* Posts by Mahatma Coat

1239 posts • joined 11 Jun 2009

Holden bakes Siri into Barinas

Mahatma Coat
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Devil

Siri...

...remind me again why I spent good money on a car with such twattish accessories.

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If Google got a haircut, a tie and a suit, would it be Microsoft?

Mahatma Coat
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Re: Google winning the browser wars - not as scary as the dark days of IE

If Chrome totally dominates, there can continue to be forks of their browser with any undesirable parts stripped out. Most people will use the official versions for convenience and geeks the unofficial versions cleansed of evil.

When Chrome was first released I gave it a test drive and was somewhat surprised to see that whenever I logged in to an SSL site Chrome also made an SSL connection to a Google-owned server. I then tried the supposedly flea-free version known as SWIron. It had the same behaviour despite claims that dodgy code had been removed. Neither got a second chance.

Firefox all the way here. It's the only one I feel I can trust.

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Animal Liberation drone surveillance plan draws fire

Mahatma Coat
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Good on 'em

The way Australian cattle farmers treat livestock is pretty despicable. Animals are moved on journeys that often exceed 1000km or more in crowded cattle trucks to a coastal port. They are then exported by ship to places such as Indonesia and the Middle East where they have their throats slashed while still alive by the usual Halal brutality

If the farmers had any concern for animal welfare (and breeding cattle for killing excludes them from that category) they would at least have local abattoirs and not subject the animals to weeks of poor travelling conditions before an unpleasant death. It's barbaric.

They may whine about privacy invasion by drone but I've never yet heard a farmer complain about Australia's proposed data retention and monitoring.

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Second International Cat Video Festival coming to Oakland CA

Mahatma Coat
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Devil

Civilisation has reached the tipping point

It's all downhill from here.

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Google Street View releases devastated Fukushima town tour

Mahatma Coat
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Re: Disaster pr0n for sickos

At least they weren't looting.

There wasn't much left to loot.

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Mahatma Coat
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Re: Disaster pr0n for sickos

fire up a stand to sell "disaster burgers"

Most people's stuff had been swept away by the storm surge or was under two metres of sand.

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Mahatma Coat
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Disaster pr0n for sickos

We had to get the police to roadblock our area to the public after cyclone Yasi. Too many rubberneckers drove in to look at the mess. Sick bastards.

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Experts agree: Your next car will be smarter than you

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"Your next car will be smarter than you"

The author should visit rural Australia. His statement is already true here.

<-- Beer icon. It lubricates the drivers.

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Movie, TV ads annoying? You ain't seen nothin' yet

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Re: No Thanks

If this gets too obvious I'll just stop watching anything.

I was thinking the same thing. I shall just read more books instead. Then I had a horrible thought about what would happen to books if we all stopped watching TV.

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Oi, Microsoft, where's my effin' toolbar gone?

Mahatma Coat
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The worst thing, by a mile...

...are those functions that remain invisible until you hover over them (yes, WordPress, I'm looking at you). How the f%$# are you supposed to know to hover if the f*&^ers are invisible?

The other UI nightmare is the one that came with Orifice 2000 (at least I think it was but it was definitely a MS product). Menu items that just disappeared if you didn't use them often. The obvious happened: As you couldn't then find them you used them even less.

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FinFisher spyware goes global, mobile and undercover

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Happy

"FinFisher spyware has been updated to evade detection"

and has now been discovered in 25 countries across the globe

Awesome detection evasion there. 10/10.

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Microsoft issues manual on Brits to Cambridge exports

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"fish and chips, a national treat"

Things must be desperate in Blighty if fish and chips are a treat.

Why did Microsoft even bother? Half the fun of moving to another country is exploring the differences.

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OpenSUSE 12.3 ships, project back on track

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Dead quick

I have 12.3 running in a VirtualBox VM on the Win7 gaming box. Everything feels faster than the equivalent apps on the base Windows system.

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Elon Musk's 'Grasshopper' hover rocket scores another test success

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Re: Strange URL

Pharma SEO fail?

