* Posts by Barracoder

55 posts • joined 20 Jul 2009

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SMASH the Bash bug! Apple and Red Hat scramble for patch batches

Barracoder

Thank you...

...to the Phantom Downvoter, for amusing me with your single, stark downvotes on anyone who complains about downvotes.

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'Windows 9' LEAK: Microsoft's playing catchup with Linux

Barracoder

Windows has had this since 2006.

Mark Russinovich wrote a multi-desktop add-on ages ago.

http://technet.microsoft.com/en-gb/sysinternals/cc817881.aspx

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VIDEO SELFIE DRONE: 'AirDog' UAV follows you everywhere you go

Barracoder

Slap drones!

Iain Banks is looking down smugly.

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Chinese iWatchers: Apple's WRISTPUTERS ALREADY in production

Barracoder
FAIL

Sure....

Because we need something else to charge every 7 hours....

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BBC hacks – tweet the crap out of the news, cries tech-dazzled Trust

Barracoder

Great article

"The middle class talking to themeselves" I couldn't have phrased it better.

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'Weird' OBJECT, PROPELLED by its OWN JETS, spotted beyond Mars orbit by Hubble

Barracoder

6 jets?

Thats exactly the number a spaceship would need for attitude control. Has anyone seen Elon Musk lately?

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Boffins have constructed a new LIGHT SABRE. Their skills are complete

Barracoder

Finally!

Now where is my hoverboard?

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Tencent offers 10TB of free cloud storage for all

Barracoder

Re: Depends on the data...

My media horde are too busy pillaging to waste their time in any Chinese cloud.

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Mobe app makers doubt Windows 8 will be worth the hassle - poll

Barracoder
FAIL

Re: If only...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!

Sure, Java already does that, AFAYK. Right.

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Microsoft releases JavaScript alternative

Barracoder
WTF?

Re: What...

If you're a developer, do yourself (and your client) a big favour and stick to standards. Don't get caught in the "standards-plus" trap - it will cost you dearly to escape.

What, like Ajax, that non-standards-compliant addition to the browser by Microsoft that, oh I don't know, made the whole Web 2.0 revolution possible?

Standards are only worth following as long as they are not enforcing technological stagnation.

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Sceptic becomes UK Environment - but not Climate - Secretary

Barracoder

Re: Misnomer

By your standards then, Creationism/Intelligent Design is a theory? Fails every scientific test but might possibly still be true?

Thanks but I'll stick to science and I'm sure you'll forgive me my skepticism.

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Barracoder
Thumb Down

Re: Misnomer

I'm going to be a skeptic until the day some Warmist uses his model to make a prediction that actually comes true. Until then, climate change isn't even a theory, it's a guess.

Because that's how science works.

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More Steve Jobs iPad mini attacks from beyond the grave

Barracoder

I've had a chat to the wife

10" is always better than 7".

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Assange takes refuge in Ecuadorian embassy

Barracoder
Holmes

There's a reason for stereotypes

Let me get this straight. An Australian travelling in Europe shags some Swedish birds who get angry when they find out about each other and gang up on him, runs away to London and crashes at his mate's girlfriend's pal's house for a while. After a while, he gets into a bit of trouble, borrows some cash from his pals and then disappears, only to resurface in Ecuador, with a tan?

Well, I definitely didn't see that coming.

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Record-breaking laser pulse boosts fusion power hopes

Barracoder
Mushroom

Only two decades away!

Or maybe only 19 years and 364 days away now, excluding leap years.

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Russians drill into buried 20 million-year-old Antarctic lake

Barracoder
Thumb Down

Actually, Gaia loves CO2....

For the record, we're currently living in a period of exceptionally low CO2 levels, by normal Earth standards. The only notable period with similiarly low CO2 levels is the Carboniferous Period, during which, ironically, all our coal was laid down.

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Nuke support in UK hits record high

Barracoder
WTF?

The government??

I'd prefer it if the government got out of the way completely and just left the market to get on with it. Nothing annoys me more than seeing my tax going to publicise crap insulaion schemes or, even worse, subsidising windmills.

The environment is far too important to be left to the idiots in govenment.

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Russian Mars probe heads into space WITHOUT ENGINES

Barracoder
Holmes

Insurance?

Russians? Insurance? Has anyone had a look to see if there's a suspiciously satellite-looking thing lying under a tarp in the bacl of the lab?

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BlackBerry stumbles to feet, full of apologies

Barracoder
Paris Hilton

Factor 1000 SPF

Single point of failure. 'Nuff said.

Paris, because I love her 'nuff.

