* Posts by Swarthy

1341 posts • joined 24 Jun 2009

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Elon Musk: I'm gonna turn Mars into a $10bn death-dealing interplanetary gas station

Swarthy
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Re: Musk seems to be losing it

@ Mark 85

And if you perish on the planet, your corpse could be used to enrich the soil to pave the way for a better ecosystem. Not a horrible fate, and one that I also would not object to.

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The server's down. At 3AM. On Christmas. You're drunk. So you put a disk in the freezer

Swarthy
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Only sometimes?

Yep. Othertimes, even narrowly missing destruction won't make 'em part with the money: "We were safe, without spending all of that"; and then when the destruction is not averted: "You let us down, you ruined us, why would we give you more money?!"

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Moron is late for flight, calls in bomb threat

Swarthy
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Re: heroin and methamphetamine

Why not just Ride the Dragon?

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Naked, drunken Swede assaults chicken shed after 60th birthday

Swarthy
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Coat

That was just fowl.

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Florida Man's prized jeep cremated by exploding Samsung Galaxy Note 7

Swarthy
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Re: "the fire retardants in the modern car ABS do not fire retard"

Go easy on him... he's Florida Man.

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Call to kill FBI spying powers

Swarthy
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US Expectations

Well, they can expect that the other country will back off, but they may well be disappointed (and should be).

As my father taught me: "You can expect in one hand, and expectorate in the other - see which one fills up first."

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Swarthy
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Black Helicopters

There are a bunch of idiots in the Senate who are swallowing something from the FBI - not sure if it's their arguments, stuffed brown envelopes, or some all together less wholesome....

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Come in HTTP, your time is up: Google Chrome to shame leaky non-HTTPS sites from January

Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

Re: American ISPs

US ISPs specifically? Has someone forgotten Phorm?

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Swarthy
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Alert

Re: Really?

Lemme see...

The reason given by El Reg for not having HTTPS is that their ad broker won't do HTTPS, and they refuse to half-ass security: full ass, or no ass.

If they get a black eye from a lack of HTTPS, then they will be more inclined to transition to a broker who will do HTTPS to remove the warning.

Google Ads provides ads over HTTPS.

Profit?

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Inside our three-month effort to attend Apple's iPhone 7 launch party

Swarthy
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Facepalm

Re: Yeah, has some entertainment value

If Mr.. Allen had said "You are not welcome", or had invitations been issued (except not to El Reg), then this article would have been a non-thing. This was not actually documenting an attempt to get into the Apple Press Event, but rather it was documenting an attempt to get Apple to admit they didn't want El Reg, and possibly provide a reason.

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Punters want heart-throbs, not brains, when thinking wrist-jobs

Swarthy
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Re: But...

Similarly picky about watch bands (for different reasons) here. A leather band on my wrist will last about six months before it basically rots off. Stainless steel is good for 18-24 (depending on the steel) before it has corroded, pitted and crumbled into uselessness.

I am also hard on crystals, so I don't imagine I'll be doing a smart watch anytime soon - Unless they come out with one with a replaceable crystal and a titanium band.

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Voyager 2's closest Saturn swoop was 35 years ago today

Swarthy
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Re: Shorely we wouldn't coast all the way?

Third question: How big would those fuel tanks have to be?

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Unlimited mobile data in America – where's the catch? There's always a catch

Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

Re: How much?

Actually, for US prices, that's cheap! We septics are getting screwed worse than her -->

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Boffins design security chip to spot hidden hardware trojans in processors

Swarthy
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Re: But..

It's turtles, all the way down.

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EU ministers look to tighten up privacy – JUST KIDDING – surveillance laws

Swarthy
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"Report your family and friends - Win Fabulous Prizes!"

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Microsoft's maps lost Melbourne because it used bad Wikipedia data

Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

Re: Swindon

but as a former Swindon resident (Swindonista? Swindonite? ahwhocares)

Swindled?

