* Posts by Allan George Dyer

1176 posts • joined 12 Jun 2009

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Ford to save you from BIKE FITNESS HORROR

Allan George Dyer
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"fold into a Transit van"

Wow! Elite ninja origami skills, but shouldn't that be unfolds?

"with the wheels removed"

Uh, OK, still elite ninja origami skills, but zero practicality.

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NASA 'nauts complete another EPIC SPACEWALK to route cables around ISS

Allan George Dyer
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Good job

I grumble when I have to crawl under a desk to replace a cable...

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Microsoft man: Internet Explorer had to go because it's garbage

Allan George Dyer
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Facepalm

Can of worms...

OK, so they are throwing out the old buggy code and writing some new buggy code, good.

But they aren't actually throwing Trident out, so they still have to maintain it.

The next question is, are they:

i) Incuding Trident as standard and activating it automatically when a broken IE-specific site is encountered. -> The detection code is unlikely to ever work properly, and will usually cause subtle and non-repeatable failures.

ii) Make Trident an option -> Microsoft gets a new revenue stream, IT managers get a headache of deciding whether to use it, and how to tell users when they should switch, if they do.

Final question, are they insane?

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Why does the NSA's boss care so much about backdoors when he can just steal all our encryption keys?

Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

"backdoor," sounds "kind of shady"?

Some more accurate alternatives:

"gaping security hole"

"thoughtpolice access node"

"tyranny enabler"

Shady is far too light a colour for this.

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Google offers 'INFINITY MILLION DOLLARS' for bugs in Chrome

Allan George Dyer
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Headmaster

Google admits there are INFINITY MILLION bugs in Chrome!

Remember, $∞ million / $50,000 = ∞ million

Their next conference venue is the Hilbert Hotel.

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Didn't the Left once want the WORKERS to get all the dosh?

Allan George Dyer
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Paris Hilton

Market Restrictions...

So Worstall looks at the data for racism in football, and concludes that "markets beat racism"? But football isn't a free market - the number of jobs is highly restricted, the employer can't decide to replace the 11 "Premier League" players with 22 players who each cost half the price. The number of slots in the Premier League is restricted too. So, it seems highly dubious to reach a general conclusion based on something that is so far from the normal situation.

I'll admit to not understanding the value proposition for fans, too... At first sight, fans are buying 90 minutes of entertainment, but is the entertainment value of a match between two Premier League teams so much higher than the lower leagues with lower ticket prices, or even an amateur match? Are the fans, in fact, buying the feeling of being a member of a group of 50,000 like-minded people?

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Chinese food safety officials drank so much during working lunch that one of them DIED

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Party etiquette

@dan1980 - wait untill you've tasted the stuff before deciding, it can be described as an "acquired taste" or "regional delicacy".

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You'll NEVER guess who has bought I Taught Taylor Swift How To Give Head dot-com

Allan George Dyer
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Joke

Sponsored article?

How much did ElReg accept from the Domain Name Registrars for this article?

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Kanye West: Yo, DNS... Imma let you finish, but this gTLD is one of the best of all time

Allan George Dyer
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Devil

Re: I don't follow

I'm going to be VERY annoyed if I get there 9 milliseconds early!

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Patch now: Design flaw in Windows security allows hackers to own corporate laptops, PCs

Allan George Dyer
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The nice thing about OSs is that everyone gets a share of the schadenfreude.

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They've finally solved it: Schrödinger's cat is both ALIVE AND DEAD

Allan George Dyer
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Re: If you really want to know ...

@Mike Bell: I would hesitate to describe an explanation that invokes "vast numbers of 'universes'" as in any way parsimonious.

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Allan George Dyer
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Quis custodiet ipsos felis?

Is the cat an observer?

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TOTAL DARKNESS lasted 550 MILLION years until the first STARS LIT UP

Allan George Dyer
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Coat

Re: It's all wrong anyway

"I've never really understood why that was worded as an 'either/or' thing…"

Yeah, should be "with".

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Google gets my data, I get search and email and that. Help help, I'm being REPRESSED!

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Not so fast

So, Indolent Wretch, you are happy with the way Facebook and Google use your data, many other people (also with technical knowledge) are not. It is fair to say there is a range of sensitivity to this among the technical community, and each person makes their own decisions based on their sensitivity and the perceived risk. The non-technical majority are denied that choice by their ignorance, and they probably have just the same range of sensitivity as us. The data-slurping companies are exploiting that ignorance, and asymmetric information is acknowledged as detrimental to efficient markets.

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BYOD is NOT the Next Biggest Thing™: Bring me Ye Olde Lappetoppe

Allan George Dyer
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"secure" WiFi, "greynet"? Re: It depends.

Keep it simple: 1) Mandate VPN connections for all External access; 2) Define WiFi as External.

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How's this for customer service: Comcast calls bloke an A**HOLE – and even puts it in print

Allan George Dyer
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magical phrase, "Please transfer this call to your supervisor"

Doesn't work around here, apparently all the call centres have no supervisor present, and they are not contactable, at all, in any way. I no longer know what "supervisor" means.