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Chaos feared after Unix time-zone database is nuked

Barracoder
FAIL

Seriously, you Unix guys crack me up

Are you seriously saying a time server that's critical to the performance of your OS was running on some guy's home FTP server?

And that not one of you, ever, thought this was a bad idea?

Not one of you had the foresight to check that the guy holding your balls hadn't nicked half his data from a commercial database?

If you were working for me I'd fire the hell out of your incompetent asses.

72point AllCaps Fail.

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Microsoft delivers fatal blow to yet another botnet

Barracoder
Gimp

I thought about it

and you're an idiot. 'nuff said.

Gimp mask, because I wish you had a zipper

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Red Hat engineer renews attack on Windows 8-certified secure boot

Barracoder
Paris Hilton

And the prize for Most Egregiously OTT Comment goes to....

"Microsoft - They are the second most evil company in the world (after Monsanto)"

Really.

Paris, because she's hOTT.

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UBS tells IT contractors: Take a 10% pay cut ... or 100%

Barracoder
WTF?

If your contract is with Harvey Nash, not UBS...

...why would anyone take a cut? If you have any brains at all go to Harvey Nash, show them the schedule on page 1 of your contract and tell them to take at least half of the cut. And if they say no, Lloyds are hiring....

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Hackers dump secret info for thousands of cops

Barracoder
Big Brother

Hardly.

They have all our info and have no qualms about using it. Now we have theirs.

Democracy at work.

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First reports on XM-25 Judge Dredd smartgun in A'Stan

Barracoder
Thumb Down

Not exactly

More like a kick up your arse would be effective, you idiotic, fifth column, Guardian-reader.

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Microsoft Windows guru turns to cybercrime (fiction)

Barracoder
Alien

Thank you for being so insane.

Don't stress so much - alien space bats will save the day.

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Apache loses Java showdown vote to Oracle

Barracoder
Grenade

COBOL

I was going to say that Java is rapidly becoming the enw COBOL but that's not even true - with the discrepancy between the rate at which servers get recycled and the rate at which the JVM get's updated, I think Java's got about 5 more years before you can only run it reliably on legacy servers.

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First official HTML5 tests topped by...Microsoft

Barracoder
Flame

M$

Anyone who uses "M$" as an abbreviation shows themselves in one stroke to be an utter fucking loon who should go back to their cave.

Googl€-hater

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Apple threatens Java with death on the Mac

Barracoder
Flame

Lives on. Like a zombie.

No support on Windows. No support on OS/X. Pretty soon all that codswallop about Java's portability will finally come true because the only platform it will be on is Android.

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US Special Ops robot whispercopter crashes in Belize

Barracoder

Just Kill It!

Since when did Nike start building BlackOps kit?

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Greenland ice loss rates 'one-third' of what was thought

Barracoder
Paris Hilton

No Title Required

How do you get "anti-science" out of this article? Firstly, "climate science" isn't a science, it's bad software, bad statistics and, damningly, policy-driven. Secondly, reporting that things aren't as bad as the policy wonks have been telling us doesn't make this bad science unless you, like many AGW-apologists, are conflating "belief" with "proof". From my side, I'll go with the actual numbers, not the tree ring proxies, thanks.

Paris, because there's no Wozniacki photo.

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Scottish iSchool goes 100% iPad

Barracoder
Flame

Physician, heal thyself

If you're going to start criticising someone's choice of educational hardware and proselytising Googles (sic) lesson plans, you'll find you'd be taken a lot more seriously if you could speak English correctly.

"Could have", or "could've". Never "could of".

"Toughened". Never "toughended".

"Thick angry twat". Never "Anonymous Coward"

It looks like your school had quite enough budget cuts, thank you very much.

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Facebook login page still leaks sensitive info

Barracoder
Flame

L33ks and tatties

Anyone who uses the term "luser" is a loser.

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Flaw could expose 'millions' of home routers

Barracoder

What's up MAC?

So I suppose if I only permit specific MAC addresses on my router I should be ok, right?

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Oz customs search lappies and mobes for smut

Barracoder
Paris Hilton

Right-wing????

Ummm, I think you'll find that's "Left-wing", Dosha. It's the Australian Labour Party.

Although, if we're honest, you couldn't fit a Rizla between socialism and National Socialism.

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Apple uncloaks deep details of its 11 iPad apps

Barracoder

Oh bloody hell

Here I was hoping the iPad would be the final smidgeon of hubris before the great Jobsian fall. Grrrrrrrr!!! Damn you, Steve Jobs (praise be his name)!

I was determined that I wasn't going to get one of these oversized iPhones but now I have no choice - my Need Gland is priapic with desire to own one.

