* Posts by John G Imrie

1410 posts • joined 17 Jun 2009

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Windows 10 free upgrade offer ends on July 29th

John G Imrie
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They're going to remove May?

Brian or James?

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Barclays.net Bank Holiday outage leaves firms unable to process payments

John G Imrie
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small number.

Why do these status updates always talk of a small number of customers, small against what? Total number of customers or total number that tried to login?

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Twitter loses FISA fight

John G Imrie
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Unhappy

Dimit

FEDS make me like Twitter

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Good enough IT really is good enough. You don't need new hardware

John G Imrie
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Re: The opposite of good enough

is expensive.

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John G Imrie
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Lick that new, new metal...

You are Bender and I claim my £5

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John G Imrie
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why is everything Javascript these days?

Because it pushes the compute cost onto the client/user rather than the server/web site.

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Tokyo rebrands 2020 Olympics

John G Imrie
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Re: No giant robots?

How about some cute girls with pony tails.

And as an after thought, which bits of modern Japan will they be celebrating during the opening ceremony.

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Sysadmin given Licence To Perve shows why you always get it in writing

John G Imrie
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Re: Post Apocalyptic Meltdown yes

Yer looks like the boss was a bit of an arse hole at the start, but when given the documentation backed down with good grace.

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Tweak Privacy Shield rules to make people happy? Nah – US govt

John G Imrie
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Re: Definition of "independent Ombudsman":

Which is why I couldn't do it, I may have flimsy moral standards, but they are still there.

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NYPD anti-crypto Twitter campaign goes about as well as you'd expect

John G Imrie
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Re: File cabinets, closets, and safes?

And the stairs.

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Catastrophic 123-reg VPS cockup deletes Ross County FC website

John G Imrie
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they have a moral obligation to undo that damage.

A moral obligation is worth less than the paper it's written on. Ask a Politician.

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Admin fishes dirty office chat from mistyped-email bin and then ...?

John G Imrie
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Why are you even reading the body of the emails ...

Because sometimes that's the only way to find out which person to send it on to.

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US anti-encryption law is so 'braindead' it will outlaw file compression

John G Imrie
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@ dan1980

I have decoded your comment through my super secret decryption algorithm and it came back with.

'This bill is crap', strangely I get the same message from all the other comments as well.

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Flying Spaghetti Monster is not God, rules mortal judge

John G Imrie
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Re: The judge will soon be in hot water ...

That's a little harsh, the FSM is well knowen to be an easy going god, and I suspect that he is well pleased with this result as it has allowed numerous people who had no knowledge of his existence to become aware of his noodley appendages.

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French thrash Brits, Germans and Portuguese in IT innovation

John G Imrie
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Translation

It said IT leaders here have “largely adopted a conservative approach: prioritising keeping the lights on and the business ticking over, rather than trying to innovate and differentiate.

IT leaders would like to have a job at the end of the month rather than jumping on the latest methodology band wagon.

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Prof Hawking to mail postage-stamp space craft to Alpha Centauri using frickin' lasers

John G Imrie
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We are going to build a space ship.

Who's going to pay.

The Alpha Centaurians

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America's Intelligence Transparency Council to meet for the first time … behind closed doors

John G Imrie
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The Intelligence Transparency Council

As is usual the difficult bit has been relegated to the name of the organisation where it can do no harm.

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Read America's insane draft crypto-borking law that no one's willing to admit they wrote

John G Imrie
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Re: If A -> B, B -> C then A -> C

I've got a Wookie over here.

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Field technicians want to grab my tool and probe my things

John G Imrie
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Confessions of an IoT Repair Lady.

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GCHQ is having problems meeting Osborne's 2020 recruitment target

John G Imrie
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Spook feel bite of general lack of cyber talent in UK – sources

Or it could be that the cyber talent is pissed of with the Spooks

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Google's dream city isn't a new idea

John G Imrie
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Damit

You beat me to it. I thought it sounded more OCP than H. G. Wells.

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Iceland prime minister falls on sword over Panama Papers email leak

John G Imrie
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Re: A bunch of politicians lied?

I'm starting to like Iceland, they jailed their bankers and now their PM has resigned. Then again, around 4.5% of the countries population turned up to protest outside their parliament.

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Strike! EPO staff to walk out this Thursday

John G Imrie
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Re: Who wil notice?

Any of the US companies on the fast track program?

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Waiting for your Oculus to arrive? Yeah, it's going to be some time

John G Imrie
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The Facebook Limits.

Episode one.

In which we discover that Facebook has no limits.

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Flying Finns arm octocopter with chainsaw

John G Imrie
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Happy

Film

Someone somewhere is rewriting a scene in their up coming zombie flick to include an army of these things.

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Elon Musk takes wraps off planet-saving Model 3 vapourmobile

John G Imrie
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Re: It's all very well having the chargers, but how many are there at each location?

it's not uncommon in our part of the UK (SW) to find that people have just parked in the dedicated charging space, thus rendering it useless just because it was a bit closer to the supermarket door than any other space.

That's a simple fix. Move the charging point away from the doors.

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Zombie SCO rises from the grave again

John G Imrie
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Re: Santa Cruz Organisation (SCO) ...

Spiny Norman wants a word with you.

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John G Imrie
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Re: By all means, give them what they want.

