"We help people get stuff done."
"We hinder people when they're trying to get stuff done."
621 posts • joined 4 Aug 2009
"We hinder people when they're trying to get stuff done."
At one place I worked we (the programmers) instigated the use of fault sheets where other members of staff could report problems with the programs we were writing. The fault sheets contained boxes to specify which program it was, which screen/page of that program and a large box to describe what the fault was. I remember one coming in with neither of the first 2 filled in and, in the third large box, was written "Funny on screen" - magic!
Yes, and I still possess the copies that I managed to buy! Not quite the full run as I'm missing the Feb 1984 edition and anything that appeared after the March 84 edition.
Didn't you write it down on a post-it note? Yeah, it's probably that one stuck to the side of the monitor with your other passwords and bank details. You know, the one in plain sight from the window.
Must buy popcorn and get a good ringside seat for the fight!
Or chuck it through an anagram generator and get:
Ok, so maybe not!
Ofcom = gutless, roll-over-and-die weed
It's interesting how things have changed.
Maybe I was just in the right place at the right time.
"Cloud computing is shite. It takes over everything you’ve got, then farts in your face and runs away giggling."
Couldn't have put it better! I wouldn't trust any of them with my data. I am paranoid when it comes to backups (having been bitten in the past). The irreplaceable stuff is backed up in 6 different places, one of which is not under my roof!
Still got some 5.25" floppies around somewhere along with some PetSoft Commodore PET programs on CASSETTE - Lunar Lander, Star Trek 3D amongst others! Not got any punched cards, though...
Dunno about DRM, but back in the 70s I almost convinced a (hard of thinking) work colleague that if you looked extremely closely at the grooves you could see the lyrics. Well, how else would the singer know which words to sing?
That is all
...for the ifixit.com breakdown for a comparison!
Some tricks for shop computers I used to employ were:
1) A POKE to the VIC-20 video chip to change the screen width from 22 columns to 23 or 21. This would cause anything on the subsequent lines to be offset left or right by one extra character each line. Really annoying for the shop assistants who couldn't figure out why their program listings were going diagonally down the screen.
2) Running a simple loop to copy the CBM-64 ROM into the underlying RAM, a POKE or two to keep it there, then a few more POKEs to change the SYNTAX ERROR text (now in RAM) to something far less pleasant. Then I'd stand back to watch kids (usually) cause an error and ask their unsuspecting parent what that meant!
3) Enter a short program into a Spectrum that changed the screen to 2 shades of blue, print "COMMODORE 64 BASIC V2", "64K RAM SYSTEM 38911 BYTES FREE" and "READY" with a loop to flash a cursor. That got lots of people confused! I once even convinced someone that a Spectrum had had a CBM-64 ROM installed in it by mistake!
They've also re-run the algorithm that fuzzes out car number plates and faces. It's managed to completely obscure my number plate on the 2008 photo (originally one letter could just be made out), several bricks on the wall beside my front door (nowhere near the house number) and a bit of the tree in the neighbour across the road's garden! It HASN'T however, fuzzed out the face of one my cats sitting on the doorstep - maybe it decided the cat's face was fuzzy enough!
I'd rather not!
Nurse, the tablets, QUICKLY!
Yeah, but if it had been £ or $ then el Reg would have spelt it BEEELLION!
There, there Matt
You go and have a nice lie down and leave the rest of us to read the article properly and come to more logical conclusions.
Hmm, many of my gadgets - e.g. printer, screens, electric drill, multimeter, kettle - don't play music. As they are now almost completely worthless, I'd better throw them away. Thanks for the advice, JMJ!
Yeah, I bet they bloody do!
Indeed, and it's why many programmers like me were shitting themselves in the 1980s when Ronald Reagan's "Star Wars" system was proposed. That's the one that was going to require millions of lines of computer code that had to work properly the first time an invading missile was detected coming over the horizon (and not go bananas when a pigeon shat on a detector).
Agreed. I deliberately haven't bought anything Sony-related since then. Yes, they should learn that customers have long memories.
Less often nowadays. I think the WWF has put them on the endangered list.
Yeah, but, remember, this is Michael Gove you are talking about. Most teachers hate him and the crap he normally spits out. He just got lucky this time around when pulling random ideas out of a hat (though I'm sure he'll find some way of cocking the whole thing up before too long).
They also mislabelled Windows 8 as an operating system...
I knew I'd been right to avoid their crap for years!
See any Road Runner cartoon where Wile E Coyote orders something from the Acme company and has it delivered within 10 seconds.
Are those the ones that hide under hospital beds?
Ah, they'd probably been using Apple's Map app!
Agreed! One can only hope!
I'm still using a Microsoft Internet Keyboard Pro (about 13 years old). The hand rest is now almost completely smooth. It usually gets ripped to pieces once every 3 or 4 years to extract the shite* that's accumulated under the keys ;)
* Well, not exactly shite, probably more like bits of sandwich, biscuit crumbs and half a ton of cat fur...
That keyboard was obviously one of the few decent things they ever made (unlike Vista, Win 8, ME and a host of other old truck).
I've still got a Windows 98 PC around just for playing Myst! ;)
Well, I hope that was the mostly decent 1981 BBC TV version and not the awful 1960s film or the dire 2009 TV remake.
Classic Theme Restorer
It's about time someone took a large mallet and started hitting the Firefox developers around the head with it until they get the message to "STOP FUCKING UP OUR BROWSER!"
However, good news, there's an add-on called Classic Theme Restorer which can restore various "deleted" options including the add-on bar and "Tabs not on top" amongst others.
And, yes, it works fine on Australis!
Yes, it's a lie. 50% truth ISN'T the truth! Jeez!
...sorry we lied today. We won't do it again (until tomorrow).
They sent me an email the other day telling me to change my password (hadn't realised I still had an account with them - I think I once downloaded Adobe Air to see what it was all about).
I went to their web site and looked for the option to cancel/delete my account - no such thing, of course! You have to speak (well, chat) to someone online who had to put a case through for deleting the account. When he asked why I wanted to delete my account I reminded them of their crap security + the fact that (apart from the occasional use of Flash on some web site - though its usage is on the way out, thank goodness) I don't actually use any of their junk software. Finally, they reluctantly agreed to delete the account.
Maybe they should name the next one the iPad Water - it will be able to put its own fires out then.
So many truths in that post. Wish I could upvote you more than just the once.
Know what you mean! However, I am now glad that I am in a very small "company" with a brilliant (ahem) boss - it consists of:
End of list.
"So worried were the Beeb by its viewers’ potential inability to process more than one televisual event they re-broadcast the pilot."
I was always under the impression the BBC had been deluged by requests to repeat it as so many people had missed it.
"Then the BBC ended the Doctor’s run in 1996"
Nope, they ended it in 1989 - 1996 was the "movie" that they hoped would result in a new series.
I can't wait for Jeremy Clarkson to test drive one on Top Gear!
The "most informative" comment I ever saw was on a non-trivial piece of Perl. Most of the code was undecipherable in the first place, but the most complex part was blessed with a single comment (the only one in the whole script) that simply read:
# This is a skanky hack!