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* Posts by Natalie Gritpants

391 posts • joined 9 May 2007

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IRS boss on XP migration: 'Classic fix the airplane while you're flying it attempt'

Natalie Gritpants
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FAIL

Fixing an airborne aircraft

No-one has ever built an aircraft that cannot be landed and maintained. If your IT is in this state you only have yourself to blame. Plenty of other IT services have planned maintenance downtime. If yours does not have this feature you should resign and let someone competent take over.

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Intel uncloaks next-gen 'Braswell' Atom, 64-bit Android KitKat kernel

Natalie Gritpants
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Interesting that the penguin is centre stage

but the laptops for the other OSes are open. Maybe Tux's lappy is like the Arc of the Covenant, the contents are so spiffy you will burst into flames if you look upon them.

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Amazon Workspaces: A dish best served later

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Typical useless Microsoft product

Can't speak for the android or chrome desktops but I've been using remote desktops on Linux for about twenty years, there were occasional glitches in keyboard input but zero problems in the last decade.

Not what I'd call a troll.

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Sticky Tahr-fy pudding: Ubuntu 14.04 slickest Linux desktop ever

Natalie Gritpants
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Top bars are bollox

Fitts law is OK when it comes to being easy to whiz to the file menu, but it doesn't address the larger distance who have to go to get the pointer back to where it started after you have done the file/thing menu pick.

Sidebars are much better for saving vertical space. WIndows 7 and KDE do the rather well, mate is OK ish, xfce and gnome were rubbish last time I checked.

Window resizing - meh, been in most X window managers for over twenty years.

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Straight to 8: London's Met Police hatches Win XP escape plan

Natalie Gritpants
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Unbelievable lack of stregic planning

These organizations should have a plan for what to do when WIndows 8 support ceases.

Maybe now is a good time to commit crime in London (and don't declare the income to the tax man).

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Brawling neighbours challenge 'quiet' cul-de-sac myth

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Tip toe through the cat crap

I'd like to stand up for the hard working cats of this country and object to the word lazy. But I can't because that's what cats are. Calling a cat lazy is like calling a cloud wet, it just shows that you don't know much about them.

I don't know how slippery it is. I have a cat and it poos next door. If you don't want cat poo, get a cat. Cheap to run and will remove the mice from your house.

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Bletchley Park board member quits amid TNMOC split-off spat

Natalie Gritpants
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Lord Voldermort or Darth Vader for mediator

After the first few bureaucrats go up in smoke the rest should get on nicely.

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Cameron pitches UK-Germany 5G collaboration to Cebit

Natalie Gritpants
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British engineer here

Fuck you Cameron you disloyal twat.

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Microsoft to push out penultimate XP patch on March Patch Tuesday

Natalie Gritpants
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I see that your computer is infected with the leet virus. Good luck.

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Women! You too can be 'cool' and 'fun' if you work in tech!

Natalie Gritpants
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Wow this new monitor is the coolest

It doesn't even need a power cable. IT rules yay!!!

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Cable thieves hang up on BT, cause MAJOR outage

Natalie Gritpants
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Stop

No, please don't. We have enough stuff being treated as terrorism already. Terrorism usually ends up with people dying not just inconvenienced.

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Hot racks and cool customers: Colocating in the capital

Natalie Gritpants
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With that amount of diesel..

they could run a garage, would solve the problem of the diesel going off

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Seagate's LaCie touts a 25TB (not a typo) box o' disks for your DESK

Natalie Gritpants
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thus reading should be noticeably faster than random writing

I think you mean random writing will be noticeably slower than a glacier.

SMR is the technique used by helical scan tape drives (DDS) to pack the tracks closer than the width of the write head. They also suffer from terrible performance if you don't keep them streaming while writing.

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Big Beardie's watching: Gaze into the screen... it shall gaze also into you

Natalie Gritpants
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Wonder if it can recognize an evil glint in the eye and a box of matches and shut off the petrol pump.

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Mac Pro fanbois can rack 'em and stack 'em like real sysadmins

Natalie Gritpants
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Pah!

I could get eight on a rack that size.

