* Posts by lukewarmdog

493 posts • joined 3 Jul 2009

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Uber driver 'pulls handgun' on passenger

lukewarmdog
Windows

Re: Interesting

@kumar12 I don't know. Is it "all of them"? Or maybe "none of them"? Something in-between? Can you repeat the question?

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Holy sh*t week forces Twitter top brass to go on ‘retreat’

lukewarmdog
Megaphone

Ads

The problem isn't Twitter, you either use it or you don't. It's not offensive like Facebook and to my mind anyway does have real world valuable application.

Again imho, the problem is the ad supported model for anything. I've never bought due to an ad, I don't click them, I go out of my way to block them. You need something else not cleverer ways to show better (in some undefined way) ads. They should trial a sub model to see what happens because an money haemorrhaging ad supported model that doesn't shows ads to its most valuable customers clearly doesn't understand what valuable or customer means.

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1

El Reg picked a pack of ace pic-titlers

lukewarmdog
Happy

emily wondered

how long she had to leave her hands in the air like she just didn't care before the 90s would call and ask for their thing back.

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Hello Barbie controversy re-ignited with insecurity claims

lukewarmdog

why hack..

As a criminal mastermind I wouldn't waste my money hiring a decent hacker to provide a MITM attack. I'd just steal the doll and replace it with one of my own, already pre-configured to ask the child to let me charge up via daddys computer "Because I'm feeling a bit tired".

Wouldn't be surprised if this has already been done.

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IT bloke: Crooks stole my bikes after cycling app blabbed my address

lukewarmdog
Unhappy

Not his fault

I think what we're all missing here is this important line:

"The following morning my garage had been cleverly broken into and they were gone."

It wasn't stupidly broken into, it was cleverly broken into, he probably didn't stand a chance.

As far as insurance goes, when you have a phone stolen at a pub, the police will ask if you had it in sight at all times, did you put it down on a table, did you wave it round the pub. Same here, the insurers will start asking "did you advertise it in an app" and refuse to pay up.

I suspect that you cycle round on your £1k bike but that all the work is being done on your phone or watch. Surely a better solution would be to have the bike be connected, that way when it's stolen, like your phone, you can remotely track it and / or disable it. It would be hard to remotely kill your phone and also the thief as phones are rather small devices and it's probably not a good idea to fill them with nitro-glycerine but a bike frame would surely be a different matter. I'm just saying.

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Rdio's collapse another nail in the coffin of the 'digital economy'

lukewarmdog
Megaphone

Home Taping

I've been home taping Justin Bieber for months now and he's still bloody alive.

I want a refund.

20
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Linux kernel dev who asked Linus Torvalds to stop verbal abuse quits over verbal abuse

lukewarmdog
Mushroom

all moot

I wouldn't work somewhere where people were abusive to me about my work. Not even if they paid me. On my way out I'd drag HR and the lawyers in to it.

To assume someone should accept that in a voluntary position is just fooling yourself that they'll stay.

And to anyone saying she is being a bit thin-skinned, it really doesn't matter, the law matters and when it catches up, which it will, she'll be a thin skinned volunteer with the law on her side. She walked away, she isn't the one to worry about. The one to worry about is the person who is collecting a dossier of all those abusive emails with an eye on suing you and taking your business off you when the law does catch up.

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6

GCHQ's SMURF ARMY can hack smartphones, says Snowden. Again.

lukewarmdog
Devil

pre-hacked phones

So you've identified some people of interest, got access to their phones, added some monitoring software.. whilst you're there why not add a small syringe of anthrax that you can remotely activate through the earpiece when you hear keywords: poisonberry Smurf. Or a small surgical saw activated at pocket level: Chainsaw Smurf. Or a tiny packet of C4.. Clouseau Smurf.

*fictional militant smurfs

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0

Australian boffins say Quantum Pentiums are on the horizon

lukewarmdog
Windows

techniques

built "using techniques very similar to those used to manufacture whatever device you're using to read this story"

good grief, I certainly hope not, I'm reading this on an Apple device and if the NSW guys have been treating their construction bods the same way Foxconn do, 1/10th of them have certainly killed themselves by now..

