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* Posts by ian 22

728 posts • joined 17 Jun 2009

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One step closer to ROBOT BUTLERS: Dyson flashes vid of VACUUM SUCKER bot

ian 22
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Re: I'd buy that for a Dollar!

The video seems to indicate a loose connexion, possibly indicating fragile, gaudy tat.

Sorry, I'll continue to use my completely non-autonomous Miele.

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Google's 'Captain Moonshot': I will BOMB you with DELIVERIES

ian 22
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Re: Sorry...

Bulldust? Don't you mean "drone droppings"?

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Software bug caught Galileo sats in landslide, no escape from reality

ian 22
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Happy

Re: Bad code, or bad setup?

Nah, neither. The computer fooked up.

Bloody lazy computers, sit on their arses all day eating chips and reading trashy computer-matched romances.

At least that's what we used to tell customers.

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Boffins attempt to prove the UNIVERSE IS JUST A HOLOGRAM

ian 22
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Re: Sock gnomes

@Mycho: due to conservation of mass, the socks become hangers. No need for alternate universes. Occam's Razor shaves clean.

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CRR-CRRRK, beep, beep: Mars space truck backs out of slippery sand trap

ian 22
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Happy

Mars vehicle recalled for defective tyres

"Simply bring it in to your local JPL dealership and we'll fix it for free"

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Detroit losing MILLIONS because it buys CHEAP BATTERIES – report

ian 22
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Re: Only a complete idiot...

Symptomatic of all that has befallen Detroit.

American automotive industry went all penny wise/pound foolish and built cars designed to fail. When the Japanese began selling quality, Detroit was doomed. Now this.

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Know what Ferguson city needs right now? It's not Anonymous doxing random people

ian 22
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Meh

The local populace know who the plod is. It seems he's constantly bashing heads (black ones).

More interesting are the heavy weapons being deployed against anyone who objects to being abused by the police. Armoured vehicles? Sniper rifles? Automatic weapons? When will they bring out the F16s with "Ferguson Police Department" emblazoned on them?

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Intel forced to shoot down viral 'Israeli boycott' whopper

ian 22
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Alert

@Hans1

"Israel needs to go back to the borders of 1947, end of discussion. "

While I think these sorts of flame wars are pointless, and I'm amazed the secular left supports medieval obscurantist religious nutters, I do have to ask: the Palestinians rejected the 1947 borders as designated by UN at the time. Why do you think they will accept them now? It does appear that ship has sailed.

I think I've just crossed the event horizon.....

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SCORE: Rosetta probe hits orbit of duck-shaped comet

ian 22
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OMG!

It's the Duck of Death if it collides with Earth!

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HUMAN RACE PERIL: Not nukes, it'll be AI that kills us off, warns Musk

ian 22
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Mushroom

Re: or we wait until the batteries go flat or catch fire

"Imagine a bipedal robot or other system capable of covering rough terrain that can fight it's way into a power plant, secure bunker or target of your choice and then blow itself up."

That exists now. It's called a 'suicide bomber'.

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Thin naked model slips out of Apple's secretive lab ... it's an 'iPad Air 2'

ian 22
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What is ....

"Elam"?

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BAD VIBES: High-speed video camera records your voice from trash

ian 22
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Happy

Re: Laser eavesdropping

I think we should use the cone of silence.

Get smart, man.

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We sent a probe SIX BILLION km to measure temperature of a COMET doing 135,000 km/h

ian 22
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Headmaster

Re: Speed trap.

Measure to human scale is irrelevant?

I was taught (and sincerely believe) Man is the measure of all things.

If you disagree, take it up with Protagoras.

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Mars rover 2020: Oxygen generation and 6 more amazing experiments

ian 22
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Re: it's own space shuttle and can go get it

Yes, that would be XH558. Give generously to the Vulcan To The Sky Club, hourly cost to fly Vulcan is £3500, if I remember correctly.

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ICANN can't hand over Iran's internet, bomb victims told

ian 22
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Optional title

So the corrected name is ICANN'T?

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ian 22
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Re: A fine idea

I seem to recall a treaty giving diplomatic personnel "immunity", it being immunity from traffic fines, prosecution for any number of felonies, etc. So yes, the British embassy need not pay traffic fines, as the American embassy need not.

In other news, the taking of diplomats hostage as Iran did, is considered bad form, even an act of war.

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Boffins spot weirder quantum capers as neutrons take the high road, spin takes the low

ian 22
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Black Helicopters

@skelband

You have been taken in by the Heliocentric Conspiracy! You can clearly see the sun rise in the East and set in the West. It is intuitively obvious the Sun moves and we are still! All else (moon landings, satellites, et al) is dross and falsehood.

