* Posts by Swarthy

2412 publicly visible posts • joined 24 Jun 2009

Blue Monday: Efforts to inspire teamwork with swears back-fires for n00b team manager

Swarthy

Re: Managers looking good!

I grew up calling that a "Rectal-Cranial Inversion" or RCI. RCIs frequently lead to "Non-linear waterfowl issues."

Techie in need of a doorstop picks up 'chunk of metal' – only to find out it's rather pricey

Swarthy
Coat

Re: Watch out for geological samples

That wasn't gneiss!

Swarthy

"Thorin sits down and sings about gold"

Swarthy
WTF?

Fiberglass is industrial candyfloss?

Artificial Intelligence: You know it isn't real, yeah?

Swarthy

Re: It's Just Pattern Recognition

My theory is that intelligence is pattern recognition. Well, pattern recognition and predictions, several layers deep.

We see a pattern and make a prediction based off of it, we then review the predictions for patterns, and predict our predictions, and note the patterns, and then we alter our future predictions to give a better pattern.

And then we see Jesus in a grilled cheese.

Should the super-rich pay 70% tax rate above $10m? Here's Michael Dell's hot take for Davos

Swarthy
Boffin

Re: Rich Tax Paradox

What I was proposing is almost, but not quite, entirely unlike what we currently have.

I specified turnover rather than profit so that those complicated structures to obfuscate profits would no longer apply; and I specified median (sort the numbers, and grab the one in the middle), as opposed to mean (add all and divide by the count), so that to shaft the low-end employees, they would need to add more high-paying jobs, not just give the fat cats a raise. I was tempted to suggest that it should be evaluated on the mode (most frequently occurring number), but that could be a later change, once they have figured out how to game the median system.

Swarthy
WTF?

Re: My wife and I set up a foundation about 20 years ago, and we would have contributed

He said he would have donated.... He never said that he did donate that much.

Swarthy

"between £50,000 and £100,000 of debt" for a doctor?!

Damn, that's about what getting a Bachelor's will leave you with in the US.

Swarthy
Alert

Re: Rich Tax Paradox

The 70% tax on the rich is fine with me. And up the corporate tax rate as well.
Better yet, set the corporate tax rate as a function of turnover vs. median (not mean) employee salary. The lower the median salary compared to turnover, the higher the tax rate. If you want to lower your tax bill, pay your employees better.

If you want to shaft your employees, then prepare to get shafted by the Gov't.

Florida man's deadliest catch forces police to evacuate Taco Bell

Swarthy
Mushroom

Re: Here fishy fishy

Ah, the famed 30-second slum clearance.

I could think of a few candidates closer to the DoD that could use it. Baltimore, for example.

Swarthy
Paris Hilton

Re: Candidate failed

Why do I get the feeling that I should not google "Full Cleveland" whilst at work

I can hear the light! Boffins beam audio into ears with freakin' lasers

Swarthy

Re: Dancefloors?

I think decent baffles and audio engineering might be cheaper. Some decent electrostatic speakers would have a similar effect, but they might not be cheaper.

Swarthy
Happy

For the folks that cannot wear headphones or earbuds; they may be interested in transducer (bone conductivity) headphones. They don't sit in/on the ears, but rather just in-front/behind them, so may not invoke the same sensory reaction.

'Nun' drops goat head on pavement outside Cheltenham 'Spoons

Swarthy
Coat

Re: Pigs heads...

Intestines? That's utter tripe, and sounds offal!

...Unless it's filled with ground meat and spices, then it is far from the wurst you could do. Only a brat would disagree.

You heard the latest Chinese CRISPRs? They are real: Renegade bio-boffin did genetically modify baby twins

Swarthy

Re: He has a tough name to work with...

What's on Second.

Big Red's big pay gap: $13,000 gulf between male and female Oracle staffers – reports

Swarthy
Stop

Re: If you're white and male you'll never get it

@AC - I get what the point you are trying to make, but you are being overly pedantic (and this coming from a semi-rabid pedant), and abusing reductio ad absurdum to the point where you have created a strawman.

Yes, one definition of "discrimination" is "(a) Recognition and understanding of the difference between one thing and another." But that is a separate definition from "(b) unjust or prejudicial treatment of different categories". Arguing that a==b is what lands you in strawman category.

I'm tempted to compare your argument with equating 'wind' as in "wind the string around the spool" with 'wind' as in moving air; but then I would be guilty of the self-same false equivalency.

Man drives 6,000 miles to prove Uncle Sam's cellphone coverage maps are wrong – and, boy, did he manage it

Swarthy

Re: PSA

A bit of a Theresa/Teresa May situation?

I may check on this at home, or not.

US comms watchdog's industry-friendly 5G rules challenged by fresh legislation

Swarthy
WTF?

$270/year?!

And the locality would have to maintain it? Jeez Pai, why not just go all out and call it $1/year, and the local gov't would have to send the receipt with a note saying "Thank you Sir, may I have another."

I'm not sure how densely 5G masts can/should be packed, but a municipality would need about 400 cell sites to pay for one tech to maintain 'em (and the tech's boss); and that's only if the maintenance is exclusively remote admin (no hardware or travel costs). In places like NYC or San Francisco, they would need a lot more sites if they want the tech to live within an hour of the city.

