* Posts by ian 22

793 posts • joined 17 Jun 2009

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‘Clandestines' prompt British border blockade in France

ian 22

Why are they coming to Blighty?

I'm certain these are gastronomic refugees, fleeing atrocious French cooking. Coq au Vin? They want bangers and mash! Pate de Foi Gras? They want fried Mars bars!

The sun never sets on British cuisine.

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Space station cabbage: To boldly grow where no veg has grown before

ian 22

Breathtaking video

So close! Not mentioned in the article is the fact that SpaceX flies many changes/revisions on each launch. An interesting modification to the "build early and often" principle in software.

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Britain beats back Argies over Falklands online land grab

ian 22

Re: Argies are too late

Perhaps the Argies would accept .fkall. Or even .fkarg!

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Apple pulls Civil War games in Confederate flag takedown

ian 22

Re: I find it interesting

Racialism in all it's manifestations and symbols must be eradicated. Any fool flying the 'stars and bars' will now know what others are thinking of him.

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Tesla says Model 3 is still on schedule, despite being delayed again

ian 22

2018?

It's all well and good for it to be on offer in 2018, but it had better be self-driving otherwise it'll never compete with the many other cars with that feature due in 2020.

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SpaceX gets ready to crash barge-land ANOTHER rocket

ian 22

@Annihilator

Good point. Also, assuming SpaceX successfully implements first stage reuseability, how many customers will want to risk their precious payloads to refurbished launch vehicles? I understand the mechanical stresses of launch (and now landing) are immense and may seriously degrade the launch vehicle's airframe.

I hope SpaceX succeeds, but won't be surprised if reuse is more expensive than anticipated.

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ian 22

Re: I'll go with Wernher von Braun there.

"That's not my department". It was in 1944/45.

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FLICK my FLINT and SNIFF my TREE on the streets of Naples

ian 22

Re: Another hazard of Naples

Did Little Trees ameliorate (lovely word that) Vesuvius' sulphurous exhalations? Imagine the conflagration when lava comes in contact with millions of those disposable lighters.

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Graphene sheaths could boost processor signal speeds by 30 per cent

ian 22

Graphene, is there anything it can't do?

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Climate change alarmism is a religious belief – it's official

ian 22

Re: Frankie is changing my mind about Popes

@James O'Shea

Lovely, and I thought I was the only bomb thrower! Well said! 'Ave an upvote.

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ian 22

Re: In other words, "When to act"

Who to trust in regards to AGW? Scientist, the majority of whom (in many disciplines) say that it is happening? Or right-wing politicians and plutocrats. Hmm. So hard to decide...

Then the Pope steps in and says it is a moral issue, and a (at least one) right-wing politico (American, Republican, presidential-candidate-of-the-week, Roman Catholic, not naming names) tells the Pope to sod off and to tend to his (religious) knitting. This in spite of RC theology stating papal inerrancy in matters theological. If the Pope states an issue is a religious one, then he is inerrant, and the pol is either a schismatic or a heretic. I'm waiting with bated breath to see which Santorum is.

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Zionists stole my SHOE, claims Muslim campaigner

ian 22

Re: IT angle?

Hmm, sneakernet! Must have dropped a packet. Clearly he's using Unreliable Delivery Protocol (UDP).

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ian 22

Apply Occam's razor, and you'll agree it was poltergeists. Clearly the simplest explanation! Either that or MI5.

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Using leather in 'leccy cars is 'unTesla', rages vegan shareholder

ian 22

It may speak volumes that Mr. Peters considers cows to be sentient.

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ian 22

Re: Jackboots

And do they really know how many vinyls have to die to upholster their Tesla?

Don't have a cow, man!

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Large Hadron Collider gives young ALICE a black-hole ray gun

ian 22

Re: "The LHC is absolutely safe," said Hawking

"... and nothing terrible happens."

Yet.

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By the Rivers of Babylon, where the Antikythera Mechanism laid down

ian 22

Re: It's not a computer though

there is thinking that the device is an astronomical calculator used specifically to predict when the games in various Greek city states were to occur.