Also I'd like to add that if you record all the electrons as being zero at the same time, your quantum computer might be switched off.

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1

As McAfee runs for US President – we ask a crucial question: Will Reg readers back him?

lukewarmdog

Go West

If I could vote, I'd vote Kanye.

I'd be happy if Mcafee wanted to take it to a sudden death elimination round however.

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Heigh ho, oh no! Politically correct panto dumps Snow White’s dwarfs

lukewarmdog
Joke

Won't someone think of the children

When your options are already highly paid professional actors or children who are probably in need of a bit of pocket money.. it's a small price to pay.

Plus it's theatre, who doesn't prefer longer intervals to short breaks.

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Anonymous UK 'leader' fined for revealing ID of rape complainant

lukewarmdog

wait..

I thought I was the leader of Anonymous..

How does he prove that? By putting on a mask? And people go "ooo you're the guy in the mask"

I'm so confused by all of this.

According to Wiki (which we all believe implicitly obviously)

"Because Anonymous has no leadership, no action can be attributed to the membership as a whole."

So if he IS the leader, why isn't he in court on behalf of all the illegal Anonymous and sub-groups actions?

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Almost all dot-science malicious, dot-cricket rigged, researchers find

lukewarmdog

.kim

sadly there is a "kanye.kim"

"mynameis.kim" has expired

there isn't an "everyonehates.kim".. missed opportunity

"northkorealoves.kim" would be excellent propaganda

the reason for making the .kim domain seems to be "there are a lot of people called kim so um.. that's a good enough reason"

With reasoning like that there should be way more ridiculous domains out there

none of which I'm going to suggest here as I want to keep .deadbaby to myself.

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Croc country cops' mobile facial matching a festival party pop

lukewarmdog

potential criminals?

"The law will identify potential criminals"

surely "the law" should be identifying actual criminals

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Boffins learn to send boredom-beating suggestions to smartphone-fondlers

lukewarmdog
Big Brother

if you are x, look at this y..

If they could detect when you were lost and late for a meeting (number of times mapping client checked, number of times calendar checked, number of times the time app has been checked) they could reccomend you blow off that date / interview and offer you cheap cinema tickets. Or hot singles near you. Or a CV site. Or all three.. why the hell not.

This research isn't exactly new however, I've seen it a lot in online games.

Player 1 asks another player "u mad, bro?" repeatedly

At the point that player 2 ragequits, that's when he scores a 5 on the u mad, bro? scale.

If only there was a serious application for this. Like.. number of times a user checks depression sites, looks up gun shops, gets directed to suicide help line and law enforcement honeypot sites.

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Canned laughter for Canadians selling cans of air at $15 a pop

lukewarmdog
Coffee/keyboard

hats off to them

As for the safety dance, I always felt it would be safer if they'd been men with hats.

Has nobody thought of the premium air market? Much like the premium water market where Perrier vies with Evian, graded air from specific parts of the world could be used to clean keyboards and computer equipment better than other types of air. "Collected by the abbots at one of Frances oldest sources of air" for instance.

1
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Prepare to be Thunderstruck: What if 'deuszu' ISN'T the Ashley Madison hacker?

lukewarmdog
Megaphone

Understanding

"starting from a point of understanding the primary cultures helps."

Starting from a point of understanding the first post would help me, I feel.

So far I have:

Anonymous is like cake. Some of it is eggs, some of it is flour.

You can't make cake without breaking eggs.

Sometimes cake is beetroot, sometimes carrot, but. always. cake.

Time for dinner I feel.

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1

HTC caught storing fingerprints AS WORLD-READABLE CLEARTEXT

lukewarmdog

bank on it

If it can be broken, somebody will.

Admittedly you shouldn't make it easy for them.. but remember the days when your phone was just a phone? Not really sure why it had to become the single place you keep all your data any more than why your car keys didn't become the same thing.