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Six things a text editor must do - or it's a one-way trip to the trash

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Re: I'll stick with my Mac

Blimey, dozens of comments before we come to a Mac user that knows what a text editor is.

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Mahatma Coat
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Re: A nitpick

What is Zawinski's Observation?

I believe it's possibly the one about all applications bloating until they can do email. Or something.

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The supercomputers LIED: UK rainfall is rising, but won't drown our phones

Mahatma Coat
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Boffin

"jam jars with rulers stuck to the side"

And will likely remain so for a while. The main difference these days is that fewer people are required to read the rulers due to the ubiquity of modern connected rain gauges or AWS.

Rain gauges, even the spiffy modern ones, are notoriously inaccurate for several reasons.

NB I did once enquire about a BoM-recommended AWS for home use but was told anything below $25k was a waste of time. If you live in the town with the highest rainfall in Aus (over 7 metres) you tend to pay attention to this stuff..

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Farewell, Reg: This hack is hanging up her Apple jacket

Mahatma Coat
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Coat

Good luck

Your articles were always a pleasure to read.

I'll get your coat.

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Tesco: Every little (effort to kill Amazon, Spotify) helps

Mahatma Coat
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Devil

Life moves so fast...

...I can remember the old days when Tesco specialised in horse meat lasagne.

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Australian Bureau of Meteorology apps to map future rain

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It'll be insurance ads. Thank fuck for Adblock..

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Take that, freetards: First music sales uptick in over a decade

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Pirate

I buy more music now than I ever have

Not just music, but films and games too.

Just to clarify, none of this happened because of anything the music industry did to "stop piracy". The most likely reason is that I'm now exposed to more culture than at any time in the past. Not only that but I can choose where, when and what I am exposed to. This is despite the best efforts of the music industry to make the opposite true.

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Official: More than 7 million Brits have NEVER accessed the interwebs

Mahatma Coat
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"44 per cent of those people were over the age of 75."

Cameron's NHS policies will soon get that number down.

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Brit robot programmers banged up for £500,000 tax evasion

Mahatma Coat
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Re: Meanwhile...

Slight difference unfortunately

Yep, I realise there is a legal difference but the end result is the same. It's still ripping off those that do pay their fair share.

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Mahatma Coat
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Unhappy

Meanwhile...

...the likes of Amazon, Google and scummy bankers get away with squillions while HMRC are busy with two oiks.

Still, something must be done, eh? Got to keep the Daily Mail readers happy.

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Quit the 2D internet, flee your cave, and GET LAID, barks rock star

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He's quite right

The only thing you'll see in a high street in ten years* is a solitary pound shop with a tumbleweed blowing past.

Support your local shops. They have real jobs inside, real people with real knowledge of the products, not just some unskilled drones picking items from the racks in the latest mega warehouse.

*Possibly less.

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iPad? Pah. Behold the EYEPAD, patented by Sony for the 'PS4'

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"The device is called an EyePad not to primarily annoy Apple"

But it will help and that's surely a good thing.

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Obama says patent trolls 'extort money', pledges reform

Mahatma Coat
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Re: Patents are a wondrous thing...

Patents predate the Renaissance and the scientific revolution, and there is some evidence that a similar idea was present in ancient Greece.

Yes, a patent was granted in Greece for a year (according to Wikipedia). Given the speed of tech advances back then it would be equivalent to maybe a week today. I'd have no problems with that.

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Mahatma Coat
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Devil

Patents are a wondrous thing...

...because no one invented anything before patents existed.

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Apple design bloke Ive finally honoured properly - with Blue Peter badge

Mahatma Coat
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Perhaps he could make a copy...

...and send it to Dieter Rams. Seems only fair.

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BlackBerry booster Alicia Keys blames hacker for iPhone Twitter update

Mahatma Coat
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FAIL

"I've been hacked"

It's the "dog ate my homework" of the digital age.

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Intel's new TV box to point creepy spy camera at YOUR FACE

Mahatma Coat
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Devil

Eric Huggers

Eric bloody Huggers. He seems to lurch from one badly thought out tech nightmare to another.

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Love in the time of the internet: A personal memoir

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Happy

Re: You lost me at...

