Posts by Big-nosed Pengie

It's what?

One-dimensional? Then it truly is the most remarkable invention of all time! An imaginary mathematical construct made real! Anything one-dimensional would have zero mass and, of course, it would be invisible. You could stack an infinite number of them in your shirt pocket.

The world's energy problems have been solved!

"Gifts"

"Gifts" has become the new "leveraged".

Bloody illiterates.

Is it anatomically correct?

If not why not?

She is.

Did anyone notice?

Paris - we'd notice if she went away.

@AC re Quietube

0_o

Brilliant! Thanks!

@Alastair 7

"Can someone please explain to me the situation whereby I would need the size, dimensions and processing power of every Apple computer ever built to be available in the palm of my hand?"

Fanboi1: "The Apple Turdbox 3000, released at 4.37pm on the third of January 1987 was 31.256cm wide."

Fanboi2: "I can't believe the depth of your ignorance. Everyone in the universe knows that it was 31.257cm wide. You should be banned from ever owning another Apple product."

Fanboi1: (Checks iPhone app - notes that it was 31.245cm wide. Both kill themselves out of shame.)

If I were a developer...

I'd ask myself whether I wanted my stuff to poterntially reach either 100% of users or 70-60% and falling.

If I chose the former I doubt that I'd be a developer for much longer.

Great idea!

Put Windwoes on all those PCs, train and employ an army of people to go and clean out the porn and malware on each PC three or four times a week, teach people how to use them, repair the broken ones, etc. For each free PC provided to an unemployed person you'll need about three trained MCSEs. Everybody wins!

More power to them!

It's about time someone threw the book at these bastards.

Adults of legal age should be able to do anything they like providing it doesn't hurt anyone else, but it should be both informed and consensual. These bastards do everything they can to ensure that it's neither.

Problem solved

I have an anti-gravity device based on magnets and hot air. Who'd like to invest?

What a bloody schemozzle!

It makes me long for the simpler days when all I had to choose between was Beta/VHS or Blu-Ray/Whateverthatotherthingwas. This idiotic plethora of incompatible formats - brought about entirely by the equally idiotic plethora of DRM systems - will kill any e-book reader that won't read any format that's thrown at it. The sooner the better.

Um...

What?

You buy our shite...

...we own you. What more do you need to know? You don't like it? Don't fucking buy it, retards.

Do not want

That is all.

It was undoubtedly god's punishment

for putting the north pole in Alaska.

My entry

Microsoft tries hard

to distribute their shite, but

must give it away.

Yet more proof

that Jobs is more evil than Ballmer. Bring it on!

@AC

""warning rogue software often contained malware"

Yeah, well they would say that, wouldn't they? "

No, no - they're absolute right! It contains Windows!

Title

The day that I ditched Mickey$haft for Linux counts as one of the most wonderful days of my life.

ROTFLMAO

That is all.

Brazil?

Clearly this is a different Brazil to the one of the Girl from Ipanema, Carnivale, topless beaches etc.

Jezuz, people!

I have no love for the JesusPhone, and dramatically less for Apple, which I consider to be, if not the Devil incarnate, then at least a large collection of his demons.

But if I drop my pants in the middle of Main Street, bend over, and hold up a sign saying "take me - I'm yours" then I can't really complain too loudly when I get reamed, can I?

This is not directly Apple's fault. Of course if they made a decent fucking product that didn't tell users what they could and couldn't do with it, there would be no problem. But that's not the way that Apple works.

And yet fucktards continue to buy their crap knowing full well that it should come with a 200 litre drum of KY Jelly to ease the pain, and then try to make it do something it's not supposed to do. It's like buying a 1980 Vauxhall Viva, putting a V8 in it and expecting it to go like a Ferrari.

Roll on open source phones.

I've got an idea...

Why doesn't someone create some add-ons to make Windows seem like a real operating system?

Wait - why would they?

Simple solution

Offer to let one monkey go for each PETA member who volunteers.

Cerf is now officially on my "Dicks" list

How have the mighty fallen. And yes, and Evil Google icon, please.

Been a while

since I've tried Mandriva. I'm happy with Ubuntu, but it's great to see releases like this improving the breed!

Bloody horrible

Stop following Mickey$shaft like a bloody sheep. They change their crap as a "lipstick on the pig" exercise and for no good reason.

Put the effort into researching what users find best and most functional and stick to that. Change for the sake of change is the last resort of the programatically incompetent.

For why?

"The cuts come as newcomers such as Google and a bleak global economy have taken some of the swagger out of Microsoft's stride over the past decade."

Ah - that's good then. I was afraid that it was a reflection of the fact that their products are steaming piles of dog turds. Redoubled marketing efforts will undoubtedly solve the problem.

OMG!

Linux behaving like Windwoes?

US-centric much?

"Shane Atkinson was fined $71,870 (NZ$100,000) while his partner-in-spam Roland Smits was ordered to hand over $35,915 (NZ$50,000)"

Shouldn't that be "Shane Atkinson was fined NZ$100,000 (US$71,870) while his partner-in-spam Roland Smits was ordered to hand over NZ$50,000 (US$35,915)"?

I call shenanigans

Linux < 1%? I think not.

See "1% Linux Market Share = 100% Dishonesty" - http://blog.linuxtoday.com/blog/2009/05/1-linux-market.html

In 2003 ZDNet reported "Market researcher IDC expects to announce within weeks that Linux PC market share in 2003 hit 3.2%, overtaking Apple Computer Inc.’s MacOS. And the researcher expects Linux to capture 6% of this market by 2007. That’s still tiny compared with Microsoft’s 94% share." (http://blogs.zdnet.com/ITFacts/?p=5334)

"If anything, the Linux desktop market share has continued to increase and is probably currently at 8-10% and rising. Dell and the other PC OEMs wouldn't have invested in selling Linux pre-installed if it appealed only to less than 1% of the desktop market."

Interesting technology

with quite a few worthwhile applications. But for book readers and the like, damned if I can see any advantage over my old iPaq running Mobireader. It's got colours, it's backlit (so I can read it in bed at night without waking the Mrs) and, should I want it to, it can do other stuff. Yes, it's running the abominable Windwoes CE, but since I only use it for one purpose, it seems far superior to an e-book reader.

I suppose the ability of e-ink to retain its state should mean virtually limitless battery life, but I think I'll wait until the backlighting problem's overcome, at least, before I think about it.

Evil Bill - because he's a dick.

Has PETA heard of this?

Maybe they could capture the PETA terrists and irradiate them.

Mind you, six-arsed monkeys would be cool.

WTF?

People actually use that web-based shite as their primary e-mail? Sometimes stupidity is its own punishment.

title

Microshaft - is there anything they can't fuck up?

@responders to ratsac11

Another paid Mickey$shaft shill. Don't feed the monkeys.