A bit like a calculator would be used nowadays to compute the size of a bribe to FIFA needed to buy the location of the next World Cup games.

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Airbus confirms software brought down A400M transport plane

ian 22

"Last week, Airbus CEO Tom Enders had complained that the company needed the black box data, which was being withheld by Spanish agencies, to conduct its analysis of the crash."

Aha! So that's Enders game is it.

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Candlelit vigil planned to honour executed Newcastle cow Bessie

ian 22

Aye, the grass is always greener...

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SUPERVOLCANIC MAGMA reservoir BUBBLING under Yellowstone Park

ian 22

Re: Uh oh....

Gaia wants to kills us all!

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Hubble hits 25th anniversary IN SPAAACE – time for telescope to come home

ian 22

Re: Who really believes the mirror tale anymore?

WTF? Lockheed didn't make Hubbel's mirror! That was Perkin-Elmer. With such a name (sorry, Elmer Fudd) what could have been expected?

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ian 22

Re: A lot can happen...

Very likely we'll be buying tours of the "Orbital Greats" from Mr. Musk (or Sir Branson). Hubble being one of the major attractions, of course.

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Tests show HTC, Sammy phablets BEND just like iPhone 6 Plus

ian 22

Re: It is all about the case

Not all about the buttocks? Surely those with more curvaceous glutea maxima will cause greater damage to their maxiphones.

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Are you clever enough, and brave enough, to give a Register lecture

ian 22

I've nothing to say

... But I can speak at length about it.

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Paul Allen hunts down sunken Japanese WWII super-battleship

ian 22

Re: Last gasps of the battleship

@Destroy All Monsters

"Why not stay home in that case?"

That is a question best put to the likes of Messrs. Bliar, Bush, and Cheney.

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ian 22

Re: The guns aren't (just) for firing at other ships

@LDS: the Iowa is now a museum in Long Beach, California. I had the opportunity to visit her recently, and was shown a faint scuff mark somewhere on her superstructure. It seems she was struck by a Japanese 5-inch shell- it barely scratched the paint!

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A gold MacBook with just ONE USB port? Apple, you're DRUNK

ian 22

Re: Welcome to the wireless world

That's right, I had forgotten! Apple murdered the floppy- in cold blood! Bastards. Now they're sharpening their knives for thumb drives. Will no one stop them? Will we be forced into a wireless world of unwanted convenience?

Everything is becoming disembodied and flying into the clouds, like an Escher engraving.

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BLOOD STAR of the NEANDERTHALS passed close to our Sun

ian 22

Re: 0.8AU or 0.8 Light Years?

There would be no confusion if the author had used standard units of length, in this case, bendy buses.

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Love rats show sex while drunk will sober you up, say boffins

ian 22

Re: Sex when drunk

The article seems to say beer goggles come off after one ... er... gets off.

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ALIENS are surely AMONG US: Average star has TWO potentially Earth-like worlds

ian 22

Re: any intelligent life more than 100 light years away...

Intelligent Humans? I think we flatter ourselves. The Dolphins know better.

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Alibaba's magic cave empties as it misses revenue target

ian 22

Re: It aint just fakes.

@the other Ian

Would you accept a Paris knockoff? The real one is currently out of stock.

PS: bubble wrap is extra.

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How's this for customer service: Comcast calls bloke an A**HOLE – and even puts it in print

ian 22

"The first thing we do, let's kill all the lawyers."

Shredding will do nicely though.

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Nexus 6 would have had a fingerprint reader, but Apple RUINED IT ALL

ian 22
Boffin

Re: What's the big deal?

I'll need to keep all this in mind when considering a replacement for my mobe- the one with my secret plan for world domination.

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SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS that 2014 was record HOTTEST year? NO

ian 22

So climate change not a problem then?

So glad to hear that everything will be back to normal next year.

