Feeds

* Posts by Allan George Dyer

1036 posts • joined 12 Jun 2009

Falling slinky displays slow-motion causality

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Re: Seems overcomplicated

So Wile E Coyote has a very low spring constant?

5
0

Cassini spots Titan ‘mini-Nile’

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

It has a "resemblance to the river Nile"? Sure, but if they turn the photo 90° clockwise, it's the spitting image of the Amazon.

0
0

Revealed: The Brit-built GRAVITY-powered light that costs $5

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge

Re: Nice

But the gravity version is more portable than the spring version. You don't have to carry the weight around, you fill up the bag with soil, gravel, shrapnel or whatever else is around when you use it. The two are both useful in different circumstances.

1
1

Worldwide Gmail crash was due to Google Sync bug

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Boffin

The choice is...

running round like a blue-arsed fly, fielding calls from your users and trying to get answers from your outsourcer about what happened and when it will be fixed

OR

running round like a blue-arsed fly, fielding calls from your users and trying to identify what died and fix it.

1
0

Another Apple maps desert death trap down under

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pirate

Re: All we need are some inbred cannibals living at down that road and we've got a B-movie!

What a coincidence, so am I. If you come to these coordinates, I'm sure you can make a contribution. The cast tells me they are looking forward to having you for dinner.

1
0

Linux kernel dumps 386 chip support

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

Re: 386?

You didn't start on the 4040, like me? To be fair, mine was a plastic DIP package, but the IO chip was ceramic.

I never tried running a *nix on it, and, IIRC, Linux never supported the 286 or earlier.

I only switched off my last 386SX in 2010, though that was running DOS.

0
0

Apple updates maps to remove Australia’s ghost-city in the desert

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Black Helicopters

Re: The Google DeLorean hits 88mph to visit Jamestown, NZ

It's a sad day... nothing but a marker on a featureless shore when I looked.

Does Google monitor the Reg. forum for urgent map updates?

0
0

US text-to-911 emergency SMS to go live by 2014

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: I'm sorry

No, I don't think the deceased need, or would use, 999 texts...

Or did you mean deaf?

0
0

GPU-stuffed monster cracks Windows passwords in minutes

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Do I detect a hint of hyperbole and sarcasm?

1
0

'Build us a Death Star, President Obama' demand thousands

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Mushroom

Re: $852,000,000,000,000,000

0.8 million years... that's a relief. Someone else can worry about the USA taking "friendly fire" to a whole new level.

8
0

US Army demos first robot Black Hawk helicopter

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Black Helicopters

New Reg unit?

So what is the life expectancy of a snowflake in a blast furnace?

And, as a civvie, I'd like clarification of why is 40 knots at low altitude on a battlefield so dangerous? Is it that fleshy pilots hit the hills, or because enemy squaddies complain that their target practice is too easy?

0
1

Einstein almost tagged dark energy in the early 1920s

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Thumb Up

Re: women

A true genius.

1
0

Who's using 'password' as a password? TOO MANY OF YOU

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

until you

post a picture of said car/bike/moped on FB. Or your brother does...

0
0

Forget fluorescents, plastic lighting strips coming out next year

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Boffin

hum from the fluorescent tubes?

So either the researcher hasn't noticed the electronic high-frequency ballasts (standard in T5 fluorescents) that have been available at retail for a decade or he's a bat. They're more efficient, and don't produce sound a human can hear.

The choice of fluorescent colour-temperatures available has increased as well. Complaints about 'light X' bothering people's eyes is very subjective. I suspect that some of it is due to poor installation design. A bright light at the edge of my field of view bothers me. I was in a theatre recently which had LED lights high above the stage, angled slightly towards the audience - very annoying.

Any research team announcing a radical new way of doing something will always compare it to the worst features of the old way, even when incremental improvements have eliminated them.

Yes, I'll take the shades.

9
0

Help-desk hell

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Bloody OS designers...

calling everything "Personal" this and "My" that! Giving the users some strange idea that they have control, that it's theirs!! Making every support conversation even more confusing, or terribly long-winded and confusing!!! I'm the BOFH and all these are mine, mine, MINE, I TELL YOU, MINE!!!!

</rant>

Sign... I feel a little better now.

1
0

Archaeologists uncover 'Unicorn's lair'

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Re: Wrong picture

Anakin, you beat me to it, the Qilin or Kirin only slightly resembles the western unicorn. But you could have mentioned the most likely place for this crowd to find one - on a bottle of beer:

http://www.thebeerstore.ca/sites/default/files/styles/blog_full/public/happenings/kirin_brewery.png

Yes, illiad, very like a deer or antelope, if flames crawling over the body are normal for those species.

0
0

Scientists build largest ever computerized brain

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

Can I borrow it?