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Hobbit cameras start rolling in July

Barracoder
Flame

Following the book closely

Well I for one hope they don't insist on having "Hey fiddledy dee, twelve dwarves in a tree!" moments every f****g chapter. Somehow, the sight of orcs singing might just put me off the whole thing. Ditto for singing to distract spiders, elves singing to welcome you to Rivendell, forest elves singing when throwing barrels around and dwarves singing at any time. In fact, the complete removal of all songs from the story would suit me just fine.

There's a reason why they pay someone to adapt the book for the screen so could all of you pedants please just shut up and let the rest of us enjoy the bloody thing?

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Forget SETI, this is how you find aliens: Hefty prof speaks

Barracoder
Alien

Primes

"A more realistic hope is that an alien civilization has built a powerful beacon to sweep the plane of the galaxy like a lighthouse."

Sounds remarkably like a pulsar to me. Especially as the idea of a star with the mass of our sun or more rotating with a period of minutes seems just a tad far-fetched, regardless of the theories thrown up to explain it.

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Swedish necrophiliacs in fake Facebook fundraiser

Barracoder
Happy

HØ HØ HØ

Those crazy Scandinavians, eh?! What jolly good cards they are!

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Mini-asteroid sneaks up on Earth

Barracoder
Grenade

Bloody lazy humans

The plans for this flyby have been on display in the planning office on Alpha Centauri for the last fifity years. If you can't be bothered to go and have a look it's not my fault is it?

Want to hear some poetry?

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Microsoft admits Mac was Windows 7 muse

Barracoder
Gates Halo

Microsoft innovation

Well, they did invent AJAX, via XMLHttpRequest. And didn't licence it. So, in effect Microsoft also created the underlying framework for Web 2.0.

So say thank you to Bill the next time you use GMail, you ungrateful wretches.

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Office 2004 for Mac granted extended run to appease VBA fans

Barracoder
FAIL

OpenOffice

So your correspondent thinks that some may have opted for the excellent OpenOffice alternative? Would that be because of that package's excellent VBA support? Or did your correspondence decide, as seems much more likely, to just begin talking directly out of his arse?

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Apple unloads 47 fixes for iPhones, Macs and QuickTime

Barracoder

Pity about the tethering

I won't be installing the IPhone update until I've worked out how to keep tethering. Bastards

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Troll blockers take Microsoft SGI patents

Barracoder

This whole article is a waste of a url

Here's an accurate precis:

Microsoft had old patents on which it wasn't making money. It sold them to a company who sold them to Linux community people who think they're worth something. Linux community breathes sigh of relief that they weren't sold to trolls. Linux community still think Microsoft is evil, regardless of evidence to the contrary in that Microsoft never bothered to enforce said patents.

The End.

Now you can go back to watching Countdown.

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Silverlight swallows off-line DRM pill

Barracoder

Moonlight and DRM

Wind your necks back in, penguin fanbois. Microsoft aren't doing DRM, they're just supporting the streaming of DRM content. As for whether that's a problem for Moonlight, that depends on whether the GPL allows for open-source software to be created which supports the streaming of DRM'd data. Somehow, I doubt that's a problem so normal service is resumed and Microsoft are no more evil than they were yesterday.

Unless, of course, you also think Apache is evil because it allows the streaming of those pay-per-view movies you watch when the kids are asleep.

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Windows 7 versus Snow Leopard — The poison taste test

Barracoder
Gates Halo

Multiple desktops on Windows

Multiple Desktops have been available since XP, using the PowerToy.

http://www.snapfiles.com/get/msvdm.html

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Microsoft under threat from Linux - it's official

Barracoder
Gates Halo

Smokescreen

Ummmm, as neither Apple nor Linux or any other OS is going to make anything like a major dent in Microsoft's client OS business for at least a decade (or 2), I'm going to assume this is smokescreen for the next EU Competition Commission talks. After all, if they're losing market share, they're in a competitive market....

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O2 data fails, again

Barracoder
Happy

Probably to stop tethering

I have an iPhone and noticed last night that iTunes popped up a messagebox asking if I wanted to accept new carrier settings. As I've hacked my phone to give me free tethering, I said no. Today, my phone is right as rain so it seems fair to surmise the new carrier settings don't work.

Personally, I think O2 trying to prevent parasitic tethering by people like me is the reason they've had these data problems over the last fortnight.

So sorry: my bad.

PS. Tethering rocks. I switch my router off at home because I rarely need it any more.

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Intel appeals billion euro fine

Barracoder

I hope it was worth 300 Irish jobs

I hope making sure AMD doesn't get screwed by Intel was worth 300 Irish jobs. Well done there, Commissioners. The Law of Unintended Consequences strikes again.

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