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Ireland's govt IT: Recession and job cuts forced us to adapt

Swarthy
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Re: Hmmm...

Thanks. Do you know anything about the lay of the land in Shannon/Limerick?

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Swarthy
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Go

Hmmm...

So if one were an IT worker looking to start over in a new country, would Ireland be a good place to start looking?

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NASA tried turning lost spacecraft STEREO-B off and on again... but it didn't work. True story

Swarthy
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Re: Real programmers

https://xkcd.com/378/

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'NSA' hack okshun woz writ by Inglish speeker trieing to hyde

Swarthy
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Re: Sir

From what I've picked up from British media (including Attack the Block and Ali G) I would guess that the native loose grasp of grammar is more than doubled for US English.

However, from how it read in the article, the errors were not consistent with the errors of a non-native speaker. Most non-native errors arise from transliteration of thought (IE if you speak Russian as a native, and you think in Russian; your English sentences will follow Russian structure and, perhaps, Russian idiom). The errors that were analyzed did not conform to one particular set, and also used US idiomatic speech, but with errors introduced to seem like a foreign operation.

Theory: the verbiage was generated by a US speaker who tried to use "Russian" dialog from US movies to misdirect attention. To a USAian this means it is Russian, but to one who studies language it is very much not.

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Your wget is broken and should DIE, dev tells Microsoft

Swarthy
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Given the second part of your handle

You should understand that MS gives all of there users a choice - Hobson's choice

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Gaze in awe at Elon Musk’s historic 156-foot erection

Swarthy
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Facepalm

Re: Great to have one on display, but...

Later this year - according to the article.

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Microsoft promises free terrible coffee every month you use Edge

Swarthy
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Devil

Well, Starbucks' "coffee" is about 60% kool-aid....

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Swarthy
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Re: Where's the coffee?

It's a warm, brownish drink of indeterminate but probably sweet taste, preferable with other added flavourings that is almost, but not quite completely unlike coffee.

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Swarthy
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Re: Where's the coffee?

1) Depends on the Gas station

2) Starbucks is Gas Station "coffee" - With the sugar, milk and flavorings that GS Coffee needs to be drinkable(-ish) already added.

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Irish Olympics' officials digital devices seized in Rio

Swarthy
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Pint

Well done, Olympics Officials

Keeping the standards and ethics that have been made infamous over the years.

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My headset is reading my mind and talking behind my back

Swarthy
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The blue light effect doesn't seem to affect me

I sit in a cubicle with 5+ LED screens and still fall asleep about an hour after lunch.

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Password strength meters promote piss-poor paswords

Swarthy
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Joke

Re: saggfwuepp53hlq%4k12h

Dammit! Now I have to change my El Reg password!

- Wait - How did you get my password?!

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US Patent Office sued after it declared a power outage a 'national holiday'

Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

Lemme see if I read this right

The patent troll filed a suit against three chip makers, the chip makers filed a Patent Review Request (on the last available day, sure). If the power had not gone out, the IPR would have been received in time. With the power out, it would not have been. So the PTO extends deadlines for filings to make up for the outage.

If they did not grant the extension, would the chip makers be suing the PTO for stuffing up their end of the patent suit via power outage?

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Physicists believe they may have found fifth force of nature

Swarthy
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Devil

Re: This is why I love science

In this analogy, mysticism and spirituality is the 'devil'

That is what Lostyearsago said - ignorance is the devil.

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Microsoft has open-sourced PowerShell for Linux, Macs. Repeat, Microsoft has open-sourced PowerShell

Swarthy
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Go

Re: Might be better to...

Errm, They've already done that.

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Viscous liquid oozing down the walls? You must have hives

Swarthy
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Devil

Re: IT angle

Nope, BeeSD.

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Ancient radioactive tree rings could rip up the history books

Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

Re: Unless you are a Christian who cares...

Wait, isn't the whole point of a merkin that it is fake?

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Microsoft to overhaul Windows 10 UI – with a 3D Holographic Shell

Swarthy
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"Mixed reality"

Sounds about right for what MS has been living in.

