* Posts by hplasm

4015 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Killer ChAraCter HOSES almost all versions of Reader, Windows

hplasm
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Devil

Compared to this...

Heartbleed? Tis but a fleshwound.

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Amazon enrages authors as it switches to 'pay-per-page' model

hplasm
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Headmaster

Re: Use Large Fonts.

The original 'word count' used by publishers was 1 page per 250 words of 10pt Courier.

Many other 'standards' now exist...

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This whopping 16-bit computer processor is being built by hand, transistor by transistor

hplasm
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Meh

Re: Really?

"Some people have far too much spare time and money on their hands!"

Yes, and spend them on Sky TV and paying for footy millionaire's cars.

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hplasm
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Thumb Up

Re: Yes!

I seem to remember a ladybird book ( I think) with a computer made from wood and OC71 germanium transistors, and some dairy/milk Co series* of many-how to booklets that did the same sort of thing.

Where are these sort of things now...?

*can't find them on Goog - they were thin, square and white, with blue titles etc.

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SpaceX gets ready to crash barge-land ANOTHER rocket

hplasm
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Coat

"... hole in the middle of the Round House."

TB3...

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hplasm
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Happy

"...WITHOUT BURNING ANY OF THE DECK CHAIRS."

Version 3...

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hplasm
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Joke

re:Thunderbirds Are GO

That's version 2.

(Not V2, that lands much harder on the house)

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RBS sticks it to customers once again as IT woes continue

hplasm
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Black Helicopters

Won't all of these cock-ups

drop the share price to a suspiciously low level.

Just before the Govt sells them off...

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Microsoft sez soz over Windows 10 'freebie' balls-up

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Free for a year

Then turns (back) into a pumpkin.

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Anakin Skywalker chased by cops, crashes podracer into tree

hplasm
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Meh

Whilst driving-

was the defendant heard to say "Wheee!" ?

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hplasm
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Happy

"...Jar jar binks was shot and killed in a 7-11 robbery."

Nothing to see here, move along. Move along."

/waves hand.

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Police robot duo storm Colorado house, end four-day siege

hplasm
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Paris Hilton

Why did they want to re-arrest him?

Beacuse nobody was home to look after him???

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Microsoft U-turns on 'free' Windows 10 upgrade promise for ALL previewers

hplasm
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Happy

"You can happily use Windows"

Citation needed.

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Sun like it hot: Philae comet probe wakes up, phones home again

hplasm
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Re: Not Necking Celery

just hope they DO find a black obelisk.....

FTFY

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Open-source Linux doesn't pay, said no one ever at Red Hat

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Even if it doesn't pay.

"...If you can't deal with change...waahhh"

SystemD is like paying in Euro and getting your change in Peso.

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Raspberry Pi guys want you to go topless in the heat

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Why the long decision process?

yum toast, or yum dead-badger?

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hplasm
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Linux

Why the long decision process?

Surely it can't be hard to choose between a gutted toaster and a hollowed out dead badger?

apt-get coat...

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Sharing Economy latest: Women's BREAST MILK is the new 'liquid GOLD' of the internet

hplasm
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Coat

Re: Mmm...

Pull the udder one...

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hplasm
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"...wouldn't the milk have to be pasteurised?"

Pasteurised is best- but I don't care if it just comes up to my chest!

/Ernie

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Microsoft unzips $120,000 in FREE gizzits for cloudy upstarts

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Getting 'free' stuff from Microsoft...

You get stuffed -for free!

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NatWest IT cock-up sees 600,000 transactions go 'missing'

hplasm
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Meh

Re: It'll keep happening....

Because to fix it costs money, and Exec Yachts must get forever bigger. ^H^H^H^H^H show growth year on year...

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hplasm
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Happy

"...I have been there wearing a Morticia wig a couple of times, for no particular reason."

I saw you there. Nice legs.

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The insidious danger of the lone wolf control freak sysadmin

hplasm
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Devil

Re: It happens

Pour petrol on it.

"That xxx? Oh Tim's dealing with it. Project Y? Tim's dealing with it. Bog's blocked?- go and see Tim."

Watch the burnout.

Mwahahaha!!

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Apple seeks fawning 'journalists' for in-house 'news' self pluggery

hplasm
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Happy

R C-J

Darn - beat me to it!

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/correspondents/rorycellanjones

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POD RACING: SpaceX will build the Hyperloop railgun tube-way – you bring the ride

hplasm
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Happy

Re: No human will ride

Each pod must contain 1 (one) cheese.

Also: This ain't no train- it's a test-bed magneti-gun spaceship launcher!

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Bing to encrypt search traffic by default

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Bing

Bing has search traffic?

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OPEN WIDE: Microsoft Live Writer authoring tool going open source

hplasm
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Meh

Re: What licence?

