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* Posts by hplasm

2637 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Help save the endangered QUANTUM OWL, pleads Reg man

hplasm
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Unhappy

argh!

The RI server is down- hopefully the Slashdot effect of lots of people with money!

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Dongle smut Twitstorm claims second scalp

hplasm
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Megaphone

and

Keep your nose out of other peoples private conversations you nosey git!

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Oi, Microsoft, where's my effin' toolbar gone?

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Probably a memory issue

So 640k is NOT enough for Word? Seems like an MS problem right enough...

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hplasm
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Windows

Word.

People pay for this crap. (The sw, not the article).

Hilarious (Life, and the article).

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Movie, TV ads annoying? You ain't seen nothin' yet

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Clever people make. Clever people break!

I'd buy that for a dollar!

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Virgin Media boss to Osbo: Bung city fibre cash into small biz

hplasm
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Meh

Well

VM cable is already FTTC- just wait; as soon as the new BT cab fills up, it will slow to a crawl too.

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Researcher sets up illegal 420,000 node botnet for IPv4 internet map

hplasm
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Meh

Re: This is why they make prisons

I agree- Jail for all AC posters.

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National Security Letters ruled unconstitutional

hplasm
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Thumb Up

Re: The US had a regime change.

Some wrinkly Sith Senator got thrown down a shaft?

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New nuke could POWER WORLD UNTIL 2083

hplasm
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Re: Thorium is not next to worthless. It has a negative value.

let's get fracking, and I can make a killing on gas mantles!

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We shall CRUSH you, puny ROBOT... with CHESS

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Clever stuff!

...polish [your|you're] [armor|armour] for free.

Int'l version...

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Drunk driving: No more dangerous than talking on handsfree mobe

hplasm
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Big Brother

Re: Texting whilst driving leads to arrest

It's an Animal Farm reference.

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eBay: Our paid Google advertising was a total waste of money

hplasm
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Happy

Re:@Lockwood: How big was it?

One.

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Microsoft unveils even more tempting Kinect offering: Open source

hplasm
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Holmes

... Guinness World Record for fastest selling consumer electronics device:

I knew I should have got one when they came out- £25 in Asda... aha

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Self-healing chips survive repeated LASER BLASTS

hplasm
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Re: Ivor Catt should get a mention

Ouida Dogg, I seem to recall...

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Rise Of The Machines: What will become of box-watchers, delivery drivers?

hplasm
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Devil

Re: I for one welcome our new driverless cars

d) is the answer- driverless bicycles.

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: But How

It won't knock. Or indeed arrive- you will get an email saying "You were out..."

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Microsoft backs law banning Google Apps from schools

hplasm
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Re: So MS lobbying to protect their cash cow and keep Google out

That explains the Bear- he's Temporary Pope.

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Google's Wi-Fi sniffing to result in $7 million fine

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Rewardomg Bad Behaviour

You stuff a mouse up it's trunk.

Then run.

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Seattle drinking den bans Google Glass geeks

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Hmmm..

Whatever next - no droids?

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BAN SMUT, rage MEPs: Purpose of internet must be EXTERMINATED

hplasm
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Facepalm

Really?

You can't make up stuff like this- unless the EU pay you to.

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Georgia Tech proposes terabit NFC antenna

hplasm
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Boffin

How about

An orbiting THz telescope? Might be interesting stuff to see (not just alien videos...).

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BRITAIN MUST DECLARE WAR on Cervinaean menace

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Can we have some bears too?

o mi?

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Next Windows 8 version can ditch bits of Metro

hplasm
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Headmaster

Re: Making Windows 8 look like Windows 7 isn't a climbdown?

"...at least seriously read a book..."

Isn't that splitting an infinitive?

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: Making Windows 8 look like Windows 7 isn't a climbdown?

Apple generate a Reality Distortion field.

Microsoft just use a really big hammer.

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'Million-strong' zombie army devours Raspberry Pi's crunchy base

hplasm
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Re: Open Letter

I second Botty Lord for the wazzocks behind botnets!

Or Botti Boi...

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Carrie Fisher dusts off THAT bikini for Star Wars VII

hplasm
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Happy

Re: "Elderly"?

