* Posts by Hans 1

3797 publicly visible posts • joined 11 Aug 2009

Microsoft cracks the whip over quality of code in software souk AppSource, orders devs to run the QA gauntlet

Hans 1
Joke

Re: the Windows giant's QA checks

Adobe and Microsoft sole code purveyors allowed in AppSource.

Hans 1
Joke

the Windows giant's QA checks

Your code must have no less than 5 remote exec vulns every 100 lines of code.

Train maker's coder goes loco, choo-choo-chooses to flee to China with top-secret code – allegedly

Hans 1
WTF?

Vive la vida loco

Ok, I have issues understanding this story.

This guy is thought to have flown from Chicago to China with paper documents of US train company's IP. I would really want to know how they know that and why they did not stop him.

Japanese, French, German and indeed CHINESE train system tech is probably 50 to 70 years ahead of any equivalent US tech.

PS: About the title of this comment: the actual song name is "vivo la vida loca" - "living a crazy life" and "Vive la vida loca" would mean he lives a/the crazy life ... and for this article, we need loco (which means mad)

PPS: Toy Dolls' version of that song is a must listen to!

RTFM: Wireless Broadband Alliance squeezes out 40-page ode to the joy of Wi-Fi 6

Hans 1
Facepalm

Transfer multi-GB over ether? How about external drives ? USB 3 is actually quite efficient, much faster than ethernet and you do not clog up the network for the others ...

Never underestimate the bandwidth of a satchel full of USB sticks

Apologies to M. Tanenbaum

Hans 1
Joke

RTFM: Wireless Broadband Alliance squeezes out 40-page ode to the joy of Wi-Fi 6

Brexit Party turn their backs, WI-FI 5 ought to be enough for everyone.

Queen Elizabeth has a soggy bottom: No, the £3.1bn aircraft carrier, what the hell did you think we meant?

Hans 1
Childcatcher

Maybe somebody with an RC sub can locate the leak and film it from outside ?

Hans 1
Boffin

Re: No more secrets!

I doubt you can find daily f-ups on bbc.co.uk, on Daily Mail, it is hard to find articles without! Also, they are serial offenders in the FAE category, and have never heard of cognitive bias - which means that reading DM articles is really unpleasant.

Tesla’s Autopilot losing track of devs crashing out of 'leccy car maker

Hans 1
Terminator

Autonomous driving is months, years, or decades away

Autonomous driving is decades away, imho, if we talk driving in a rural Italian village, mere months away if we talk on the highway.

I do think Musk is over-optimistic on that one.

NB: I admire Musk for Tesla and SpaceX, he's done a great job.

Years late to the SMB1-killing party, Samba finally dumps the unsafe file-sharing protocol version by default

Hans 1
Pint

Re: 1980s and bad actors

Schwarzenegger Van Damme, Lungren ?

I hear the young praising Cleese, Moore, Connery, Redford and other actors active in the 70's and 80's, surpassing anything on the silver screen these days, forgetting oh so conveniently that we had our share of rubbish acting amateurs as well ...

Icon ? Pint o'clock where I am now ;-)

Time to Ryzen shine, Intel: AMD has started shipping 7nm desktop CPUs like it's no big deal

Hans 1

Re: I need a new laptop

I just want a mid-range machine which can last the six or seven years my old laptop did.

This would have meant an Apple laptop, not too long ago, well, before those idiots turned into the idiot tax operation (making the battery not user-swappable, then soldering RAM and SSD).

Hans 1
Happy

Intel performance seems to be taking a big hit due to Spectre/Meltdown mitigation.

Intel performance seems to be taking a big hit due to Intel's inability to deliver decent CPU's below the 14nm die size and AMD's inability to compete (and that just changed).

TFTFY

Hans 1

Re: Three cheers for AMD.

We'd all be using Intel Itanium. That was Intel's path for 64bit CPU's but AMD64 spoiled those plans in a big way.

