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* Posts by hplasm

2638 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Facebook goes TITSUP across WORLD! Who will look at your cousin's baby NOW?

hplasm
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Happy

Big plug fell out-

of the NSA rack.

Needs a kick back in. Sorted soon...

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Luxembourg patent troll suing world+dog

hplasm
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FAIL

Just say no.

Trolling the big boys- if the big boys say no, what are you gonna do?

Sue?

What if they don't pay? Stop them selling?

Once the customers get riled up, you are toast.

You are in Luxembourg, not China...

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Internet of Things fridges? Pfft. So how does my milk carton know when it's empty?

hplasm
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Re: The internet of fridges

"...you will find a lever at the top of the fridge which can be operated manually instead of by the door to switch off the light."

Only when the door is open...

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How practical is an electric car in London?

hplasm
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Re:screw that

I also want a flux capacitor, and I want it six months ago, just before the thunderstorm.

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CIA rendition jet was waiting in Europe to SNATCH SNOWDEN

hplasm
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re:Fotherington-Thomas

utterly...

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hplasm
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Re: Needs a jingle.

Battery (to the nipples) included.

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SLOW DOWN: Insecure-by-design software on road

hplasm
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Mushroom

Not to mention-

Bloody "Queue Caution"

it means NOTHING!

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Silent, spacious and... well, insipid: Citroën's electric C-Zero car

hplasm
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Re: Thoughts

"Legislation is coming in to stipulate that electric cars must make a car-like noise..."

No- electric cars should go quietly 'veep-veep-veep-veep' as they go bu. q.v The Jetsons.

Or have no wheels.

*edit*

EEK- Alan Brown beat me to it... :)

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UK govt 'tearing up road laws' for Google's self-driving cars: THE TRUTH

hplasm
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Re:we drive on the left in the UK.

Yes. The left side is the right side.

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hplasm
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Re: Driverless car

"whoever an angry Assyrian deity chose to put close to the accident.."

Tiamat hates trains. Don't fuck with him.

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High power computing and awesome Chinese food? Sign me up!

hplasm
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Re: Entirely tangential

"You love Chinese food. Why not wait a while and buy more?"

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Japanese finally produce a ROBOT which isn't DEAD INSIDE

hplasm
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Re: The Daleks are coming!!!

"Can't climb stairs eh. Well that didn't stop the Daleks from ruling over half the galaxy."

They just ruled the bottom half...

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Ukrainian teen created in lab passes Turing Test – famous nutty prof

hplasm
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Re: From reading the sample above linked by DioDesign

Slightly OT... Is it DioDesign or DiodeSign?

That would thow an AI.

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Redmond is patching Windows 8 but NOT Windows 7, say security bods

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Or could it be...

Perhaps- But "the more they tighten their grip,the more systems will slip though their fingers..."

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Happy Birthday Tetris: It's flipping 30

hplasm
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Re: I am the man

Tetris: A metaphor for life.

</crushing >

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Marc Andreessen: Edward Snowden is a 'textbook traitor'

hplasm
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Big Brother

NSA- Agents everywhere...

"You have a problem with authority, Mr. Andreessen." "It seems that you've been living two lives..."

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YOU - NASA. Enough with the ROBOTS, get some PEOPLE to MARS

hplasm
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Re: Humans > robots?

" Everything begins, and ends, with Humans"

This. Exactly.

If we don't go into space, what the hell is the point of us as a race?

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Gunmaker finds KILLER APP for Google Glass

hplasm
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Arms race

Redneck punches 'Glasshole'

Glashole calls in air support.

Pew!Pew!

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Russians turn Raspberry Pi into fully-fledged autopilot

hplasm
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Re: black

Beaglebone Black helicopters?

Don't go there...

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Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi! 3D HOLO-PHONE hinted in Amazon vid

hplasm
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Meh

That's exactly what I was hoping to see.

Instead the ad was full of dopey looking people doing 'that' ad-amazed annoying gawp.

Second worst advert since the Surface ads...

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Please be seated at your FOUR-LEGGED PC

hplasm
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Alien

Re: Next project, build one of these for <$100

" It won't float a boat, or help it float..."

My Neutronium-hulled yacht floats very well indeed on the basalt seas of... wait!- I've said too much already...

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Former Microsoftie becomes US ambassador, opts to swear in on KINDLE

hplasm
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Paris Hilton

Re: I suppose ...

"placing one hand on a Kindle Touch"

Which then turned the page to something else...?

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LIVE TODAY: Microsoft enterprise mobility summit

hplasm
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Aha!

"... enabling them to innovate and drive competitive advantage ..."

It's an online bullshit bingo then?

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REVEALED: GCHQ's BEYOND TOP SECRET Middle Eastern INTERNET SPY BASE

hplasm
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Meh

Re: Britain's got secrets

"They know perfectly well that the public will be incandescent when they fully realise what has been going on.."

If only. The UK public would stain to reach a dim red glow, unless it's about TV or sport- on TV.