FSM help us if their were a city-wide weather event (lightning/ice storm or hurricane), the city would be rolling out 6G before the poor schleb finished replacing the damaged 5G masts.

Huawei’s elusive Mr Ren: We’re just a 'sesame seed' in a superpower spat

Swarthy
WTF?

Re: Luddites = Non Sequitur

Speaking of non sequitur, you have you points E and F right next to each other. How can China be plotting a Technological Empire, without inventing or innovating?

I also feel the need to point out that Huawei is slightly ahead of other telecoms equipment providers as far as 5G stuff goes.

Dozens of .gov HTTPS certs expire, webpages offline, FBI on ice, IT security slows... Yup, it's day 20 of Trump's govt shutdown

Swarthy

Re: Comparison

Add to that that they have to authorize back-pay, and the bill to do that got shot down by the Republicans in the Senate.

Also, what good is back-pay if you've been evicted?

Hubble 'scope camera breaks down amid US govt shutdown, forcing boffins to fix it for free

Swarthy
Happy

Re: Neutrality

Considering the Democrats did not take control of the House until January 2019, and the Shutdown started on 11 days prior, it would be wholly inappropriate to blame the shut-down on the Dems. Additionally, Trump has said - on National TV - that this is his shutdown.

So it must be Obama's fault.

Steamer closets, flying cars, robot boxers, smart-mock-cock ban hypocrisy – yes, it's the worst of CES this year

Swarthy
Paris Hilton

Re: Look out below!

If it falls on them, does that make them passers-on?

You were told to clean up our systems, not delete 8,000 crucial files

Swarthy

Re: scratch

"Always mount a scratch monkey."

Oregon can't stop people from calling themselves engineers, judge rules in Traffic-Light-Math-Gate

Swarthy

Re: @swarthy

I took no offense at the "tea boy" comment, I simply didn't repeat it in reply. I even accept your use of "tea boy" to indicate mediocre code, they are still way ahead of HR Managers and Accountants who try to write their own "software".

You did not say "that great code is indistinguishable from mediocre code, until a situation where the mediocre code fails and the great code continues to work"; you said that there is no difference. I am pedantic, and whilst the former may have been what you meant, it is not what you said.

I count knowing what hardware you will be using (usually a given or derived requirement) and it's associated capabilities as a "known tolerance". EG: If you are writing embedded software, it will not tolerate using PHP.

Saying that software is not engineered is a bit like saying "we build bridges, we design bridges, but we sure as fuck don't engineer them." Now, one can slap a couple of planks across a stream and have a non-designed, non-engineered bridge, and one can copy pasta from Stack Overflow and create the equivalent software. Or one could research how much weight said bridge will have to carry, how long/wide the bridge must be, is it foot or vehicular traffic, etc and engineer a bridge with the requisite strength, give, and support.

I am not saying that all software is engineered, but you are saying that none of it is, and you are wrong.

Swarthy
WTF?

Re: Great for this Engineer

Really!?

Use your handle to replace "known tolerances" with "Given and derived requirements" and "known materials and techniques" with "appropriate languages and algorithms", and see that you're spouting bollocks. Per your argument about scale, I have seen instances where that scale was 1 user; you may as well be saying that if no-one finds a bug/vulnerability, than said bug/vuln doesn't exist.

More nodding dogs green-light terrible UK.gov pr0n age verification plans

Swarthy
Headmaster

Re: Easter you say?

The intent of that comment, as I read it, is that "This authoritarian nonsense will not be pushed by Brussels; our government will be completely free to push their own authoritarian nonsense, that they currently blame on Brussels."

Florida man stumbles on biggest prime number after working plucky i5 CPU for 12 days straight

Swarthy
Trollface

Re: Mersenne

Nah, that's still covered by the original Godwin.

Um, I'm not that Gary, American man tells Ryanair after being sent other Gary's flight itinerary

Swarthy
Alert

Re: Not everyone likes a +

... rejects the <email>+<website>@.... since that is a wonderful way to track who sold the address list.
And I think you just nailed down why so many reject the '+' in an e-mail address.

Bored IT manager automates Millennium Eve checks to ditch snoozing for boozing

Swarthy
Thumb Up

Ah, Asocial Media. I like it!

Heard the one where the boss calls in an Oracle consultant who couldn't fix the database?

Swarthy
Facepalm

Re: RE: Getting one over on the boss

The worst ones are where you are writing software to streamline some of the old processes, and show the initial design to be told "No, do it <stupid way> so it's more like our current procedure."

It's a requirement, so you do it their way, and when the application gets to User Acceptance Testing, ALL of the users make a comment like "Why did you do it that way, we don't do it that way. It would be better if it did it <originally designed way>."

Dutch boyband hopes to reverse Brexit through the power of music

Swarthy
Thumb Up

Re: Slightly wrong.

I had to upvote, not because of your position (As a Septic, I have no right to care), but rather just for "omnishambollox".

