* Posts by hplasm

3915 posts • joined 10 Jul 2009

MySQL daddy Widenius: Open-source religion won't feed MariaDB

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Advert supported

Aiee! Access 10?

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Your wget is broken and should DIE, dev tells Microsoft

hplasm
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Meh

Re: If only ...

"...the expense of creating, testing and debugging their own versions."

Well one out of three is something...

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hplasm
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Happy

Wow, every single sentence in your post is a little gem of stupidity.

Where 'little gem' is an alias for Kohinoor Diamond

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Sex ban IT man loses appeal – but judge labels order 'unpoliceable'

hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: Why did the medical staff snitch?

"..."may" of..."

Off topic but...

FFS!

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hplasm
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Terminator

I'm the law in this here town, boy.

*spit* ding.

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UK's mass-surveillance draft law grants spies incredible powers for no real reason – review

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Will Godefrey And another thing

"You really think your prattling would be of any interest to anyone? "

Why not? You do.

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hplasm
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Facepalm

Re: Poor sods.

" I went to a privileged university with some of Them."

And if someone said to Them that you might be the next Kim Philby...?

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hplasm
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Big Brother

Re: Poor sods.

I don't.

Hope they sleep well.

No, I don't...

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Radio astronomy pioneer dies at 92

hplasm
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Unhappy

Another Bruce (S)lee gone

Another master sadly missed.

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Systemd adds filesystem mount tool

hplasm
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Mushroom

Do one thing, Poettering-

Fuck Off- and do it well.

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Windows 10 Anniversary Update completely borks USB webcams. Yay.

hplasm
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Gimp

Oh and don't tell me I have to get new Apps.

Ok then.

(Apps are for toys.)

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: Windows 10 = Windows Vista

Close.

Windows 10 = Windows Vista Plus

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hplasm
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Gimp

Re: MS is in decline, but Linux will never replace it

Whether you work in IT for years,or not, installing Windows on any platform/brand has always been a crap shoot. It either works, or it wont and there is no fix for it, unless you are willing to pay for it yourself or wait until Redmond get round to it.

There- FTFY

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hplasm
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Devil

Re: All fine

"Sew up your anus. Quick. While you still can."

Wow. The hoops you have to jump through to run Windows these days...

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hplasm
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WTF?

Re: The beginning of the end

""Linux is in the hands of the "developers" and they don't care about end users."

rather

"Microsoft is in the hands of the "developers" and they don't care about end users."

Didn't you get the memo, forced down your throat?

Or are you still on XP?

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Microsoft’s Continuum: Game changer or novelty?

hplasm
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Coat

Re: Oooerrr HP

Happy-Like a dog with two docks?

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My headset is reading my mind and talking behind my back

hplasm
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Childcatcher

Re: Yellow 'sunglasses'

Yellow 70's style sunglasses make you look like Bono.

Not good....

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: Fat-Burning Hats

"Well... Except Skegness..."

But...its so bracing!

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UK IT consultant subject to insane sex ban order mounts legal challenge

hplasm
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Meh

Re: So,

"at what point do we officially recognise that 'guilty until proven innocent' is a thing of the past?"

You mean- 'a thing of the present'?

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Microsoft promises free terrible coffee every month you use Edge

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Wrong data

In the Appstore? Oh wait- that's the empty wasteland in WinApp world, isn't it?

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Windows Phone dives into irrelevant-like-BlackBerry territory

hplasm
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Holmes

Re: Just wait until the Surface Phone

Is that the other can on the end of the tramp's string? Aha...

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Five-hour Azure wobble

hplasm
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Facepalm

Did they have to...

...turn it off and on again?

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Windows 10 needs proper privacy portal, says EFF

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Thank you!

"I enjoyed today's two-minute hate on MSFT!"

You were late...

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Wearable fart generator

hplasm
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Happy

Re: But .. But ...

That Virtual Dog, again?

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hplasm
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Coat

When it is running

- does it make a faint hum?

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Happy Anniversary: What’s new, what’s missing in Microsoft’s giant mobile update

hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Skype on Winphone 8.1

"Go for it hope you enjoy playing with toys"

No, he's moving away from Windows.