We'd all be using Intel Itanium. That was Intel's path for 64bit Server CPU's but Intel spoiled those plans in a big way by failing to deliver; AMD simply capitalized on Intel's failure and delivered efficient 64bit for servers AND mainstream. These days, AMD is showing Intel how to beat 14nm (by shipping 7nm Belgian waffles)

TFTFY

Hans 1
Happy

Re: U.S.P?

I just checked and my 3600 just got dispatched, cannot wait!

@ElReg: where is the "empty pint glass" icon, pretty please!

Oz watchdog claims Samsung's leak-proof phones ad campaign doesn't hold water

Hans 1
Coat

Re: I have a great idea!

Not everyone has had enough Russian to get the joke...

True, but everyone on here knows of a search engine that has ;-)

Front-end dev cops to billing NSA $220,000 for hours he didn't work

Hans 1
Paris Hilton

Re: Jobs wanted: former NSA developers seeking foreign travel??

Who in their right mind would hire a numpty dev who does not know what a keypass is ?

To think for ONE second l33ts doing illegal activities would hire this numpty is beyond me ... these outfits have the most stringent scurity policies in place, the idea is to make as much cash as possible without getting caught ...

Firm fat-fingered G Suite and deleted its data, so it escalated its support ticket to a lawsuit

Hans 1
Paris Hilton

Re: I call BS!

So, we have two options, here, either:

1. "other half" knows how to delete and expunge email in a mailbox AND Google keeps everything, even deleted stuff - shit, this would mean they have extended their IMAP protocol implementation to "not actually delete" stuff, simply move it elsewhere.

2. "other half" DOES NOT know how to delete and expunge email in a mailbox.

I am very sorry for your other half, but option 2. is so much more likely ...

King's College London breached GDPR by sharing list of activist students with cops

Hans 1
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Only monarchy fans allowed, then ?

I agree that Charles Windsor has some very funny ideas, though no madder than those of the average (goop) Hollywood celebrity.

Fine, Mia Cyrus or whatever she's called for next monarch then, right ? Just any celeb will do.

But can we get this one clear? It was Harry who wore an Afrika Korps uniform. He has also done some other rather silly things not unknown to other young Army officers, most of whom do not have degrees in intersectional feminist studies, but are quite good at getting the lads to take on the Taliban.

Ok, then, I grant you "the prince's son" (without plural), the rest of your rebuttal is off topic.

In WW2 in Italy, the King was able to depose Mussolini. But in Germany, there was nobody to depose Hitler, and in Spain the same in re Franco. It was only with Franco's death that the monarchy was restored and Spain started to return to democracy.

All jolly good, but ... may I ask, what does any of this have to do with my remarks on the UK's political institutions, where nobody checks on the PM (position soon to be known as PL for "Prime Liar", if the polls are to be believed) or parliament ... well, except another pain, the house of lard, where a bunch of inbred hereditary bloodsuckers, who have never heard of hardship, let-alone lived it, assisted by a bunch of brain-washed high priests (no I am NOT making this up!) are supposed to be some kind or moral compass ? Seriously, guys, seriously ... I doubt that even a Reality Distortion Field as strong and powerful as Apple's could fend off this ...

Hans 1
Facepalm

Re: Only monarchy fans allowed, then ?

Prince Charles is a fan of homeopathy (FFS!!!!!) and Deepak Chopra's "Quantum Healing", his sons love Nazi uniforms ... I am not really allowed to deface the ruling monarch, and I am not sure how far I can go before I get banned on here ... it does entail a higher house with hereditary and high priest MP's, in the XXI century - hereditary and high priest MP's in the XXI century!

Hans 1
Angel

Re: Only monarchy fans allowed, then ?

God is neither man nor woman: he is God.

There, I have cited the brainwashed - no, I do not believe that crap, I have no reason to.

Hans 1
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Only monarchy fans allowed, then ?

I would not go that far, that would require god to be literate, which I doubt he is ... if he exists ...

Hans 1
Holmes

Only monarchy fans allowed, then ?