Could you speak up a bit? I didn't catch your password

Swarthy

Re: Solution...

A petard is a small breaching charge-named after the French word for flatulence.

One could be hoist by their own petard by getting blown up by their own bomb (see "Scoring an Own-Goal") or by having such an intense discharge of gases that they are raised on a malodorous cloud of their own making.

2018 ain't done yet... Amazon sent Alexa recordings of man and girlfriend to stranger

Swarthy
Gimp

Re: Reach out?

How else are you supposed to "touch faith" with out reaching out?

Where's that Depeche Mode Icon.... Close enough.

Roll a diplomacy check to win the election: Vote tie resolved by a D20

Swarthy
Trollface

Re: Check the die

That's okay, provided you can remember where the spots used to be.

Oh Deer! Poacher sentenced to 12 months of regular Bambi screenings in the cooler

Swarthy

Re: ...but may also run afoul of US laws forbidding cruel and unusual punishment

The trick here is that the Constitution prohibits "Cruel and Unusual Punishment". if It's done on a normal day-to-day basis (EG: several years waiting for execution, or loading up the charges so that a minor crime ends up with decades of prison time) then while it may be cruel, it is not also unusual.

This punishment, while unusual, is not particularly cruel; and should pass the sniff test.

Oracle? On my server? I must have been hacked! *Penny drops* Oh sh-

Swarthy

Re: re The bad old days

JANET?! Dammit!

Got any ecsta-sea? Boffins get octopuses high on MDMA – for science, duh

Swarthy

Re: A rally of octopus

A wunch of Bankers?

A flash of inspiration sees techie get dirty to fix hospital's woes

Swarthy

Re: Slightly similar situation.

Logitech Darkfield Mice would solve that problem. Mine will even work on clean (un-scratched/un-textured) glass.

Boss regrets pointing finger at chilled out techie who finished upgrade early

Swarthy
Mushroom

Re: The boss owned up? Apologised, even?

A military leader doesn't want to find out that his / her people don't trust them at the time the bullets start flying all around the place..not because the troops may advance to the rear with haste, but because some of the bullets heading toward said office may originate from "friendly" weapons.

Not to mention that live grenades, minus their pins, make for lousy bedfellows.

Military troops can/will take a lot of grief, but if it gets to be too much, they tend to lodge their complaints ballistically.

Sur-Pies! Google shocks world with sudden Android 9 Pixel push

Swarthy
Boffin

Re: Its all in the name

Maybe it's Android v.9.86.96

Swarthy

The REAL challenge

Will be coming up with a proper dessert-themed "Q" word.

Nah, it won't install: The return of the ad-blocker-blocker

Swarthy

Re: How about ...

Return of the pop-under? I'll stick to Privacy Badger, thanks.

Here's why AI can't make a catchier tune than the worst pop song in the charts right now

Swarthy
Paris Hilton

Re: I'm actually surprised that it works on raw samples at all

I would be tempted to try some sort of 2D (or 3D for the extra challenge) visual representation of known music (perhaps frequencies defining hue, amplitude defining saturation, and time being converted to physical space) to train one of the visual/image "AI" machines and see if converting their generated output would do better than the audio AI.

UK spies broke law for 15 years, but what can you do? shrugs judge

Swarthy
Trollface

Re: GCHQ, MI5 and MI6 can fix the problem overnight ...

Just buy subpoena Facebook, then it's all legal.
If they bought Facebook, it would then be illegal for FB to collect all that they do.

So, yeah, they spooks should buy FB.

Boffins mix AI and chemicals to create super-fast lab assistant

Swarthy
Terminator

Re: Things I wont Work With

I also thought of that guy, and Ignition!, on reading this article. Except I thought "Hey, maybe this contraption could characterize some of the less pleasant fluorine reactions.

Adtech-for-sex biz tells blockchain consent app firm, 'hold my beer'

Swarthy
Coat

Re: Cheers for clarifying

More about the one-eyed bandit?

Tech team trapped in data centre as hypoxic gas flooded in. Again

Swarthy

Re: New version of Cluedo

Tim Curry as the BOFH, Madeline Kahn as Gina.

Or a reasonable facsimile thereof, it has been over 30 years.

FCC caught red-handed – again – over its $225 complaint billing plan

Swarthy

Re: Swamp

<quote>....was smoking something awfully strong.</quote>

Right, wrong hallucinogen, more likely LSD!!!

Considering the location of his support base, I'd suspect Meth.

Drug cops stopped techie's upgrade to question him for hours. About everything

Swarthy

Re: Pretty sure some other bloke is having a bad day...

The way I've seen Mass/Random Wizz Quizzing work is that they select a number of people to participate, and then select a number of samples at random to test. They may test each of them for a random substance, because there is no test for "everything". So OP may have been one of the non-tested samples, and wyatt's "guy" was randomly selected for the substance he got busted for.

UK Foreign Office offers Assange a doctor if he leaves Ecuador embassy

Swarthy
Headmaster

Health is every bit a public concern as education.
'Sokay, tho. The US is ruining its education systems as well. (preventing any improvements, actively shutting down any investigations into fraud, and doing SFA in regards to school safety)