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UK Scouts database 'flaws' raise concerns

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Dib dib dib

I joined cubs in 1971, and it wasn't used then.

I think it went out with Wolf Cubs, and the old-style salute (two fingers on each hand in a V, held to the sides of the head - wolf ears, right. I wonder why they dropped that one…)

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Great Firewall of China blasts DDoS attacks at random IP addresses

Allan George Dyer
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Joke

Re: Simple Solution

3-for-1 win, Apple won't be able to contact their factories = no more iPhones.

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Dot-com is dead. Long live dot-com

Allan George Dyer
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"internationalized domain names"

One thing I wonder about proponents of internationalized domain names is, why do they never mention the downside? OK, registering, 銳記.公司.香港 makes it easy for a Chinese-literate person to recognise and enter the address, but, if you want to reach an international market, the URLs in your marketing material are going to say xn--3jst58k.xn--55qx5d.xn--j6w193g which could limit the effectiveness of the campaign.

The Hong Kong Registry quietly recognises this by bundling a free .香港 with a .hk (or vice-versa, if you want to look at it that way).

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Notorious skin-flick master Max Hardcore goes limp over namesake dot-com

Allan George Dyer
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Holmes

Why didn't they...

re-use it for e-tendering on public building foundations?

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Microsoft wants LAMP for wireless mobe charger

Allan George Dyer
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Terminator

Re: Do I smell bbq?

The next version has additional hardware to deal with this problem - an AK47.

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Just WHY is the FBI so sure North Korea hacked Sony? NSA: *BLUSH*

Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

How to Look like a world-class cyber-spy agency

1. Wait for an attack

2. Match list of proxies used in the attack to list of "enemy" nations, declare the attacker was "sloppy" in using their own addresses

3. Declare you already compromised enemy's systems years ago

3. Laugh evilly as enemy mounts extensive investigation for non-existent breach, and eventually executes their top cyber-security team for treason or incompetence.

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Latest menace to internet economy: Gators EATING all the PUSSIES

Allan George Dyer
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Joke

"alligator had been living illegally in the home since the 1970s"

"Mr. Alligator, I'm here to serve this eviction order."

"It'll cost you an arm and a leg to get me out of here!"

"Umm… I'll bring a lawyer."

And the lawyer has not been seen since…

<pedant mode> Surely keeping the alligator there was the offence; the alligator is not a person that can be prosecuted.

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Nice SECURITY, 'Lizard Squad'. Your DDoS-for-hire service LEAKS

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Teenage kicks

Yes. Apparently most people will answer simple questions, like, say, "What's your password?", honestly when half-asleep.

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Boffins: It's EASY to make you GRASS YOURSELF UP for crimes you never did

Allan George Dyer
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"I remember there was a study a few years ago where they planted false memories in children. "

Are you SURE you remember?

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Get coding or you'll bounce email from new dot-thing domains

Allan George Dyer
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FAIL

Re: It'll suck to be a help desk resource...

@Tom 13 - What makes you think that a one non-latin keyboard can be used to enter a different non-latin script?

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Allan George Dyer
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Re: This is not the Badger

China? If they are not already your suppliers, they're going to be your customers.

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DANGER: Is that 'hot babe' on Skype a sextortionist?

Allan George Dyer
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Coat

North Yorkshire has a lot of catching up to do...

Hong Kong's crime report for 2013 revealed "Sextortion" cases rose sevenfold from 60 to 477 cases. 2014 report out later this month.

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UNDER A VEST: Man cuffed for smuggling 94 iPhones strapped to his body

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Metaldetector

@veti - No metal detector last time I crossed.

Why wait a month - some people, including school kids, commute even day. Take one a day, and claim it's your personal phone - who can say different? Recruit a class-full of kids, and you have a cushy business model.

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What do UK and Iran have in common? Both want to outlaw encrypted apps

Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

Re: Die Gedanke sind frei…

third option: they don't want to draw attention to the deal they have with Google for people's search history, that effectively allows them access to 90% of minds 90% of the time.

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Hang on a second – Time Lords have added one to 2015

Allan George Dyer
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Go

@Symon you're saying that we should bring the Moon back closer to speed up the Earth? I can bring some string and elastic bands to the project...

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Mock choc shock: 3D candy printer is good news for sweet-toothed swingbellies

Allan George Dyer
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Re: "A pint of goat urine would be more pleasant to consume"

Have you ever been to a Budweiser factory?

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Hey look! Microsoft's workforce isn't all white men

Allan George Dyer
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Re: So?

With perfect equal opportunities, the mix would be the same as the mix of eligible applicants. The fact that one group dominates at the higher levels suggests that other groups are loosing out on promotions. The next question is why? - which is difficult for a subjective judgement of suitability for a job.

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Cops think Mt Gox meltdown was an 'INSIDE JOB' – report

Allan George Dyer
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Re: "how the exchange was run"

Although it is the most spectacular (so far), there are millions of ways to run a web business badly.

