* Posts by ian 22

770 posts • joined 17 Jun 2009

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Are you clever enough, and brave enough, to give a Register lecture

ian 22
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I've nothing to say

... But I can speak at length about it.

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Paul Allen hunts down sunken Japanese WWII super-battleship

ian 22
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Re: Last gasps of the battleship

@Destroy All Monsters

"Why not stay home in that case?"

That is a question best put to the likes of Messrs. Bliar, Bush, and Cheney.

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ian 22
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Re: The guns aren't (just) for firing at other ships

@LDS: the Iowa is now a museum in Long Beach, California. I had the opportunity to visit her recently, and was shown a faint scuff mark somewhere on her superstructure. It seems she was struck by a Japanese 5-inch shell- it barely scratched the paint!

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A gold MacBook with just ONE USB port? Apple, you're DRUNK

ian 22
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Re: Welcome to the wireless world

That's right, I had forgotten! Apple murdered the floppy- in cold blood! Bastards. Now they're sharpening their knives for thumb drives. Will no one stop them? Will we be forced into a wireless world of unwanted convenience?

Everything is becoming disembodied and flying into the clouds, like an Escher engraving.

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BLOOD STAR of the NEANDERTHALS passed close to our Sun

ian 22
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Re: 0.8AU or 0.8 Light Years?

There would be no confusion if the author had used standard units of length, in this case, bendy buses.

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Love rats show sex while drunk will sober you up, say boffins

ian 22
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Re: Sex when drunk

The article seems to say beer goggles come off after one ... er... gets off.

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ALIENS are surely AMONG US: Average star has TWO potentially Earth-like worlds

ian 22
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Re: any intelligent life more than 100 light years away...

Intelligent Humans? I think we flatter ourselves. The Dolphins know better.

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Alibaba's magic cave empties as it misses revenue target

ian 22
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Re: It aint just fakes.

@the other Ian

Would you accept a Paris knockoff? The real one is currently out of stock.

PS: bubble wrap is extra.

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How's this for customer service: Comcast calls bloke an A**HOLE – and even puts it in print

ian 22
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"The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

Shredding will do nicely though.

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Nexus 6 would have had a fingerprint reader, but Apple RUINED IT ALL

ian 22
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Boffin

Re: What's the big deal?

I'll need to keep all this in mind when considering a replacement for my mobe- the one with my secret plan for world domination.

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SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS that 2014 was record HOTTEST year? NO

ian 22
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So climate change not a problem then?

So glad to hear that everything will be back to normal next year.

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Saudi Arabia to flog man 1,000 times for insulting religion on Facebook

ian 22
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Re: Je suis Charlie...

@Swiss Anton: laugh if you like. *I* have the body of a Greek god- the fat one.

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ian 22
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Re: Yo, Prophet Mohammed...

It must be depressing to be loved by idiots....

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Solar-powered bra maker suffers 20,000 TITSUPs all at once

ian 22
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Re: New-Age Flim-Flam!

While I'd like to be supportive of this effort, it looks shocking.

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FCC to smack Sprint with $105m fine over 'cramming' – report

ian 22
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Re: jail time

It seems the Supreme Court has ruled corporations are people, if so, banging one up would be quite entertaining. In this case the phrase 'criminal enterprize' is redundant.

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The future looks bright: Prepare to be dazzled by HDR telly tech

ian 22
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Thumb Down

Re: I'll wait thanks

Not to "Nit" pick, but there is no source of 4K nor high-Nit signals.

Why should anyone expend their hard-earned currency for Tellies with no function?

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US Navy's LASER CANNON WARSHIP: USS Ponce sent to Gulf

ian 22
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Headmaster

Re: It was named after the explorer Juan Ponce de León

I believe it was named after the city of Ponce in Puerto Rico (a colony of the U.S.).

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Mom and daughter SUE Comcast for 'smuggling' public Wi-Fi hotspot into their home

ian 22
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Re: No Problem

Bah. Neither Elvis nor Bigfoot are reliable sources. You should've looked it up on Wikipedia instead. Far more reliable. Joseph Stalin told me so.

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Hi-torque tank engines: EXTREME car hacking with The Register

ian 22
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Flywheel?

Lovely article, never know what I'll find in Motor Age ^W^W The Register.

I'd understood a flywheel was needed to compensate for internal combustion engine's low torque. Do these massive beasts really need flywheels? It would seem they have enough torque to avoid stalling when the clutch is engaged in first gear!

