Feeds

* Posts by Arthur the cat

80 posts • joined 18 Aug 2009

Page:

Schoolkids given WORLD'S CHEAPEST TABLETS: Is it really that hard to swallow?

Arthur the cat
Windows

"was well into my teenage years before the birth of the web"

Jesus, I'll just crumble now. I'd done two degrees, been married and divorced and had set up my own startup seven years before the birth of the web.

I remember when it was all fields round here. Field 1 was columns 1-5 of the punched card and contained the statement label, field 2 was the continuation mark in column 6, ....

4
1

Straight to 8: London's Met Police hatches Win XP escape plan

Arthur the cat

Unfortunate incidents at the Met

as several hundred Win 8 machines accidentally fall down the stairs and get broken on the way to the cells. "The different interface confused our officers, who were thus powerless to prevent these tragic accidents" said a Metropolitan Police spokesman.

12
0

Scam emails tell people they have cancer to trick them into installing a money-stealing Trojan

Arthur the cat
Megaphone

I'm normally a pacifist but ...

some people should simply be beaten to death with a baseball bat. I've got a sick relative who has days bad enough to open one of these without thinking about it first.

13
0

Eight EXCELLENT languages for the fondleslab-friendly Intranet of Thingies

Arthur the cat

Re: Please God no

I'm voting for <script type="text/haskell">. That way every web developer will end up spending their entire day worrying over what a monad is, and the rest of us can get back to the real world in peace and quiet without interfaces that change every bloody time you fire up the app.

7
0

Oi, bank manager. Only you've got my email address - where're these TROJANS coming from?

Arthur the cat
Unhappy

Santander are very good at ignoring you

I've had this problem, although nothing has arrived in the last week or two. I'm with Cahoot, Santander's online bank, and most of the trojans I've received have been supposedly from Fedex or other large carrier claiming they were unable to deliver a parcel, details in the zipped attachment. The sole entry in the zip file has a long name so the extension(s) are probably invisible to most, and end .pdf.exe. The mails might be a tad more plausible if the source addresses weren't scattered round the world but claiming to be from the UK.

On several occasions I've complained to Cahoot, but my emails just get ignored. I've never been arsed to keep trying as I don't run WIndows, so the mail is a mere nuisance rather than a threat. One of these days I ought to change banks, but how the hell do you choose a good one? I had been thinking about switching to the Coop ...

3
0

Hear that? It's the sound of BadBIOS wannabe chatting over air gaps

Arthur the cat
Alien

Gaps

Looks like people who want seriously secure systems are going to have to replace air gaps with vacuum gaps. I can just see the job adverts: wanted, sysadmins. Must be familiar with Linux and Orlan Ms.

1
0

Want to BUILD YOUR OWN Tardis? First, get a star and set it spinning...

Arthur the cat

Re: No mention of Frank Tipler's time machine design?

"isn't one of the limitations of such time machines that you cannot go back further than when the time machine was constructed?"

It's a problem with any frame dragging based time machine and AFAIR with wormhole based ones as well.

1
0
Arthur the cat
Boffin

No mention of Frank Tipler's time machine design?

Tipler's 1974 paper "Rotating Cylinders and the Possibility of Global Causality Violation" is a time travel classic.

All you need for a time machine is an infinitely long cylinder of something denser than neutronium that's spinning at rates that mean its surface speed is about half light speed. Just a small matter of engineering. You could probably get funding on Indiegogo with no trouble.

5
0

Nookie becomes, um, a virtual reality for Oculus Rift gadget gamers

Arthur the cat
Happy

Novint Technologies

I notice that the linked Wikipedia page for the haptic control has an image with the caption

"A pair of black Novint Falcons. The nearer one has the pistol grip attached, and the further one has the standard ball grip."

If the ball grip is standard then they were obviously intended for this use from the start.