I don't use my fingerprint on my phone to activate recognition so I can log onto my bank, touchID does log me in (most of the time) to the phone but then I go online and enter a ton of details. If you stole my fingerprint I'm not really sure what good it would do you in my case.

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Perhaps middle-aged blokes SHOULDN'T try 34-hour-long road trips

lukewarmdog

won't someone think of the robots

Surely the boffin who makes the robots just needs to give them the relevant desires and they WILL want to get their nails done. If they don't have fingers, they will absolutely be jealous of the go faster stripes on their neighbors. Give them internet connectivity and they can compare robot tats with counterparts around the world, choose body mods from an online catalog and contact the people they put out of manual work to come paint those designs on them.

My auto-shop will happily give kickbacks to any boffin who implements this.

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It's incredibly easy to bump someone off online, and here's how to do it – infosec bod

lukewarmdog

Not just illegal scams..

There's a whole bunch of people in America who don't want to be found, don't care about lack of genuine passport details and don't need no credit cards to pick up extra guns for their government-hating compounds. If they were also dead, they'd be completely off the radar. That would be worrying, I'd imagine, for the people paid to keep an eye on them.

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Carphone Warehouse coughs to MONSTER data breach – 2.4 MEELLION Brits at risk

lukewarmdog

Sophisticated

Is there a graph somewhere I don't know about which shows how good an attack was versus how good the security on a site was?

Or a sliding scale maybe starting off with brute force on the left with 0 day attacks on the right?

I have no idea how they get actually measured. Is there not an el reg measuring tool? Like half an opm based purely on the numbers used and the probability of it being a nation state sponsored attack?

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Crackpot hackpots pop top of GasPots

lukewarmdog

Re: Is the prison-industrial complex posting here?

If jail time makes execs think twice before they take that job they can't do, before they appoint someone else who can't do a job, before they stifle the changes required in a company due to ignorance, stupidity, unwillingness to do something.. then bring on the jail time.

I point to the mess at OPM as a prime example.

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Moronic Time cover sets back virtual reality another 12 months

lukewarmdog

star wars kid..

Are we sure that isn't Ghyslain Raza?

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Want to download free AV software? Don't have a Muslim name

lukewarmdog

foreign sounding name?

Seen this said a couple of times.

It's just a name. Computers can't hear how you say it and they can't identify from your typing what colour you are. This is very much a human failing.

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Obsolescence of food is complete: Soylent now comes in bottles

lukewarmdog

Diet shake

So is the point of this not just because it's handy but also weight loss a la slimfast?

Two delicious shakes followed by actual food?

Guessing that's where they're aiming it at, rather than at the whey protein drinking bodybuilder crowd.

I can see it being useful in food shortage situations, especially the pre-watered variety for disaster hit areas.

I'm actually more confused having looked at their website than I was before I read it.

"Some people use it almost exclusively" - do they, really tho?

0
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Hacking Trump: Can we not label web vandalism as 'terrorism', please?

lukewarmdog

Can't they claim..

It was just free penetration testing.

Incidentally that is what Clinton should have claimed.

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Re/code apologizes for Holocaust 'joke' tweet

lukewarmdog

Stick with what you know

If your reputation is based on reviewing computers you should probably not post jokes. Similarly i would protest in short form if Frankie Boyle posted a serious review of Windows 10.

There are plenty of keyboard / social justice warriors out there that will force you to apologise for what you've typed that you need to make sure what you wrote came from the "I don't give a crap" account and not the "my site has serious investors trying to make money off this" account.

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Lottery chief resigns as winning combo numbers appear on screen BEFORE being drawn

lukewarmdog

graphics guy

Why is there a graphics guy and not a tiny camera taking pictures of the numbers or even better yet just reading data off the balls via nfc or magnets or whatever technology these people have. They must have more technology than relying on a guy to type in the numbers onto the TV..

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Watch leggy ROBOT INSECT WALK on WATER before JUMPING OFF

lukewarmdog

Potential Uses

"perhaps unsurprisingly given the resultant microrobot's potential uses"

I am not seeing any potential uses here.