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Renewable energy 'simply WON'T WORK': Top Google engineers

ian 22
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Re: reducing energy consumption

Reducing birth rates is one half of the equation. The other half is reducing the number of existing humans. Mother Nature could easily take care of that in the way she usually does with populations that outgrow their resources: disease, famine, and conflict.

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SEX BEAST SEALS may be egging each other on to ATTACK PENGUINS

ian 22
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Re: More sites to be blocked?

Yes, this's bestiality at its worst, and must be banned. Wait aren't seals beasts, and so bestiality is normal to them?

This is all too complicated for me.

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Scientists skeptical of Lockheed Martin's truck-sized FUSION reactor breakthrough boast

ian 22
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Re: why are they looking for outside investment for this?

But can I use it to make bacon sarnies?

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This isn't a sci-fi movie: It's a human-made probe snapping a comet selfie

ian 22
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Re: I have to say...

Cue obligatory paranoid "it's all done in a photographer's studio" comments in... 5, 4, 3, ...

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Footie fracas: MYSTERY DRONE waves flag, incites Balkan brawl

ian 22
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Re: So what's next?

In Mexico, no game between the national university (UNAM) and traditional rival Politecnico was complete without the traditional firing of small ballistic missiles at one another's stands.

Given the world's current state, today the missiles would likely be Qassams or RPG-7s.

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Ancient Brits 'set wealthy man's FANCY CHARIOT on FIRE' – boffins

ian 22
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Re: A miracle of survival

So class envy is an ancient religion?

Yes, I too worship at the altar of the burning Porsche.

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US astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson: US is losing science race

ian 22
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Re: Wait, Alan Turing was a Victorian now?

And Turing was destroyed by Victorian laws.

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Want to see the back of fossil fuels? Calm down, hippies. CAPITALISM has an answer

ian 22
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Re: Oil subsidies...

http://www.forbes.com/sites/energysource/2012/04/25/the-surprising-reason-that-oil-subsidies-persist-even-liberals-love-them/

For those who do not believe petroleum is subsidized in America, the above link offers a contrary (and more informed) view.

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ian 22
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Mushroom

Good point

There are two ways to achieve energy nirvana, as I'm sure Worstall has noticed. You can (as he suggested) reduce the price of clean energy relative to fossil, or increase the price of fossil relative to clean. The latter has been achieved through government intervention (subsidies for clean, tax fossil), or as seems likely, destruction of the Middle Eastern oil fields.

It's the height of folly to base the world economy on the stability of a pack of dictatorships. The whole thing is a house of cards. The nuclear fireball icon seems justified.

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Xbox hackers snared US ARMY APACHE GUNSHIP ware - Feds

ian 22
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Re: hmmm

The article does state Western Australian laws and legal procedures apply to the unnamed perpetrator. Do you think he'll (gender assumption here) be deported to America?

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Japan develops robot CHEERLEADERS which RIDE on BALLS

ian 22
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Re: while it may look cheesy

To paraphrase the "any technology sufficiently advanced is indistinguishable to magic" quote, any technology sufficiently weird is indistinguishable to crazy. The Japanese do the best weird

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Indian MOM just LOVES it on Mars, tweets fave holiday snap

ian 22
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Re: Congratulations India.

Please define launch costs. Fuel, hardware, ground control, communications, launch facilities, tracking, etc?

If the all-inclusive cost is so little, are you implying $60 million were expended on a 13kg payload? Or are there other expenses involved?

No, I am not an accountant! Merely pedantic.

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ian 22
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Re: Congratulations India.

India ARE to be congratulated. Well done for a first attempt! I'm sure the price paid is far less than the cost of nuclear weapons research.

As to the utility of MOM, at 13kg, I wouldn't expect much. Also I would think a Falcon 9 (at $50 million) could hurl 13kg to Mars, leaving $24 million for payload. Not a criticism, but we must maintain perspective.

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Moon landing was real and WE CAN PROVE IT, says Nvidia

ian 22
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Pint

Re: To all conspiracy muppets out there

Well done that man! I'd call that joined up thinking!

'Ave an upvote on me.

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Register journo battles Sydney iPHONE queue, FONDLES BIG 'UN

ian 22
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iOS 8 impression

Installed iOS 8 on my (admittedly obsolete) iPad 2 and iPhone 5 and found it hesitates as I enter text. Either this is Apples way of encouraging me to upgrade to fit for purpose hardware, or it is a failing to be corrected in version 8.1.

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WRISTJOB LOVE BONANZA: justWatch sex app promises blind date hookups

ian 22
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Aye, beer goggles are less spendy and more fun.

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Will Apple give Chinese iPhone workers cancer? THE TRUTH

ian 22
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Re: About time...

