Don't worry. They couldn't hit an elephant from her...................
25 posts • joined 24 Jun 2009
You don't need a multi billion pound machine to send messages to the future
Simply write it down on a piece of paper and store it in a safe place.
You're right, Apple does enjoy a huge amount of success due to ignorant consumers. These are people who know very little about what makes high end tech tick and don't want to know. They need gear that is simple to use, understand and 'just works'.
That's why they buy Apple and shun anything that appeals to the command line interface mob.
A sad loss but .......
.... great looking beaver!
Jesus H Christ....
Just listen to all of you whinging pussies. First off, companies file patents for things that'll never see the light of day all of the time and since you have no guarantee that Apple will ever produce a kill switch, what the hell are you getting your panties in a bunch about?
Secondly, Jobs has said that one of the main reasons Apple wants to keep control over it's phone system is to stop unauthorized software threatening the mobile network. If Apple really were the control freaks that you say they are, then why is it that they don't even ask for registration and get you to jump through all sorts of hoops when you install their operating system on their computers? You know, like Microsoft does when you chuck it's OS on your PCs.
And you Android users make me laugh. You do know that Google own up to having a kill switch when you look at their terms and conditions don't you? And you do remember that they've already used it on two occasions to remotely wipe apps off users phones (with no guarantee of a refund) don't you - something which Apple has never done.
Oh, and you do remember that your 'garden without walls' has already seen one app uploading personal info to it's author in the background whilst you were using your phone? Of course, these sort of unscrupulous malware authors would never behave worse than Apple with people's data would they?
Grow up you silly sods and if you don't like Job's toy then don't buy one.
You're not singing anymore........
You're not siiiiiinging anymore!
"A lesbian on-line magazine."?
Dammit — never! I've always thought of the Reg as a small, humpback dwarf with a club foot, tech scandal sheet.
...we take off and nuke the whole site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Honestly, what is it with people's obsession about taking down Jobs and acting like Apple killed your dog? He's a tyrant, sure, but he's also revolutionized two and soon to be three industries. And the market has reflected that. He's got what people want, and they want to buy it. You feel differently. Apple isn't insulting you. (Google isn't liberating you, either — just try using non-Google products on your Incredible.) But this is how the market works. People have a choice—you made yours, great. Now shut up about it.
Because nobody wants to walk around with a stinky helmet.
Women deserve respect
Anything that can bleed for five days every month and not die has to be tough.
Puts the application switcher drop down menu back on the right hand side of the Finder's menu bar (along with a few other goodies). Invaluable if, like me, you're old school.
I've already got one of these...
... it's called 'The wife'.
I've seen these things before..
... in 'The Prisoner'. They can be very aggressive and nasty.
...just a long haired Adolf Hitler.
Lots of gear but....
"water, fuel, clothing, bedding, toiletries, educational and entertainment materials, exercise equipment, medicine, medical equipment, security devices, survival gear, tools, spare parts, radios, computers, televisions, safes, refrigerated vaults, off-road vehicles, seeds, farming tools, hunting, fishing equipment"
No tin opener. Why do they always make that mistake?
Something else to consider though
Weren't RIM at one time offering a buy one, get one free scheme with their Blackberries in the USA? That could make a difference to market share but it doesn't mean their products are streaking away from the iPhone in terms of popularity. After all, anyone can give their products away (except Palm apparently).
In the event of an accident..
...I'd say the safest thing to do would be to reverse the polarity of the neutron flow.
Mine's the one with the floppy hat and extra long scarf.
Can't see the point of an article like this
Seems to just illustrate how jealous of Apple the Register is. Obviously you're still smarting from them blanking you.
Thing is, if you're going to have a pop by running this type of copy, then it has to be biting and funny to have effect. This isn't. It's just boring.
Sorry guys but it's time to try a new tack.
It's the software, stupid.
None of you iPad knockers are taking into account the one thing the iPad has that netbooks never will: the iPhone OS.
People aren't just buying iPhones because of the device and it's capabilities. They're buying it because of the software user experience. Many phones can do what the iPhone does (and some even better) but the reason it's carving out such a huge market share and scaring the bejesus out of RIM, Nokia, Palm etc. is because people get wrapped up in the user experience.
That's what'll happen with the iPad. That's why it'll sell millions and smash up the net book market. It's got heavily patented software that can only be mimicked to a certain degree. Apple crashed the mp3 market and took it over with ease of use software (although it's cool looking players haven't hurt), it did the same with the iPhone and there's no reason why it can't with the iPad.
And didn't I hear that the net book market was in decline even before the debut of the Jesus pad?
I remember a few years ago seeing a voice recognition system without the voice. Basically, a couple of sensors next to the throat monitored muscle movement and translated it into text input. That meant you only had to mouth the words in order to use the speech recognition system. Imagine If that could be turned into a small blue tooth device that sat in your ear but had a flip down piece that touched your throat.
The perfect answer for those who want to use speech recognition but also want things to stay private. And you wouldn't drive those around you insane with your constant chatter.
Are we really supposed to believe that the young, musically intense Paul Hewson didn't have bootlegged recordings of bands in his collection? I mean, come on.......
All those components and all that complexity.
And yet it's still more reliable than my Sky+ box.
We should train them all in brain surgery
... so they can deal with the extra tumour cases that'll arise from people running magnetic fields through their heads.
Grade's got form on this
In charge of the BBC, he tried to kill Doctor Who completely when anyone with half a brain knew that chucking a few quid at it and bringing in a decent writer along with a touch of 'Star Trek the Next Generation' production was all it needed to to successfully refresh. The fanbase alone would have been enough to recoup the investment if it wasn't able to reach a wider audience - which of course it did becoming one of the BBC's best revenue generators in recent years.
Gerry, if you're reading this, tell Grade to piss off, give the BBC a ring and tell them you want to do an updated reboot of UFO. Again, done properly, you're looking at another smash hit.