Mines the one with the tinfoil hat in the glove box.

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Apple 'sapphire glass' fronts for iPhone 6? It's NEWS to SUPPLIERS

ian 22
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Re: who more anal, the analyst or the analyst who analyses him?

Do two analysts who don't know what they are talking about know less than a single analyst who doesn't know what he's talking about?

Experience (and anecdotes) have shown that is in fact the case. Two clueless analysts will encourage one another to go out on a limb that a single analyst would be too cautious to attempt.

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SMELL YOU LATER, LOSERS – Dumbo tells rats, dogs... humans

ian 22
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Windows

Re: Evolution knows what it's doing.

I bathe every 6 months whether I need it or not.

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Climate: 'An excuse for tax hikes', scientists 'don't know what they're talking about'

ian 22
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FAIL

Re: @Graham Marsden Cipher - In the 1970s...

Irongut, surely you know most of the populace are mushrooms, kept in the dark and fed shite.

If you get your 'scientific opinion' from popular media consider the fact most writers have no scientific knowledge whatsoever, but do know FUD sells.

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Forty-five years ago: FOOTPRINTS FOUND ON MOON

ian 22
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Chinese chest puffing?

Seems more like wang waving.

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Malaysian Airlines flight MH17 claimed lives of HIV/AIDS cure scientists

ian 22
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Re: So sad

Mandatory KAL007 reference: The Russians do have some experience shooting down airliners.

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Native Americans KILLED AND ATE DUMBO, say archaeologists

ian 22
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Headmaster

Re: Lovable Hippos

Hippos are not only in Africa. A now deceased (he is no more, dead, passed on, etc.) drug lord imported several for his estate in Colombia. After said drug lord met his end, the hippos were left to their own devices, one of which is reproducing. There are now almost 100 of these demonic beasts, and they continue to multiply as no one has the temerity to challenge them.

It's this sort of knowledge has made me the success I am today (for some value of 'success').

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Hamas hacks Israeli TV sat channel to broadcast pics of Gaza wounded

ian 22
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Re: They (and really everyone else) don't get it

Hamas will agree to a truce only after they've killed enough Palestinians.

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SpaceX FINALLY lobs six sats into orbit (don't mention the landing)

ian 22
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Re: Trailblazer or also ran

@bholder

A decade later? Have you seen film of our "rocket ships" bombarding beaches on D-Day? Impressive, that.

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Airbus promises Wi-Fi – yay – and 3D movies (meh) in new A330

ian 22
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Re: It's all very wonderful

Pain? You don't know pain. But you will.

Airbus has just patented bicycle seating for its aircraft. Sorry, no handlebars unless you upgrade to steerage. Now imagine an 8-hour flight on one of those.

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Watch: DARPA shows off first successful test of STEERABLE bullet

ian 22
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Re: My hopes are dashed

Re Hiram Maxim:

I suspect Hiram knew exactly how his machine gun would be used and to what ends. He was advised by a friend that the Europeans wanted to slaughter one another, and they would love to buy his gun.

And so it came to pass.

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Plucky Rockall adventurer prepares to leave islet

ian 22
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What are those plaques in the piccy?

Commeration of The Vulture's occupation of the Rock? Does one say "Property of Her Brittanic Majesty"? Or perhaps "gid orf moi Rock"?

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In space no one can hear you scream, but Voyager 1 can hear A ROAR

ian 22
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Re: re: I still have my old Casio FX

I still have my Pickett log-log slide rule from the mid-1960s. Still works, although the lubricant needs replenishing.

They don't build'em like that anymore. In fact, they don't build'em at all!

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Snowden leaks latest: NSA, FBI g-men spied on Muslim-American chiefs

ian 22
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Re: Oh did you think there was some kind of "due process" involved.

Are you saying the Constitution is not a suicide pact?

I've heard that somewhere...

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Rockall batters plucky Brit adventurer

ian 22
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Re: "Now Hancock's been deprived of food, it's not clear is how long he can survive"

"Didn't a Mexican live on that diet for how long?"

And Japanese, apparently. With a bit of rice, he could have some lovely sushi to break the monotony.

Yes, give a man a fish and he'll eat for a day. Give him a fishing vessel and he'll be bankrupt in a month. Or similar...

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We got behind the wheel of a Tesla S electric car. We didn't hate it

ian 22
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@Anon

If you've the £100000 to purchase a Tesla S, I'd expect £12000 to replace the battery would not be a stretch.

Very likely you'd simply replace the car for another one at £100000 a go.

