still about 2Mb/s per stream. And assuming 300 passengers, that's 600Mb/s (I'm good at maths, me).

What kind of wifi can support that?? Or will, as I am wearily expecting, the experience be utterly shit resulting in 9 hours of Kevin Bacon-style "Buffer face"?

0
0

Microsoft phone support contractors told to hang up after 15 minutes

Valerion

Ah the memories

I used to do phone support for a venerable ISP/Online Service back in the 90s. We had a 6-minute deadline and got hassled by supervisors if we went over. Eventually I became a supervisor and was able to do the hassling myself. Oh the power (at 18 years of age!).

The best trick was, when it was quite (which was rarely), if you flicked your phone into "I'm busy, don't give me any calls" mode (used for when typing up notes following a call) and then back to available you'd end up at the back of the available agents queue. So with no waiting calls, just do that every few minutes and hours would pass with no need to speak to a customer.

0
0

Inside Electric Mountain: Britain's biggest rechargeable battery

Valerion

Went there a couple of years ago

I loved the tour, the wife and kids were not quite so impressed. Damn non-geeks.

The cafe served some very nice cake if I remember correctly.

4
0

Lyft, Uber throw Texas-sized tantrum over Austin driver law

Valerion

Change in opinion?

Not too many months ago on here, it was like:

Taxi Firms? Boo!

Uber? Yay!

Seems to have reversed now.

2
0

Wi-Fi network named 'mobile detonation device' grounds plane

Valerion

The tale of 3 twats

1 - The person who did it (although there's a chance they were not on the plane, or where on the plane and one of their mates did it for a laugh without them knowing).

2 - The captain delaying the flight for it.

3 - The people who demanded to get off thus causing further delays.

9
1

China's Dalek-like robots fear only one terrifying nemesis: Stairs

Valerion

Design

Looks like a standard light fitting:

http://www.stylewithin.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/pendant.jpg

0
0

Pebble axes quarter of its workers after fitness pivot

Valerion

Not suprising

Kind of a shame though.

I backed the original Pebble and the Pebble Time Steel, but neither have been great. They've been good, but just not great. The first Pebble had a very glitchy screen. The PTS I have now has a great screen, but frequently does not give me notifications - and that's what I mainly use it for (apart from telling the time, natch). The supposed Gorilla Glass has scratched a LOT (and I've been fairly careful). No other watch I have owned has scratched at all really. Also, it frequently has to be reset and re-paired and the firmware updated.

I like smartwatches, and I admire the way Pebble pretty much started the industry, but when the Apple Watch V2 comes out, I'll probably switch to that.

2
0

Your money or your life! Another hospital goes down to ransomware

Valerion

That's because Ibuprofen is prescription-only in the USA

CVS, Walgreens, Walmart etc all sell it in packs of 500.

0
0

'Microsoft Office has been the bane of my life, while simultaneously keeping me employed'

Valerion

Load bearing breakpoint

Came across one today very similar to the VBA one above.

When stepping through the code it worked, when run normally it didn't. Took me a while to track down that it was reading a DB value that was updated in one scope that hadn't quite updated fully, and due to the read uncommitted isolation level, I was still picking up the old value.

6
0

NatWest tightens online banking security after hacks' 'hack' exposé

Valerion

Better than Barclays

We tried to change the phone number on my wife's Natwest account the other day, but it won't let you without a card-reader.

Compare this to Barclays, who allow it to be changed at will. This happened to my daughter a couple of months ago. Account hacked, £3000 taken. Barclay's were hopelessly incompetent at sorting it out. No communication and they never gave us any details on how it happened. They tried to blame her of course saying we must have a virus on the computer. We all use Macs with AV installed. I ran multiple Malware scans - nothing. No phishing either.

Because they changed the phone number, she got no alerts. And after reporting it and giving them the correct number, the fraud team kept trying to reach her on the number belonging to the thieving scum! Beggars belief...

Eventually she got it back, but she's leaving Barclay's obviously...

1
0

Alice, Bob and Verity, too. Yeah, everybody's got a story, pal

Valerion

Re: tl; dr

I'm assuming the proof reader is still hungover from the weekend.

0
0

California methane well leak filled a Rose Bowl a day

Valerion

Re: New Wembley, of course.

An Imperial Wembley sounds like a bowel problem.

No, an Imperial Wembley sounds like a 1960s sports car.

"Ah yes, I had an Imperial Wembley once, replaced it with a Jenson Interceptor".

4
0

Apple fires legal salvo at FBI for using All Writs law in iPhone brouhaha

Valerion

GovtOS?

Surely FBiOS would be a more suitable name?

2
0

Hello, Kotlin: Another programming language for JVM and JavaScript

Valerion

Eh?

Sounds to me like they've invented C#

0
0

Sir Clive Sinclair in tech tin-rattle triumph

Valerion

Wake me up

When a C64 equivalent arrives. :)

3
7

Adobe issues patch to nix its Mac-killing Creative Cloud update

Valerion

Yev from Backblaze here -> The data was being deleted from Mac user's drives, not Backblaze drives. Also Backblaze user's backups were not affected, just a Backblaze file on the drive.

