* Posts by Stoneshop

1756 posts • joined 8 Oct 2009

HP insists 'we don't have a global dress code' – while deleting one from its website

Stoneshop
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Dropbox

Their employees have no restrictions on the clothes they wear, as long as it has an extremely large number of pockets that passers-by can put stuff into or take their stuff out again.

Flickr employees wear similar clothing, but their pockets can only hold photos.

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Stoneshop
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Windows

Microsoft clothes

would be, ahem, more decorative than functional, exposing body parts that you'd rather not expose. Sew-on patches for these wardrobe malfunctions will become available on alternate Tuesdays when there's no 'u' or 'r' in the month, and the year is a prime number. Employees have taken to stripping and starting with a fresh set of clothes roughly every three months

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Stoneshop
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Holmes

They would need to order their clothes through the HP website, which would more often than not result in a Seriously Large Box being delivered, containing two memory modules, a set of rack mounting bolts and a software license for the Fortran compiler for HP-UX V7.

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Stoneshop
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Childcatcher

Re: Not sure what the fuss is about...

...pretty much every company I know has a dress "code".

There was this snippet of a job interview I read on Usenet: "Do you guys have a dress code?"

"Well, um, we prefer you're dressed, yes."

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Wait, STOP: Are you installing Windows 10 or RANSOMWARE?

Stoneshop
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Boffin

Re: Are any of us surprised?

I am sorry to say that you just cannot get through to some people regardless of how hard you try.

Tried a sledgehammer, a pickaxe or the aptly-named Stanley Fubar (XL, preferrably)? The diamond-blade water-cooled saw I have eats 10cm concrete for lunch, so a luser's cranium should be no problem at all.

(safety glasses icon, for obvious reasons)

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Windows 10: Buy cheap, buy twice, right? Buy FREE ... buy FOREVER

Stoneshop
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Megaphone

Re: Kudos for the 1970's music reference

They seem optomised for Bass and loudness

ITYM lobotomised

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ATTACK of the ZOMBIE SATELLITE: Run radio hams, run!

Stoneshop
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Black Helicopters

Re: can we use it for target practice?

The limited amount of harm this satellite is causing is not worth generating a bunch of orbital debris that will cause problems for years.

Then it's a good thing it's not hovering over Hillview, Kentucky.

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Stoneshop
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Mushroom

Re: 'kin typical

we started celebrating the similarities.

Like Starbucks, McDonalds and Coca Cola? The NSA is called differently here, but they act the same.

You go celebrate if you want. I won't.

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Just ONE THOUSAND times BETTER than FLASH! Intel, Micron's amazing claim

Stoneshop
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Re: @Lamb0

Even at higher chip cost, because ultracaps and batteries are very expensive.

I'd think circuit board real estate would be the primary factor

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UK.gov wants to stop teenagers looking at tits online. No, really

Stoneshop
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Boffin

Re: Forget The Tits

So you prefer male Gallus Gallus Domesticus over, say, a Parus caeruleus?

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Technology quiz reveals that nobody including quiz drafters knows anything about IT

Stoneshop
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Mushroom

Re: 12/12

If they're going to take it seriously, they deserve the criticism. getting fed to 4chan.

FTFY

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Stoneshop
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Holmes

Re: 10/12

I wonder if its varying the questions for some reason

On the results page they show the scores to 15 questions, so they are indeed varying

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Stoneshop
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Re: 10/12

Then again, it's easy to write a mail client which will only take keyboard input (just as some Unix passwd commands only take keyboard input - not command-line redirects) , so couldn't send any file (even a text one).

Even systems that take keyboard input from a hard-wired terminal only can send files, although it may take quite a bit of effort, and not all options may be available to Joe Random User. You could for instance UUencode the file, send it to the puncher on the ASR33, start the mail program, read back the punch tape and hey presto, you've got it ready to send. Or even UUencode by hand (the algorithm is not that difficult) and just type the lines as you encode them.

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World-beating TWO-QUADRILLION-WATT LASER fired by boffins

Stoneshop
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Go

LFEX was finished last year, is about 100 metres long,

So they need to work a bit on growing bigger sharks. Which shouldn't be too difficult, after all, Godzilla came from Japan too.

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ICANN further implicated in .Africa controversy

Stoneshop
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FAIL

Re: ICANN has gone rogue

"Oh, I cleaned the ICANN building out in Los Angeles."

Had he done his job properly, we wouldn't have had this mess.

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Stoneshop
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Coat

Re: My question is: who cares about a .africa domain?

ileftmybrainsdownin.africa

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Jeep drivers can be HACKED to DEATH: All you need is the car's IP address

Stoneshop
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Devil

Re: A start, but...

