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* Posts by Captain Save-a-ho

475 posts • joined 10 Sep 2009

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FINALLY Microsoft releases Office for iPad – but wait there's a CATCH

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: The consumption myth

In a word, ofcoursefuckingnot.

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Samsung Galaxy S5 in El Reg's claws: This time the 'S' is for 'sensible'

Captain Save-a-ho
Flame

Huh?

"It's not a cheap marvel: the Australian price of $AUD929 translates to $US829 or £517." "...it'll be hard to resist."

I suspect it will be quite easy to resist. My three-year-old Galaxy Nexus does everything I want and the battery lasts two days if I dim the screen as much as possible (20% left at the very end of an arduous day on the default settings). As once was noted, "There's a sucker born every minute," and I doubt the S5 will go completely unsold. Still, +500 quid is just idiotic for any PHONE. Not a laptop mind you, but just a bloody phone. Pfft.

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AMD: Why we had to evacuate 276TB from Oracle DB to Hadoop

Captain Save-a-ho
Pint

Re: intrigid

Actually, that depends entirely on whether your buddy has pledged to buy the pints at the after-funeral trip to the pub.

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How to Poo on a Date wins odd book title of the year

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: Not Hodder & Stoughton...

I'm waiting for the Oolon Colluphid follow up: How does this God person poo anyway?

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Satisfy my scroll: El Reg gets claws on Windows 8.1 spring update

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Having used every desktop version of Windows since 3.11,

You would think Microsoft would understand the problem, given how well they navigated the shift from Windows 3.x to 95. But then again, all those really smart people are long gone by, right?

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Captain Save-a-ho

Re: BOFH?

Personally, I prefer the tape safe.

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Barclays warns freelance techies of DOUBLE DIGIT rate cut

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Meanwhile...

What a fat load of bollocks. Bonus pools and noble sacrifices don't enter the picture where contractors are concerned. So your client is deciding to squeeze you on price? Fine, the project ends early at their behest and you find someone else who needs your help. And if that's not acceptable, you shouldn't be a contractor.

I'm sure any second you'll give some diatribe about the evils of capitalism and how contractors should unionize to fight such practices. Meanwhile, those people willing to contract their services are the very epitome of the capitalist that you hate so very much.

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No sex please, we're Twit-ish. Vine bans non-educational nudity

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: "we just prefer not to be the source of it."

In a free economy (which doesn't exist anywhere, including the Internet), Vine is perfectly within their rights to define their business as they see fit. They also must suffer the consequences if the majority of their users go back to using YouPorn, PornHub, or XHamster instead.

In other news, the other 6.99999999 billion people on the planet didn't even notice.

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'Mommy got me an UltraVibe Pleasure 2000 for Xmas!' South Park: Stick of Truth

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: For me The Book of Mormon set the bar for anything related to Trey Parker and Matt Stone

Everyone has AIDS!

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China shutters Windows ‘rival’ Red Flag Linux

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Seriously

If you wait until then, you probably are too late anyway. Been there, got the t-shirt, would rather have gotten my paychecks...

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Google's SECRET contracts: Android lock-in REVEALED!

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: I just wish I could remove the ****ing Facebook app

You don't have to root the phone. Try shopping around next time to find a phone that doesn't force Facebook on you (or anything you seem annoyed with). Google Nexus came without it by default. I'm sure there are others.

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Intel Labs demos crazy-efficient, crazy-fast 'network on chip'

Captain Save-a-ho

One would assume this to be the case, but a grid of compute nodes as described could end up as a mix of processors, where specialization dictates the need. They do this already with on-board memory and graphics controllers, so it's not a far-fetched idea that you could have RISC and CISC on the same die, operating independently and/or in some joint mode.

Of course, the bigger question is really whether Intel could find any demand for this sort of thing in the mainstream. They certainly don't want to approach the market with the Son of Itanium, as it were (even though Intel-haters the world over would gleefully cheer such a move).

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Has Cisco made a $415 MILLION mistake with the Whiptail buyout?

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Over pay means over charge

And customer feel free buying other vendor's kit. So what's your point?

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Windows 8.1 update 'screenshots' leak: Metro apps popped into classic desktop taskbar

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

So...

Are they scraping WordPad to bring back EDLIN?

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Obama reveals tiny NSA reforms ... aka reforming your view of the NSA

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: "Having faced down the totalitarian dangers of fascism and communism"

Obviously, in Obamaspeak, this can only refer to the so-called Tea Party. Or Grover Norquist. Or both.

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Report: Prez Obama kicks Healthcare.gov contractor to curb for web disaster

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

That's low

How desperate must things have been for Verizon to see the US government ditch then for HP. Oh the horror!

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US Air Force turns up dubious Autonomy accounting in reseller contracts probe

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: someday

Has to be better than the movie Ass that wins an Oscar in the future world of Idiocracy. Or not.

