* Posts by hplasm

3815 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

Microsoft starts switching on paid Wi-Fi service with latest Windows 10 preview

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Feaping Creaturitus

"I installed Win10 on a touchscreen AIO once, it was deeply unstable with a development environment on it, I rolled back to Win8.1."

I rest my case.

Win 10 definitely must be much worse than everyone is saying...

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Feaping Creaturitus

"Wrongly pointing out shitness in a thing that's not what you like..."

Ah- so you admit the shitness? Even your Fanboiness is slipping. Win 10 must be much worse than everyone is saying...

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hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Feaping Creaturitus

Pointing out shitness is the opposite of fanboiness.

Your blinkers are blocking your view.

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The END of WINDOWS EVERYWHERE! Is that really what Nadella wants?

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Hang on.

"A Ford or a BMW? You choose."

Or the Trabant - Like you say- no credible opposition- from WP.

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NASA chooses ace SPACE PILOTS who'll take the USA back into manned flight

hplasm
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Putin Time!

This summer! Two for One Space Launch! Much Cheapness! Book Now!!!!!

Limited Spaces available

May explode.

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PLUTO: The FINAL FRONTIER – best image yet of remote, icy dwarf planet REVEALED

hplasm
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Happy

Oh dear-

They'll see the Apollo 'Moon' film stage!

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We tried using Windows 10 for real work and ... oh, the horror

hplasm
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Gimp

"Not sure what all the complaints are about."

That's because your PC is a toy.

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hplasm
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Gimp

Not a fanboy, but...

...getting there.

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hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: Want the normal start menu...

And if you want a Peugeot 206, take any small crappy car, and get an elephant to sit on it.

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Re Odd Number Versions

"Are you sure that's not Star Trek you're thinking of?"

ALL versions of Windows are clunkers. Until just before the next one comes out. Funny, that.

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: Well,it floated my boat....

"I'm out scouring more rubbish skips for a Windows-7 or -8 licence sticker before July 28..."

Just wait- you'll get the Win 10 iso soon- in AOL disc like piles, probably.

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Chromecast gains wired Ethernet dongle

hplasm
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Boffin

Re:ain't got the grunt

The tablet's lack of voom is irrelevant to the content- it just points the Chromecast at the source, makes the introductions and then leaves it to them to play nice with each other. You can turn the initiating device off then if you want- but good luck in halting the stream if you do...

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Microsoft SLASHES 7,800 bods, BURNS $7.6bn off books in Nokia adjustment

hplasm
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Windows

Re: That Reminds Me

"It's not far from becoming Microsoft's next billion-dollar business unit."

But as yet it's close to becoming Microsoft's next billion-dollar storage unit.

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'Real' vampires reluctant to 'come out of the coffin' to social workers – barmy prof

hplasm
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Paris Hilton

"D J Williams describes his interests as including "deviant leisure, forensic leisure science..."

That is- doing weird stuff, and also sniffing the seat afterwards?

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DOUGHNUT (donut?) and whale FOUND ON PLUTO

hplasm
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Thumb Up

Excellent.

Gnome planet encounter- it's been a long time coming, and excitement is at Xmas levels!

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Bloodthirsty Microsoft prepares for imminent 'major' job cuts

hplasm
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Devil

"When will MS stop flushing monopoly cash down the toilet"

They do say "Follow the money", in this case, they are going down the drain after it!

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Dormant ALIEN SLIME LIFE frozen in SPEEDING comet will AWAKEN - boffins

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Wait...I'm seen the film Species...

Aye Sir! - Er, is that from our orbit, their orbit, or some other orbit? Targeting computer's a bit fussy...

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hplasm
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Coat

Re: This whole panspermia idea...

"I think life is created inside stars."

It's life, Nom, but not as we know it.

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hplasm
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Headmaster

Re: This whole panspermia idea...

"Life almost certainly evolved on earth."

Ah- you're confusing and conflating 'started' and 'evolved' Even the godsquads get a look-in on that error..

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Export control laws force student to censor infosec research

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Security by Obscurity wins out again,

"We would be better off restricting ^H^H^H^H^H encouraging the export of mentally retarded law makers..."

Surely...

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Another day, ANOTHER Windows 10 build for us Insiders

hplasm
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Windows

Special???

"... Surely most visitors will know what an ISO file is, and what to do with it?"

If they are that desperate, perhaps not...

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: Microsoft Wi-Fi

"... the Skype brand."

isn't that doomed by Murdoch Inc?

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Looking forward to getting Windows 10 the day it ships? Yeah, about that...

hplasm
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Re: Be the first in your street to own Windows 10!

...so get it now, and get the arrows in your front!

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Azure Australia went TITSUP for about seven hours

hplasm
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Happy

Well...

Azure IS the colour of a sky without clouds in it...

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Microsoft rushes out latest Windows 10 build. 300 fixes? Pff, whatever

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Dear Microsoft

"When you are dammed if you do and dammed if you don't, maybe you should just do what you think is best..."

i.e. Go to Hell, Microsoft?

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: Old is new

" when the glitter wears off and they discover the chocolate inner..."

