* Posts by Valerion

367 posts • joined 12 Oct 2009

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Getting a grip on Puppet: A guide for beginners

Valerion

Metallica

Now I'm going to have Master of Puppets stuck in my head all day.

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Oracle issues emergency patch for Java on Windows

Valerion

Re: Out, damned spot! Out, I say!

Minecraft demands it, too.

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Lincolnshire council shuts down all IT after alleged 0-day breach

Valerion

Not a breach

Someone retrieved a record and selected the "also retrieve records of relatives" box. Bingo - every single record returned.

Disclaimer - my family hails from Lincolnshire.

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Boeing just about gives up on the 747

Valerion

Re: So long old friend

Yeah it was always fun getting a close up look at the Cockpit. I guess they don't do that anymore though. But, yes those were the days!

Capt. Oveur: Have you ever been in a plane cockpit before?

Joey: No, sir.

Capt. Oveur: Ever seen a grown man naked?

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El Reg mulls entering Robot Wars arena

Valerion

So glad this is coming back

Flicking through the upper echelons of TV channels the other day with my 10 year old boy and came across a re-run. He was instantly hooked and when I said it was coming back he asked if we could go. A quick Google revealed the on-going tour (I had no idea that was a thing!) would be visiting somewhere not too far away from us in the summer. 2 minutes later and tickets were booked.

Can't wait!

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Microservices are not the same thing as components

Valerion

IMHO

You can use microservices instead of components.

Microservices may well use components.

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Kiwi judge rules Kim Dotcom can be extradited to USA

Valerion

Re: "Don't tell him your name Pike!.....er...Kim!"

And then presumably the defendants were slapped with Contempt of Court, and possibly Perjury charges?

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UK ISP Sky to make smut an opt-in service from 2016

Valerion

Re: Hope the filter lists are better than Virgin Mobile

When I phoned up to get it switched off, I was asked "what are the URLs of the sites you're trying to view"!

I'm surprised they don't block anything with "Virgin" in it anyway!

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DEAD MAN'S SOCKS and other delightful gifts from clients

Valerion

Forced to share...

Got sent a nice hamper one year by our parent company, as a thanks for a ton of work I'd done for them that just happened to go live shortly beforehand. Emphatically NOT a Xmas pressie, but a "thanks for getting the site live" pressie.

But of course because it was just before Xmas my boss didn't want it to look like I was getting stuff that nobody else was, so made me share it out.

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Former Sugar babe of Viglen fame set for Chrimbo exit

Valerion

>>“I’ve been running Alan Sugar’s companies for the last 25 years, and that’s why I know a little bit about technology,”

What a wonderful sentence. One could spend hours thinking about the possible interpretations.

<<

Indeed, I was thinking:

I’ve been running Alan Sugar’s companies for the last 25 years, and that’s why I know a little bit - and only a little bit - about technology,

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'Dear Daddy...' Max Zuckerberg’s Letter back to her Father

Valerion

Re: 'Dear Daddy...'

It was 99% of his shares... I don't know if that was actually "the 99% remaining after he'd given 50% of them to the kid".

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Competition watchdog dismisses plans by TfL to uber-regulate Uber

Valerion

$50bn is its market valuation, not its turnover. I suspect its profit is fairly small.

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IT pros are a bunch of wedding and funeral-dodging sickos

Valerion

I missed my OWN funeral

Yep, dropped dead Monday evening, but got an urgent call from the boss demanding I come in anyway to fix a problem.

Three years later and I'm still undead.

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What the world needs now is Pi, sweet $5 Raspberry Pi Zero

Valerion

When I were a lad

I used to look forward to when Zzap 64 had a free game demo on a cassette on the magazine.

As a young teenager I looked forward to the floppy disk on Computer Shopper, and as an older teenager, the CD-ROM on the cover of PCW.

Today you can get a magazine with an entire computer included.

<shakes head incredulously>

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Blocking out the Sun won't fix climate change – but it could buy us time

Valerion

Remind me why cold is good and warm is bad?

If our choice is things warming up and some low-level land getting flooded - with the side effect of excellent plant growth for food, or things going freezing putting much of the entire planet under ice - with the side effect of being unable to grow food and humanity starving to death, I know which I'd choose.

Also need to say that "deniers" and "believers" are not scientific words, so I don't know why they get used in scientific debate.

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ISIS operates a crypto help desk – report

Valerion

Re: I'm sure they also have garages..

