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* Posts by Allan George Dyer

1015 posts • joined 12 Jun 2009

LAST EVER British typewriter manufactured in Wales

Allan George Dyer
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Headmaster

Re: and no more secure then than today

Fabric ribbons didn't take a clear imprint, and were reused. It was the film ribbons that were use-once and a problem. I never saw a pre-electronic film ribbon, so I doubt your (a). (b) still stands.

But, they were more secure than today: no internet connection! If you wanted to eavesdrop, you had to BE there... in the office pilfering the ribbon, or in the bins, separating the carbon paper from someone's lunch wrapper.

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Chinese cloud firm offers 'love bonus' to amorous staff

Allan George Dyer
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In other news...

Chengdu cloud computing company goes bankrupt due to, "unexpectedly high staff bonuses and understaffing". The CFO said, "First it was stiff, then long. I would have noticed sooner, but I've been under a lot of pressure, handling personnel. Uh... that's stiff payments, long leave and personnel issues!".

Is that an employee handbook in your pocket or...

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Boffins: Proto-humans had stone spears HALF a MILLION YEARS BC

Allan George Dyer
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Facepalm

Let's see...

Proto-humans used special crossbows to fire stone-tipped spears into dead springboks... why?

Great technological development, but doesn't seem like a useful result.

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Habitable HEAVY GRAVITY WORLD found just 42 light-years away

Allan George Dyer
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Go

Re: Prior art

The name was given by the human colonists, who knew something of their literary history.

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Microsoft demos real-time English to Chinese translation

Allan George Dyer
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Headmaster

Re: One word in 8?

Parsing might be easier, but recognising the words would be a different problem. Chinese is a tonal language, Mandarin uses four tones, Cantonese more. The same sound said in a different tone is a different word. There's a Mandarin tounge-twister, "Shea shea shea shea shea shea shea", said with the right tones, it means "Forty-four stone lions".

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What made us human? Being ARMED with lethal ranged weapons

Allan George Dyer
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Pint

Basketweaving!

Obviously a lot more important than a few pointy things. You can collect more food, store and share it when you get back to your camp. Unfortunately, the evidence disappears quickly, so we tend to think about the aggressive Stone Age, not the Basketweaving age.

Also leads to the making of clay pots, storing liquids and... see the icon!

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Allan George Dyer
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Joke

Re: Weapon of War???

Are you talking about the ancient spears, or the guns and US constitution?

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Apple removes apology-hiding JavaScript from UK website

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Nuke them

The judge should convict them of contempt of court, fine them whatever they would pay their web designers for the duration the apology should appear, and have the Clerk of the court do the web design for that period. "If you won't do it properly, we-ll do it!"

That's not a coat, it's the scales of justice.

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HP warns consumers: Don't downgrade Win8 PCs to Win7

Allan George Dyer
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Re: I think the following link is relevant here

OK, but I found this one funnier http://www.dilbert.com/2012-11-08/

And it might be more relevant.

OK, I'll get my coat, but I don't want the free sample.

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Classic game 'Elite' returns … on Kickstarter

Allan George Dyer
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Paris Hilton

Re: It is our duty to donate :-)

There's a word for someone who insists on using the wrong tool for the job. It only begins with E when said with a fake Mexican accent.

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Allan George Dyer
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Re: It is our duty to donate :-)

Spacestation docking is easy with non-self-centring analog joystick, but remember to hum the Blue Danube.

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Ohio voting machines have 'backdoor', lawsuit claims

Allan George Dyer
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Facepalm

A slight logical flaw...

The major criticism of these electronic voting machines is that they do not provide a proper audit trail that would reveal voting anomalies. So how is, "a history of thousands of anomaly-free elections" any evidence against the criticism? It is exactly the result you would expect if the criticism was true.

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New trend: Trojan which steals your pics instead of your text

Allan George Dyer
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back to the real world...

