If you want the pits try living in South East Asia, we get Religion friendly (Wait for it)
It is truly truly gross, low fat processed nastyness. If we do get 'bacon' that is not fowl, it's water injected Danish C*$@
I am sitting here eating Roast Pork Rice (in no way religion friendly) as it's possibly as close to what i want as I'll find in this place. ( good crispy pork on rice cooked with the juices of steamed chicken (used to make Chicken rice) and a bit of ginger... Magnificent)
If i could make a good Sarnie out here it would go like this :-
Bacon:- Nice thick cut Organic Pig, If you can't decide back or streaky have both (both, double meat for me ;-) ), pan fried to crispy. If you cut off the fat you should be excommunicated.
Bread - Good solid crusty white loaf, thick cut, fried in the remaining fat from the Bacon
For me a little bit of freshly made up Colmans English mustard.
And if it's a serious occasion, a nice fried egg
Any condiment that does not originated from Great Britain has to be ignored.
If it is part of a goo UNhealthy English Breakfast, bring on the Black Pudding, decent sausages, tomatoes, Mushrooms.... all fried in Bacon fat.
If you want Scottish, add haggis
Beer for the first person to go out an eat one of those magical English Bacon Sarnies for me...