* Posts by Rich 11

284 posts • joined 8 Jul 2009

Page:

Queen's Speech: Snoopers' Charter RETURNS amid 'modernisation' push

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Measures will also be brought forward to promote social cohesion

That and I quite like the idea of my messages only being read by the intended recipient.

Ah, so you have something to hide!

*cracks knuckles*

4
1

NASA picks tools for voyage to possibly LIFE-SUPPORTING moon Europa

Rich 11
Bronze badge

You should imagine Vivian Stanshall reading this list

You should imagine Viv Stanshall when reading any list.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8DUEAG5eO6c

2
0

Chap mines Bitcoin with PUNCH CARDS and ancient mainframe

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: That's nothing...

But if each instance of the operator across 10^500 universes were to have a go...

Yay, quantum abacus!

3
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Till the sun explodes...

Yes, but the explosion's current expansion rate is far too slow to be much fun.

3
0

DDoS attack downs University of London learning platform

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: "A harsh lesson, now stand in corridor for four hours"

Halogen Days? Wasn't that the prog rock band which emerged from their hippy-era incarnation, Halcyon Days?

3
0

Last flying Avro Vulcan, XH558, prepares for her swan song

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Part of the UKs unique aviation heritage

I took my American uncle to Cosford once, years ago. Johnny was a WW2 veteran and was always happy to reminisce. We were looking at one of the flying bombs, when Johnny turned to an elderly gentleman standing next to him and said, "God, I remember how afraid I used to be whenever I heard one of these cut out in the sky above me!" The man replied, "Ja?"

8
0

US Air Force reveals what's inside its top-secret space plane, this time

Rich 11
Bronze badge

www.100milehighclub.xxx

Apologies if that actually resolves to anything NSFW.

7
0

Ex 'Tech City' chief Shields appointed junior Fun minister for internet safety

Rich 11
Bronze badge

How the heck do people like this manage to fail so often and still stay employed?

Friends in low places.

5
0

All hail Mad Frankie Maude, noble Lord of Cabinet Office Axemen

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Creator of GDS

Situation normal.

0
0

HORDES OF CLING-ONS menace UK.gov IT estate as special WinXP support ends

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: err, what?

Just reverse the polarity of the neutron flow. That'll fix it.

0
0

Facebook echo chamber: Or, the British media and the election

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: How about...

I'm quite happy to disagree with people without seeing them as stupid or evil or both. It's when they do things like drive sick people to kill themselves because a disability assessment is made insanely harsh, or deny jobseekers money for food for being five minutes late to an interview because the bus broke down that I start to think they are evil.

14
1
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: @AC

I would suggest to start that any person claiming Job Seekers Allowance must work between 1+ days a week in some form on government service, be it sweeping streets, picking litter, painting, weeding, cutting grass, data entry etc....

You mean paying people less for jobs which, if they need doing, should actually be created and funded properly? Yeah, that's a well thought out way of getting people back into work...

22
3
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: @AC (the fucking idiot) @fruitoftheloon

I'm surprised no mention of Labour's bright idea of using PFI hasn't been made yet.

Probably because it was a Tory 'bright idea', which the despicable New Labour ran with because they didn't have the balls to put up taxes to pay for essentials like hospital and school buildings which didn't leak after a decade of being run down by the despicable Tories.

14
4

Theresa May: Right, THIS time we're getting the Snoopers' Charter in

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: That MP...

Has there ever been a liberal home sec? Not in my memory. Certainly not since the 80's.

Not in the 80s either. I remember seeing Douglas Hurd at the side of the road one Sunday morning as he mobilised the police to break up a party miles from anywhere, and the bastard was grinning from ear to ear.

20
1

Weird ARCHAEAN LIFE FORM found at 'Loki's Castle' DEEP beneath Arctic Circle

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Lokis' Castle in the Atlantic deeps?

I was hoping they'd found Jormungandr.

0
0

The Internet of things is great until it blows up your house

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Um...

so whether they used a smart electric blanket in Melbourne or Moscow, they would get the very same great night’s sleep

If you'd ever stayed in a Moscow hotel you'd know an electric blanket is quite unnecessary. They're so overheated that I had to open the window to let in some nice, refreshing -10C air*.

* This can lead to the temptation to generate a vodka coat, though.