I was unaware that there was anyone left who held SCO in such high esteem. You seem to be holding back on what I'd do to them.

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US govt says it has cracked killer's iPhone, legs it from Apple fight

John G Imrie
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Re: Only Apple can help us...

I hope so, but at the time they could have believed this. You can only perjurer your self if you lie. And to lie you have to know that what you are saying is false.

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Closing courts to fling £700m at digital stand-ins will fail, MPs snarl at UK.gov

John G Imrie
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The Future ...

is Dredd

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Met plod commissioner: Fraud victims should not be refunded by banks

John G Imrie
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Re: prove it

our system is secure and, therefore yours must not be, so the fault must be yours.

You can prove that in a court of law can't you?

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Error checks? Eh? What could go wrong, really? (DoSing a US govt site)

John G Imrie
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Re: Moral on the -1 passed as array index?

Use Perl ?

$array[-1]

is the last element of the array

$array[-2]

is the last but one etc.

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Comms 'redlining' in Brussels as explosions kill up to 30 people

John G Imrie
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to be honest I could accept increased levels of physical searches on or near transportation hubs

O goody a long queue of agitated people all ready to be blown up. How far back do you push the security cordon, the airport entrance, the car-park, the roads up to the car-park. This ends with a metal detector on your front door, or possibly your bedroom door.

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Ofcom wants to crack down on pisspoor BT Openreach biz lines

John G Imrie
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Go

A better solution

Ofcom is proposing that, by the end of March 2017, Openreach must complete 80 per cent of leased line orders by the date it promises customers, rising to 90 per cent from April 2018. Under the new proposals, competitors will also be able to use BT’s fibre-optic cables with their own equipment, rather than rely on BT’s equipment

For every appointment BT miss they have to refund 100% of the annual cost of the line. For those times where the weather, accidents, etc. get in the way BT can buy insurance like any one else.

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Hands on with the BBC's Micro:Bit computer. You know, for kids

John G Imrie
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Bring your Daughter to work day

We know how well that ended, don't we.

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What to call a £200m 15,000-tonne polar vessel – how about Boaty McBoatface?

John G Imrie
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Gimp

Re: Good Ship Venus

# Sit on my Boatface and tell me that you love me.

With apologies to Python, Monty

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Lessons from history for UK Home Sec Theresa May's Investigatory Powers Bill

John G Imrie
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Re: "Security Camera" term needs to be dropped.

"Attention ground units. Anticitizen reported in this community. Code: lock, cauterize, stabilize."

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Brits seek rousing name for polar research vessel

John G Imrie
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How about 'Expotition'

From chapter eight of The Complete Tales of Winnie-the-Pooh 'In which Christopher Robin Leads an Expotition to the North Pole'

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Why should you care about Google's AI winning a board game?

John G Imrie
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Re: i for one....

Until it can make a really good cup of tea I think we are safe.

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I beg you, please don't back up that secret directory full of photos!

John G Imrie
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Re: Cannot unsee ...

The next morning my colleague found all his pr0n files contained a photo of the PHB grinning and holding up a card reading "Don't do this again".

I rather like his boss' attitude over this :-)

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David Cameron hints at Budget law change to end mobile not-spots

John G Imrie
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Re: cue the Anti Mast campaigns

The single biggest obstacle is the law which prevents mobile companies sharing equipment at sites.

Which law's that? Not a troll I really want to know

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Data protection: Don't be an emotional knee jerk. When it comes to the law, RTFM

John G Imrie
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Re: Euphemisms

"Safe Harbour" and "Privacy Shield" where the titles of the treaties. To quote Sir Humphrey Appleby -

you always dispose of the difficult bit in the title. It does less harm there than on the statute books

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FBI says NY judge went too far in ruling the FBI went too far in forcing Apple to unlock iPhone

John G Imrie
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Paris Hilton

Re: The Era of the Warrant is Over

Unfortunately, they probably hold dirt on everyone by now so I suspect a correction is becoming more and more impossible.

So the only person who can fix this is someone who doesn't give a fuck about their public persona. All hail President Paris Hilton.

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Sexism isn't getting better in Silicon Valley, it's getting worse

John G Imrie
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Happy

@codejunky

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John G Imrie
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International men's day.

19th November, or didn't read the article.

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John G Imrie
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Re: Dr Sue Black

So how would you react if a bloke gave you flowers?

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Californian tycoons stole my sharing economy, says Lily Cole

John G Imrie
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Re: Lily!

And that's a problem because ...

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How exactly do you rein in a wildly powerful AI before it enslaves us all?

John G Imrie
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Re: Isaac Asimov

On of my favourite Asimov stories is 'The Evitable Conflict' And one of the scariest answers a computer can produce is "The matter admits of no explanation". I think that ranks along side 'I'm sorry Dave I can't do that'

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BBC telly tax drops onto telly-free households. Cough up, iPlayer fans

John G Imrie
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A solution

First time you start iplayer create user name, password and type in your TV licence number

Subsequently:-

Start iplayer anywhere in the world.

Type in user name

Type in password

Watch live BBC TV

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Dirty data: Tech-heavy Thames Valley scores big in adultery index

John G Imrie
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Re: since when has Guildford been in the Thames Valley?

Global warming?

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