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Ghosts of Ballmer and Gates haunt Microsoft CEO job hunters

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Racist

He's too fat to be a chimp, but chimps everywhere should really only be offended if people start calling them Ballmers.

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Intel ditches McAfee brand: 'THANK GOD' shouts McAfee the man

Captain Save-a-ho
Paris Hilton

Re: Name change

Just wait. There's still plenty of time for McAfee Intel Security to fulfill your wish.

Paris, in tribute to all drug-snorting fantasists everywhere.

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Marketing told us: 'Justin Bieber is a fad. He’s not going to last.' – Company formerly known as RIM

Captain Save-a-ho

"That would explain his apparent popularity with teen girls then..."

Because they found a famous vagina they can relate to?

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New NSA leak reveals invasion of the management consultants

Captain Save-a-ho
Facepalm

Re: "diversity, empowerment, innovation, risk-taking and agility"

The only thing missing are the made-up, corporate buzzwords. Something like linkativity or rightshoring.

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JESUS battery HEALS itself - might make electric cars more practical

Captain Save-a-ho
Paris Hilton

Re: Well, that was fairly pointless

Don't act so high and mighty. You know you have a balloon fetish like all us hetero males do...

Paris, because, like, duh...

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Linux backdoor squirts code into SSH to keep its badness buried

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Infection Vector?

Wouldn't sendmail or bind represent a far more likely avenue?

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SECRET draft copyright treaty LEAKED: Meet the Trans-Pacific Partnership

Captain Save-a-ho
Trollface

Re: Beep beep

Short memory, eh? If you think that crony capitalism is a product of the last 40 years, you're sadly mistaken and quite naive. I suspect examples extend back 100s of years, but I know you can see the effects as early as 1929, once Herbert Hoover took over in the US and Ramsey McDonald came back into power in Britain.

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New wonder slab slurps Wi-Fi, converts it into juice for gadgets, boast boffins

Captain Save-a-ho
Thumb Up

Re: Let's look at this...

Not that it will improve the numbers enough to make it commercial viable, you have to keep in mind that they're proposing arrays of the material, so that 1/2mw would certainly grow larger. You're also underestimating other available signals that would provide additional power. While not world-beating, that enough of a start to work on improving the efficiency and scope such that charging a phone might be possible, even if very slow.

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Google Nexus 5: So easy to fix, it's practically a DIY kit - except for ONE thing

Captain Save-a-ho
Trollface

Re: Just Wait

Apple have probably got a patent on using glue to hold phones together.

Your phone's glue is holding its components together wrong.

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OS X Mavericks mail client spews INFINITE SPAM

Captain Save-a-ho
Windows

Re: Symphony?

Pfft. Real writers only use Edlin.

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Hard-as-woodpecker-lips MOUSE GOBBLES live scorpion, LAUGHS off stings to face

Captain Save-a-ho

Re: What's the big deal?

None of those mice paraded around as the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal either.

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Captain Save-a-ho

Re: Grasshopper? Surely.....

Nah, Chuck just roundhouse kicks at the air until it's forced into his lungs.

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Scared yet, web devs? Google smears malware warnings over PHP.net

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: Three hops

Silly rabbit, the Chocolate Factory ad blocker will block all those nasty, untrustworthy, non-Google ads. Problem solved!

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New leak claim: NSA saw hole in Mexican prez's email box - and hacked it

Captain Save-a-ho
Flame

Re: Quod licet Iovi, non licet bovi

Pfft...you can get imprisoned for looking or sounding Muslim. The reasoning doesn't mean anything in the grand scheme. The important thing is that those with power wield it for their own benefit at the expense of others. And how is this so much better than capitalism? Pink commie scum everywhere you look nowadays.

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Most 'cloud' traffic never sees the cloud: Cisco

Captain Save-a-ho
Paris Hilton

Re: Which vendors???

As every fule kno, the people who want workloads to be distributed actually distribute them from the get go, with apps appearing in both data centers in active-active fashion. There's far higher demand for this setup than the flexibility to move VMs at will.

Paris, who knows all about active loads...

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Hadoop 2 stampedes onto world's mega compute clusters

Captain Save-a-ho
Holmes

Weren't we already here long ago?

I'm pretty sure most of the discussion around Hadoop and Big Data is just the 360 degree come around from Cloud Computing 1.0 (aka mainframes). Didn't System 38 do most of this, although minus the free and open bits?

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Why a Robin Hood tax on filthy rich City types is the very LAST thing needed

Captain Save-a-ho

Couldn't hit water falling out of a fecking boat

And the prize to missing the point goes to:

"Central to the Robin Hood folks' logic is that there's such a thing as too much financial speculation."

Wrong. The central point of a transaction tax isn't to discourage investment. The central point is to vastly expand the tax base so large that the tax burden can exclusively rest on those who choose to undertake financial transactions. Whether the tax will have a deterring effect on investment is debatable, but irrelevant. No amount of discussions about tax policies or economics can ignore the overwhelming mathmatical support for moving to a transaction tax model exclusively. Note the work at http://www.thetransactiontax.org and http://www.apttax.com

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Diamonds are forever POURING down on Jupiter, Saturn - boffins

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Best. Line. Ever.