Speaking of skewed demographics, what is the incidence of luekaemia in the general population? Does the lovely air quality in the region not affect it? I suspect a bit of hexane in the factory air is not the worst of their problems.

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SCREW YOU, Russia! NASA lobs $6.8bn at Boeing AND SpaceX to run space station taxis

ian 22
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Trollface

Re: Hail, Hail, Hail!

Yanks destroyed Iraq, now they want to destroy Ebola. Destroy, destroy, destroy. It's all they know...

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MIT boffins cry havoc and let slip the ROBOT CHEETAHS of Whoa

ian 22
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@inventor of the ML (TLDW)

Upvote for the Philip K. Dick reference.

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Moto 360: Neat gizmo – if you're a rich nerd

ian 22
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Re: siri et al

You must learn Klingon. I've found Klingon is 100% compatible with Siri AND whatever the other "voice recognition" system is called.

One major problem is translating between Klingon and English. "Release" is most closely translated as "software has battled its way to tactical supremacy". Etc. Perhaps not the most convenient use of voice recog.

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Want to buy a Woz-made Apple I? If you need to ask the price, you can't afford it

ian 22
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Re: Living Computer Museum- Seattle

No punched card, I've seen more than enough of them. However I was surprised to see someone still produces them, the last of the buggy-whip makers. Who uses punched cards now?

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ian 22
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Living Computer Museum- Seattle

I spent a nostalgia-filled afternoon at the museum in Seattle recently. Many working computers Kaypro, Macintosh, and similar. Even an IBM System 360/91 console, its many lights operated by a hidden microcomputer tucked away out of sight. I was struck by how primitive they all were. Utter crap, but how I lusted after them back in the day.

The museum has a fully functional "computer room" with raised floor and vast AC. The cold, the smell, the disc packs, the huge lumbering mainframes (CDC Cyber Series machine, DECSystem 10s and 20s, even a Xerox Sigma 9), all functional. Took me back to old times.

If ever you visit Seattle, visit the Living Computer Museum.

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Elon Musk says Tesla's stock price is too high ... welp, NOT ANY MORE

ian 22
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Windows

Re: Must be nice to not pay taxes

Please Mister Musk, may I have another? (Tugs forelock, assumes subservient pose).

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One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot

ian 22
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Re: I'd buy that for a Dollar!

The video seems to indicate a loose connexion, possibly indicating fragile, gaudy tat.

Sorry, I'll continue to use my completely non-autonomous Miele.

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Google's 'Captain Moonshot': I will BOMB you with DELIVERIES

ian 22
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Re: Sorry...

Bulldust? Don't you mean "drone droppings"?

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Software bug caught Galileo sats in landslide, no escape from reality

ian 22
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Happy

Re: Bad code, or bad setup?

Nah, neither. The computer fooked up.

Bloody lazy computers, sit on their arses all day eating chips and reading trashy computer-matched romances.

At least that's what we used to tell customers.

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Boffins attempt to prove the UNIVERSE IS JUST A HOLOGRAM

ian 22
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Re: Sock gnomes

@Mycho: due to conservation of mass, the socks become hangers. No need for alternate universes. Occam's Razor shaves clean.

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CRR-CRRRK, beep, beep: Mars space truck backs out of slippery sand trap

ian 22
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Happy

Mars vehicle recalled for defective tyres

"Simply bring it in to your local JPL dealership and we'll fix it for free"

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Detroit losing MILLIONS because it buys CHEAP BATTERIES – report

ian 22
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Re: Only a complete idiot...

Symptomatic of all that has befallen Detroit.

American automotive industry went all penny wise/pound foolish and built cars designed to fail. When the Japanese began selling quality, Detroit was doomed. Now this.

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Know what Ferguson city needs right now? It's not Anonymous doxing random people

ian 22
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Meh

The local populace know who the plod is. It seems he's constantly bashing heads (black ones).

More interesting are the heavy weapons being deployed against anyone who objects to being abused by the police. Armoured vehicles? Sniper rifles? Automatic weapons? When will they bring out the F16s with "Ferguson Police Department" emblazoned on them?

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Intel forced to shoot down viral 'Israeli boycott' whopper

ian 22
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Alert

@Hans1

"Israel needs to go back to the borders of 1947, end of discussion. "

While I think these sorts of flame wars are pointless, and I'm amazed the secular left supports medieval obscurantist religious nutters, I do have to ask: the Palestinians rejected the 1947 borders as designated by UN at the time. Why do you think they will accept them now? It does appear that ship has sailed.

I think I've just crossed the event horizon.....

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