0
0

Hyenas FACEBOOK each other with their ARSES: FACT

Arthur the cat
Joke

Helping elderly relatives

So the next time an elderly relative asks me what this Facebook thing is that everyone talks about, I can say with a straight face "it's like a collection of hyenas' bottoms".

17
0

Facebook fans fuel FAGGOT FURY firestorm

Arthur the cat

Re: This is disturbing

Actually the full online OED at www.oed.com does have an entry for the meat(-ish) product, it's in section 5 (out of 9).

1
0

Young? Been online five years? Congrats, you are the ELITE MINORITY

Arthur the cat
Happy

Re: TBL

"I'm expecting Tim Berners-Lee to pitch up in a minute and pwn the lot of you!"

Actually TBL is younger than me and started programming later. I'm not sure he had access to Arpanet like I did either.

The icon is the nearest thing to a smug grin that ElReg offers.

0
0

Sun-seeking Cambridge boffins chase Solar Challenge car crown

Arthur the cat
Facepalm

UPDATE: they've crashed the car

According to the Cambridge Evening News web site, the team have rolled the car and buggered the canopy and some of the PV cells. They've got two days to fix it.

Those cells cost about a quarter of a million. Ouch.

0
0
Arthur the cat

Re: How effective?

Again, from talking with the team.

Firstly the PV cells are gallium arsenide, which can AFAIR run hotter than silicon, and secondly the canopy material is opaque to infra red but passes almost exactly the visible and near UV spectrum that the PV needs, so there's less heating than you might expect. Their major worry was the driver overheating, and the car is designed to have an air feed passing over the driver and then over the PV to supply some extra cooling for both.

1
0
Arthur the cat

Re: Why GPS to work out where the sun is?

I talked to some of the team a few weeks ago, and at that point the tracking was going to be controlled from the support vehicle, with the tracking angle set by dead reckoning, not feedback in the car. When I asked why, they said there's already a couple of feedback loops controlling the motor speed and battery charging in order to maximise performance and adding another control loop for sun tracking potentially made the control theory a nightmare and risked reducing overall performance. Given the nature of the road they decided tweaking the tracking angle every few minutes was good enough.

0
0

BBC releases MYSTERY RIDDLE poster for Doctor Who anniversary episode

Arthur the cat
Happy

Re: Big earner

"Look at Eastenders - why on earth is the BBC doing this?"

Apparently so Glaswegians learn to speak in a way that Londoners can understand.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-glasgow-west-24021961

2
0

That earth-shattering NSA crypto-cracking: Have spooks smashed RC4?

Arthur the cat
Trollface

Re: It doesn't have to happen sometime

"for example, there is no O(n) or O(1) sort"

Radix sort is O(n). Algorithms 101.

"I don't know what the theory is behind encryption"

but I'll make comments about it anyway, because this is the internet and that doesn't require informed debate.

1
2

Three axes data-roaming fees in SEVEN countries

Arthur the cat

Re: Tethering will be blocked

Question for those who know more about the subject than me: how do 3 know you're tethered if you have an unlocked phone? Active connection count? I'll be very miffed if they can check what apps I'm running.

0
0

Report: Secret British spy base in Middle East taps region's internet

Arthur the cat
Black Helicopters

The more I think about Miranda's detention ...

the less it makes sense. Why was he transiting through Heathrow when he could have flown Rio to Berlin direct? If he was being an errand boy for the Guardian, why didn't they advise him not to carry anything sensitive on his laptop or memory stick? Even I know that's stupid and I'm not a journo with copies of classified documents. If he was picking something up from Berlin, why wasn't it sent over the net in encrypted form instead?

Unless everyone involved is mind bogglingly stupid about data security and antiterrorism laws, the only explanations I can come up with is that either May et al are lying through their teeth, an obvious assumption, but why isn't the Guardian saying Miranda was carrying nothing significant in that case, or the whole lot's some sort of theatre cooked up between the Guardian and the government, and that way lies tin foil helmets and other lunacies.

Black helicopter icon for obvious reasons.