Can I just give a thumbs-up to Blackbaze for keeping their customers informed? Many places would try and sweep it under the carpet or ignore the issue because it was caused by someone else.

Yet again Backblaze makes me thankful that I am a customer!

0
0

Virgin posts increase in profits and sales amid 900 jobs chop

Valerion

They lost me, too. The continual price-rises finally got to me. I usually worked around it by saying I was going to leave and getting a discount for a while, but this time I just ditched the TV altogether. Most watching is NowTV (which actually has Sky Atlantic) and Netflix anyway. Freeview fills in most of the gaps.

I kept the broadband (ultimately theirs is better) but reduced my spend by about £40 p/m. A month in and I haven't missed it once.

0
0

Big, fat fail? Here's how to avoid that: Microservices and you

Valerion

Re: There is no silver bullet

Service Oriented Architectures do work well in my experience, but making everything stateless isn't a solution when you need transactional integrity, as all systems writing data to a database do.

This is indeed the problem. The other trend I'm seeing now is each microservice to store data pertaining to that service in its own database. Which is fine, until you need to do something transactionally across multiple services, i.e. create an order and update the user's account at the same time.

So what ends up happening is someone writes an orchestration layer that wraps up calls to those individual services in a transaction-friendly way, but by then you're pretty much back to what you started with 5 years ago.

Overall though I do like the idea of microservices, especially the easy-release cycle that it allows. But - as every single poster has correctly pointed out - it does NOT negate the need for proper integration testing!

2
0

Getting a grip on Puppet: A guide for beginners

Valerion

Metallica

Now I'm going to have Master of Puppets stuck in my head all day.

1
0

Oracle issues emergency patch for Java on Windows

Valerion

Re: Out, damned spot! Out, I say!

Minecraft demands it, too.

6
1

Lincolnshire council shuts down all IT after alleged 0-day breach

Valerion

Not a breach

Someone retrieved a record and selected the "also retrieve records of relatives" box. Bingo - every single record returned.

Disclaimer - my family hails from Lincolnshire.

22
0

Boeing just about gives up on the 747

Valerion

Re: So long old friend

Yeah it was always fun getting a close up look at the Cockpit. I guess they don't do that anymore though. But, yes those were the days!

Capt. Oveur: Have you ever been in a plane cockpit before?

Joey: No, sir.

Capt. Oveur: Ever seen a grown man naked?

3
0

El Reg mulls entering Robot Wars arena

Valerion

So glad this is coming back

Flicking through the upper echelons of TV channels the other day with my 10 year old boy and came across a re-run. He was instantly hooked and when I said it was coming back he asked if we could go. A quick Google revealed the on-going tour (I had no idea that was a thing!) would be visiting somewhere not too far away from us in the summer. 2 minutes later and tickets were booked.

Can't wait!

2
0

Microservices are not the same thing as components

Valerion

IMHO

You can use microservices instead of components.

Microservices may well use components.

2
0

Kiwi judge rules Kim Dotcom can be extradited to USA

Valerion

Re: "Don't tell him your name Pike!.....er...Kim!"

And then presumably the defendants were slapped with Contempt of Court, and possibly Perjury charges?

3
1

UK ISP Sky to make smut an opt-in service from 2016

Valerion

Re: Hope the filter lists are better than Virgin Mobile

When I phoned up to get it switched off, I was asked "what are the URLs of the sites you're trying to view"!

I'm surprised they don't block anything with "Virgin" in it anyway!

2
0

DEAD MAN'S SOCKS and other delightful gifts from clients

Valerion

Forced to share...

Got sent a nice hamper one year by our parent company, as a thanks for a ton of work I'd done for them that just happened to go live shortly beforehand. Emphatically NOT a Xmas pressie, but a "thanks for getting the site live" pressie.

But of course because it was just before Xmas my boss didn't want it to look like I was getting stuff that nobody else was, so made me share it out.

0
0

Former Sugar babe of Viglen fame set for Chrimbo exit

Valerion

>>“I’ve been running Alan Sugar’s companies for the last 25 years, and that’s why I know a little bit about technology,”

What a wonderful sentence. One could spend hours thinking about the possible interpretations.

<<

Indeed, I was thinking:

I’ve been running Alan Sugar’s companies for the last 25 years, and that’s why I know a little bit - and only a little bit - about technology,

0
0

'Dear Daddy...' Max Zuckerberg’s Letter back to her Father

Valerion

Re: 'Dear Daddy...'

It was 99% of his shares... I don't know if that was actually "the 99% remaining after he'd given 50% of them to the kid".

4
3

Competition watchdog dismisses plans by TfL to uber-regulate Uber

Valerion

$50bn is its market valuation, not its turnover. I suspect its profit is fairly small.

4
0

IT pros are a bunch of wedding and funeral-dodging sickos

Valerion

I missed my OWN funeral

Yep, dropped dead Monday evening, but got an urgent call from the boss demanding I come in anyway to fix a problem.

Three years later and I'm still undead.

13
0

Page:

Forums