Although the "trojan-stole-my-porn-collection" scenarios are amusing, have you thought about how many business documents are stored as images? With images of a company letterhead, director's signature and a fax-modem (why do people still use fax?), you could do some quite lucrative fraud. Or merely search the images for company "secrets".

OK, I'll get my coat. A final thought, who's stupid enough to write a trojan to steal porn when there's an internet full of free stuff?

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Bond fans: Test your 007 trivia, now!

Allan George Dyer
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Facepalm

I found the quiz really hard...

I couldn't get past the first question. Then I turned NoScript off.

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UK's Intellectual Property Obliteration office attacked by Parliament

Allan George Dyer
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Trollface

"one country"?

That would be one country with initials an anagram of S A U?

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Hong Kong's lucky mobile number hawkers revealed

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Chinese superstitions

And in HK there are plenty of examples of block or floor 13a, to avoid the unlucky 14.

Can we set up a profitable international trade? You send over the 13th floors, we'll ship back the 14th floors?

The exact translation of gweilo changes according to the translator, how much they think you know, and whether they think you will be offended.

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'Hypersensitive' Wi-Fi hater loses case against fiendish DEVICES

Allan George Dyer
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Facepalm

Re: Inquiring minds...

Did Faraday make budgie cages?

(Don't downvote, AndrueC, I didn't mention the t-word)

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Water, water everywhere on the Moon: But not a drop to drink

Allan George Dyer
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Pint

Which Hydroxy?

If it's ethyl, book me on the next rocket!

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Register SPB hacks mull chopping off feet

Allan George Dyer
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Coat

Cubits!

They were good enough for the Bible.

(Sorry, just wandered over from the Paul Broun article)

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Allan George Dyer
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Headmaster

Re: MPG?

So, when your car fuel efficiency suddenly falls, do you:

a) take it to be repaired

b) blame your government for increasing fuel tax

c) blame the European government

d) blame OPEC

e) get out and walk?

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Deep-sea worm recalls Star Wars favourite

Allan George Dyer
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Devil

Job Application

As an atheist, I'd like to apply to be a Bishop in the Liberty Baptist Church. Hey, I'm as qualified as Paul Broun is to sit on a Science committee!

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Motörheadphönes ears-in review

Allan George Dyer
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Pirate

Re: What

It's the Metal Umlaut. Where have you been? See:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metal_umlaut

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Experts troll 'biggest security mag in the world' with DICKish submission

Allan George Dyer
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FAIL

Re: Flesch Readability Score

You probably shouldn't include the code sections and references when using a formula meant for English sentences.

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NZ bloke gets eel stuck up jacksie

Allan George Dyer
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Devil

And nobody has mentioned...

the candiru!

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Scottish islanders' wave power hopes sunk by 'massive costs'

Allan George Dyer
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Holmes

Why not...

Relocate London to Orkney? You get masses of power on cold, stormy nights, just when you need it.

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Virus lab blogger collared by blundering copyright cop bot

Allan George Dyer
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Pint

Re: Malware copyright?

Malware is copyright, fine. So, the infringer has to pay the commercial value as compensation, right?

But what is the value of malware? Surely, it's NEGATIVE - it harms the legitimate users (normally called "victims") and the author would be legally liable for the damage caused.

So, get the identity of the author, admit the copyright infringement and take all their money by "paying" the negative compensation!

Warning: I am not a lawyer, this argument probably works best when the judge is drunk.

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New broadband minister snubs 'ugly' fibre cabinet gripes

Allan George Dyer
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Paris Hilton

Re: Pictures?

Ah! The picture explains it. They had to stop using the analogue design because of the rounded corner patent.

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ENCODE’s ‘junk DNA’ claims spark biological bunfight

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Junked junk DNA junks ID junking?

"negative impact on the progress of science" - No! Because real scientists have never assumed the junk DNA is junk. If they had, then the Human Genome Project would have been a lot smaller - just sequence the exons. Junk DNA was always a bit of a problem for molecular biologists to explain, why would a highly-evolved organism carry around so much rubbish, so it was studied and there are competing theories.