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Hear that, Sigourney? Common names 'may not constitute personal data'

Natalie Gritpants
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Probably right verdict

after all how many Efifiom Edem's are there?

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STRIPPED DOWN and EXPOSED: Business kit from the good old days

Natalie Gritpants
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Yikes, you've stumbled into...

a terrorist cell. No way of tracking down letters from those typewriters. The bedding and gas mask is a hint as to what they were planning. Please leave the office, lock the door and report to your nearest police station.

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Asus unveils dirt-cheap Chromebox desktops with Haswell chips

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Bye ChromeOS

Is it fanless? From the small vents it looks like it's fan cooled.

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Reg snaps moment when Facebook turned air Blu: 1PB box for unloved pics

Natalie Gritpants
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Keep clear of this in the data center

Looks like that front vertical section goes in and out and would probably go right across the alleyway. And it all goes into one bluray drive, hope that's a ruggedized one that can handle the load cycles.

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Margaret Hodge, PAC are scaring off new biz: Treasury source

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: How about...

We already do that. It's called VAT.

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Natalie Gritpants
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Re: How on earth can this happen ...

Except she has crossed the line and lost credibility. Accusing Google of being evil is ridiculous. Accusing others of immoral behaviour shows she is grandstanding as tax is not a moral issue.

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UK smut filter may have sent game patch to sin-bin

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Somehow I don't think so.....

Wessex is an idea, not a place. Just saying.

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Pint-glass-flashing FISHNAPPERS strike at Firefox daddy Mozilla

Natalie Gritpants
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Fishnapper was right

"Tupac actually died" a few days after being returned. But that's OK, Mozilla got some fish back and they can now replace them. What's the half-life of a Tupac?

Suggest they get an aquarium screensaver.

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Intel shutters BRAND NEW chip factory as PC market storm rages

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Its a mess on Intel "et al's" own making...

Like you say, you don't need a more powerful PC and you don't want another five 200W PC's in your home. But you might want twenty 0.1W devices controlling your light, heat and kitchen appliances. Microsoft have dropped the ball on this progress hence the shuttered factory, maybe Google can pick up the baton (Intel have an ARM license)

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Tech titan Bill Gates: Polio-free India one of the 'most impressive accomplishments' ever

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Excellent news

Cutting the death rate of children tends to suppress the birth rate. This has happened n numerous countries at numerous times so no need to worry about the African population exploding just because Malaria is eradicated.

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Twitter: It's JUST LIKE Elder Scrolls (no it's not)

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: >> Mr Dabbs, do I spot a little bit of green eyed monster?!

Yikes, I though it was called the one-eyed trouser snake. If yours is a green eyed monster you should see a doctor

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Blasphemy! Finns trample over Windows Phone home screen

Natalie Gritpants
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IT Angle

"and adds a fraction of a delay (a folder opens in a couple of seconds) to your workflow"

Delays are atomic. You can have a fraction of a second or a short delay. This sounds like a long delay.

Icon for "where's the IT competence?"

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Woman whipped gun from vagina in SPACE ALIEN spat, reports Officer Zook

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Might not have an IT angle, but, you can bet 5 and 6 and James Bond would be impressed...

Bond: I must be dreaming.

FTFY

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Seagate's LaCie whips out bonkers posh silver-plated storage ball

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Photoshopped!

They had to, the photographer is a reflectopornophile as you'll see if you zoom in on the reflection in the glass vase on the window.

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How to kill trolls and influence Apple people: A patent solution

Natalie Gritpants
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Loser pays

Is probably the change that would solve the most bad things but how likely is it that the US legal system will change?

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Feminist Software Foundation gets grumpy with GitHub … or does it?

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Wrong Tools

github for some, bitchhub for others, www.bitchhub.com is availiable (for about 30 seconds)

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Nominet seeks royal approval for pisspoor .uk domain name push

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: ,uk ;uk 'uk

Great can't wait to register my child's domain:

robert'); drop tables dotuk; --

(http://xkcd.com/327/)

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US military's RAY-GUN truck BLASTS DRONES, mortars OUT OF THE SKY

Natalie Gritpants
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Has this been tested on chrome-plated targets?