Giving passing sailors a very small fright isn't going to win the war unless they can suddenly shoot them with a very small concealed gun... oh wait.. do they have very small concealed weapons?

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Verizon splits with carrier-led bonking and invests in SimplyTapp

lukewarmdog

unattended checkin

In Iceland the apartments we've stayed in for the last few years email you a login for the main door then your keys are just in a pigeon hole with your name / room number on it. Simpler times.

My worry is that once you've replaced all your (working perfectly well) cards with an app and you lose your phone, you lose not only all those cards at once but also your ability to phone anyone and report the loss..

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'Apple lures labels from free streams – and why is no one doing anything about it' shrieks group

lukewarmdog
Trollface

@Doug

You're stupider than the ebook thing.

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4 new twists that push the hacker attack on millions of US govt workers into WTF land

lukewarmdog

Self-improvement

Hacks in, changes salary, logs back out. Worked in Ferris Bueller..I'll just blame the other hackers if anyone notices.

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Joke no more: Comedy virty currency Dogecoin gets real in big Xmas heist

lukewarmdog

Doge

Pronounced dodgy?

And being managed on reddit? I'd rather bank with 4chan

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You gotta fight for your copyright ... Beastie Boys sue toymaker over TV ad

lukewarmdog

not just the beasties but..

http://www.billboard.com/biz/articles/news/digital-and-mobile/5820090/beastie-boys-vs-goldieblox-new-countersuit-as-universal

Seems they have already pulled the BB add, privated a bunch of other ads they were hoping to use on YouTube.

I'm a bit surprised that a- they're trying to use YouTube to sell a product.. but b- that YouTube allowed the music. The last time I thought "I know, I'll put a bit of that behind this hastily thrown together powerpoint" it told me that EMI wouldn't let me, mere seconds later. Yet Goldieblox get a dozen videos on there containing other peoples content?

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Want to know if that hottie has HIV? Put their blood in the DVD player

lukewarmdog
Joke

Cheap discs

Presumably they can just use old copies of Bon Jovi's Living on a Prayer

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Little spider makes big-spider-puppet CLONE of itself out of dirt

lukewarmdog

Re: ummm

If the spider is ALREADY scary, why would it need to build a second scary spider to erm scare stuff off?

So maybe it is lonely and has made itself a friend, partner, parent figure

or the scary spider scares prey away from the model into the real spiders path

or maybe it's a form of self or species worship made in its own image

Or maybe its doing gangnam style. until we see it set to music we can't really say.

We make snowmen, maybe spiders make dirt spiders.

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His Holiness Benedict XVI to tweet to his Catholic flock

lukewarmdog
Childcatcher

Go home

Well the penalty for getting it wrong was having your balls cut off.

Actually that would make the Catholic Church a much safer place for our children, we should test them all on their Latin.

0
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John McAfee rushed to hospital over heart attack fears

lukewarmdog
Windows

Certainly

Mcafee : man my neighbour is annoying, wish he was dead

Passing Columbian drug seller : anything for our best customer

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'Build us a Death Star, President Obama' demand thousands

lukewarmdog
Gimp

lukewarmdog

Well I signed. Sure I'm a non-American but there will be jobs for all. You can't rule space without a supply of Storm Troopers and I really, really, really want to wipe out Jar Jar Banks planet.

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Apple-HTC patent deal doesn't include designs, 'cloned' iDevices

lukewarmdog
Childcatcher

If only

A judge would just tell them all to grow up, deny the opportunity to appeal and let the consumer decide which phone they actually want.

Love / hate of a brand is more powerful than design, patents, apps.

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Explosion of DANGEROUS IT GEAR injures and CRIPPLES MEDICS

lukewarmdog
Coffee/keyboard

Tennis Elbow

"Doctors also complained of suffering from tennis elbow after carrying around a tablet computer."

Erm tennis elbow according to my quick glance at wiki is caused by elbow movement. Carrying something around would not cause this.