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Ghosts of Christmas Past: The long-ago geek gifts that made us what we are

Allan George Dyer
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There were possibilities...

I did manage to convert the Mamod static engine to mobile, with meccano wheels, clutch and gearbox, with rack-and-pinion steering. It moved, oh so slowly.

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Sony releases Nork flick The Interview straight to DVD (digital video download)

Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

OK, thanks. That explains a lot.

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Allan George Dyer
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Black Helicopters

Anyone think that the hack was backed by the CIA, to create patriotic fervour, and any American not doing their duty and watching the film will shortly be visiting Guantanamo Bay?

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Independent inquiry into British air-traffic-control IT nightmare

Allan George Dyer
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Re: If it works, don't fix it.

@BearishTendancies - thanks for the link, it's quite mind-boggling:

"GDS is not just trying to make government services online as easy as shopping at Amazon"

So we can look forwards to a third-party software glitch to set all our tax bills to 1p?

What's the air-traffic control equivalent of setting prices to 1p - altitude to 1 foot perhaps?

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Senator: Backdoor for the Feds is a backdoor for hackers

Allan George Dyer
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That most rare of species...

an intelligent, informed politician.

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Chum's house burnt down? Facebook mulls 'DISLIKE' button for that

Allan George Dyer
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I'm split between, "Why didn't they think about this years ago?", and "Perhaps Zuck can make a more mature decision now".

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So - you thought you knew all about the INSTANT COFFEE DUNES of TITAN?

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Lakes of methanol and ethanol

@Martin Gregorie - propane and butane are intoxicative inhalants. I'm not sure if methane and ethane are too, and you'd have to be insane to book a package tour to Titan to find out. There again, methanol isn't really a tipple for the sane, either.

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Kaspersky: That 2 years we took to warn you about Regin ? We had GOOD REASON

Allan George Dyer
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Re: What else is out there?

Hundreds of thousands of unique samples a day. The numbers don't mean very much anymore. Lots are corrupt samples, or repackaged known malware. It's like trying to do paleontology by picking through the rubble after bulldozers have flattened the Natural History Museum.

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SCIENCE LAB TERROR: MYSTERY of the MISSING BRAINS

Allan George Dyer
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Trollface

Re: Don't loose your head

@Doctor Syntax - It would be surprising if it was, though I don't doubt it was tried. King's is nothing more than an annoyance to UCL. How's Reggie?

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Allan George Dyer
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Pirate

Don't loose your head

Jeremy's head was never on display, it was damaged in the embalming process and is kept in a wooden box, at one time at his feet. The visible head is a wax copy.

Whether Jeremy's head was ever stolen by King's is uncertain, the students tended to target the mascots, which, for UCL, was a Scottish Highlander figure taken from a tobacconist's shop on Tottenham Court Road.

I'm particularly fond of the story that Jeremy's head is still taken to Council meetings, where he is recorded as "present, but not voting".

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Boffins unearth the ultimate antique art - 500,000 years old

Allan George Dyer
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Re: Shark tooth huh.

'Calling it "art" is stretching things a bit though.'

Perhaps Unk did it while he waited for his elder sister to finish her detailed sand sculpture of a palm tree? We only find the stuff that survives.

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Device fingerprinting tech: It's not a cookie, but 'cookie' rules apply

Allan George Dyer
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Re: @Ole

@Ole Juul - I was making the point about HTML canvas fingerprinting specifically, which, if I understand correctly, depends on Javascript to work, therefore it fails when it is off. The downside, of course, is the loss of useful stuff that depends on Javascript.

Yes, my browser is unique among those the EFF site has tested, but if I turn off Javascript, then there are, apparently, three others that are indistinguishable in the ~4 million tested. Not really much of a gain.

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Allan George Dyer
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Re: @Ole

@Brewster's Angle Grinder

Turn off Javascript?

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Hominid ancestors beat humans to the drinks cabinet, say boffins

Allan George Dyer
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Windows

Depressing...

We're not descended from the graceful apes that swung through the trees, plucking the juiciest fruits, but their degenerate wino cousins, shuffling across the forest floor, rummaging in the piles of trash.

Need a drink to forget...

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Star Wars: Episode VII trailer lands. You call that a lightsaber? THIS is a lightsaber

Allan George Dyer
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A Light-Basket-Hilt

would look Really cool. Also great for punching you opponent in the face when you go corp-a-corps, but you have to be very careful picking it up, if you like having fingers.

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Holy sh*t! Amsterdam man in pop-up public toilet shock horror

Allan George Dyer
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Re: They play the opening bit of "Thus Spake Zarathustra" when they rise, right?

But a step forwards for public health and street fragrance. Though it wouldn't make much difference, as Hacney Carriage drivers were allowed to urinate at the offside rear wheel of their vehicles, and, anyway, everything was horse-drawn.

I also recall (from an antiques program, I think) that ladies had specially-designed pots they would use during long sermons at church.

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