0
0

VOTERS! This Election: Vote #Smart, Vote #Digital

Rich 11
Bronze badge

HMRC also do not have a public email address for correspondence and currently have an 8 week backlog of post, confirmed by their call centre manager last week.

That's because they've sacked almost all of their mailroom staff to meet efficiency savings targets, having heard that post is on the way out because we're all using this new-fangled email thingy now...

3
0

UK exam board wants kids to be able to Google answers

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Exams?

He argues that in everyday life, pupils will be free to use Google and that this “open book” approach should be extended to examinations, arguing that examinations are about understanding and interpretation

Then why have exams*? In everyday life since starting full-time work I've never needed to write six essay-style answers in three hours flat.

* I may be biased, since I never could cram for exams and always did worse in them than in any course work.

13
1

BATWINGED DINO-PIGEON causes FLAP in bone-boffinry circles

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Petrosaurs?

What are petrosaurs?

Rock lizards. They fly like a brick.

3
0

Brits send Star Wars X-wing fighter to the stratosphere

Rich 11
Bronze badge

clone out the strings

We can do without any mention of the word 'clone' in a Star Wars context.

18
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Here's an interesting poser that I have posed elsewhere.

As the saying (originally about the F-4 Phantom, I believe) goes, "with enough thrust, you can get a brick to fly".

To fly, but not necessarily be stable. The Phantom's polyhedral wings were at least symmetrical. I think an X-Wing's wing symmetry would cause it to pitch badly.

0
0

Oxford chaps solve problem in 1982 Sinclair Spectrum manual

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Good times, those

In 1000 years some copyright shill will claim copyright to the music and and a patent troll will emerge to claim ownership of the audio encoding scheme.

No. They'll be first up against the wall when the revolution comes.

14
0

Smile! Brit transport plods turn bodycams on travelling public

Rich 11
Bronze badge

An outsource service?

0
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Wonder if the cameras work that well

Best of both worlds, maybe. Well, as long as you wear dark glasses and a false beard.

0
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Or the politicians for setting them up

And, not or.

5
0

New EU security strategy: Sod cyber terrorism, BAN ENCRYPTION

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Reduce terrorism...

Erm.. EU Commissioners are appointed, not elected.

It wasn't EU commissioners who started an illegal war, had no plans for dealing with the aftermath and generally just laid fertile grounds for al Quaeda, ISIS and their ilk to flourish. You'll probably need to look a little closer to home for that.

8
0

'Use 1 capital' password prompts make them too predictable – study

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Trust

Then write down that password on an anonymous and otherwise blank piece of paper and leave it in that decorative tea-pot your mother has.

You mean the one I keep her ashes in?

3
0

Top Spanish minister shows citizens are thick as tortillas de ballenas

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Pedanting...

Are we eating our parents?

No, just our cousins. Unless, of course, there's something you want to own up to...

1
0

China tackles vital strippers-at-funeral problem

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: @Ian Emery (was: Fantastic idea, I have already booked some for my funeral.)

Well, the authorities could prosecute if they wish, but he wont care.

They might have trouble working out where to send the summons.

1
0

Fed-up Colorado man takes 9mm PISTOL to vexing Dell PC

Rich 11
Bronze badge

There's such a thing as a rational faith in homeopathy?

15
0

It's official: David Brents are the weakest link in phishing attacks

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Just thinking ...

Yeah. We see a disproportionate number of new staff falling prey to phishing, usually the ones who haven't yet been to an induction day.

0
0

Neurobabble makes nonsense brain 'science' more believable

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Caps

no. not true.

1
0

WW2 German Enigma machine auctioned for record-breaking price

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: And should Cameron win...

At this stage I'm already wishing we'll end up like Belgium. Going without a goverment for the best part of a year didn't seem to do them much harm. The beer still kept flowing...

9
0

Lib Dem manifesto: Spook slapdown, ban on teen-repelling Mosquitos

Rich 11
Bronze badge

And I shall tell their canvasser when/if they come to my door.

I told that to their local party boss when he came knocking last year. Going by the expression on his face I'm sure I wasn't the first he'd heard it from that day.

0
0

Bloke hits armadillo AND mother-in-law with single 9mm round

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Varmint?

so to me this amounts to wonton killing of the animals.

That would be one way of putting them on a plate.

3
0

The Internet of Stuff is a gigantic ultra-perv robbery network – study

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: My fridge

All told, it's probably easier, safer and more reliable to train the cat to feed itself and to put a can of beer in the fridge for you if you're not home by 6pm.