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BT best provider for 10Mbps USO, says former digi minister Ed Vaizey

hplasm
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Meh

Has-been talks bollocks.

Film at eleven.

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Microsoft to overhaul Windows 10 UI – with a 3D Holographic Shell

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Shitting crikey

"I don't remember "Fly Fishing" having that much swearing in it."

It was withdrawn from general sale, I understand...

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: If it at least came...

"...in a convenient suppository format!"

Wouldn't it just be Win10?

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: The glorious future

"Those who complain of nausea will be entered into an obligatory intense ipecac-based training program."

So spawning the next installation downloads of Windows.

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hplasm
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Big Brother

So-

Now the NSA*/AdMongers will be able to see what you are doing, too!

*Other spy TLAs are available.

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We're going to bring an asteroid fragment into Lunar orbit

hplasm
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Coat

Re: What can go wrong?

"Andromeda strain?"

No, I pulled a hamstring.

*baboom-tish*

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Colour us shocked: ISPs not that keen to sign up for Universal Service Obligation

hplasm
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Devil

Re: Universal Service

"Do you see BT burying fibre 6" underground along the pavement?"

No, I usually see them sitting on a little stool in a little stripy tent scratching their head because a week ago they were driving a delivery van.

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Physicists believe they may have found fifth force of nature

hplasm
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Holmes

I've often thought stupidity is a fundamental force of nature.

Inertia for the intellect.

Hence- "They are quite dense." etc.

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hplasm
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Re: Oh come on, we know that other force..

Damn! The strongest of all the forces!

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hplasm
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Alien

Re: Matter/antimatter vs "regular"/"dark" matter

"I have come from a dark matter world to probe some arse"

Sounds like marketing speak, to me.

Hide.

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Some Windows 10 Anniversary Update: SSD freeze

hplasm
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Meh

Re: Proxy

I'm not angry- just because you don't understand networking, after all neither does Microsoft.

You are correct about your grammar, it does make you look a bit dim, when coupled with your zealotry.

You have my sympathy, however.

Perhaps Clippy can assist?

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hplasm
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Headmaster

Would of...!!!

How can anyone take the rest seriously after that?

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hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Where are all the MS apologists?

"Rather like a someone who keeps stalking his ex-girlfriend's facebook to insist that he's totally over her, and life has been so great since he left, and he's not fixated on her and he's happy tell everyone so, repeatedly."

No man, she's your girlfriend, and we actually said she was a dog.

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Why doesn't Win10 support multiple drives better

"Yes, trying to use Windows as an OS won't work, believe me."

FTFY

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hplasm
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Gimp

Re: Leaving Microsoft

"You have not used Microsoft for 10 years so your opinion is useful BECAUSE ?"

He's no fool?

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Farewell Patch Tuesday fragmentation: from October, MS will roll just one monthly patch

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Then when a fox borks something...

You have to install hounds from the Appy Store!

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hplasm
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Meh

Re: Xbox...

"PCs just aren't Xboxes."

Yet.

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London cops waste £2.1m on thought crime unit – and they want volunteer informers

hplasm
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Re: Proposed new crime

"Using social media with intent?

What about caravans?"

No signal in them.

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hplasm
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Happy

Re: High Inquisitor

Dolores (May) Umbridge. Nee Palpatine.

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Baffled Scots cops call in priest to deal with unruly spirits

hplasm
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Coat

Re: It's happening already.

"I reckon the mark of an angry deity is almost certainly a chihuahua on a hedge."

And a dim looking fat red cat- oh, sorry I thought you said 'on the edge'...

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A Russian cyber-gang, the Oracle MICROS hack, and five more POS makers in crims' sights

hplasm
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Holmes

Re: POS

Cashier? In a cashless transaction...

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Business users force Microsoft to back off Windows 10 PC kill plan

hplasm
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Happy

Re: Windows Beta

To be fair- he may be using Win10 Enterprise.

Only spies during office hours...

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Thieves can wirelessly unlock up to 100 million Volkswagens, each at the press of a button

hplasm
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Devil

Volkswagen is the People's Car

So not like MS then.

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hplasm
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Windows

Re: Look to the future

A whole new raft of problems there.

The doors probably stay wide open, for starters...

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