* Posts by hplasm

2658 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

NSA man says agency can track you through POWER LINES

hplasm
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Big Brother

Re: New York or Los Angeles

Simple- 50Hz- not US. Record away and pile doom upon your enemies!

60Hz Probably US- Take more care- then record away. Pile doom carefully and with plausible deniability upon your enemies!

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SUPER EARTH possibly home to life FOUND in our 'solar backyard'

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Solar backyard

Perhaps a greenhouse?

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We got behind the wheel of a Tesla S electric car. We didn't hate it

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Wait, the screen is used for what?

"you get in one morning and it tells you there's been a software update and that new features are now available."

Hello- I wonder what this new stalk does...?

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Rockall pod-dweller braces for stormy weather

hplasm
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Happy

Re: 60 days of learning the harmonica

Rockall is surely the best place to send trainee harmonica players?

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Power BI: Office 365 just got more intelligent

hplasm
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Windows

Re: When M$ inevitably pulls the standard non-recurring licence desktop version of Office ...

Idiots generally rely on large numbers of Addins and Macros.

FTFY

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Microsoft to shutter security email feed on July 1

hplasm
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Coat

I'm tempted to enter the draw.

I'd like to win a $500 hat.

probably runs Win8 though.

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Maplin Electronics sold for £85m to Rutland Partners

hplasm
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Pint

Re: Vouchers

Maplin still hold the record for my fastest delivery I have ever experienced -

ordered something or other online at 2am (not much beer involved either) and it was on the doorstep by 9am The Same Morning...it was about 10 years ago though....

I was impressed.

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You need a list of specific unknowns we may encounter? Huh?

hplasm
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Thumb Up

This might just be-

the most truthiful article of all time.

Including the bit about the shouty bosses...

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Microsoft's Online Exchange fixed after going titsup for NINE HOURS

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Microsoft 101

Network Problem? Microsoft Networking (sic)? NetBIOS or NetBEUI?

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Warrantless snooping on American man was LEGAL in terrorism case, rules US judge

hplasm
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Coat

Re: Special Needs

A Jammy Dodger would be nice.

As would a Nice.

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: Special Needs

"c.) Bourbon."

That way lies trouble. Other biscuits are available. Try a HobNob?

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Study of Brit students finds TXTING doesn't ruin your writing

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Human Brain in ability to separate formal and informal communications shocker!

As any fule kno...

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EXPOSED: Massive mobile malware network used by cops globally

hplasm
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Coat

Re: Nokia 3310

If you have to but the battery into the phone, it's probably in the wrong way......

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Microsoft gets the hang of funky devices: Xbox magic for enterprise

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Quite.

" a piece of piss, on Windows"

FTFY- Obviously is describing Win8...

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Brit bank Barclays rolls out voice recog for telephone banking

hplasm
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Meh

Which system will Barclays run this on?

The Win2k or NT4Server farm?

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Google Nest slurps your life into the Matrix? The TRUTH

hplasm
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Happy

Re: I think I'm going to move to hidden cave in the mountains and become a hermit...

"I think my next project will ..."

Attract people looking for an illegal rave?

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9 Dark Social Truths That Will Totally Blow Your Bowels!

hplasm
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Coat

Re: oh ... ISIS!!!!

Pah! Splitters!!!

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hplasm
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Pint

Excellent!

Good Friday stuff!

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DON’T add me to your social network, I have NO IDEA who you are

hplasm
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Happy

Re: hmph!

'Connect with me on ButtPlugg!'

Now I have a new sig...

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Microsoft to let customers know where Office 365 is going

hplasm
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Meh

In a word-

Nowhere.

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Facebook goes TITSUP across WORLD! Who will look at your cousin's baby NOW?

hplasm
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Happy

Big plug fell out-

of the NSA rack.

Needs a kick back in. Sorted soon...

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Luxembourg patent troll suing world+dog

hplasm
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FAIL

Just say no.

Trolling the big boys- if the big boys say no, what are you gonna do?

Sue?

What if they don't pay? Stop them selling?

Once the customers get riled up, you are toast.

You are in Luxembourg, not China...

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Internet of Things fridges? Pfft. So how does my milk carton know when it's empty?

hplasm
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Happy

Re: The internet of fridges

"...you will find a lever at the top of the fridge which can be operated manually instead of by the door to switch off the light."

Only when the door is open...

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How practical is an electric car in London?

hplasm
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Happy

Re:screw that

I also want a flux capacitor, and I want it six months ago, just before the thunderstorm.

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CIA rendition jet was waiting in Europe to SNATCH SNOWDEN

hplasm
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re:Fotherington-Thomas

utterly...

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: Needs a jingle.

Battery (to the nipples) included.

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SLOW DOWN: Insecure-by-design software on road

hplasm
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Mushroom

Not to mention-

Bloody "Queue Caution"

it means NOTHING!

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Silent, spacious and... well, insipid: Citroën's electric C-Zero car

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Thoughts

"Legislation is coming in to stipulate that electric cars must make a car-like noise..."

No- electric cars should go quietly 'veep-veep-veep-veep' as they go bu. q.v The Jetsons.

Or have no wheels.

*edit*

EEK- Alan Brown beat me to it... :)

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UK govt 'tearing up road laws' for Google's self-driving cars: THE TRUTH

hplasm
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Happy

Re:we drive on the left in the UK.

Yes. The left side is the right side.

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hplasm
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Alert

Re: Driverless car

"whoever an angry Assyrian deity chose to put close to the accident.."

Tiamat hates trains. Don't fuck with him.

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High power computing and awesome Chinese food? Sign me up!

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Entirely tangential

"You love Chinese food. Why not wait a while and buy more?"

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Japanese finally produce a ROBOT which isn't DEAD INSIDE

hplasm
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Happy

Re: The Daleks are coming!!!

"Can't climb stairs eh. Well that didn't stop the Daleks from ruling over half the galaxy."

They just ruled the bottom half...

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Ukrainian teen created in lab passes Turing Test – famous nutty prof

hplasm
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Happy

Re: From reading the sample above linked by DioDesign

Slightly OT... Is it DioDesign or DiodeSign?

That would thow an AI.

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Redmond is patching Windows 8 but NOT Windows 7, say security bods

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Or could it be...

Perhaps- But "the more they tighten their grip,the more systems will slip though their fingers..."

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Happy Birthday Tetris: It's flipping 30

hplasm
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Happy

Re: I am the man

Tetris: A metaphor for life.

</crushing >

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Marc Andreessen: Edward Snowden is a 'textbook traitor'

hplasm
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Big Brother

NSA- Agents everywhere...

"You have a problem with authority, Mr. Andreessen." "It seems that you've been living two lives..."

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YOU - NASA. Enough with the ROBOTS, get some PEOPLE to MARS

hplasm
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Thumb Up

Re: Humans > robots?

" Everything begins, and ends, with Humans"

This. Exactly.

If we don't go into space, what the hell is the point of us as a race?

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Gunmaker finds KILLER APP for Google Glass

hplasm
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Happy

Arms race

Redneck punches 'Glasshole'

Glashole calls in air support.

Pew!Pew!

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Russians turn Raspberry Pi into fully-fledged autopilot

hplasm
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Happy

Re: black

Beaglebone Black helicopters?

Don't go there...

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Help me Obi-Wan Kenobi! 3D HOLO-PHONE hinted in Amazon vid

hplasm
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Meh

That's exactly what I was hoping to see.

Instead the ad was full of dopey looking people doing 'that' ad-amazed annoying gawp.

Second worst advert since the Surface ads...

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Please be seated at your FOUR-LEGGED PC

hplasm
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Alien

Re: Next project, build one of these for <$100

" It won't float a boat, or help it float..."

My Neutronium-hulled yacht floats very well indeed on the basalt seas of... wait!- I've said too much already...

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Former Microsoftie becomes US ambassador, opts to swear in on KINDLE

hplasm
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Paris Hilton

Re: I suppose ...

"placing one hand on a Kindle Touch"

Which then turned the page to something else...?

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LIVE TODAY: Microsoft enterprise mobility summit

hplasm
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Happy

Aha!

"... enabling them to innovate and drive competitive advantage ..."

It's an online bullshit bingo then?

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REVEALED: GCHQ's BEYOND TOP SECRET Middle Eastern INTERNET SPY BASE

hplasm
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Meh

Re: Britain's got secrets

"They know perfectly well that the public will be incandescent when they fully realise what has been going on.."

If only. The UK public would stain to reach a dim red glow, unless it's about TV or sport- on TV.

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Microsoft's NEW OS now runs on HALF of ALL desktop PCs

hplasm
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Happy

Re:The first rule of v**** is you do not talk about v**** .

The first rule of v**** is you do not use v**** .

FTFY

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ASUS launches 5-in-1 Android Windows Phone laptop tablet (breathe)

hplasm
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Windows

Re: Only if it's £35.

"That's £50 more than some people on here."

It does have Win8.x on it.

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Quantum teleportation gets reliable at Delft

hplasm
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Happy

Re: *Ahem*

Even so, you would think we could prevail against a 5HP opponent?

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Could a 'Zunewatch' be Microsoft's next hardware foray?

hplasm
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Devil

Re: not-metro

Will it have a fan in it?

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SPB's mountaintop HQ menaced by WOLVES

hplasm
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Thumb Up

Good news for the Tourist industry!

Seeing as wolves only attack people in fairy tales.

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The British are coming! The British are coming! And they're buying Surface fondleslabs

hplasm
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Devil

MS adopts UK Marketing strategy, ups figures-

"I say you buy one- you get one free!!"

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