Indeed. Like I suggested on another subject a while back, it should physically affect the idiots that allow such a situation to (continue to) exist.

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Stoneshop
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Facepalm

Re: why are any incoming connections accepted at all?

Because car manufacturers want to be able to upload patches directly to your car when it is parked on your driveway.

So kill everything that's listening for incoming connections as soon as the vehicle starts moving.

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べーコンはどこですか? demands post-pub nosh fan

Stoneshop
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compose - slash - u

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Ashley Madison invites red-faced cheats to bolt stable door for free

Stoneshop
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Re: Bolt for Free ?

Horse bolted door?

Nope. The correct password is Correct Horse Battery Staple.

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Reg top tip: Don't have the same name as someone else if you use Facebook's Instagram

Stoneshop
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Headmaster

Re: @ Stoneshop (was: One wonders ...)

<i.No ... I'm pretty certain I've been here for a while and know my password.</i>

This doesn't in any way disprove that at some point you might have had the "Jake" login which you then forgot about.

"I'm not "making do", I'm just "jake". Have been, for quite awhile.

So why label it as a "pet peeve" then?

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Stoneshop
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FAIL

Re: One wonders ...

Either both [Jj]akes are you (which looks likely, given the tone of the content), and you either forgot you already had a login or were too, ahem, inattentive to spot the "Forgot password?" link on the login page, or there are two distinct Jakes, one of which then evidently needs to make do with "jake", "Jake1", "AnotherJake", "NotTheSameJake" or any other variation .nes. "Jake"

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Cops baffled by 'canal corpse' that turned out to be COCONUTS

Stoneshop
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Alien

Re: Someone pulled it out?

If there is any alien life, it will be found in a disused canal. the East River.

(particularly rich in nutrients, etc)

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Google robo-car in rear-end smash – but cack-handed human blamed

Stoneshop
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Go

Re: Room for improvement

Not just sense idiots, they also need to predict their unpredictable behavior. In other words, Defocused Temporal Perception.

Just make sure there's room in the basement, next to the elevators.

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Farmer mooved after reunion with two-year fugitive cow

Stoneshop
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Coat

Take this matter out to pasture

It behooves a serious publication like The Register to be not reporting this in such a cheesy manner.

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600 MEELLION apps open to brute force account guessing

Stoneshop
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FAIL

Re: Numbers

It's not the app itself that's vulnerable (maybe it is, but that's irrelevant in this case), but the service that it connects to. THAT is available full-time, whether or not any legitimate user has connected.

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Ideal solar system for SECOND EARTH found – and it's just 186 light-years away

Stoneshop
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Mushroom

So if you think

this will trick the Vogons into not destroying our solar system but HIP11915 instead, you'd be wrong. They'll just get to do it twice.

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WINGED VELOCIRAPTOR 'from HELL': Closest thing ever to a real DRAGON?

Stoneshop
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Flame

Re: But could it breathe fire?

"It’s thought to be the origin of the chinese dragon myth—because they are well huge, giant giant lizards, they’re scaly, they’re man eaters, literally they’re man eaters, and they don’t actually breathe fire, but they do have the worst breath of any creature known to man."

Douglas Adams, on the Komodo Dragon Lizard

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Behold: Pluto's huge ICE MOUNTAINS ... and signs of cryovolcanoes?

Stoneshop
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Re: Wow

As I read it, the first probe to visit another planet, Venera, did so just outside Winkypop's lifetime.

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The Great Barrier Relief – Inside London's heavy metal and concrete defence act

Stoneshop
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Re: The only computers were a VAX running PDP 11

@ Phil O'Sophical

true, but if the PDP was used to control the gate machinery I'd expect it to have been running RT-11. With a number of third-party interfaces hooked up to all kinds of actuators and sensors. A VAX won't cut it there. Also, early '80's PDP11's were widely available and a fair bit cheaper than your average VAX.

(where's the cobwebs icon?)

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Stoneshop
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FAIL

The only computers were a VAX running PDP 11

That's like "a Vauxhall driving a Morris".

The PDP11 is a computer system, not an OS, as is the VAX. The PDP is 16-bit, and can run RSTS, RSX-11, RT-11 or various flavours of Unix. The 32-bit VAX runs VMS or Ultrix (or some other Unix variant)

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Hacking Team: We’ll be back in the spyware biz before you know it

Stoneshop
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Boffin

"ethical" behaviour.