...is brown, but isn't chocolate...

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hplasm
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Windows

Re: How can this be?

"You apparently have the same broken Caps Lock key problem as Eadon..."

Probably a Win 10 significant_unknown_error

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Rise of the Machines: ROBOT KILLS MAN at Volkswagen plant

hplasm
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Meh

Re: Tasteless

I find your username alarming...

/pot

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Windows 7 and 8.1 market share surge, XP falls behind OS X

hplasm
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Devil

Re: " the number "9" stands for hardship and suffering in some Asian cultures"

As does the word "Microsoft" in many Western ones.

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Linux Mint 17.2: If only all penguinista desktops were done this way

hplasm
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Windows

Re: Goodness.

If Windows 10 gets anything near this positive a review on ANY tech site next month - bias or not I'll show your arse in ASDA.

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hplasm
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Happy

"...the penguins who flood every article about windows"

Have probably used and suffered Windows.

Still a good satire though...

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Microsoft: This Windows 10 build has 'NO significant known issues'

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Hallelujah - File Explorer's file path limit is not 256 any more !

"Microsoft Stool"

Is that the internal codename for Win 10, like "Longhorn" etc?

I like it!

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hplasm
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Angel

Re: Hallelujah - File Explorer's file path limit is not 256 any more !

"That path length is substantially more than required to give a seperate folder to every atom in the universe..."

What!? Just one...? Not very far thinking, that.

edit:- What!? Just one universe...? Not very far thinking, that either!.

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Universal Credit white elephant needs 'urgent breakthrough' says MP

hplasm
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Facepalm

So many white elphants in Whitehall now.

An ivory sale could cancel the national debt.

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Windows 10 is due in one month: Will it be ready?

hplasm
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Windows

Re: Linux on the Desktop "just works"? .

"I understand the things I use all the time and thus can easily get them working to my satisfaction."

Not a Win 10 user, then?

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hplasm
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QOTW right here!

"I wouldn't trust Microsoft's updates as far as I could spit a lightly fried stoat in a bun..."

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hplasm
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Gimp

" Why would you even be remotely interested in reading a Windows 10 thread?"

Apple aren't staging a 'queue round the block' release for their zombie crew at the moment.

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Abort, abort! Metal-on-metal VIOLENCE as Google's robo-car nearly CRASHES

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Road Network (LACP)

Use full duplex- "where we;re going, we don't need lanes!" at least no more than one, for both directions ...

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hplasm
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Re: Highly suprising

Even the automated Audi dosn't have working indicators. Bet the factory just leaves the unused wiring out now to save money...

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Microsoft's new mission statement: It's all about doing MAGICAL THINGS

hplasm
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Devil

Re: We came in peace for all mankind.....

"We stand in awe of what humans dare to achieve"

We have the gall to charge you for this pile of glittercaque, and we dare you to buy it!

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Microsoft's magic hurts: Nadella signals 'tough choices' on the way

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Old rant...

"Microsoft: Do One Thing Well."

Yes they do. Take money for old rope.

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BOFH: Don't go changing on Friday evenings, I don't wanna work that hard

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Reach out...

Reach out and punch face...

/D-mode

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: Its a small change!

"I don't understand...."

Simple - no changes on a Friday, because you have to deal with the fallout on Monday.

Pre-booked *annual-leave somewhere inacessable, on the other hand...

* it pays to keep up with the Change Management schedule, well in advance :)

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SpaceX to blast Microsoft's HoloLens visors into SPAAAAACE

hplasm
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Meh

Hmpf!

""Remote Expert Mode" will link the astronauts via Skype to technicians on the ground, who will then be able to see what's going on in the ISS and draw annotative notes that can be used to guide repairs (for example)."

"Remote Expert Mode" will sometimes link the astronauts via Skype to technicians on the ground, when the stars are right, who will then occasionally be able to see what's going on in the ISS, but sometimes just hear noises accompanied by what seems to be a slowly changing picture from the lunar surface circa Apollo 11, and then draw annotative notes that could be used to guide repairs if they were not strangely locked in sharepoint, and have to be retrieved from the Russian or Chinese (or Brazillian) space scientists whose governments got them from the NSA backup (for example).

FTFT...

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Samsung caught disabling Windows Update to run its own bloatware

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Solution

What!? And let all the Winfans get their grubby mitts all over it!!!???!! 1111tyone!

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hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: Surprise, surprise, surprise

"good, and for the 99.99% of the rest of the world who are not Techies?"

They won't be reading this...

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hplasm
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Pint

Re: solution?

You READ the EULA ?

Have another pint!

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Killer ChAraCter HOSES almost all versions of Reader, Windows

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Quote from Wikipedia:

"I like the way you think but actually it's "straw"."

Mostly horseshit then?

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hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: Compared to this...

"Good try but ..."

I think you need to read it again, perhaps?

Compared to this, Heartbleed IS but a fleshwound...

/whoosh

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Wake up, sheeple! If you ask Siri about 9/11 it will rat you out to the police!

hplasm
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Happy

Re: I clicked on the article. You won't believe what happened next!

Did he shit bricks?

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