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Saudi Arabia to flog man 1,000 times for insulting religion on Facebook

ian 22

Re: Je suis Charlie...

@Swiss Anton: laugh if you like. *I* have the body of a Greek god- the fat one.

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ian 22

Re: Yo, Prophet Mohammed...

It must be depressing to be loved by idiots....

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Solar-powered bra maker suffers 20,000 TITSUPs all at once

ian 22

Re: New-Age Flim-Flam!

While I'd like to be supportive of this effort, it looks shocking.

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FCC to smack Sprint with $105m fine over 'cramming' – report

ian 22

Re: jail time

It seems the Supreme Court has ruled corporations are people, if so, banging one up would be quite entertaining. In this case the phrase 'criminal enterprize' is redundant.

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The future looks bright: Prepare to be dazzled by HDR telly tech

ian 22
Thumb Down

Re: I'll wait thanks

Not to "Nit" pick, but there is no source of 4K nor high-Nit signals.

Why should anyone expend their hard-earned currency for Tellies with no function?

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US Navy's LASER CANNON WARSHIP: USS Ponce sent to Gulf

ian 22
Headmaster

Re: It was named after the explorer Juan Ponce de León

I believe it was named after the city of Ponce in Puerto Rico (a colony of the U.S.).

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Mom and daughter SUE Comcast for 'smuggling' public Wi-Fi hotspot into their home

ian 22

Re: No Problem

Bah. Neither Elvis nor Bigfoot are reliable sources. You should've looked it up on Wikipedia instead. Far more reliable. Joseph Stalin told me so.

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Hi-torque tank engines: EXTREME car hacking with The Register

ian 22

Flywheel?

Lovely article, never know what I'll find in Motor Age ^W^W The Register.

I'd understood a flywheel was needed to compensate for internal combustion engine's low torque. Do these massive beasts really need flywheels? It would seem they have enough torque to avoid stalling when the clutch is engaged in first gear!

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Renewable energy 'simply WON'T WORK': Top Google engineers

ian 22

Re: reducing energy consumption

Reducing birth rates is one half of the equation. The other half is reducing the number of existing humans. Mother Nature could easily take care of that in the way she usually does with populations that outgrow their resources: disease, famine, and conflict.

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SEX BEAST SEALS may be egging each other on to ATTACK PENGUINS

ian 22

Re: More sites to be blocked?

Yes, this's bestiality at its worst, and must be banned. Wait aren't seals beasts, and so bestiality is normal to them?

This is all too complicated for me.

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Scientists skeptical of Lockheed Martin's truck-sized FUSION reactor breakthrough boast

ian 22

Re: why are they looking for outside investment for this?

But can I use it to make bacon sarnies?

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This isn't a sci-fi movie: It's a human-made probe snapping a comet selfie

ian 22

Re: I have to say...

Cue obligatory paranoid "it's all done in a photographer's studio" comments in... 5, 4, 3, ...

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Footie fracas: MYSTERY DRONE waves flag, incites Balkan brawl

ian 22

Re: So what's next?

In Mexico, no game between the national university (UNAM) and traditional rival Politecnico was complete without the traditional firing of small ballistic missiles at one another's stands.

Given the world's current state, today the missiles would likely be Qassams or RPG-7s.

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Ancient Brits 'set wealthy man's FANCY CHARIOT on FIRE' – boffins

ian 22
Flame

Re: A miracle of survival

So class envy is an ancient religion?

Yes, I too worship at the altar of the burning Porsche.

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US astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson: US is losing science race

ian 22

Re: Wait, Alan Turing was a Victorian now?

And Turing was destroyed by Victorian laws.

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Want to see the back of fossil fuels? Calm down, hippies. CAPITALISM has an answer

ian 22

Re: Oil subsidies...

http://www.forbes.com/sites/energysource/2012/04/25/the-surprising-reason-that-oil-subsidies-persist-even-liberals-love-them/

For those who do not believe petroleum is subsidized in America, the above link offers a contrary (and more informed) view.

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