I'd also maybe point out that some kind of bag or satchel to put the (obviously extremely heavy) tablet in might help the (obviously extremely weak) doctors alleviate this condition.

Did Alan Hedge hurt himself in any way during the creation of this report?

New ergonomic keyboard icon. Obviously.

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Apple share dive scuppers trader's alleged get-rich-quick fraud scam

lukewarmdog
Childcatcher

Double Standards

Totally agree. I have an intense dislike for shorting and given the nature of the gamble I feel that anyone involved should be locked up irrespective of the outcome.

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Internet shut-down easier, in more countries, than you think

lukewarmdog

Blowing stuff up

Personally I'd leave all the hardware in place, who knows when your dictatorship might actually win its battle and need the Internet to announce this. A few well placed people pulling plugs at APNIC et al would conceal what was going on quite easily.

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China plans astro-farms on Mars

lukewarmdog
Childcatcher

Population Expansion

Wonder if they'll move from the one child policy to an enforced ten child policy to allow them to colonise everywhere first.

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McFlurry McMisdemeanour costs Welsh lass McJob

lukewarmdog
FAIL

Mounsey

“You may feel that it is trivial, but with 740 employees in my business then if my management team were just to overlook such incidents then quickly it would become a free for all."

So, all of the employees are criminals and the only way to keep them in check is to scapegoat the odd one, now and then? Classism, racism, stereotyping, work place bullying.. won't somebody think about the children?

1
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Event Horizon Telescope spots source of black hole jets

lukewarmdog
Coat

black hole engineer

I believe someone from British Gas phoned ahead to fix it but they wont hear back about whether anyone is in for quite some time..

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Tibetan STATUE found by 1930s NAZI expedition is of ALIEN ORIGIN

lukewarmdog
Coat

When in roam

Was he using Apple Maps to locate Aryanism?

Also I see no proof it was carved from a meteorite and didn't just arrive on our planet this way, looks to me like it was just about to get its coat.

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Oz gov cyber-safety unit loses punters' info IN THE POST

lukewarmdog
Childcatcher

still not big

Look it's not like the Government buildings are situated on opposite galactic arms or that there's some incredibly dense, incredibly hot thing between the guy who has the data and the guy who wants the data. We're not talking about dog and pony operations here. Someone somewhere made the decision to mail - and promptly lose - all that data when they could have cosied up over drinks and nibbles somewhere posh and handed it over.

I had a quick look where both contractors are based. I accept that Australia is large but the contractors are actually relatively close together geographically which makes the actual size of Australia a moot point. Google Maps suggests 1700 - 1800 km between Melbourne (Ladoo) and Brisbane (AUSCert). That isn't so impossibly huge to imagine.20 hours if you like driving or 2 if you get a plane, $90 for an economy ticket.

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Lowery: The blue-collar musician at the eye of the copyright storm

lukewarmdog
Stop

who?

I once worked in the industry therefore I am immensely qualified to comment on it.

.. not really.. No idea who Lowery is but he has such a vested interest in music making him money that the whole article is pointless. Is he secretly Fergal Sharkey?

There are lots of issues with bands making money, maybe if you're not doing as well as you wanted you should figure out if that's because you're a bit shit and maybe sell your soul to the Kylie-sampled discobeat that will make you oodles of cash.

And for the record I've seen many bands that toured to make money. Senseless Things, Mega City 4, PWEI, Stuffies. The trick is not to have hundreds of techies sucking out all the profits from any given show. And have your own van. Turn up, play, get paid. With the corporate branding of venues of course this may change, in which case the megacorps are the nemesis of "real bands", not downloaders.

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Amazon buys 4-person 3D mapping startup, claims report

lukewarmdog
Stop

Shopping

Unless it's a UFO-sized and shaped mall, you should not be tracked whilst perusing items as diverse as flowers for the wife, flowers for the secret girlfriend, childrens clothes for your kids, adult diapers for when you work away. And you really don't want your phone to tell your wife that your mistresseses inflatable dungeon in a box kit is available from the adult shop just down the hall.

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