When 400 years old she is, look so good, she will not...

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Bank whips out palm-recognition kit - and a severed hand won't work

hplasm
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Happy

Re: I wonder how they tested the "will not work with a severed hand" part.

I can do better than that, I can give you Fifteen!

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Cruel Microsoft will drive us into arms of iOS, Android, warn resellers

hplasm
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Windows

Re: MS is squeezing the enterprise and channel

Don't confuse Popular with Endemic.

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SpaceX Dragon eventually snared by ISS

hplasm
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Happy

Re: It's rocket _engineering_ that's difficult.

But Rocket Surgery- that's a right swine...

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Tito's Mars mission to use HUMAN WASTE as radiation shield

hplasm
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Happy

But-

does crap even stick to aerogel?

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: @Eadon If crap stops radiation in its tracks

Mr Young asked for the "It wasn't me" kid... the customer is king.

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Microsoft Surface Pro will land in UK in WEEKS*

hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: I would buy one for the sole reason that it will annoy you.

Then it will annoy you, and you will be £1k down...

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Gosh

"so you would be buying something inferior.,"

A Surface Pro?

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So much noise on WinMob, but Microsoft's silent on lovely WinPhone

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: I'm not suprised

How can you have *fun* without a soul?

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hplasm
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Meh

Microsoft Marketing people

have souls?

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Super-fast super-massive black hole spins at nearly light-speed

hplasm
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Pint

These things-

should be the best place to find exotic matter and other space-time detritus such as we haven't a hope of replicating here. If there is an anti-gravity particle or a sub-ether wave to be found and harnessed, this is the place- if they aren't, well the future is going to be boring as Earth slowly goes back to the stone-age.

Beer- for optimism...

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Strategic SIEGE ROBOTS defeated by 'heavily intoxicated' man, 62

hplasm
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Terminator

Re: Alternative solution

Nutritional paste to the eye stalk or a fetching rubbery cloak over the top have proved to be effective in the past- or was it the future?

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Microsoft unwraps sysadmin-friendly Office 365 for biz update

hplasm
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Happy

"Facepalm because obviously..."

...Ex-Lax was taken.

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hplasm
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Windows

Re: The Preferred Business Model

Nobody wants it on those terms. Difficult for MS to stick it?

Too bad.

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: Pro Plus?!

A bit of an eye-opener...

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: TL:DR

It's Microsoft.

It's expensive.

It's value is debatable.

it smells fishy.

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Trekkies detect Spock's Vulcan homeworld ORBITING PLUTO

hplasm
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Holmes

Re: Intollerable!

Bah!

That's Tesla's Aether Propeller!

What are they teaching in the schools these days? Indeed!!

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hplasm
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Joke

How about-

Coolio?

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Nokia wants to build the Google of human behaviour - and share it

hplasm
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Meh

This sounds familiar-

Wasn't this predicted to be happening... ooh about now?

All the 'tell us who your friends are and what you are doing and we'll tell you where your tribe is meeting' things that have been pushed forward up to now just don't catch on- nobody wants tracking to that extent- and nor will this.

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Stop saying 'Cyber Pearl Harbor,' RSA boss pleads

hplasm
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Happy

Surely if it's "Cyber" (!) anything

Then it should be "Perl Harbor" (Harbour).

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That Firefox OS mobe: The sorta phone left behind after a mugging

hplasm
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Meh

Graph with *3* lines on it

One for Windows Phone 8- it's not 'success'...

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India launch puts Canadian microsats into orbit

hplasm
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Coat

Re: "places the size of wales that you would never notice if they disappeared"

Wales?

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US insurer punts 'bestiality' to wide-eyed kiddies, gasp 'mums'

hplasm
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Devil

"right- minded citizens..."

As in "your mind is as closed as ours, right?"

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Fujitsu to get oldsters out the house and thoroughly caned

hplasm
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Unhappy

"...all that is missing is a mechanism to remind you why you went there in the first place..."

That's what I would want one for!

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Climate scientists link global warming to extreme weather

hplasm
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FAIL

Re: ...some cause, X...

That would be what enlightened souls have called *the Sun* for many millenia.

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