1
0

EU Commish mulls new bloc-wide rule on web content takedowns

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Did he send you a free packet of fags?

1
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Putting aside any block put into place because of criminal investigations or proceedings, how does this relate to the 'adult' filters that ISPs seem to be so keen for their customers to enable and use?

...

This is censorship with no oversight whatsoever, but I guess since it's 'for the children' this makes it all OK.

It's censorship with parental oversight. The parents can lift it any time.

I don't disagree with your point that the filters may be matching too greedily, just that the two issues aren't really related.

1
0

Operation Redstone: Microsoft preps double Windows update in 2016

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: Windows-as-a-Service

Lots of people won't see things that way - they pay for everything else monthly, with no ultimate ownership.

Yeah, the poor bastards have grown up to be well and truly monetarized.

3
0

700,000 beautiful women do the bidding of one Twitter-scamming man

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Start a religion

I wonder which religion your downvoter follows?

2
0

Bongfire of Inanity: Jakarta rozzers enforce mass chill-out

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Smoky delight

This reminds me of a report in an Australian newspaper from about 20 years ago, of an incident where the cops got the local fire brigade to help them safely burn a huge stash of weed. Three firefighters were later disciplined for "inhaling through the sides of their respirators".

5
0

Amazon cloud threatens to SMASH the fundamental laws of PHYSICS

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Infinite?

Maybe Amazon have developed C-space, the cloudy equivalent of L-space.

Still prefer L-space.

3
0

Make up your mind: Microsoft puts a bullet in Internet Explorer after all

Rich 11
Bronze badge

It's probably the civil service's fault as much as the politicians. I rather suspect they make all the real decisions, no matter what party is in power.

Well, of course. The Civil Service wouldn't want to leave anything important up to the amateurs, would they?

0
0

SCARESTEROID of the week to miss Earth on Friday

Rich 11
Bronze badge

If we get really lucky...

...an asteroid just large enough to destroy a building will strike the Daily Express and spare us all from their inanity.

1
0

Woman caught on CCTV performing drunken BJ blew right to privacy

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Re: I feel sorry for her unborn kid

"Hello, little darling. Mummy wants to tell you all about her 15 minutes of fame."

1
2

UK.gov crackpots: Let's build vapourware-based sharing economy CITIES

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Subversive

Mark Field, Conservative MP for Cities of London & Westminster, said in a Parliamentary debate last week that it was "essentially a front for a commercial campaign".

He said: "Frankly, it is akin to setting up a trade body of payday lenders to dictate financial services policy. I am sorry that the wool is being pulled over the minister’s eyes as these self-professed independent voices dictate a commercially advantageous landscape.”

He sounds far too sensible to be in the Tories. That or his City constituency backers are running scared.

15
0
Rich 11
Bronze badge

Share this!

Whitehall should also "lead by example" by getting civil servants "to use sharing economy solutions to book accommodation and transport when travelling on official business".

Never mind Whitehall, let's start with Downing Street. Next time Call Me Dave wants to visit the far-flung corners of his empire, he can cadge a lift up the M1 and sit in the back of Stanislaw's white van, sharing a bottle of kupnik and a joint with Stan's chippies.

8
0

Not in the Budget: Spooks beg UK.gov for £111m brown envelope

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Budget-smugglers

I wish my budget worked in a way which allowed for the addition of 'supplementary estimates'.

4
0

Atomic keyrings: Just how bright are they?

Rich 11
Bronze badge

As much as I'd like a gadget powered by evil radiation (at least that's what I'd tell people, just to see how many freak out), I cancelled my purchase when I got to the checkout and saw the shipping cost. It made me feel like I was being ripped off. Shame on you, El Reg.

6
0

Internet Explorer LIVES ON, cackle sneaky Microsoft engineers

Rich 11
Bronze badge

Browser warts

Microsoft has to keep IE going because so many enterprise customers still use it, with version six still being run internally for some processes, but it's a pain in the backside for Redmond because there's so much legacy code in there that the browser is sluggish and patching problematic.

That's what you get for winning the browser war and then sitting on your hands, muttering 'La-la-la! Can't hear you' for too long. I have no sympathy for them -- I'll reserve that for those of us who've had to live with their dull complacency and arrogance.

6
1

Page:

Forums