.. which repair cars they drive around in, so let's just ban everyone with a beard from having a car.

I'd just ban everyone with a beard* full stop. Then we'd get rid of hipsters, too.

*Except Santa. My kids would never forgive me.

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Why was the modem down? Let us count the ways. And phone lines

Valerion

Ah, the 90s

Used to do tech support at Compuserve as my first job out of school. Everyone's favourite line when they couldn't fix it was: "Right, well that should be ok now. If you can just hang up and try again.", thus forcing the poor customer to get off the line, find out it still didn't work and then call back back and sit in another 45 minute queue to get through to someone else. Hopefully someone else in a different call centre.

Then of course the worst line to hear in reply was: "No need, I've got a second line for the modem." as dreams of getting a lunch break and keeping your call time under the allocated 6 minutes disappeared...

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TalkTalk: Hackers may have nicked personal, banking info on 4 million Brits

Valerion

Was this a hack or a DDOS

I'm confused by the reports of what's happened. Was this a DDOS or a hack?

Frankly, it sounds like a DDOS. Quite possibly one of those ransom attempts that seem popular these days. That would not result in data being taken, just in the site being offline.

If you are hacking to actually steal customer data, you do not flood the site with traffic*, but rather would try and sneak in undetected. If the data is exposed by the front end (which is unlikely but possible if there was some kind of SQL Injection vuln or something) then flooding the front-end with traffic is just going to make it unavailable for the hack, also.

So I'm a bit puzzled.

*I admit there is a chance it was a diversion.

1
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NASA deep space scope serves up EPIC Earth snapshots

Valerion
Alien

Death Star

Does anyone else think the moon traversing the earth looks rather like a Death Star going past? Or is that just me?

5
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Lotus F1: 38°C? Sand in your Vblocks? Must be building a data center in Bahrain again

Valerion

The software must be 100% reliable and never crash!

Maldonado on the other hand...

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Virgin Media filters are still eating our email – Ntlworlders

Valerion

Re: ISP email?

"Does that mean you've never needed to change ISP (in which case you're lucky) or because the grief of changing email address is too great to contemplate changing ISP - however bad they are?"

Never had to change ISP. Got Virgin Media (well, Telewest) installed when I moved into my house in 2001. I haven't moved since and Virgin's cable internet is generally far superior to anything a phone line can offer.

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Valerion

Re: ISP email?

Because I've had the damn email address from the ISP for 15 years...

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US Treasury: How did ISIS get your trucks? Toyota: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Valerion

Re: Direct Sales

You can save even more when the cars are nicked from Europe and shipped over...

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Top telematics: Black box helps driver swerve speeding fine

Valerion

Sample rate

GPS receivers usually update every second, but most loggers won't store every position. Back when I worked in telematics (many years ago, to be fair), the actual sample rate was every 20 seconds or so. Based on a normal-ish car, it would be very easy to accelerate from standstill to 60mph - and be doing double the speed limit - and then back to under 30mph again all within a single sample. A policeman could clock me at 60, but my log might only show 30, even though I had indeed done 60.

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Things you should know about the hard work of home working

Valerion

I did it for 2 years

Quite enjoyed it. Converted the spare room into an office that had a door I could shut to keep the family out, so I wasn't disturbed. VPN connection to the office on a separate LAN to the main home network. Even had a proper company VOIP phone with an extension number and a DDI. Skype chats kept me in contact with everyone I worked with (who were spread over 3 other offices in the UK plus India).

Lost a load of weight because I could spend some time at lunch actually cooking stuff that was healty rather than raiding Asda. Did get a bit lonely, but I would visit the offices for a couple of days once or month or so (Staying overnight). The overlooked for promotion bit is a good point, because I was the obvious choice for one, but someone else got it - someone who worked in the office. And I agreed with the decision because managing a team is easier if you are actually with them.

These days I'm in a different job and sometimes work from home (I no longer have the proper office setup thoiugh). I'm at home today actually. So far I've eaten half a packet of chocolate hobnobs so my old healthy habits seem to have gone.

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Uber is killing off iconic black cabs, warns Zac Goldsmith

Valerion

Too expensive

I got a black cab home from Heathrow once - about a 45-60 minute journey. It came to £180. £180 for an hours work ain't too bad.... of course, I had no idea what the cost would be beforehand. Luckily the company was paying, not me.

Next time I'll try and hail an Uber. It'll tell me in advance what the price is likely to be and will be a fraction of that.