<joke>I know! The junk is actually the Designer's source code comments, which proves the Designer wants us to re-engineer ourselves just as soon as we've learnt to read them!</joke>

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Sun daddy: 'Machines will replace 80 per cent of doctors'

Allan George Dyer
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FAIL

Observation...

If you start with a list of signs and symptoms, then dropping them into an expert system and getting a reasonable diagnosis is almost easy compared to starting with a patient, and compiling that list (including the ones the patient is embarrassed about).

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China mutates plants ... IN SPAAAAAACE

Allan George Dyer
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Much cheaper...

Just put the seeds a carefully-measured distance from a reactor core.

Or, if the safety checks aren't enforced, from the cooling water outlet.

The lead-lined one, please.

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BYOD turns sysadmins into heroes

Allan George Dyer
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Re: I once had to bring my own device....

"Other devices might be a decent screen, keyboard or mouse, but you hardly need worry about those."

What, even the ones with the built-in keylogger, network sniffer and transmitter?

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Windows Azure adds code-free data services for mobile apps

Allan George Dyer
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Paris Hilton

Coincidentally...

Microsoft has been explaining how Windows Azure did NOT cause the total collapse of the Miss Hong Kong online and mobile voting system last Sunday:

http://articles.yuikee.com.hk/newsletter/2012/08/b.html

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Mr Bank Manager, help yourself to my smartphone contents

Allan George Dyer
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Paris Hilton

Hmmpf, I'm annoyed that there are two people who are not only equally pedantic, but faster.

Alistair, turn left and you might find the land of slightly-damp disc drives and other exotic places.

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Going viral 9,500 years ago: 'English descended from ancient Turkey'

Allan George Dyer
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Trollface

Re: Not quite

cow, sheep, swine, table, coffer, arm breast, hand finger

Oh, sorry you wanted French words. If you're going to claim "mostly derived from French" I think you have to try both ways. Germanic-derived words are probably far more common in everyday speech, especially the swearwords.

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Allan George Dyer
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Coat

days of week Re: Dubiety...

Good thing the medievals named the days before the rest were discovered... the week would be three days longer (and you can guess how long the weekend would be), and we'd be in the middle of an extended argument about cutting a day, since Pluto had been demoted.

Yes, that is an anachronisticly powerful telescope in my pocket.

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Reagan slams webmail providers for liberal bias

Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

But what if...

a Democrat politician told people to stop buying gas because the power companies donate to the Republicans?

I'm continually bemused the American politicians. Just when I think one of them has said something so completely insane that nothing out top it, another one does.

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McAfee puts Barnaby Jack on car-jacking hackers' case

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Fixed.

So, Graham Bartlett, why is the automotive engineering industry more likely to think about security than, for example, the ones who made rlogin, rsh and rcp transmit passwords in the clear, or the ones who made Macro Viruses viable by including auto-execute macros, or the ones who decided it would be a really cool idea to have your OS autorun stuff from any junk media you plug in, or the Siemens SCADA engineers who not only designed equipment with well-known default passwords, but made software that failed if you changed them?

I guess these must be different engineers, working for companies that value security highly. Good thing Siemens isn't building automotive systems... oh, wait!

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Disney sitcom says open source is insecure

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Well

Dieppe also led to the development of Hobart's Funnies, tanks modified for beach landings:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hobart%27s_Funnies

http://www.imaco.com.hk/cgi-bin/prod.pl/keyword/Hobart

which were successfully used on the non-USA Normandy beaches - perhaps a "not invented here" attitude.

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Assange calls for help from … Quakers?

Allan George Dyer
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Headmaster

Re: Renouncing Witch-Hunts

JimC, a useful dictionary entry for your education:

witch-hunt n 2: the searching out and deliberate harassment of those (as political opponents) with unpopular views

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Allan George Dyer
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Renouncing Witch-Hunts

But I thought Witch-Hunts were one of the traditional core-values of the USA, as seen in Salem and McCarthy.