0
0

Your encrypted files are 'exponentially easier' to crack, warn MIT boffins

Arthur the cat
Black Helicopters

Re: random.org

Who in their right mind would trust random numbers from a complete stranger sent over the net? Even if the site is genuine, how do you know you've not been spoofed by a man in the middle attack? Sure, it's fine for picking your lottery ticket numbers, but not for anything you want to be secure.

5
0

German guardsmen growing mono-boobs from drilling with Nazi-era rifles

Arthur the cat

Re: Umbridge

Surely Umbridge is where that well known soap opera, the Urchers, happen?

0
0

Signing out of a broken Britain: The final Quatermass serial

Arthur the cat
Alien

Re: From what I heard Kinvig was *weird*

"The Adventures of Don Quick."

Dear God, I'd forgotten that. Broadcast in 1970, Don Quixote in Space, written with acid trip sensibilities. Seriously weird.

1
0

Laser-wielding boffins develop ETERNAL MEMORY from quartz

Arthur the cat

Re: "Ultrafast"

It's a few days since I read the paper, but IIRC they were writing at ~1MB/s, so it would take 3.6e8 seconds (11.4 years!) to fill a 360TB disk. This is the lab prototype however, we're probably 5-10 years off commercial versions.

0
0

Lasers to carry 622 Mbps Earth-Moon link

Arthur the cat
Coat

pictures from the farside observatory

Oh, Gary Larson is working for NASA these days?

1
0

Tweet like escaping Hell depends on it, Twitter Catholics told

Arthur the cat

Isn't this simony?

Trading of indulgences or other spiritual goods by church officials for temporal gain, in this case twitter following. According to Dante that gets you into the 3rd bolgia of the 8th circle of hell, stuck upside down in a hole with fire burning your feet, until the next sinner comes along and you get pushed down to make room.

Hmm, I've just realised - Dante invented stack architecture.

6
0

Big Beardie is watching you: Lord Sugar gets into facial recognition

Arthur the cat
Big Brother

Next things after flash crowds

Flash "Being John Malkovitch" sessions by Amscreen installations.

Choose a face, print out many copies, pick a time. Then when the daft stats come in - "it seems the queen likes looking at condom adverts" - Amscreen loses what little credibility it had and advertisers leave in droves.

Well, I can can dream.

4
0

NASA to flip ion engine's 'OFF' switch after brilliant 5.5 year burn

Arthur the cat
Mushroom

Re: Mass of NEXT and power source ?

It's likely for missions to the outer planets that NASA would use some form of radiothermal generator rather than solar panels. Cue the usual hysteria from the, er, "differently scientific".

0
0

Nuke plants to rely on PDP-11 code UNTIL 2050!

Arthur the cat

Re: Do they have spare parts?

You could probably produce an equivalently behaving board for most parts. Most of the board would be empty apart from traces, and all the work would be done by a small FPGA. Bug for bug compatibility would be the biggest challenge.

0
0

COLD BALLS OF FLAME light up International Space Station

Arthur the cat
Flame

Eek!

“Normal flames produce soot, CO2 and water. Cool flames produce carbon monoxide and formaldehyde."

I'm definitely sticking to normal flames in any enclosed space then. Give me a lung full of soot any day rather than CO and CH2O.

2
0

INSIDE GCHQ: Welcome to Cheltenham's cottage industry

Arthur the cat

Re: Test the secret ballot

I don't know what happens currently, but friends in the generation above me who were involved in invigilating ballot counting(*) during the 60s and 70s have told me that at the end of the count, when all was done and dusted, the small pile of ballot papers for the communist candidate used to be handed over to a nice gentleman from Special Branch for "safe disposal". There have also been cases when people just under eighteen voted and were subsequently prosecuted using their ballot papers as evidence. The number that gets logged in the polling station as you're handed the paper ties you directly to your vote. The ballot is only secret against other people, not the state.