Even last week I got an Uber from my house to the tube station. It cost £6. On my return there wasn't an Uber close enough for me to want to wait for it so I got in a waiting black cab. Same journey (Actually slightly shorter due to one-way systems, and quicker due to no traffic) cost me £10. The Uber car was clean, modern and comfortable. The Taxi was dirty and noisy. The Uber car driver asked me if I wanted the temperature changed to increase my comfort. The Taxi driver seemed annoyed I'd interrupted his newspaper.

Both have a place, but for me Uber provides the better, cheaper service. And as a consumer, that's what I'll choose.

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No, Siri – I said PAWN stars! New Apple TV gets voice, touch control

Valerion

Re: Meh.

We have never gone to put the TV on and found that it won't work because the remote needs charging

No, but I've gone to put it on and can't because the remote batteries are flat, and I don't have any spares. Being able to stick it into one of the many lightning chargers dotted around the house will be quite simple.

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Layabout, sun-blushed techies have pick of IT job market, says survey

Valerion

More salary needed

The amount of speculative emails I get from recruiters telling me about a fantastic opportunity, urgent, must fill it now... and paying what I consider to be a pittance is incredible.

No - you will not get an experienced senior software engineer for £35k.

As is pointed out time and again, there is no shortage of people, just a shortage of people willing to work for what you want to get away with paying them.

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Perhaps the AIpocalypse ISN'T imminent – if Google Translate is anything to go by, that is

Valerion

A big chicken

I had this problem recently. Fed a list of countries through Google Translate. All translated perfectly, except Turkey, which came out as a translation of the bird.

Luckily we caught it before we went live.

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Netflix profits plunge, but streamer still plans global domination

Valerion

Re: Only a matter of time...

They've put their prices up twice since I joined. But only for new customers - as an existing customer I still pay the old price. That's a refreshingly nice model and more reason to love them.

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Apple Music: First three months for free? We lasted less than 3 hours

Valerion

I'm using it

So far, so good.

What I like to do is have all my music on my phone. I don't care about streaming because I mostly listen in the car. I just have tracks I like and stick it on Shuffle.

I currently have Napster, but the killer use for me is that ALL the purchased/ripped songs I have on my phone, PLUS any that I tag for offline listening on Apple Music appear seamlessly in one place, so I can shuffle between them without there being any difference. That is perfect for me. So I'll cancel Napster and keep this.

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Mastercard facial recog-ware will unlock your money using SELFIES

Valerion

Awesome

All I need is one of those cutout masks of Simon Cowell from the party shop, put that up to my face - they already have holes for eyes so my eyes can substitute - and I can buy anything I like!

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Ubuntu daddy Mark Shuttleworth loses fight to cancel $20m bank fee

Valerion

World Cup

Well, they needed pay the bribes to FIFA somehow!

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The thing about Apple's 'one MORE thing'? It's a streaming music thing

Valerion

UK Price

Will $14.99 = £14.99?

I pay £10 for Napster which me, wife and daughter can all use on our phones at the same time (no idea if that's against their T&Cs or not), so the same price for the Apple one with better phone integration might see me switch.

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Land Rover's return: Last orders and leather seats for Defender nerds

Valerion

I once

Spent 3 days offroading in the Malaysian jungle in a convoy of Defenders (old, beat-up, heavily customised ones). Best trip ever. Crossing ravines on bridges made of nothing other than 3 tree trunks, fording rivers, climbing up ridiculous inclines over boulders and camping out under the stars (in mozzie nets...). There was also a fair amount of drinking, but that didn't seem to affect the driving much. If they broke down (which they did), the one of the amazingly competent mechanics would fiddle with bits, whack some other bits, and they'd always come back to life. (On a previous trip they'd broken a driveshaft, so went back to an abandoned Land Rover they'd come across a couple of miles back, stripped the driveshaft from there and put it on their one!).

Also we took a trip to the Cameron Highlands. That place is literally full of old (S1 and S2) Land Rovers. There is not a new car in sight. They just keep them patched up and they go on forever. They're used on the tea plantations.

Luckily a good friend of mine runs the owner's club in Malaysia (and helps organise the Rainforest Challenge). Good place to go if you are a LR geek!

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Celebrating 20 years of juicy Java. Just don’t mention Android

Valerion

Today Java is among the world’s most popular programming languages

In the same way that Herpes is among the world's most popular sexually transmitted diseases.