I have never been on a date where the lady brought along a friend.

I did once. Best date ever.

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Kiwi Coroner says Coca-Cola helped kill woman

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Not just Coke

Drink as little as six litres of plain old water in a few hours and you may die of water intoxication.

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Still-living, unincarcerated Ted Nugent invited to Barack Obama gig

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Nugent

What a complete arse. He calls himself a survivalist. It must be tough surviving between fat royalty cheques.

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Turkey prepares to hand $5bn to US biz for intelligent electricity

Mahatma Coat
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Mushroom

"Hey, Turkey...

....do what we say or we'll shut down your country with the flick of a switch."

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New Zealand court hands out second peppercorn downloading penalty

Mahatma Coat
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Pirate

Coldplay and Kesha?

There should have been an additional $10,000 fine on grounds of taste.

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George Bush's family emails, pics ransacked - and spewed online

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Bush Koch

Admit it, you sniggered too.

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El Reg contemplates the ultimate cuppa

Mahatma Coat
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It's a very personal thing...

...But my own preference is Earl Grey left to stew until it's almost cold. No milk or sugar. Great in a hot climate.

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Paper computers: Not mere pulp fiction

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Boffin

Paper wins

I have roughly half a metric tonne of books. Not one has ever failed (apart from one I was reading in the bath and fell asleep). Not one has had a flat battery. Not one has had a blue screen of death. I've never dropped one and thought "shit, I've just lost my entire book collection" as it splintered across the floor. The publisher and retailer don't know when I read their books.

Long live dead trees.

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Google, Mozilla, show off in-browser video chat

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Joke

It's good that Mozilla uses WebRTC...

...but Google seem to be using WebOrrrTC.

And do software people have any other adjectives than "great" and "awesome"?

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Under cap-and-trade, flying is greener than taking the bus

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I suppose it's possible...

...that this bloke is right and everyone is wrong. Statistics aren't exactly my field but, you know...

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We're not making this up: Apple trademarks the SHOP

Mahatma Coat
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Re: Prior art ?

The Apple shops are very different to all others. There's a far higher concentration of pillocks among staff and customers.

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BT inks 2 more gov-funded broadband deals

Mahatma Coat
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"speeds of at least 2Mbit/s to 90 per cent "

It's good to see them aiming so high.

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Huddled immigrant masses face 'British values' quiz

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Re: Questions Questions

The Alf Garnett Fan Club is in the house.

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Iran develops working ICBM: Intercontinental Ballistic Monkey

Mahatma Coat
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Alien

We need to hurry up and get to Mars to bring some of the mystique back.

I tend to agree but have the feeling that when the ship lands it will probably find a Chinese base there full of children making iPhones. It's be Scott/Amundsen all over again.

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Mahatma Coat
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Re: "before returning safely to Earth"

Silly me. I thought that when the first four words of the article said "Iran’s first monkey astronaut " I thought it meant it was Iran's first monkey astronaut. I shall go to bed without supper tonight feeling suitably chastised..

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Mahatma Coat
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Alien

"before returning safely to Earth"

That's not bad for a first attempt. Certainly better than some countries with bigger budgets managed.

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Brisbane online flood maps woefully inadequate

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FAIL

Maps, schmaps, who stole my comms?

While the south east corner of Queensland was doing the usual headless chicken routine, the rest of the state was without internet, mobile and landline services. An area containing most of the largest cities outside of the capital were in a communication breakdown for 22 hours, and this is the middle of our nasty natural disaster season.

Even worse was that the media didn't report on this until 2pm when the failure occurred at 6pm the previous day. The only reason we found out then was that a journalist asked the state premier about it. The premier said "we didn't know about it until 6am this morning".

Words almost fail me.

And we had the same weather system hit us with flooding several days earlier.

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Mayer! predicts! mobile! personalized! future! for! Yahoo! at! Davos!

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She said "graph"

Graph must be the new cyber.

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Activists urge Skype: Tell us who is spying on us

Mahatma Coat
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Re: A translation is required

para 2 reads: we've given the NSA a back door.

From this very organ in 2008:

Austrian official fuels Skype backdoor rumours

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