Mix: 2 parts fantasy, 1 part reality, 3 parts bloody-mindedness, and 4 parts delusion. Shake Well.

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More gums than Jaws: Greenland super-sharks live past 400 years old

Swarthy
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Re: New dating techniques

PlentyOfFish?

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Boffins' blur-busting face recognition can ID you with one bad photo

Swarthy
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Re: One nation under one CCTV

"A boot stamping on a human face forever"

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Microbes that laugh at antibiotics: UK sinks £4.5m into China-Brit kill team

Swarthy
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Where do you think the marketeers come from?

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Swarthy
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Paris Hilton

I wonder...

I'm wondering if the research is into new antibiotics that aren't being resisted yet (kicking the can down the road), or if they are looking at new methodologies for attacking bacteria.

Or are they just going to dust off some Russian research on bacteriophages?

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Nobody expects... a surprise haemorrhoid operation

Swarthy
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FAIL

I believe I speak for all the downvoters

BOOTNOTES

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Toshiba flashes 100TB QLC flash drive, may go on sale within months. Really

Swarthy
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Re: "Quad Level Cell (QLC)"

Given the way that viability/re-usability seems to fall in proportion to the rise in levels, Hex-level Cell will be accurate for six level.

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Swarthy
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Re: "Quad Level Cell (QLC)"

Single-, Multi-, Three-, and now Quad-level Cell. I seriously doubt they will name the next one Quint. From the preceding chain, I can discern no consistent naming convention, so I would guess the name will be something "logical" like Quad Plus One Level Cell (Q+1LC). Or they may do a repeat and have "Five Level Cell (FLC)" and do the +1 bit on the six-banger, as otherwise it will have a collision with Single Level Cell.

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Hilton hotels' email so much like phishing it fooled its own techies

Swarthy
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Pirate

Re: "tricked its own IT shop into advising that it was a scam"

Obligatory Bill Hicks marketing quote.

We all know it.

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Hitler ‘ransomware’ offers to sell you back access to your files – but just deletes them

Swarthy
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Flame

Re: Honour System Malware

Damn you! - Wait, is this a Linux, Mac, or Windows Malware? I need to know which format command to type in.

The state of my HDD in about three hours.-->

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#Censusfail Australia: Not an attack, data safe, no heads to roll

Swarthy
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The router worked perfectly to deny the (possible?) DDOS - If there is no service, it cannot be denied.

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Thermostat ransomware

Swarthy
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Facepalm

"The Internet of Things sucks so, so much."

True, true.

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Your 'intimate personal massager' – cough – is spying on you

Swarthy
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Holmes

Re: @ Suricou Raven - Teledildonics ...

Because that word has been used several times in El Reg, in both articles and comments.

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Swarthy
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WTF?

It also bears remembering that the US bans Kinder Eggs on safety grounds, yet seems to belive that guns & ammo are safe.

Or they believe that people are mature and responsible enough to handle fire arms, but not enough to not choke on a well-advertised toy inside of chocolate.

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'Nigerian scammer' busted after he infected himself with malware

Swarthy
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Re: why are they not being treated as accessories?

Full analysis takes time, and you also need many "runs" so that you can trace the paths.

If they had blown the whistle PDQ, they could have gotten a fraction of the people running the scam, by letting it run for 2-3 months (and presumably logging the transactions, frauds, and scams) they nabbed the whole "company" and have records that could cause the victims to claim restitution.

Also, if watching, investigating, and gather evidence counted as accessory, then every LEO ever would also be guilty.

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Very peed off: Ohio urologists stay zipped after embarrassing leak

Swarthy
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Re: Seriously?

And also to extract the urine from the commetariat.

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Swarthy
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Unhappy

I try to keep my info secure

Companies I have to do business with (if you have kidney stones, you will be visiting a urologist) require and keep my info, and then fail on security.

I try to keep my info secure, but it feels like I'm pissing in the wind.

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