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Manchester car park lock hack leads to horn-blare hoo-ha

Valerion

Foreign equipment

My father-in-law had some wireless headphones he had bought in Malaysia. Whenever he used them the remote locking for my car would not work if parked outside.

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Apple threw its TV out the window after years of research: report

Valerion

Re: What a tool

>>He is therefore an idiot or should be investigated for attempted share manipulation.<<

I don't see why they are mutually exclusive.

5
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Mildly successful flying car crashes - in mildly successful test flight

Valerion

Roads?

Where we're going we don't need roads...

Nice soft fields to crash into though? Yeah, we need those.

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Sony tells hacked gamer to pay for crooks' abuse of PlayStation account

Valerion

Profiting from crime

If Sony have acknowledged this was a fraudulent transaction and are still insisting to be paid on it, they are profiting from a crime, which sounds fairly illegal to me.

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SPY FRY: Smart meters EXPLODE in Californian power surge

Valerion

Re: Rubbish driving

...a surge caused by a rubbish lorry driver crashing into a utility pole...

Shouldn't have employed a rubbish driver

Or at least not give him a rubbish lorry to drive - invest in some good ones!

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Ford: Our latest car gizmo will CHOKE OFF your FUEL if you're speeding

Valerion

Or if some goon holds up a 20 sign in view of the car's cameras…

That's going to be the best way to get tailgating cars of your arse on the motorway. Get one of the kids to hold up a replica 30 sign in the rear window and watch them disappear...

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A Brit in California moves to the Lone Star State – just swerve the TexMex grub

Valerion

Friend of mine

Moved to Texas a few years back. He was never religious at all, but nowadays he sometimes put some religious nonsense on his Facebook. I can't work out if he has actually been converted or just does it to fit in.

Incidentally he remains the only person I know who has shot and killed a man (who broke into his house).

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Uber snaps up hip map startup

Valerion

Startup?

deCarta have been around for almost 20 years! Not sure that qualifies as a "Startup" anymore.

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'Hi, I'm from Microsoft and I am GOING TO KILL YOU'

Valerion

I've never had one.

Been waiting for years but never got it.

What I will do when it finally happens is give my name as Mr Cameron, then ask them to call me back on my landline. I will then give the phone number for Downing Street.

Hopefully it'll eventually get annoying for whoever mans the phones there, and MI6 will sort it all out once and for all.

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Forget 1,000 lashes for Facebook posts, Saudis now want to behead blogger Raif Badawi

Valerion

Do we even need Saudi oil anymore?

Serious question from my position of ignorance. The US produces more than Saudi does, especially now the shale oil is being produced in vast quantities. Sure, the price might go up a bit if we cut them out of the supply chain, but given it's come down a lot recently we can probably live with that.

They could go, what, 10 years without oil revenue on existing cash reserves? Then they'd have nothing. No economy at all. And we could ignore them forever.

Of course oil from the rest of the world will run out eventually, but science will have solved that before then.

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Valerion

Re: Trouble , nothing but trouble

If you can't tell the difference between Mother Teresa picking a dying child out of the gutter, and an totalitarian state torturing its citizens, you are short of MIPS.

Why do you have to be religious to pick a dying child out of a gutter? It Mother Teresa did that it was because she was a nice person, not because she was religious.

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Don't pay for the BBC? Then no Doctor Who for you, I'm afraid

Valerion

Re: Devices

"Give me a "B", give me an "A" give me an "N" give me a "D", give me a "W"....."

Bandwagon? Ok, I see what you did there.

2
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Samsung buys LoopPay ... to be better at bonking than Apple

Valerion
WTF?

Looppay? More like Loopy!

So I have to buy a special case - for $59.95?? Why the hell would I do that? Are these people mad? Who is going to buy one of these?!

If it's embedded in the phone a-la Apple Pay then people will use it. If they have to pay extra, they won't. This is using outdated, insecure technology and people have to outlay a not insignificant sum to use it. Mag stripe is dead and gone. This will be too within 2-3 years.

Then they have the gall to say "yes, but we work at 90% of all retail locations!". Yeah, and cash works at pretty much 100%, so what's your point?

Well done Samsung. Trying to get out of the "copycat" label just got a lot harder.

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Lashed Saudi blogger Raif: Prince Charles has word with new king

Valerion

One day

The oil will run out, and then Saudi can go back to being a desert backwater, and we won't have to pretend to be friends with then anymore.

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