(*) Ballot counters are often party political activists, and some are prone to adding votes for other parties to their candidate's pile if not watched, hence any sensible party supplies invigilators as well as counters.

0
0

Mystery Sony big-screen ereader to sport E Ink bender

Arthur the cat

Re: A4

@James 51: The format is irrelevant, it's the size (in both inches and pixels) that matters. My wife and I both read loads of academic papers and they're all formatted for approximately A4. A kindle is about A6, and tables of data, complicated multi-line formulae or complex graphs become completely unreadable, both because of the size reduction and reduced resolution. If the e-reader also tries to reflow text that's supposed to be in a fixed layout the result is worse than useless.

I used to have an iRex Iliad that was A5 and that handled A4 PDF well enough for me, but my visual acuity is slightly freakish, and my wife simply couldn't read research papers on it. In the end it died a death, and they'd gone bust by that point. Nowadays I use a 10" cheapo Android tablet that is near enough A5 size, but it's heavy compared to an E-Ink device, the emissive screen tires my eyes faster than E-Ink and the battery life is ridiculously short in comparison.

There is a definite niche market in the research community for A4 PDF based document readers. Simple monochrome would do for 80-90% of uses. However, academics aren't renowned for their huge salaries and off shore bank accounts, so the price would have to be around that of a cheap 10" tablet to get any sales volume.

1
0

'Liberator': Proof that you CAN'T make a working gun in a 3D printer

Arthur the cat

Re: Pens should be banned

"And who designs stones?"

Stonemasons. A venerable and ancient craft still going strong in the modern world.

3
1

Maggie Thatcher: The Iron Lady who saved us from drab Post Office mobes

Arthur the cat
Meh

Re: is this the same

Exactly right. BT offered to have fibre to every home and business in the land by 2000 if they could maintain their monopoly. Thatcher vetoed it. What's the current percentage who have fibre today?

5
0

ROBOT COCKROACH SWARM unleashed in Sheffield lab

Arthur the cat
Alert

Re: No shoes!

I'm surprised H&S/HR allow that. They usually freak out about people going shoeless in offices, never mind labs.

0
0

iPads in education: Not actually evil, but pretty close

Arthur the cat
Facepalm

Re: "I find it hard to believe that the life expectancy is as long as two years..."

Two years may be the average but the record time I know is 20 minutes from a manager being given a brand new, top end and very pricey laptop to it being a pile of useless junk. It had a docking station. The docking station had latches to hold the laptop firmly. Rather than undoing the latches to release the laptop, the manager (of the system programming group no less) decided levering it free with a big screwdriver must be the obvious and right thing to do.

2
0

Wind farms make you sick … with worry and envy

Arthur the cat

Re: effect on birds

"I can think of a lot of much better reasons to pillory windfarms such as their devastating effect on local bird populations - especially raptors and other large predatory birds. Or the way they mash bats."

A few years ago Nature published a study of all US wind farms and bird mortality. The average result over the entire US was 0.5 bird deaths per turbine per year - vastly lower than the death toll caused by domestic cats or hunters. The reason why the "wind turbines slaughter birds" meme came about was because one of the earliest wind farms was placed in a pass in the Rockies that was the equivalent of the M25 for a species of endangered raptors, and they got sliced and diced in numbers high enough to affect the species' survival. That wind farm was shut down long ago, and current wind farms on migratory routes shut down as soon as radar sees large numbers of birds heading their way.

The real problem is bats. The pressure fluctuations near a turbine can make their internal organs rupture. That's why they're trying using ultrasound to keep bats away.

7
1

The Lynx effect: The story of Camputers' mighty micro

Arthur the cat
WTF?

Geography is a bit screwed

Cambridge doesn't have a Hill Street, but it does have a Hills Road, and if they moved into Bridge Street opposite the Mitre and Barron of Beef, they moved into St John's College.

4
0

Ofcom ploughs up UK spectrum fields, reseeds them with 4G

Arthur the cat

Re: 3dB

An increase of 3dB is twice the power. 10dB is 10 times the power. Bels are base 10 logs, decibels 10 times that.