"So you go straight to 'Trap' without waiting to see what occurs rather than actually looking at the direction Microsoft do seem to be taking now-a-days?"

Safest bet.

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Microsoft says its latest, dodgy Windows 10 build is good for (almost) everyone

hplasm
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Devil

"my car makes a really terrible boat..."

Mi Crosoft makes a really terrible Operating System.

FTFY

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In memoriam: Christopher Lee, Hammer's Count Dracula

hplasm
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Unhappy

R.I.P Prince of Darkness

And all your other excellent characters. We shall miss you.

(Insert garlic coment here after respectful pause)

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Indie review of UK surveillance laws: As you were, GCHQ

hplasm
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Stop

Re: "strong and vital powers"

"...a nice uniform with dangling runes,"

Hey- I want one of those- let the bad guys use swastikas or something that's already ruined!

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Condoleezza to China: 'The rules' mean cyber-spying isn't allowed

hplasm
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Happy

Re:WTF ?

"Sorry man - your 'Semper Fi' tat should be on your arm..."

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hplasm
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Meh

Sorry Leezzzeee

You soured your goodwill by your time with big W.

Nobody cares what you think anymore, particularly in the Civilised World.

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Gonna RUB MYSELF against the WALL: Microsoft's Surface Hub 84" monster-slab

hplasm
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Joke

Only in America...

"...the size of the screens is so unusual in today's market that Microsoft couldn't find an existing assembly line in Asia that could handle them."

Because they are specified in inches, rather than metric...

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Top Eurocop: People are OK with us snooping on their phone calls

hplasm
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Big Brother

Re: He seems to have forgotten to include

"In his mind: May == Always"

also In his mind: May == His Snooping Ally in the UK

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Life in plastic, it's fantastic: Playmobil supremo dies at 81

hplasm
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Trollface

Re: Big fucking deal

Meh - you're not anywhere close to the icon here.

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Let's kill off the meaningless concept of SW-defined storage

hplasm
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Boffin

Re: Please kill "Layer 3 Switch" as well

To be fair, Layer 3 switches understand routing (to a certain degree) whereas just Data Switches don't.

And Layer Cake switches will shoot you in the face if you try to make them route packets, whether they have a mockney accent bit set or not.

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Brit plods' post-TETRA radio omnishambles comes home to roost

hplasm
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Joke

Re: Jamming.

"And you think the Home Office aren't able to find jammers and send the operators to jail?"

I think you forgot this icon...

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Google: Our self-driving cars would be tip-top if you meatheads didn’t crash into them

hplasm
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Meh

Re: To those here hailing the arrival of Google cars

"I'm confident I can drive myself a car ..."

Nothing personal, but that right there is the heart of the problem.

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ESA shortlists three medium-sized missions for 2025 launch

hplasm
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Paris Hilton

Re: Arial

"As its a bit more 'sexy' "

That sounds a little ...fishy...

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Gremlins in the first six months? It's the seller's problem – EU court

hplasm
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Windows

Re: Windows 10

It's only free if your time is worth nothing...

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hplasm
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Devil

Windows 10

Better be up to scratch then...

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Ed Snowden should be pardoned, thunders Amnesty Int'l

hplasm
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Unhappy

Sadly

true.

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Microsoft spunks $500m to reinvent the wheel. Why?

hplasm
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Devil

Re: I object in the strongest possible terms!

"They made it triangular, with one less bump! So There!"

But with the move back towards 2D, would the MS Wheel not just be a line?

That would explain the bumpy ride...

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Plod IT spending fails to fall down the stairs as taxpayers cough £385m

hplasm
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Coat

"The body has taken four-years to get off the ground"

Did it leave behind a white outline ?

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Why did Snowden swipe 900k+ US DoD files? (Or so Uncle Sam claims)

hplasm
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FAIL

Re: I know I'm in a minority on here

" Do the deed, have the balls to face the repercussions."

said the AC...

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Windows 8.1 market share grows, Windows 7 slips, Windows 10 lurks

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Not just a service pack

"I'm not aware that there has ever been an authoritative definition of what constitutes a Windows service pack"

Different bugs, and probably more of them...

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HMRC ditches Microsoft for Google, sends data offshore

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: i bet....

Idiot MS users will, as always, hate google apps.

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: The US government

have ALWAYS been granted access to all our tax records.

FTFY

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Hackers steal files on 4 million US govt workers

hplasm
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Holmes

Begun-

This cyberwar has...

Yoda ^H^H^H^H Some crinkly Republican Congressman.

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Virgin Galactic will get into space 'within 18 months to two years'

hplasm
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Coat

Re: At 250K a pop.

""We are democratising plutocracising plutocratising space."

Dwarf-Planetising, shurely?

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