1492 posts • joined Thursday 11th June 2009 12:46 GMT
I can hear the oinks of disappointment
....as the feeding trough is taken away.
But hydrogen is fun. Hydrogen goes *boom*.
Being serious for a moment, if you can't have a platform on the top of the balloon, you could launch from the side. From the top, it would look like a + sign, with strips bending downwards along the sides of the balloon. Three of the strips would have a weight on it equal to the plane, with the fourth holding LOHAN.
Can't say it really does on a smartphone. It may look cool having your icons stretching into the distance in your phone but unless you can actually reach through your touchscreen, there's naff all point to it. 3D TV on a phone will be distinctly underwhelming, given that it hasnt even taken off on larger screens and given the dearth of decent Android games in 2D, I fail to see many game developers taking advantage of 3D processing power.
When a tablet
...can run Deus Ex: Human Revolution smoothly, has a keyboard from a 20" inch laptop and can fit a gaming mouse, then we'll talk. Until then, this guy is talking out of his arse.
In future news....
The managing director of Foxconn was tragically killed today outside the Foxconn plant in China. Early reports suggest that he has been crushed to death by a robotic arm that was attempting the world's first recorded incident of "robot suicide". The arm has been offered theraputic programming and a firmware upgrade and should be back at work soon, once they've finished scrapping the managing director off him.
Neanderthals and accountants do share a few similarities. Both speak an incomprehensible "language", both have little in way of a personality and both enjoy hitting people with things. The accountant has just progressed to more advanced weapons.
Currently on Virgin Broadband. My connection is as reliable as a party manifesto pledge during a recession. But I'm not worried because I have the ever helpful Virgin Support Centre on hand:
"Hmmm, is the router plugged into the mains sir?"
"Is it switched on, sir?"
<cue grinding teeth> "Yes."
"Have you plugged the router into the phone socket on the wall?"
"I'm sorry sir, I'll have to escalate your call to one of the senior team."
<cue 15 minute wait>
"Hello sir, is the little internet icon visible in the toolbar?"
The Android Marketplace is now disorganised and chaotic? I can't say I've noticed any difference.....
"Online dating - marketisation, if you will - expands the number of people you might be able to have sex with. This is a bad thing?"
Yes, as it may result in another generation of Guardian columnists.
That really brings back memories
For the longest time as a child, I used to view computers as little more than glorified games machines. Oh, I'd sometimes type cheat programs in BASIC on my Amstrad but that's about as far as it got.
When my dad got his first PC, the pattern continued, with myself just playing a couple of games on it. Then one day I happened upon a tutorial for this weird thing called MS-DOS. It was confusing and terrifying but by the same token, oddly intruiging as well. I began poking around in different directories, learning how to move, copy and delete files using the command prompt. I even progressed to the arcane mysteries of creating custom config.sys and autoexec.bat files.
I was never blown away by Windows 3.x and only really started using it with the release of Windows 95. But I'll always be grateful to MS-DOS and that tutorial for showing me that there's more to computers than gaming.
If you really cannot hit something with a million rounds, try the newest invention from Metl Storm:
THE GRAVESTONE -
We decided that as a million rounds were not enough to guarantee killing your target, we melted down the bullets to form a lead slab with a very large surface area and weight. Simply helicopter the slab over your target and drop. The Gravestone is also the world's first fully resuable modern weapon system, assuming you don't mind the red smears.
I thought it was possible for light to surpass the speed of light if a black hole was involved. Could be wrong of course - xkcd hasn't done a comic strip on it and thus my knowledge of physics is limited.
"The fit and proper test"
"£18,000, £19,000, £20,000 - congratulations Mr Murdoch, you've successfully passed our rigorous testing procedure. It's going to be even more rigorous in the future when we bump our price up to £30k."
I'd like to congratulate El Reg
....on being perhaps the only news organ in the world not to have spent pages and pages lambasting Amy Winehouse as a drug addicted social wreckage, before making the mother of all U-turns and painting her as a beautiful delicate flower whose life tragically cut short.
F.A.O Apple fanbois in this thread
See the guy in the article? That's your new benchmark.
Real clock up there.
I AM MURDOCH SON OF MURDOCH!
FEAR MY LAWYERS!
These enquiries were set up on behalf of the public by politicians in order to clear the air for everyone, get to the truth of the matter and ensure that these mistakes are never repeated agai-
Ah, who am I kidding. They're all self serving motherfuckers with all the social conscience of a BOFH going after a paid vacation.
Watson asked Murdoch if it was true that his organisation had a zero tolerance to wrongdoing. The media tycoon answered "No. We encourage phone hacking in all forms while snorting copious amounts of cocaine off prostitutes tits." The media tycoon then promptly proceeded to facepalm.
You mean seppuku?
Swallowing large chunks of a London theatre can often prove fatal.
You are incorrect in this regard
It could indeed happen to a nicer pile of crap - The Daily Mail.
Perhaps a fake news story endorsing the health benefits of crack cocaine, or a review of Manhunt 2 written by a 6 year old?
Sad to say it...
...but eventually all MMOs must die.
I was really really sad to see the shutdown of Tabula Rasa. Admittedly, they could have worked on the endgame stuff more but it also had some really neat features (especially the Logos and class system). Same will happen to FF XI, Guild Wars 1 when 2 arrives. That doesn't mean to say they are not good games - they all have their merits.
But nothing lasts forever.
- Xmas Round-up Ten top tech toys to interface with a techie’s Christmas stocking
- Google embiggens its fat vid pipe Chromecast with TEN new supported apps
- Microsoft: Don't listen to 4chan ... especially the bit about bricking Xbox Ones
- Shivering boffins nail Earth's coldest spot
- Exploits no more! Firefox 26 blocks all Java plugins by default