New Unit of Cubic Capacity

To add to the other measures mentioned elsewhere, you now need to introduce a measure called the Fully Dilated Convict Rectum (FDCR). Perhaps this could expressed in Elephants, such as 1 FDCR = 17 micro Elephants or 1 Elephant = 58.8 Kilo FDCRs. Now express it in Firkins.

Treason

Treason doth never prosper.

What's the reason?

If it prosper,

None dare call it treason.

Sir John Harrington

or as Seneca said: successful and fortunate crime is called virtue.

Invade a country, kill 750,00, internally displace 2,500,000, externally displace 2,000,000, corruptly enrich your mates (Cheney and Rumsfeld) and make Iran a regional superpower with significant influence over the irate Shias in Iraq = good

Show this happens = bad

For God's Sake

Why don't Dell just buy NetApp and have done with this? This the the only way that Dell can offer scalable storage, stop giving revenue and margin to a competitor, gain entry to very large sites, expand its professional services and for NetApp to be part of an enterprise services organisation.

Is it ...

... unfeasibly large?

Pikeybase

Vive le Pikeybase Internationale.

Pick a SAN, Any SAN

Don't want an MSA. How about an EVA? Don't want one of those? How about a lovely LeftHand? Not to your liking? Fancy a 3PAR? Or how about an XPS?

SAN for all seasons indeed.

HP storage strategy - what storage strategy?

For the love of God, will somebody buy NetApp and integrate it into their wider products and services.

HP Financially Unbalanced

The big failure of HP and its leadership is to create a truly diversified IT services company. IBM's revenue are very roughly one third each for hardware, software and services. It is well balanced and it is quite good at software sales. Most of HP's revenue is derived from low margin PCs. HP would probably be better financially off exiting the PC business and investing the money elsewhere; the return on assets would be better. HP while selling lots of PCs have never managed to implement the Dell lost-cost supply chain. take a look at the HP Shopping web site and compare it with Dell's. HP have swallowed up a small number of software companies but have not managed to generate any real value from the cost of acquisition. They have all been effectively loss-making deals.

The purchase of EDS gives them a managed services/outsourcing edge as well as providing a home for billions of HP hardware in sites managed by EDS.

HP is just a bundle of unfulfilled potential.

Few Comments

1. The saga began last summer when, following a tip-off, police raided Holland's home looking for indecent images of children.

Did the rozzers then follow-up on the clearly malicioius so-called tip-off? It would not take much thought to produce a short-list of one suspect here. Did they my arse? Doing someone for wasting police team would clearly involve them doing some work. Public servant =

Do Forever

Scratch Arse

Apply Ointment to Sore Arse

End Do

2. Jackman, a solicitor specialising in extreme pornography offences, ...

How do you develop such a specialisation?

Point of Order

" ... Universal Storage Platform - Virtualised (USP-V). There is only one other product like it: IBM's SAN Volume Controller (SVC)."

What about the NetApp V Series?

Bootnote Question

Regarding "* The drooling masses won't have to wait long to get a piece of this action. Lohan will reportedly being going full-frontal for Linda Lovelace biopic Inferno. In this case, it really is a matter of "if the story demands it"."

Will the younger LL also get intimate with a dog to replicate some of the more unusual behaviour of the other older LL, if the story demands it? Let the people speak.

I'd pay a fiver to see that in a cinema.

AH1542

I can recall tweaking jumpers on AH1542s years ago to link SCSI devices to PCs and servers. It is not anything to get nostalgic about. There had to be a better way, even then.

Adaptec just failed to grow, develop and change. The IT industry is littered with the corpses of once large companies that died as competitors flourished around them. Anybody remember Data 100?

It is not anything to get sad about.

HP Dropped the Ball on Storage a Long Time Ago

It started with the EVA 4100/6100 mess that were an interim and stopgap replacement for the ageing 4000/6000/8000. These were then replaced - literally, no in place upgrade - by the mediocre 4400/6400/8400.

HP sell MSAs for a third the price and no a lot less functionality than a EVA. Lefthand are the same price as the EVA. They constantly push EVA/Lefthand where they are not appropriate rather than MSA.

They have poor software for replication and shapshotting.

They really need define a storage strategy and then execute it effectively. To save time, this will probably require a purchase.

Rather than compounding the purchase of Lefthand with another small niche player, I would recommend purchasing a bigger company such as NetApp. This would given them a very broad reach and appeal.

They could then enhance the MSA range with some better software for SMB and ditch the EVA mess.

Anyone Fancy Registering ...

... www.ratemydesignavagina.com?

Mingetastic!

Brings Bank Memories

It ran on what was called the RT 6150 - a complete heap of shite. It was a collection of units - two screens - text and graphic, two keyboards and various other units - dials for zooming, mouse, graphic pad. It was underpowered and overpriced. There were much better units available.

Most of these are gone and you can now get a POWER 595 that can run a multi-national.

Windows 95 and OS/2 Presentation Manager

The Windows 95 interface was based on OS/2. IBM contracted Microsoft to develop OS/2 Presentation Manager, the GUI portion of OS/2 - it also had a CLI. This was in the days when Microsoft was small and IBM still had a relationship with them - primarily from the PC-DOS days. But the copyright on PM resided with Microsoft and not IBM - some piss poor contract drafting by IBM.

The OS/2 PM code was reused to become Windows 95 and has been reused ever since.

I have to agree

Balanced response. No supervision, sad men with lots of spare time and extreme overreaction.

What's The Big Deal

NetApp asynchronous SnapMirror offers cascade and multihop

mirroring - has been available for years + Riverbed for compression = proven solution

Disappointing Alliteration

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch blight

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch bane

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch blot

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch blast

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch bete noir

Bubbly-belly-bugging boffins battle bovine belch burst

Well Argued Document

It is a well-argued document that identifies the stupidity of the judge who granted the injunction, the nonsense of the patent and the ignorance of the USPTO for granting a patent.

You can despise Microsoft and still agree with what they are saying.

The damages calculations are nonsense. What collection of slack-jawed, knuckle-dragging, transgeneration imbeciles came up with these numbers.

You have to pity the Microsoft lawyers who have to travel to Fecal Swamps, Shitsville to try to make informed points in words with a fractional number of syllables so they can be understood by the cross-eyed, twitching, sister-loving, sheep-shagging jury.

VI Only Read Competitor to VMware

VI is/was the only real competitor to VMware. It is/was the only one of the ever more commoditised server virtualisation products that offered the full range of server virtualisation solutions: from P2V to operation, HA, DRS and management.

In some cases, because of its requirement to run on newer chips, it offered better performance than VMware.

What About US and British Pints

How many chains do they get to the hogshead?

Wanktastic

You could take you eye out if one of those hit you.

How come giant paper towels did not evolve in response to this?

Phorm Phactor

£80 million for nothing. C'est phormidable. How much margin do they need to make to recover past losses?

Unless it is some phorm of money laundering exercise, it is an unphunny joke.