I'd have no problem with her as our monarch, provided she could prove the existence of god and thereby her legitimacy!

This major internet routing blunder took A WEEK to fix. Why so long? It was IPv6 – and no one really noticed

Hans 1
Boffin

Re: If an IPV6 network falls over in the forest......does anybody care??

There are /127 sorts of people on this planet, those who understand IPv6 and those who do not.

ReactOS 'a ripoff of the Windows Research Kernel', claims Microsoft kernel engineer

Hans 1
Thumb Up

Re: It's an opinion.

Systemd seems to be interfering with your capslock key as well!

PS: I hate systemd as well.

PPS: How much ? https://youtu.be/WboggjN_G-4?t=43

Hans 1
Paris Hilton

Re: 'lagging behind' is a good thing

Who in their right mind would want to run the abortion that is MS Access ?

Paris, coz even she agrees!

Stop using that MacBook Pro RIGHT NOW, says Uncle Sam: Loyalists suffer burns, smoke inhalation and worse – those crappy keyboards

Hans 1
Thumb Up

Re: Customer service?

turn off that annoying "second fob press required to unlock all the doors... and other stuff.

annoying ? Brain-dead! I want^H^H^H^Hneed that thingy! Have an upvote!

Good news! We may be past peak Windows 10 October 2018 Update

Hans 1
Boffin

Re: Not just Microsoft

Just because Microsoft cannot do it does not mean it is a bad idea, various Linux distributions have been doing this for decades, Ubuntu was never late, never had any major issues I can recall. Compare that to

"when's the last time Windows 10 update was on time ?"

or

"When's the last time Windows 10 update did not cause serious issues and had to be pulled/got silently updated ?"

Now to security updates:

Linux distributions make a clear distinction between updates and security updates, the system works reasonably well, I think. You can even inspect the code changes, as in, diff the sources!

MS, on the other hand, crams anything it "wants to distribute" into security updates, most of which have the EXACT SAME canned buzzword-bingo-winning update description. Nobody knows which update does what.

I hope that companies go back to something more resembling the old way. At the very least, there needs to be a clear differentiation between security/bug fixes and feature changes, with the feature updates being optional.

Debian Security FAQ

Time to reformat the old wallet and embiggen your smartmobe: The 1TB microSD is here

Hans 1
Joke

Re: My wife needs one of these immedeately.

Yeah, I see where you're coming from ... you start with gold, then giver her a platinum card and she claims she needs a black card, been there, seen that ...

Hans 1

Re: Ugh, the names. [Let's ask George!]

Quality, value, style, service, selection, convenience

Economy, savings, performance, experience, hospitality

Low rates, friendly service, name brands, easy terms

Affordable prices, money-back guarantee

Free installation, free admission, free appraisal, free alterations

Free delivery, free estimates, free home trial, and free parking

No cash? No problem! No kidding! No fuss, no muss

https://genius.com/George-carlin-advertising-lullaby-lyrics

It could be Rotterdam or anywhere, Wiltshire or in Bath: Euro cops cuff 6 for cybersquatting, allegedly nicking €24m in Bitcoin

Hans 1
Coffee/keyboard

Re: Wish I understood how it worked

So, to make money from bitcoin, you have to sell electricity!

Thought of the century, we should patent that!

Hans 1

Re: Bitcoin will crash

Wait until it is low, like $$$$, then invest and wait:

https://bitcoincharts.com/charts/bitstampUSD#rg2920ztgSzm1g10zm2g25zv

It is like a wave, well, a tsunami, you just have to get in when it has fallen again - these cryptocurrencies fall real low, then Feacebook or some other cloudy outfit anounces some BS and they sky-rocket.

If you want to make money, place little amounts in many when they are low according to the many histographs you can find ... wait until the hypebubble expands, sell 66% when it reaches +200% (so that you have your profit, double what you invested) but don't be too greedy (times 3-4 initail deposit is good) ... try and get money out every now and then ... yes, it is a full time job, yes, when you sell, do not sell all, wait until it trebbles again to remove 66%, it will keep giving - the money you have in crypto from here-on is money you made from crypto! When it falls, leave it until it spikes again ....