1
0

Meet قلب, the programming language that uses Arabic script

Arthur the cat

Re: pronounce it as "squiggle".

Remembering Prince's little snit with his record label, how about "The computer scientist formerly known as Knuth"?

2
0

Scientists spin carbon nanotube threads on industrial scale

Arthur the cat

Re: replace all those copper cables that the metal thieves nick all the time

Wouldn't work. In many cases they're thieves because they're too stupid to do anything else. That's why they end up nicking fibre optic cables, thinking it's copper, and get a surprise when the scrap dealer tells them second hand glass isn't worth buying.

1
0

Exploding stars drive Galactic geysers

Arthur the cat
Happy

Re: Ergs?

Well if it was specified in joules it would be "ten to the Forty Four Joules" and "ffj" doesn't trip off the tongue so easily as "foe". Cue endless repetitions "FFS, WTF is FFJ?"

0
0

Who's using 'password' as a password? TOO MANY OF YOU

Arthur the cat

Monkey?

Why on earth is monkey so popular? Are they reshowing the old TV series or something?

3
0

Archaeologists uncover 'Unicorn's lair'

Arthur the cat
Joke

Obvious why their borders are so heavily guarded

What with having the sexiest man in the world as their leader, *and* unicorns, if the North Koreans didn't guard their borders so well, they'd be swamped by people wanting to live there.

3
0

El Reg mulls commentard icon portfolio shake-up

Arthur the cat

Fingers in the ears, going "la la la"

for things that are getting way too much coverage like the recent US election.

1
0

'Hypersensitive' Wi-Fi hater loses case against fiendish DEVICES

Arthur the cat
Facepalm

Wikipedia: Firstenberg was a Westinghouse scholar

and yet he's against electromagnetic fields. Sigh.

5
0

LONDON iPHONE 5 MADNESS: 'You must be CRAZY to buy Apple'

Arthur the cat
Trollface

Moonies, Scientologists and Apple Fanbois ...

what a bunch of cults. (Good job this isn't the Grauniad.)

1
0

First Irish-speaking virus holds bloke's computer to ransom

Arthur the cat

Warning - national stereotyping ahead

Shouldn't an Irish ransom virus zip and encrypt the contents of your waste basket/trash can?

6
2

Greens wage war on clean low-carbon renewable energy

Arthur the cat

Re: "Britain’s own geothermal investment are pretty puny"

@Andrew Orlowski: "MacKay's book is very out of date now"

Published 2009 - not exactly written in Latin. :-)

However, when it comes to geothermal power you're right about the new methods being better - the 2050 pathways document from DECC gives a "maximum technically feasible" capacity of 4-5GW. Technically feasible is always larger, sometimes much larger, than economically feasible, but even a GW or two is not to be sniffed at. The problem won't be the hippy type greens though, it'll be CPRE and Bill Bryson whingeing about how pylons spoil the rugged beauty of Dartmoor.

Anybody should be completely free to object to power infrastructure in their area, but only on the condition that they have smart meters fitted and can be cut off whenever the grid needs to shed load. Nothing like bringing home the consequences of one's choices. :-)

2
0
Arthur the cat

Re: Geo exporting

There's talk of a power interconnector between Iceland and the UK, and another to Norway. They'd both be long and across hostile seabed, but they're part of the proposed european grid.

5
0
Arthur the cat

"Britain’s own geothermal investment are pretty puny"

That's because the UK has sod all high quality geothermal potential. Around Dartmoor is the best place and even that's not great. If you want realistic figures, MacKay's book says the biggest estimate of geothermal capacity in the UK comes to 1.1 kWh/day/person, which is about 2.75 MW, or 4/5ths of fuck all compared to the national electricity base load of 20/40 GW (summer/winter).

Which is a shame, because when you've got it, geothermal is good.

1
1

Page: