* Posts by hplasm

5610 publicly visible posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

The Microsoft-LinkedIn hookup will be the END of DAYS, I tell you

hplasm
Devil

Re: periodic flushing of the sub-floor

If the sub-floor is above HR/management you don't ever need to flush :)

hplasm
Devil

Re: I've worked out my way to quit IT and become a millionaire....

Don't trust tinfoil hats from Amazon or Ebay!! Fake!!! 111!!!

hplasm
Meh

Re: So that'll be another profile to delete then

Pity nobody irrelevant will know about them.

FTFY.

hplasm
Windows

"...many HR departments hire entirely by certification."

And if the certs you have aren't from MS, expect to sink below the threshold of visibility.

'I am not a lizard' Zuckerberg proclaims in public Q&A

hplasm
Happy

"...one of the Lizard People."

They all are. It's Lizards all the way down!

Users fear yet another hack as TalkTalk services go down

hplasm
Devil

Newsflash

TalkTalk to rebrand to HushHush.

Government express an interest, "Sounds very secure to me." said a minister.

Forget Game of Thrones as Android ransomware infects TVs

hplasm
Happy

Re: TV?

No, this thread is just in your imagination...

Microsoft splashes Virtual Reality-slinging 'Scorpio' Xbox

hplasm
Devil

Re: Maybe

Read that as:

"Same chip-fat going into the Surface Phone?"

Could be...

hplasm
Unhappy

Re: Rift

"...Microsoft announced their bid to make win10 the natural home of VR..."

So VR worlds will be 2D flat and grey?

Not exactly Avatar then...

Microsoft's paid $60 per LinkedIn user – and it's a bargain, because we're mugs

hplasm
Windows

Gone now.

Bye MS!

Google snubs 'dark money' questions at AGM. Shareholder power? Yeah, right

hplasm
Happy

Re: Eh?

Nancy Reagan, perhaps?

Latest Windows 10 build loves up cloud, banishes 'strange grey bar'

hplasm
Happy

Re: Strange Grey Bar?

Electric: Six- the WinX battery life remaining after updating, in minutes.

Microsoft offers Surface-as-a-Service from its own stores

hplasm
Happy

Re: Out of curiosity ...

If you call Surface cheap- you must mean diamond chips?

PC market sinking even faster than first thought, thanks to Windows 10

hplasm
Happy

Re: I wouldn't blame Windows 10

"...non-removable batteries.."

Anything is removable. Replaceable- that's another thing...

Bill Gates cooks up poultry recipe for Africans' paltry existence

hplasm
Coat

"...Crusty leftover porridge."

When your Mother told you to not to waste your crusty porridge because of starving Africans, she didn't mean send it to them...

hplasm
Happy

Re: Teching self-help

Maxim 21. Give a man a fish, feed him for a day. Take his fish away and tell him he's lucky just to be alive, and he'll figure out how to catch another one for you to take tomorrow.

<linky> http://schlockmercenary.wikia.com/wiki/The_Seventy_Maxims_of_Maximally_Effective_Mercenaries

Thanks, Howard!

Microsoft has created its own FreeBSD image. Repeat. Microsoft has created its own FreeBSD image

hplasm
Devil

Microsoft announce -

No charge for Windows 10.

Free Blue Screen of Death!

EU referendum frenzy bazookas online voter registration. It's another #GovtDigiShambles

hplasm
Meh

Re: Hire Amazon*

"Umm hmmm and how do you get around the government rules that prohibit off-shoring of personal data?"

Same way the Govt usually gets away with it.

Why everyone* hates Salesforce's Marc Benioff

hplasm
Happy

Re: Why is Hillary election propaganda being posted here?

"...a more communard approach..."

Jimmy Somerville for President?

hplasm
Devil

More Baron Frankensteins-

Fewer robber barons!

Marauding monkey blacks out Kenya

hplasm
FAIL

Electric fence?

To keep out a monkey that can trip out a whole hydro plant AND ESCAPE UNSCATHED?

Hahah!!

Belgian brewery lays 3.2km beer pipeline

hplasm
Pint

There is a vinegar factory-

next to the JW Lees brewery in Manchester oop North.

There is probably a pipeline between them, but as a non-fan of JWL beer*, I hesitate to say which way the flow goes...

*The bitter is good on chips.

Welcome to the jumbo: Axl Rose tries to take a bite out of 'Fat Axl' internet meme

hplasm
Happy

Re: "Having your cake and eating it, Register?"

I think it would be more appropriate to say Axl was having their cake and eating several other people's cakes.

FTFY

Curses- too slow...

US military tests massive GPS jamming weapon over California

hplasm
Big Brother

I'm sure the authorities here will blame.. "ya' know.. terrorists".

And they would be right- If they owned up...

Capitalize 'Internet'? AP says no – Vint Cerf says yes

hplasm
Coat

Travelling Wave Amplifier Tube was changed to Travelling Wave Tube Amplifier for some reason.

Which TWTA decided to do that?

Computerised stock management? Nah, let’s use walkie-talkies

hplasm
Happy

Re: Feet like flippers?

+1 For longest post ever.

Did read.

UK Home Office is creating mega database by stitching together ALL its gov records

hplasm
Big Brother

"I wonder how many degrees of separation there are between any of us and a known terrorist ?"

If this goes ahead, expect the number to steadily decrease down to civil unrest.

UK Home Sec makes concessions to please Snoopers' Charter opposition

hplasm
Happy

Re: Why would anyone ...

trust this obnoxious Berkshire from Hurst, Berkshire?

FTFY

FAA to test Brit drone-busting kit

hplasm
Mushroom

Re: Phalanx

"No, I don't believe you can have overkill, why do you ask?"

Maxim 37: There is no 'overkill.' There is only 'open fire' and 'I need to reload'.

'Windows 10 nagware: You can't click X. Make a date OR ELSE'

hplasm
Linux

Re: Then again...

"Why NOT just reject the upgrade and get all the manifest benefits of a modern OS? Install Linux now!"

Samsung: Don't install Windows 10. REALLY

hplasm
Gimp

But surely it's easier to whinge on forums than spend 20 dollars to fix the issue.

Even 'free' Windows needs even more money throwing at it to make it work, then?

Sad.

Jaxa's litany of errors spun Hitomi to pieces

hplasm
FAIL

So-

Even if it hadn't broken up, it was already broken?

Microsoft warns of worm ransomware, finds fix in Windows 10 upgrade

hplasm
Meh

How very...

...convenient.

Systemd kills Deb processes

hplasm
Holmes

I haven't noticed this yet-

Oh wait, I moved to Devuan...

Surface Book nightmare: Microsoft won't fix 'Sleep of Death' bug

hplasm
Devil

Re: BIOS

Do MS do the BIOS, too?

Oh yes...

Feds raid dental flaws dad

hplasm
Big Brother

FBI

Federal Bureau of Intimidation.

Bloody Stasi wannabes.

Microsoft won't back down from Windows 10 nagware 'trick'

hplasm
Joke

Re: the craziest thing about it is

"We would be praising them."

Who you calling 'we' paleface? </Tonto>

hplasm
Devil

Re: From Microsoft dialog boxes UI guidelines....

"It can't be an enjoyable department to work in."

Why shouldn't they suffer too?

hplasm
Devil

Re: Upgrade losses

"I've moved several ex-friends to Win10 on purpose..."

FTFY...

hplasm
Facepalm

MS couldn't even jump the shark properly-

without getting eaten.

And people still give them money.

Enablers.

I know winX is free. So is the clap- but easier to avoid.

US nuke arsenal runs on 1970s IBM 'puter waving 8-inch floppies

hplasm
Boffin

Re: well...

Don't forget the half-dozen or so HP(?) programmable calculators velcro'ed onto the dashboard to show the next AOS* for the approaching ground stations when orbiting.

* Aquisition of Signal- when the next Big Dish comes up over the horizon and can be used.

Microsoft's Windows Phone folly costs it another billion dollars

hplasm
Devil

Re: Surely some sort of confusion?

Non-working props? I suppose they count as 'market share'.

And have more apps...

hplasm
FAIL

Re: It's a shame

"Yep. Windows 10 Mobile is Betamax to Android's VHS."

Haha. Betamax was good. And people bought it.

Try again- oh, no, don't bother...

hplasm
Meh

" He decided to jump."

Then, eventually, sank without trace.

Former Sun CEO Scott McNealy has data on 1/14th of humanity

hplasm
Devil

Let's all send Scott-

lots of Golf Sale ads! Gotta check them all out!

G4S call centre staff made 'test' 999 calls to hit performance targets

hplasm
Facepalm

Re: Criminals can go straight-

Read the post- 'ex-cops' is a clue to the clueless.

hplasm
Paris Hilton

Criminals can go straight-

Why can't bent ex-cops? (rental or otherwise).

The ‘Vaping Crackdown’ starts today. This is what you need to know

hplasm
FAIL

Re: About time

I'm tired of seeing AC trolls flaunt their filthy addiction in public. It's a disgusting habit as is smoking.

'Acts of war in a combat zone are not covered by your laptop warranty'

hplasm
Happy

Re: Bullshit.

Bullshit happens all the time.

hplasm
Devil

Re: It's not "Help Desk"

It's not "ITIL"

It's PHB Wank.