Posts by Mahatma Coat
904 posts • joined Thursday 11th June 2009 14:00 GMT
Kiwi accent...
...irritable vowel syndrome.
Posted in Harvey Norman warms to etail
If Harvey Norman goes into online retailing...
...the result will have slight smell of poo about it.
Like = Fail
I've seen stuff on Facebook about recent disasters where the Like function is massively inappropriate.
Example:
"10,000 killed in Japan tsunami."
"Jenny likes this."
I mean, FFS, can't they come up with a word better than Like?
Posted in Java daddy borged by Google
Everyone has a price
"Come and work for us."
"I couldn't do that, I'd look like a hypocrite."
"Here's a large bag of cash."
"When do I start?"
There's an encryption package called Mujhaddin Secrets?
That's just to fool you. It's actually a Halal perfume.
On Aussie TV tonight...
...a nuke expert from Imperial College, London, having to make a grovelling apology for saying it was all nothing to worry about a couple of nights earlier. Your move, Mr Page.
Nup
As Jeff 11 and two00lbwaster pointed out there are other reasons. Another one is that some users choose to keep their tweets private except for approved followers.
Broken Microsoft spelling checker
Seems it changed "the patent pool H.264 format" to "the industry-standard H.264 format".
Because he's worth it...
...Or not.
What was my point?
My point was one that you must have missed. I'm not talking about results, alternative sources of funding or anything else you mentioned. I'm talking about govt funds being used to finance propaganda centres for the terminally deluded. Schools are supposed to be places that kids go to learn facts not to be brainwashed.
Forcing religion down the throats of children too young to understand is nothing less than abuse.
It's 2011
So why should we be making any special allowances for Jews, Muslims, Christians, or any other group of gullible numpties.
We have science, we have reason, we have logic. Imaginary friends are redundant. Religious wars and sectarian bigotry have no place in the modern world.
Go away and stop trying to suck money out of the system for your special needs.
Problem Solving Award in 2010
"Speed Watch, has been running since 2001...the scheme, which has recently clocked its millionth speeding motorist"
1,000,000 speeding motorists? That doesn't sound like problem solved to me, that sounds like problem very much still exists.
Some days I get up earlier than usual...
...just so I can despise the likes of Google and Cameron a bit longer that day.
Cost difference between UK and Aus
BT will supply FTTP to 66% of UK (pop. 62m) for £2.5bn.
NBNco will supply FTTP to 90% of Aus (pop. 22m) for £27bn.
The difference can't all be in the distances between cities, surely? Does fibre optic string really cost that much?
There have been many odd calls since the cyclone
We were getting about 10 silent calls per day for a week. Several seconds of silence follower by a recorded voice of a lady saying "goodbye".
Also had one call from a gentleman with an accent that sounded like he was from the sub-continent offering advice on Windows (not a double glazing salesman) but I was too busy at the time to even tell him to shove his advice where the cyclone doesn't blow.
Grrrr
The whole version race thing is ridiculous.
How about all browser companies all call their next versions v10, then concentrate on getting the basics right and just offer new features as extensions?
Murdoch not the govt?
What country would that be? Seems like he almost rules the world these days.
I love the smell...
...of a desperate politician in the morning. Just like all of Kristina Keneally's stunts, this one is doomed to failure.
At first I thought this was an article about football...
...that spud photo has an uncanny likeness to Wayne Rooney.
Posted in The internet ate our homework
You're not wrong
Aussie book publishing/retailing has had an easy ride over the years thanks to government protection.
I love the sound of capitalists whining about capitalism and how unfair it is. So, Australian publishing mafia, you joined the club and you agreed to play by the club's rules. Don't cry hard-done-by when the rules come back to bite you on the arse.
Innovation, my arse
Looks from here like a bunch of acquirers, copiers and polo neck wearing pillocks. What does Obama hope to learn from this motley crew?
Posted in Hostworks in NSW Food Authority win
Is it just me and my Aussie IP address...
...or is El Reg really 50% full of Aussie IT stories of late?
"What's that, Skippy, standards have fallen down the mineshaft?"
Posted in Vodafone squeezes internet into TV
All Voda need to do now...
...is squeeze a decent phone service into a mobile phone.
Posted in TiVo hits pause button in Australia
Not much use to us...
...us being the people of Tully that currently don't have any electricity :)
If you want a .uk TLD you have to own the govt
Ask Rupert Murdoch, he may be able to sort you out.
Women's clothing disguise
A burka?
Australia Day plans
As any good Pom in Australia I shall start today reading El Reg and follow that an in-depth study of Australian culture. Then after breakfast...