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Microsoft's NEW OS now runs on HALF of ALL desktop PCs

hplasm
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Re:The first rule of v**** is you do not talk about v**** .

The first rule of v**** is you do not use v**** .

FTFY

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ASUS launches 5-in-1 Android Windows Phone laptop tablet (breathe)

hplasm
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Windows

Re: Only if it's £35.

"That's £50 more than some people on here."

It does have Win8.x on it.

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Quantum teleportation gets reliable at Delft

hplasm
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Re: *Ahem*

Even so, you would think we could prevail against a 5HP opponent?

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Could a 'Zunewatch' be Microsoft's next hardware foray?

hplasm
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Devil

Re: not-metro

Will it have a fan in it?

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hplasm
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Re: zune

"'Z-o-o-n' That spells Zune!"

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hplasm
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Re: Zuney Bin

"The Zunewatch, as it will most certainly not be named..."

There- feel that shift in reality as the 'Zunewatch' becomes a thing?

Dosen't matter what they really call it now...

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SPB's mountaintop HQ menaced by WOLVES

hplasm
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Good news for the Tourist industry!

Seeing as wolves only attack people in fairy tales.

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The British are coming! The British are coming! And they're buying Surface fondleslabs

hplasm
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Devil

MS adopts UK Marketing strategy, ups figures-

"I say you buy one- you get one free!!"

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Google's driverless car: It'll just block our roads. It's the WORST

hplasm
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Re: Haven’t we forgotten something?

This does however, mean the car itself is free.

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Platooooooon - HALT!

"...Although the 1 second delay at a green light will, almost certainly, lead to more Google cars getting a shunt (though only if they're first at the light) as people *always* move in anticipation of lights turning green..."

Ha.

A 1 second delay is about 29 seconds faster than the dimwit at the front of the queue realising the light has changed. Multiply by the number of cars...

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100% driverless Wonka-wagon toy cars? Oh Google, you're having a laugh

hplasm
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Go

Re: Things I would like to see

" it’s going to be fun being a trucker again."

Hopefully down the dole office as truckers are the first to be replaced by Wonka-cars...

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Microsoft's 'CEO of no' on Xbox: NO SALE

hplasm
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Devil

"Bing is actually a successful product for Microsoft"

Bing! It's no Zune!!!

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It's Google's NO-WHEEL car. OMG... there aren't any BRAKES

hplasm
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Re: Total Recall

"Shouldn't there be a Johnny in the front seat?"

I'm sure there will be several...

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Disney plans standalone Star Wars movies to go with the main trilogy

hplasm
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Re: I truly HOPE the title is...

Star Wars IXa: Jar Jar Balls in a Jar Jar Ball Jar.

Ballsy but jarring...

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Bing's the thing in Microsoft's push for cheap Windows devices

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Microsoft, Bing, Windows 8.1

Having distaste for Microsoft takes no energy- it's a natural ground state.

Using their products however...

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Autodesk CEO: '3D printing has been way overhyped'

hplasm
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Devil

Re: home usage

An admirable sentiment- but much cheaper to not break your washing machine so often?

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Boeing CEO says no more 'moonshots' after 787 Dreamliner ordeal

hplasm
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Meh

Re: So, 1st big firm to openly confirm Innovation is dead

Innovation is incompatible with Executive Bonuses.

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You know all those resources we're about to run out of? No, we aren't

hplasm
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Unobtainium-

There's loads of it. But it always just moves out of reach- that's what makes it special!

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hplasm
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Great Article.

As soon as I saw the Headlines in the press, I knew they were crap- now I know exactly why, and have had confirmed for once and for all, that we as a planet, are being run by a pack of idiots.

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Concerning Windows Phone and its relevance to the larger business

hplasm
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Meh

re:" Microsoft,... is at least familiar with the needs of enterprise IT"

The needs of enterprise IT, as defined by Microsoft, are what they want them to buy, whether they need it or not.

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China to become world's No 1 economy. And we still can't see why

hplasm
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Re: Employee share options

Perhaps a lack of faith in Western companies, or at least in their management, who would sell out the whole shebang for a bonus, is to blame here?

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Google: The Internet of Things to become the Internet of ADVERTS ON YOUR THERMOSTAT

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Why is it

I agree- but I bet your watch has a maker's name on the bezel...

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: How much?

Remember- if you don't know what the product is- YOU DON'T NEED ONE.

FTFY

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hplasm
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Pirate

Re: Smart' Traction

Indeed- let the smart, rich guys spend zillions on developing the nice, reliable shiny hardware; then let the smarter smart guys rip into it and twist it to their, and our, visions of the future.

CyaogenMod-O-Stat 2000 anyone?

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hplasm
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Re: Oh goody!

"I often wonder what the difference in sales would be across the board if we went back to say the '50s."

Hat sales would go through the roof...

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Microsoft Surface 3 Pro: Flip me over, fondle me up

hplasm
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Re: Who ate all the pies?

Trusty Flickhammer!

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