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Elon Musk: Just watch me – I'll put HUMAN BOOTS on Mars by 2026

ian 22
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Re: Off topic

@Mitoo Bobsworth

I agree, everything you say is true- to a point. Yes, electricity can easily become more expensive, but it is starting at a lower price than petrol, so for now it is the better choice.

Electricity generated by burning fossil fuels? Depends on your location. Recently, renewables provided Germany with 74% of its power. Granted it was temporary, but it points the way.

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ian 22
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Re: Off topic

Where does the 5-year datum come from? All electrocars I've read of guarantee the battery for 8 years. At the end of the battery's life there is still some value in it, so not a total loss.

A holistic accounting of any electric car must include the satisfaction in knowing the petroleum-pushers and their horrible tin pot dictator employees have taken a small kick in the cods. Not to mention the avoided costs from ever rising prices of petrol.

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Firefighters deliver trapped student from GIANT GERMAN LADYPARTS

ian 22
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Re: Must be my mind

He wanted to get his end off, but he chose the wrong end by the looks of things.

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Blame WWI, not Bin Laden, for NSA's post-9/11 intel suck

ian 22
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Re: Not only the US mate

Good Queen Bess (Elizabeth 1) had walsingham reading people's letters and torturing them a bit when more data were required.

Meh. Nothing to see here. Move along.

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NASA beams vid from space via laser

ian 22
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Windows

Traditional? Really?

When I read "10 minutes using traditional downlink methods", I realized I must be getting old. I'd not realized the Space Age was so far along that anything about it could be considered traditional.

It's "ye olde downlink method".

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Ukrainian teen created in lab passes Turing Test – famous nutty prof

ian 22
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Re: impossible

Highest order? We should try for excellence in all things!

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Marc Andreessen: Edward Snowden is a 'textbook traitor'

ian 22
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Quantum of betrayal?

Hmm! That sounds like it would be a great movie title!

Both a traitor and patriot, but only from your frame of reference one or the other.

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REVEALED: GCHQ's BEYOND TOP SECRET Middle Eastern INTERNET SPY BASE

ian 22
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Re: TRAITORS

But, but, but, we're the good'uns!

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US bloke raises $250k to build robo-masturbation device

ian 22
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Paris Hilton

Re: Down with this sort of thing

More ladies for the rest of us! More than you know want actual children.

Yeah even unto Paris.

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Google's driverless car: It'll just block our roads. It's the WORST

ian 22
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More vehicles? Horrors!

So expanding markets is a bad thing? If you are a libertarian, you must be a rather bad one.

In any case, the straw men you present (how platoons will interact, for example) are easily knocked down. Your concern that Granny will achieve some semblance of independence is touching, however I suspect you've never spoken with Granny and heard her frustration and resentment at having her mobility curtailed.

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Did NASA probe detect a KILLER GAMMA-RAY burst in Andromeda?

ian 22
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Coat

Off-axis means....

We'll not be pomme frits.

Mine's the one with the Nomex lining.

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ian 22
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Unhappy

Re: NASA have changed their mind

So no chance we'll be crisps tomorrow? So disappointing....

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Venus Express to get final acid bath before crashing to surface

ian 22
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Re: What is it with NASA?

I suspect you are mistaken, and that it is ESA destroying Venus Express.

</pedantic>

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Time-rich Brit boffin demos DIY crazytech WOLVERINE talons

ian 22
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Speaking of mum, didn't she ever tell him not to run with knives?

Although I wouldn't want to encounter him in a dark alley, well done!

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China 'in discussions' about high-speed rail lines to London, Germany – and the US

ian 22
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Re: All your station....

"Maybe the US rail industry will have learned ..."

Really? Spend much time at the casino do you?

In any case, the reference was to the Chinese labour that built the Western portion of the Yank's transcontinental railroad in the 19th century. The rest of it was built with Irish labour, and the less said about it the better.

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Whoa! NUDE! SELFIES! for! Marissa! Mayer's! Blink-gobbling! Yahoo!

ian 22
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For nude selfies, click here

What? Wait, where are the nude selfies? I didn't see any links!

This article is tosh.

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Russia to suspend US GPS stations in tit-for-tat spat

ian 22
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Re: Stop feeding the hawks!

Well said, smartypants. 'ave an upvote.

These ranticles have by now trotted out every shibboleth of the last 50 years, although Trevor's exclusive one-world club is creative. However, not one of the commentards has used ALL CAPS! Clearly they must try harder.

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Scientists warn of FOUR-FOOT sea level rise from GLACIER melt

ian 22
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Fire the doomsayers!

The scientists failed to predict this, so we should ignore anything they say.

I've been right before!

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