For those, you know, baaaaad mornings.

1
0

Smear campaign

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Holmes

Re: Ah, dirty dishes...

The essential first step of every recipe in student digs is to locate precisely the utensils you require in the pile of dirty stuff, and wash ONLY THEM. At the end of the meal, the kitchen has been returned to the base state, and, most importantly, you haven't done an unfair amount os washing up.

3
0

Register readers mostly too ashamed to cop to hideous hoard horrors

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

I don't have an overwhelming urge to accumulate junk...

It accumulates quite effortlessly.

Anyone need a drawer-full of mice, trackballs and other pointing devices? Almost all nearly working?

What I don't understand is where all the power strips go. I've bought enough to circle the globe, but can never find one when I need it.

6
0

Boffin claims Bigfoot DNA reveals BESTIAL BONKING

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Holmes

Interspecies sterility

Interspecies hybrids are generally sterile (that's pretty much the definition of a species), so either the hybrids are incredibly long-lived, or hybridisation events are continuing (to put it politely)!

1
0

Where were the bullet holes on OS/2's corpse? Its head ... or foot?

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Linux

Re: uhm...

The pre-emptive multitasking encouraged me to choose OS/2 Warp over Win95. The ability to open a DOS box and make a new connection to your Novell server was also very handy when an admin task [i.e. user needs a password reset] cropped up while you had lots of stuff open.

Eventually moved to NT4 when the ability to read incoming Office documents and handle Chinese forced the move.

2
0

LAST EVER British typewriter manufactured in Wales

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: and no more secure then than today

Fabric ribbons didn't take a clear imprint, and were reused. It was the film ribbons that were use-once and a problem. I never saw a pre-electronic film ribbon, so I doubt your (a). (b) still stands.

But, they were more secure than today: no internet connection! If you wanted to eavesdrop, you had to BE there... in the office pilfering the ribbon, or in the bins, separating the carbon paper from someone's lunch wrapper.

0
0

Chinese cloud firm offers 'love bonus' to amorous staff

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

In other news...

Chengdu cloud computing company goes bankrupt due to, "unexpectedly high staff bonuses and understaffing". The CFO said, "First it was stiff, then long. I would have noticed sooner, but I've been under a lot of pressure, handling personnel. Uh... that's stiff payments, long leave and personnel issues!".

Is that an employee handbook in your pocket or...

0
0

Boffins: Proto-humans had stone spears HALF a MILLION YEARS BC

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

Let's see...

Proto-humans used special crossbows to fire stone-tipped spears into dead springboks... why?

Great technological development, but doesn't seem like a useful result.

0
0

Habitable HEAVY GRAVITY WORLD found just 42 light-years away

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Go

Re: Prior art

The name was given by the human colonists, who knew something of their literary history.

0
0

Microsoft demos real-time English to Chinese translation

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: One word in 8?

Parsing might be easier, but recognising the words would be a different problem. Chinese is a tonal language, Mandarin uses four tones, Cantonese more. The same sound said in a different tone is a different word. There's a Mandarin tounge-twister, "Shea shea shea shea shea shea shea", said with the right tones, it means "Forty-four stone lions".

3
0

What made us human? Being ARMED with lethal ranged weapons

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Basketweaving!

Obviously a lot more important than a few pointy things. You can collect more food, store and share it when you get back to your camp. Unfortunately, the evidence disappears quickly, so we tend to think about the aggressive Stone Age, not the Basketweaving age.

Also leads to the making of clay pots, storing liquids and... see the icon!

2
0
Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Joke

Re: Weapon of War???

Are you talking about the ancient spears, or the guns and US constitution?

0
0

Apple removes apology-hiding JavaScript from UK website

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

Re: Nuke them

The judge should convict them of contempt of court, fine them whatever they would pay their web designers for the duration the apology should appear, and have the Clerk of the court do the web design for that period. "If you won't do it properly, we-ll do it!"

That's not a coat, it's the scales of justice.

10
1

HP warns consumers: Don't downgrade Win8 PCs to Win7

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

Re: I think the following link is relevant here

OK, but I found this one funnier http://www.dilbert.com/2012-11-08/

And it might be more relevant.

OK, I'll get my coat, but I don't want the free sample.

0
0

Classic game 'Elite' returns … on Kickstarter

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Paris Hilton

Re: It is our duty to donate :-)

There's a word for someone who insists on using the wrong tool for the job. It only begins with E when said with a fake Mexican accent.

0
0
Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

Re: It is our duty to donate :-)

Spacestation docking is easy with non-self-centring analog joystick, but remember to hum the Blue Danube.

1
0

Ohio voting machines have 'backdoor', lawsuit claims

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

A slight logical flaw...