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Fisher-Price in hot seat: iPad bouncy chair lets APPLE BABYSIT tots – parents

Natalie Gritpants
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Reminds me of A Clockwork Orange, just need something to keep the eyes open.

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UK.gov declares digital success as PR, food shops redefined as 'tech' businesses

Natalie Gritpants
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Stop

Desperation

All companies use email so they're all internet businesses now. Except that they all have workers that commute by car so they're in the transport sector. Oh. and they have coffee machines so they're in the agricultural sector.

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Inside Steve Ballmer’s fondleslab rear-guard action

Natalie Gritpants
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> Only serious weirdos eschew GUIs today.

Bless you, hope the cold gets better.

And thanks for the idea, I'm getting "serious weirdo" put on my CV.

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Quantum crypto pitches for data centre links

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Don't forget one-time-pads are secure

Simply install another link in parallel and send the OTP data from the generator to the other end. Don't forget to subtract 17 from the numbers to prevent snooping.

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Fancy knocking off early? Just run our fake computer crash 'virus', say admen

Natalie Gritpants
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All fine and dandy until the screensaver kicks in

Then communicator/lync tells everyone you've gone home.

That's why you need http://movemouse.codeplex.com running before you flee.

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Lead ONTO your pencil: Bill Gates pours cash into graphene condoms

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Cancer

Who cares? It's made of graphene. Guaranteed to get you laid.

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Qatar whips covers off giant footballing vagina

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Expert on womens' genitalia

I suspect Ms. Breswell was being modest.

Anyone viewing porn will have seen hundreds of examples of both forms of undercarriage so, yes, male readers of the register probably can talk about the length and expertise of other men's penises if they could drag their concentration away from the screen.

As for recognizing your own bits, I wouldn't even know my own hands unless the picture showed the chainsaw scar on my right palm.

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Men have LARGE APPENDAGES, are OXYGEN THIEVES: Science

Natalie Gritpants
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I always breath through my mouth when needing large quantities of oxygen.

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London businesses to signal UNSWERVING LOYALTY to capital with .london domain

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Which London?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/London_(disambiguation) has 13 other Londons

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HUMANITY STUNNED - Apple Retina iPad Mini arrives. A solemn moment

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Retina?

These tiny speakers have no base at all. Normal speakers have to have some base otherwise they would not stand up. Try standing an ipad up and it will fall over due to lack of base.

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Does 'Star Wars' casting call hint at DEATH of LUKE SKYWALKER?

Natalie Gritpants
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WTF?

Why the requirement for smart?

Surely they're looking for actors who can play any intelligence level?

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Anonymous hacktivists' Million Mask March protest hits London

Natalie Gritpants
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Facepalm

Don't tell Anon

but each of those masks has an embedded RFID tag.

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Cash-blackhole Twitter will shower itself in gold by 2015, investors told

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Once Twitter goes public.

Running at a loss is a bad idea in any century.

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HELIUM-FILLED disks lift off: You can't keep these 6TB BEASTS down

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Wouldn't a vacuum be better?

Yes, right up until the point you try to move the heads from the park position to the platters.

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Oz racehorse shod with 3D-printed titanium hoofwear

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: If only someone had told them..

The front legs take about 50% more weight than the rear so maybe they race without rear shoes.

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Unsupervised Brit kids are meeting STRANGERS from the INTERNET

Natalie Gritpants
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Re: Good advice

So you're saying let them have phones and tablets and just tell them stories to keep them safe? My kid is stuck with the family PC until after primary school. My kid has been trained to lie about age/sex/location as routine. Other kids may have phones etc. but they usually also have crap parenting too.

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11m Chinese engulfed by 'Airpocalypse' at 4000% of safe pollution levels

Natalie Gritpants
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> 4,000 per cent as dangerous as the World Health Organization's recommendation

So those things walking around are zombies or the WHO recommendation is not particularly dangerous. "4000% of the WHO recom.." is what you meant. Sticking extra words in a sentence might make you hit your article length target but it can mess up your message.

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