DO NOT REMOVE WHEN LOW, DO NOT INVEST MONEYS YOU MIGHT NEED!

Greed will be your downfall. (Eye of the Beholder 101)

2001: Linux is cancer, says Microsoft. 2019: Hey friends, ah, can we join the official linux-distros mailing list, plz?

Hans 1
Holmes

I wonder if Microsoft will release the results of their kernel testing tools

If MS code quality these days is anything to go by, I would guess the results are 90% false positives and 10% bugs in the testing tool or vice-versa (yeah, I grant them that).

It's now officially the WhackBook Pro: If the keyboards weren't bad enough, now MacBook Pro batts are a fire risk

Hans 1
Windows

Re: Cupertino Idiot Tax Operation is an insult to the CUSTOMERS

Soldered components are much more reliable than replaceable.

Bullshit. Ever heard of faulty RAM ? Do not get me started on SSD durability, please, thanks.

Apart from the rudeness of this comment, it shows you really don't understand what you are talking about.

The only way to break through a "reality distortion field" as strong as Apple's is to make use of strong words.

In summary, thanks, but sorry, your opinion does not count.

Hans 1
Paris Hilton

Apple's devices USED TO BE well designed;

I had the original Ti 550 with Gigabit ethernet, when high end Dell's, Thinkpads, HP lap^H^H^Hdesktops were thicker than three or four stacked Powerbooks, where two keypresses released the keyboard for RAM replacement, 6 screws and you could replace hard and optical drive ...instructions were in the manual when on ANY other Windows laptop unscrewing voided warranty.

Now, that Powerbook was thin enough and serviceable, looked good ... I would get that thing out on 1st class transatlantics and others would pack their laptops away ... the design lasted well over a a decade. Today, they have won, what ? 2 mm ? At the cost of what ? was that worth it ?

PS: If you buy a laptop with soldered RAM and storage you are an idiot and your opinion does not count.

PPS: See PS

Hans 1
Windows

But Cupertino Idiot Tax Operation is an insult to the CUSTOMERS; that only idiots would buy Apple.

Only idiots would buy laptops with soldered RAM and storage.

You can cry all you want, you are an idiot and as such your opinion does not count.

Go fourth and multi-Pi: Raspberry Pi 4 lands today with quad 1.5GHz Arm Cortex-A72 CPU cores, up to 4GB RAM...

Hans 1
Happy

i want

I want, I will order and add to my collection 1, 2, 2+, 3, 3+ I always go for B model ... I do not see a market for 2Gb!

1Gb for those who need little RAM, 4Gb for the rest of us ...

Remember the Nominet £100m dot-uk windfall it claims doesn't exist? Well, it's already begun

Hans 1
Thumb Up

Nice publicity stunt

What will happen is, say, example.co.uk is a business, they would really like to grab example.uk and fail to do so, some John Lawless domain squatter managed to get it and is now asking for ££££. That business will then go and think: Why, why was I not with "Fasthosts", they would have saved me ££££!

Nominet, you know you will not be able to pull this one off again, right ?

*Spits out coffee* £4m for a database of drone fliers, UK.gov? Defra did game shooters for £300k

Hans 1

Re: £4m for a database of drone fliers

Interestingly May promised it would be delivered after brexit. Although she is the remainer who not only wasted 2 years 'negotiating' from the cowering position but also has resigned yet is trying to dictate more spending for her 'legacy'.

Off topic.

So Hammond has already made plans apparently to spend more than the bus figure (which was an irresponsible stunt by Boris who I do not particularly like).

Not addressing the problem, well, sorting a tiny part of the problem: 1.

2. and 4. are impossible, you can turn it the way you want, 2. means you lose 70% of your current business and 4. claims more jobs. 4. is irresponsible, it claims that making deals with economies several orders of magnitude bigger than ours, with wages several orders of magnitude lower than ours, will somehow magically create more jobs for us ??? WTF ???