The major criticism of these electronic voting machines is that they do not provide a proper audit trail that would reveal voting anomalies. So how is, "a history of thousands of anomaly-free elections" any evidence against the criticism? It is exactly the result you would expect if the criticism was true.

3
0

New trend: Trojan which steals your pics instead of your text

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

back to the real world...

Although the "trojan-stole-my-porn-collection" scenarios are amusing, have you thought about how many business documents are stored as images? With images of a company letterhead, director's signature and a fax-modem (why do people still use fax?), you could do some quite lucrative fraud. Or merely search the images for company "secrets".

OK, I'll get my coat. A final thought, who's stupid enough to write a trojan to steal porn when there's an internet full of free stuff?

0
0

Bond fans: Test your 007 trivia, now!

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

I found the quiz really hard...

I couldn't get past the first question. Then I turned NoScript off.

0
0

UK's Intellectual Property Obliteration office attacked by Parliament

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Trollface

"one country"?

That would be one country with initials an anagram of S A U?

0
0

Hong Kong's lucky mobile number hawkers revealed

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge

Re: Chinese superstitions

And in HK there are plenty of examples of block or floor 13a, to avoid the unlucky 14.

Can we set up a profitable international trade? You send over the 13th floors, we'll ship back the 14th floors?

The exact translation of gweilo changes according to the translator, how much they think you know, and whether they think you will be offended.

0
0

'Hypersensitive' Wi-Fi hater loses case against fiendish DEVICES

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Facepalm

Re: Inquiring minds...

Did Faraday make budgie cages?

(Don't downvote, AndrueC, I didn't mention the t-word)

0
0

Water, water everywhere on the Moon: But not a drop to drink

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Which Hydroxy?

If it's ethyl, book me on the next rocket!

0
0

Register SPB hacks mull chopping off feet

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Coat

Cubits!

They were good enough for the Bible.

(Sorry, just wandered over from the Paul Broun article)

0
0
Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Headmaster

Re: MPG?

So, when your car fuel efficiency suddenly falls, do you:

a) take it to be repaired

b) blame your government for increasing fuel tax

c) blame the European government

d) blame OPEC

e) get out and walk?

1
0

Deep-sea worm recalls Star Wars favourite

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Devil

Job Application

As an atheist, I'd like to apply to be a Bishop in the Liberty Baptist Church. Hey, I'm as qualified as Paul Broun is to sit on a Science committee!

4
0

Motörheadphönes ears-in review

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pirate

Re: What

It's the Metal Umlaut. Where have you been? See:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metal_umlaut

3
0

Experts troll 'biggest security mag in the world' with DICKish submission

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
FAIL

Re: Flesch Readability Score

You probably shouldn't include the code sections and references when using a formula meant for English sentences.

0
0

NZ bloke gets eel stuck up jacksie

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Devil

And nobody has mentioned...

the candiru!

0
0

Scottish islanders' wave power hopes sunk by 'massive costs'

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Holmes

Why not...

Relocate London to Orkney? You get masses of power on cold, stormy nights, just when you need it.

1
0

Virus lab blogger collared by blundering copyright cop bot

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Pint

Re: Malware copyright?

Malware is copyright, fine. So, the infringer has to pay the commercial value as compensation, right?

But what is the value of malware? Surely, it's NEGATIVE - it harms the legitimate users (normally called "victims") and the author would be legally liable for the damage caused.

So, get the identity of the author, admit the copyright infringement and take all their money by "paying" the negative compensation!

Warning: I am not a lawyer, this argument probably works best when the judge is drunk.

1
0

New broadband minister snubs 'ugly' fibre cabinet gripes

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
Paris Hilton

Re: Pictures?

Ah! The picture explains it. They had to stop using the analogue design because of the rounded corner patent.

5
2

ENCODE’s ‘junk DNA’ claims spark biological bunfight

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge

Re: Junked junk DNA junks ID junking?

"negative impact on the progress of science" - No! Because real scientists have never assumed the junk DNA is junk. If they had, then the Human Genome Project would have been a lot smaller - just sequence the exons. Junk DNA was always a bit of a problem for molecular biologists to explain, why would a highly-evolved organism carry around so much rubbish, so it was studied and there are competing theories.

<joke>I know! The junk is actually the Designer's source code comments, which proves the Designer wants us to re-engineer ourselves just as soon as we've learnt to read them!</joke>

7
0

Sun daddy: 'Machines will replace 80 per cent of doctors'

Allan George Dyer
Bronze badge
FAIL

Observation...

If you start with a list of signs and symptoms, then dropping them into an expert system and getting a reasonable diagnosis is almost easy compared to starting with a patient, and compiling that list (including the ones the patient is embarrassed about).

2
0