"Diamonds aren't forever on Saturn and Jupiter. But they are on Uranus"

I could not read that without laughing out loud. My inner teenage boy thanks you greatly.

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Apple wins patent for entrance to retail store

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Next thing, they'll accuse consumers of not entering the store correctly.

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USB 3.1 demo shows new spec well on its way towards 1.2GB/sec goal

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: if there were ever a cabling construct that was the work of the Evil One, it was SCSI.

Meh. Anyone who's anyone knows that one cable standard could ever be the Devil's handy work: Tip and Ring. Think about that closely.

Ahem, about that coat...

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Canadian family gives up modern tech to live like it's 1986

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

1986 in Canada?

Pretty sure the 80s didn't come to Canada until 1994, you hoser.

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Space-walker nearly OPENED HELMET to avoid DROWNING

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: “Better not to forget.”

"If you hold a lungful of air you can survive in the total vacuum of space for about thirty seconds. However, what with space being the mindboggling size it is, the chances of getting picked up by another ship within those thirty seconds are 2 ^ 276709:1 against.."

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British spooks seize tech from Snowden journo's boyfriend at airport

Captain Save-a-ho
Black Helicopters

I know I've heard about this before

Per the infamous John Galt:

"You have heard it said that this is an age of moral crisis. You have said it yourself, half in fear, half in hope that the words had no meaning. You have cried that man’s sins are destroying the world and you have cursed human nature for its unwillingness to practice the virtues you demanded. Since virtue, to you, consists of sacrifice, you have demanded more sacrifices at every successive disaster. In the name of a return to morality, you have sacrificed all those evils which you held as the cause of your plight. You have sacrificed justice to mercy. You have sacrificed independence to unity. You have sacrificed reason to faith. You have sacrificed wealth to need. You have sacrificed self-esteem to self-denial. You have sacrificed happiness to duty.

You have destroyed all that which you held to be evil and achieved all that which you held to be good. Why, then, do you shrink in horror from the sight of the world around you? That world is not the product of your sins, it is the product and the image of your virtues."

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Bug-finder chucked for posting to Zuck

Captain Save-a-ho
Pint

Re: ...and here we se the "Head In The Sand" approach to system security...

Probably because he's already seen all the mindless drivel most people post on Facebook and all of his friends prefer to meet at the pub instead for a pint. Or not.

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Google goes dark for 2 minutes, kills 40% of world's net traffic

Captain Save-a-ho

Obviously, a resembled tea wasn't good enough.

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Just add creepiness: Google Search gets even more personal

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: One must be a complete idiot

Actually, JDX, your comparison to the diary is probably a better example than the original one given. That's completely idiotic. Certainly as much as posting the same drivel on Facebook, Twitter, et al.

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US Republican enviro-vets: 'Climate change is real. DEAL WITH IT'

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: @ Burb - @ AC 0647hGMT - Whatever.

Google is your friend. Regardless of your AGW point of view, don't stand in your bully pulpit, ranting like a denier or believer idiot when ten seconds of searching produces:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_scientists_opposing_the_mainstream_scientific_assessment_of_global_warming

Pathetic? Likely, but the mirror isn't forgiving whether you bother to look into it or not. Geez.

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Murdoch machinations mean Microsoft must rename SkyDrive

Captain Save-a-ho
Black Helicopters

Re: Network Storage Access

More like "Never Secure Again"

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ITU readies gigabit G.fast standard for copper's last wild ride

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: Vectoring, vectoring! Wherefor art thou vectoring?

We have clearance, Clarence.

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Linux 3.11 to be known as 'Linux for Workgroups'

Captain Save-a-ho
Coat

Re: WFW 3.11

They make excellent drink coasters...

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US public hate Snowden - but sexpot spy Anna Chapman LOVES him

Captain Save-a-ho
Boffin

Re: The main reason

A movement of 3 percentage points hardly qualifies as a "mood swing". To be fair, Yougov.com doesn't provide information on the accuracy of their poll. But based on some quick calculations for a sample size of 1000 in a country of 250000000 to 300000000 people, 3% easily falls within the confidence interval at 95% and 99%.

Nothing to see here; move along.

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French snooping as deep as PRISM: Le Monde

Captain Save-a-ho
Big Brother

Remember, remember the Fifth of November...

People shouldn't be afraid of their gov'ts. Gov'ts should be afraid of their people.

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HP Enterprise scores major win with $3.5bn Navy network contract

Captain Save-a-ho
Pirate

Re: Interesting

Relying on the hot trend of the day, I'm sure most of the systems will be available via VDI exclusively, so they can control and record everything someone is doing. Will that stop someone? Hahahaha, of course not. But it will set them up to buy the next big thing in IT controls before the end of the new contract, which means even more money.

If they were kind, HP would at least use Astroglide next time.

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