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Hong Kong plods turn RoboCop with strap-on vid cams

Allan George Dyer
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Coat

A few corrections...

I have to agree that the Police here in HK are polite and generally effective. They probably racially profile, in 19 years I've never been stopped on the street and asked for ID.

However, there is an IPCC, but they merely review cases after an internal Police investigation. The ICAC (Independent Commission Against Corruption) deals, like the label says, with corruption - anywhere in HK, and they are well known for pursuing anyone.

The video is of the Amina Bokhary incident, the woman is well-connected and the niece of a Judge and has assaulted Police officers on previous occasions http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amina_Bokhary_controversy

Perhaps the Police should take acting courses, if that is what it takes to remind the privileged classes that they are subject to the same laws as the rest of us.

Yes, my ID card is in my pocket.

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High tech toilets receive big prizes from Bill Gates

Allan George Dyer
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FAIL

Don't forget the additional steps...

3. heavy rainfall causes flooding, overflow of latrine pit, contamination of drinking water supply

4. Cholera outbreak keeps latrine pit overflowing

Repeat step 4 until the population dies.

You also need enough land to dig the pits in. Your average shanty town hovel does not have a large backyard.

Millions of people are living in desperately overcrowded conditions, and your solution is tried, tested, and failed.

OTOH, I'm not sure turning toilets into an investment opportunity so the rich can extract more pennies from the poor will have an outstanding effect on the problem.

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Deadly pussies kill more often than owners think

Allan George Dyer
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Pint

Re: Biggest thing my cat ever brought in...?

Watching it drag an ostrich through the cat-flap was amusing, but we decided to get rid of it when it brought down the bull elephant.

Get the next round in, and I'll tell you about our croc...

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Curiosity needs OS upgrade before getting down to science

Allan George Dyer
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Joke

Riskiest Moment Not the Landing...

That is when the vendor website fails to validate the software license and refuses to deliver the critical security updates because of the bogus mailing address.

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Anonymous hunts down Voldemort for hacking hungry kids' charity

Allan George Dyer
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Maths while ranting... Re: "deciding who gets to be anonymous" @Matt bryant

Come on, downvoting a Mea Culpa?

Matt Bryant, you sound rather full of yourself, flaunting your own independence and ignoring all the probable and possible reasons for a 35 yr old still living with their parents, but I was very taken with the image of a ragged Dickensian workhouse Matt, aged 10, eking out a meagre existence.

Icon - you didn't work for a guy called Fagin by any chance?

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Microsoft dumps Metro from Windows 8

Allan George Dyer
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Alert

Re: In my opinion

I initially read Elbee as Ebola.

Hey, that's got a nice ring to it:

Windows Ebola - Giving Killer App a New Meaning!

(Hmph, no biohaz icon)

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Allan George Dyer
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Re: So: Windows Marina then.

But Leyland's buses were (are, they are some still refusing to die) quite good, so how about:

Windows Routemaster

(and wasn't the P76 a WWII fighter plane?)

The one with the return ticket. ding ding!

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Hobbyist builds working assault rifle using 3D printer

Allan George Dyer
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Re: 6,000 rounds is not the question

The body armour killed no-one. If you're going to allow that many weapons in a country, then perhaps innocent citizens should be wearing body armour routinely.

I'll take the kevlar one.

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BOFH: Shove your project managementry up your mailbox!

Allan George Dyer
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If you need to think outside of the box, doesn't that mean you over-compartmentalised the specification?

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CO2 warms Earth FASTER than previously thought

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Relax...@ Big Yin

Sure, no worries, my building is less than 50m from the waterfront, at the bottom of a steep slope... apparently a 13m rise would leave it dry. I think the low resolution of their data might lead to misleading results.

Anyway, on the 23rd floor, I'll be way above it.

(note to self:

1. Check foundation resistance to erosion

2. Check slope landslip risk

3. Buy a dinghy )

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