I say this because if that's the new excuse for a 4th vote (3-0 to leave so far) it might already be defused as an issue.

1-2 to leave so far #TFTFY

May did not get a majority and Brexit party did a mere 34% which mean that 66% do NOT want Brexit. The reality distortion field is strong with this padawan!

Hans 1
Holmes

Re: £4m for a database of drone fliers

Yeah, well, Stalin was worse than Hitler, all hail Hitler ? WTF are YOU smoking ?

Boris is a psychopath, his place is in a specialized institution, not the street, not parliament, and certainly NOT Prime Liar office.

Then again, Britain is spooked, somehow, you do not even need a manifesto, whatever the leader says, even if the manifesto is full of lies or non-existent, does not matter ... We were promised pink unicorns, every Brit a billionaire, the manifesto does not matter, we voted for that, and bankruptcy it will become, but that is ok, because the manifesto does not count, we voted for what actually leave, and that is what we'll get, even if we were lied to, even if it means bankruptcy, we voted for it, the manifesto does not count, we voted leave.

Hans 1
Coffee/keyboard

Re: £4m for a database of drone fliers

http://www.voteleavetakecontrol.org/why_vote_leave.html

So, Boris, we voted for all that, please be so kind as to deliver that, it IS what was voted for, anything else, anything less, and a new refendum is needed.

Good luck, mouhahahaha!

Hans 1

Re: £4m for a database of drone fliers

You wait until Prime Liar Boris takes office!

Summer's here, where's Windows 10 19H2? For Microsoft, spring ends whenever the heck it says so stop asking

Hans 1
Joke

Redmond Influenza strain 19H2 to be released in spring 2020

cf title

Microsoft, you should look away now: Google's cloud second only to AWS in dev survey

Hans 1
Joke

Developers, developers, developers

Azure to migrate to AWS.

If Uncle Sam could quit using insecure .zip files to swap info across the 'net, that would be great, says Silicon Ron Wyden

Hans 1
Windows

Re: Password ZIP was built-in to Windows XP

Windows 10 is the lowest common denominator.

We just have to rid ourselves from that shit, heck, even MS have given up on improving it. Windows 10 is effectively abandonware.

PowerPoint to start telling you that your presentation is bad and you should feel bad

Hans 1

Re: As I was told

Feynamn, I downvoted three of you and I'll let you know why ... in short, we all think in different ways, as with anything, what might be easy for you might be damn hard for another.

https://youtu.be/P1ww1IXRfTA?t=3354

Microsoft's Edge gang pops a head above the parapet to give Linux fans a strong 'maybe'

Hans 1

Who would want Edge when you have "bleeding edge"?

$MS are late, always late, even when it comes to April 1st jokes ...

Boffins' neural network can work out from your speech whether you'll develop psychosis

Hans 1

Re: Wow!

They already have that in RPC. No joke icon needed, sadly ....

Hans 1
Joke

I will develop psychosis if they start bothering me with their mic!

After years of listening, we've heard not a single peep out of any aliens, say boffins. You think you can do better? OK, here's 1PB of signals

Hans 1
Headmaster

El Reg ?

It was hoped the astro-geeks would find some confirmation that there are ̶o̶t̶h̶e̶r forms of intelligent life out there [that had the technology to emit radio waves x or more years ago, where x is the number of lightyears separating us from the emitter].

Fun thought: on the other side of the milky way, there probably is a life form that has been capable of emitting radio waves for 90 000 years, yet, we will not be able to listen-in before another 10 000 years, when the waves reach us.

Maybe there is a planet 1000 lightyears away from us that had emitted radio waves for almost 200 years, yet ceased 250 years ago because they believed big business and became extinct due to planetary climate change.

This isn't Boeing to end well: Plane maker to scrap some physical cert tests, use computer simulations instead

Hans 1

Re: A new name you say.

How about "For whom Boeing Cometh" ?