Even when the temperature is below zero, it is still referred to as "degrees Celcius" (or Fahrenheit, as the case may be)

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FLYING PIG crash-lands in Utah: Rider survives, bacon saved

Stoneshop
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New form of lift

"What saved my bacon, was that the head of the pig held a lot of hot air and helped the balloon to descend at a safer rate,"

Make a balloon shaped like a politician, and you don't even need burners to get off the ground

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DOUGHNUT (donut?) and whale FOUND ON PLUTO

Stoneshop
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Holmes

NASA: Doughnut FOUND ON PLUTO – along with a WHALE

When they get a closer look in a few days they'll find it's not a doughnut but a bowl of petunias.

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This box beams cafes' Wi-Fi over 4kms so you can surf in obscurity

Stoneshop
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Re: Self destruct?

Compact cassette would be possible (BTW, it was launched in 1963, not 1965), but MI used tape recorders. I remember several instances of the tape running off the supply reel just after the "This tape will self-destruct within ten seconds" message.

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Stoneshop
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Boffin

Re: Fail of fails.

Murphy's Law. Soon as some lowlife spots an open relay, they'll hammer it, guaran-damn-teed.

Given that it retransmits at 900MHz, you'll need a matching transceiver at the user end. It won't show up on the average punter's laptop/tablet's access point list.

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Stoneshop
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Holmes

Re: Self destruct?

The cassettes in the original Mission Impossible used to emit smoke,

Cassettes? Portabe tape recorders, or were you perhaps referring to the movie based on the original Mission Impossible TV series, grasshopper?

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Dormant ALIEN SLIME LIFE frozen in SPEEDING comet will AWAKEN - boffins

Stoneshop
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Re: microbes (for which there is *no evidence*)

Not smoking gun proof but hell, they're doing science - On. A. Comet.

In spaaaaaaaace!

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Why OH WHY did Blighty privatise EVERYTHING?

Stoneshop
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Headmaster

Adjust your parser

Quite apart from anything else it's not the pursuit of profit that makes organisations more efficient: it's the prospect of having whatever profits you might be able to make competed away (leading to the death of the organisation) that does.

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Who wants a classic ThinkPad with whizzy new hardware? Lenovo would just love to know

Stoneshop
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Pint

Re: ME! Oh ME! MeohmeohmeohMEEEE!

Before this X201 my daily lappie was an X61, with a wedge-shaped auxiliary battery underneath. Apart from roughly doubling battery life it added some heft to the machine, and a slight, but nice enough tilt to the keyboard.

I'd like this new retro Thinkpad to also come in an X variant (screen size and performance are less important to me than portability) with extended batteries as an option.

Beer for the Lenovo engineer who gets this machine out the door.

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Vicious vandals violate voluminous Versailles vagina

Stoneshop
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Paris Hilton

Re: YELLOW paint?

At least these are already pink: https://goo.gl/maps/wkarB

(switch to Streetview from here, and look southeasterly)

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Heinz cockup sees Ketchup's QR codes spurt saucy sites

Stoneshop
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Devil

I'm amazed no one has started printing their own on sticky labels

I'm amazed you haven't noticed it's being done.

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Belgium trolls France with bonkers new commemorative coin

Stoneshop
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Boffin

Reg Units please

In fact Belgian punches above its weight for well known people given its size.

You need to express that in Norris per Jub per Wales, so that we can get a meaningful number to rate different countries.

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Stoneshop
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Let's face it, the list of famous Belgians probably has a single entry,

There's also Eddy Merckx, a famous messenger from the war between the Romans and the Belgians.

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Innocent Spaniards roasted by experimental napalm mead

Stoneshop
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Mushroom

Vodka with rawit

About 10 of them, and "matured" for a week or two, is equally undrinkable straight, but diluted 1:5 with plain vodka it's pretty much OK. As a reference, I put 3 or 4 rawits in a nasi dish for three.

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Sun's out, guns out: Plucky Philae probot WAKES UP ... hits 'snooze'

Stoneshop
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Coat

Re: It's alive!

Can't keep a good lander down!

Well, the anchors didn't work as planned, and there's very little gravity, but still ...

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Intellectual Ventures: Toshiba is violating our patent! Toshiba: What patent?

Stoneshop
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Re: About time...

Charging a higher fee hurts small inventors and prevents them from access to the patent system.

How about charging a base fee plus a a tiered uplift based on the applying company's revenue?

and a much larger fee for rejected patents

With patents found to be failing to pass muster in a court case suffering the same fate.

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Spaniard sues eBay over right to sell the Sun

Stoneshop
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Facepalm

Re: Yeah, right...

the buyer will be able to make a "Where's my celestial body ?" claim

The answer to which can be pretty straightforward (or even straightup, for certain latitudes and times of day and year)

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Stoneshop
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Mushroom

Heavily used but in good condition

No warranty, no returns

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Stoneshop
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Boffin

Re: Oops!

What's commonly referred to as "fire" is an energetic exothermal oxidising reaction; the sun is driven by nuclear fusion.

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