Shenzhen
I was lucky enough to take a day trip to Shenzhen from Hong Kong in 1983. There was one high rise building, an eight storey hotel, and the rest was mostly slums.
The Chinese govt tour guides were very proud of one thing: The giant water tap (ceremonial fake, I'm sure) at the side of a reservoir. They claimed it controlled Hong Kong's entire water supply. A nice bargaining chip.
Hmmm
Sometimes I start to question my sanity when I see something as utterly braindead as this or am I missing the point? There a few other things going on in Australia that could really benefit from human ingenuity a bit more than this.
So long...
...and thanks for all the shit.
Posted in Boffins sex pterodactyls at last
The chap on the right is not entirely unfamiliar
It's the dead spit of a the Southern Cassowary:
https://secure.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/wiki/Cassowary
It's a very rare bird with an estimated 800 or so remaining in Australia. We get them wandering out of the forest and into our garden quite often, something I'm most happy about. When it comes to breeding they make giant pandas look like Catholics.
Melbourne isn't in Queensland...
...Melbourne is in Victoria, as is much of Queensland's water.
Speaking as a Queenslander...
...it's heartening to see so many people willing to donate items to those that need it. Your old tat box running XP sitting unloved and collecting dust in a cupboard is as good as a brand new PC to someone that has lost everything.
At the same time it's not easy to find out what's really happening as the media and some government mouthpieces are hyping up the impact to really stupid levels.
There have been so many patently false claims about the area that has been affected. I've seen one tweet that claimed the flooding was "bigger than hurricane Katrina" and "1 million sq miles of Queensland was under water". People retweet this nonsense without giving it a second thought when a couple of moments of research would show that the state is about 660k sq miles in total. There are plenty more similar examples doing the rounds.
A quick peek at NASA's satellite images for the flood period show the true extent of the flooding (I'll let you draw your own conclusions from those) but a lot of the media has been reporting floods of ark-building proportions.
I guess the moral of this story is one we should always consider: check the facts, check the sources, don't believe everything you see on TV or read in the papers (and their digital equivalents) and certainly take anything you see in "user-generated content" with a vast pinch of salt.
Web 2.0: it's made from wet kangaroo paws.
Hmmmm
"You sir deserve all the downvotes that you can garner"
Which seems to be approximately none at time of writing.
If you want a glimpse of the future look for an online film called EPIC 2014. It's about eight minutes long, IIRC, and worth every second.
Bye bye Internet, hello Applenet
And some fanbois still have the cheek to downvote comments that call them gullible.
<-- I'll get me coat. Thankfully it's not a mac.
Posted in Ace Reg reporter in career suicide shock
Out of the frying pan...
Good luck, Chris. The Register's loss is Tory Middle England's gain.
Don't forget your coat.
Posted in Airbus secures whopping 180 plane deal
IndiGo
That's a very simple but clever piece of branding.
BetterPrivacy extension for Firefox
BP seems to do a pretty good job but it's still just a sticking plaster for a bigger problem,
Top security
"Iraitz Gesalaga and Itxaso Uritiaga"
Usernames that will stand up to a dictionary attack. I'm impressed.
Posted in Italian bloke sneezes out .22 bullet
I'm waiting for the redneck comments...
....such as "guns don't kill people, New Year parties kill people".
The family did change their name...
...It was Hitler before.
Well f**k me sideways you're right...
...and I feel suitably chastised. Looking at all the downward pointing thumbs I now know how the Christians felt in the Colosseum.
Wasn't email figured out decades ago?
I just checked the RFCs and couldn't find any requirement to send mail to the wrong recipient. Must be a spiffy new Google feature.
I'm sure there are some good beers here...
...but they seem to be invisible in the local pubs. To be fair, I don't drink much and picking up the occasional dozen bottles of Spitfire or similar from a specialist bottlo sees me through the year. If it wasn't a six hour round trip I'd probably have a few more :)
I've lived in Aus for close to a decade...
...and in that time I've not come across any drink that remotely resembles beer. Gnat's piss, yes. Beer, sadly no.
Posted in Steve Jobs gets Obama love
And an even finer point...
...30 seconds of research shows that Mr Jobby "tasked about 200 of Apple's top engineers with creating the iPhone in autumn of 2006".
Another 30 seconds shows that Google bought Android Inc the summer of 2005 and they had already been in existence for 22 months.
So, yes, we possibly would have seen Android phones whether the iPhone existed or not.
Meh
Have a good one.
Posted in Coca-Cola fizzes over pornforacoke.com
Coke is strange choice...
...as most of the young ladies on the site seem to be partaking of some kind of dairy-based libation. Baileys, perhaps?
Merry Xmas all.
