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* Posts by Thomas 4

1522 posts • joined 11 Jun 2009

Irish woman doesn't go down after scrotum ripping assault

Thomas 4

Wow

Real balls-up for justice there. It's nuts she only got a suspended sentence. He's going to have trouble in the sack for quite a while.

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The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim

Thomas 4
Unhappy

No, this is Scrolls

Notch is working on The Elder Scrolls, I think.

IT'S TOO CONFUSING!

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Thomas 4

Now that....

....is a damn good idea, Mr AC.

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Thomas 4

Actually...

Civilisation ended because V was buggy PoS with moronic AI.

An MMO Skyrim - I dunno. The who free roaming world thing? Yeah, definitely want that in an MMO. A bunch of Horde/Alliance running around PVPing, griefing and generally being assholes? Hell no.

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NASA working on nuclear rocket for manned Mars trips

Thomas 4

A new, revised Space Program policy

"Fuck the nuclear sceptics, I want to see boots on Mars before I croak."

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What's that sound? It's PC sales plummeting into abyss

Thomas 4

Hmmm

I've actually been thinking of upgrading my old Alienware M17 laptop to a gaming desktop of some description. Given what the article says about sales in a nosedive, do you reckon I could pick up a good gaming rig for about £1,500?

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Vacuum cleaner set Swedish nuke plant on fire

Thomas 4

A burning vacuum cleaner makes an awful mess.

Someone will need to hoover it up. =/

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Go back to the future with Red Dwarf

Thomas 4

Quality vs quality

I would prefer to have 6 great episodes than 3 episodes that were basically self insert fan-fiction, mixed with some crap about Blade Runner.

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Thomas 4

If this *anything* like Back To Earth

...then I, and I suspect a lot of other RD fans, will be queuing up to hack its metaphorical balls off.

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PSP owners must pay to port games to PS Vita

Thomas 4
Unhappy

Listen, Sony...

In other forums, I've been trying to tell people that mobile phone games won't wipe out handheld consoles and that they still have a good future ahead of them. Please stop making my job more difficult by doing dumb shit like *CHARGING PEOPLE FOR A GAME THEY ALREADY OWN*.

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iOS upgrade swells iPhone battery-suckage grief

Thomas 4
IT Angle

"Open the pod bay doors, Hal."

"I'm afraid I can't do that, Dave."

"Why, have you got some sort of hidden mission objective that results in the termination of all the humans on board?"

"No. You upgraded me to iOS 5.0.1 and now I don't even have enough battery life to continue talk-"

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Hands on with the Sony PlayStation Vita

Thomas 4

Cheers for the more accurate sales info AC

I'd probably say the DS has more to worry about than the PSP, as the DS caters to a more casual market and thus the game types are more similar. I'd still be very reluctant to call it the death of the handheld games console though.

It's like the difference between a dog nibbling your hand and walking away with your wedding tackle between its jaws.

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Thomas 4

Xperia Play

Been tempted to get one myself because, as you point out, it has a dedicated gaming control system that allows full view of the screen.

If we wanted to make what I would class as a fair comparison of gaming systems, I'd go for things like PSP vs DS vs Xperia Play vs Nokia N-Gage because they are all dedicated gaming systems.

Claiming a PSP with God of War and an LG Optimus with Angry Birds are equivalent devices is not on.

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Thomas 4
Mushroom

Grrr

As I ranted in another comments section on, would people please shut the hell up about smartphone gaming being the death of the DS & PSP?

I'll reiterate what I said previously - the DS & PSP are dedicated handheld gaming systems, with very different pricing structures to mobile phones. When Angry Birds costs £34.99 at launch, then you can "start" to make comparisons.

There's also a question of volumes as well. The PSP sold 185,000 units at launch and the Nintendo DS 87,000 units. Let's extrapolate a little and say both have sold 1 million units ish by now. As of 2008, there were 75.7 *MILLION* mobile phones in use in the UK, a figure which I suspect is closer to 90 or 100 million by now.

How in the name of fuck can you say that's a fair comparison? If each mobile phone user bought just 1 game, the market share of Nintendo and Sony, two of the biggest games console manufacturers on the planet, instantly gets reduced to 1%.

TL;DR - When mobile phone games cost the same price, are of the same quality and are of the same prevalance as PSP or DS games, then you can harp on about mobile phones causing the death of the platforms.

Until then, kindly shut the fuck up.

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Chicken fillets: The affordable alternative to Bulgarian Airbags

Thomas 4

El Reg

Always keeping us abreast of the news.

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Fanboi called 911 repeatedly because iPhone didn't work

Thomas 4
IT Angle

Could have been interesting

Operator: "Emergency services, how can we assist?"

Fanboi: "My phone isn't working!"

Operator: "Excuse me sir, but do you require police, fire or ambulence service?"

Fanboi: "This iPhone isn't making calls!"

Operator: "Ah, you want our Paradox Resolution Service, sir. They'll be along shortly, just ignore the yellow sidearms they have with the pointy bits."

Fanboi: "Thanks very much."

<click>

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OFFICIAL: Last Western Black rhino snuffs it

Thomas 4
Flame

At least we got this cool looking ivory jewellery out of it

Fucking assholes.

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Smartphones rocket past consoles for mobile game sales

Thomas 4
FAIL

I disagree

The quality of Android gaming is dire, to say the least, as indicated by a distinct lack of Android game reviews on here.

Of course there are going to be more mobile phone game sales than PSP/DS game sales, ***because there are more mobile phones than PSP/DSes***. You cannot expect to qualify statements like "Sony's PlayStation Portable has lost out too" & "a decline of 36 per cent" *when smartphones and PSP/DS are two gaming systems*.

Basically, PSP & DS compete for market share because they are both standalone game systems, with similarly priced games. If you compare 1 million PSPs vs 1 million DSes vs 100 million smartphones, which one do you *think* is going to have the greater market share in games?

Fail.

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Thomas 4
Mushroom

@Barry

Agreed. Every time I read an article along these lines I die a little inside.

Can I get Super Mario World on an iPhone?

Can I get Final Fantasy Crisis Core on an Android?

No? Then shut the fuck up with the "death of the PSP and DS" angle which most articles like go for.

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Az mayor offers Prince Harry beer and pizza in fornication row

Thomas 4
Pint

In other news

Local excitement increased amongst the maidenry of Gila Bend when rumour spread about the Prince having a 12-inch.

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Amazon ups Kindle Fire production...

Thomas 4

You might even say

....that Kindleslab sales ARE ON FIRE!

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Apple: No Siri for old iPhone owners. Well, not from us

Thomas 4

Sure does

....right up to the point where you realise they didn't develop a damn thing and merely bought out someone that had created it on their App store.

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Thomas 4

Well, duh.

If we make the only thing the 4GS has going for it a £20 upgrade for everyone else, we can watch 4GS sales nosedive in a way that makes the Touchpad seem a roaring success.

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Lemmings

Thomas 4
Happy

I hope

...that green wigs were mandatory. Or at the very least green mop-heads!

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Thomas 4
Joke

@Thomas 18

Don't even get me started on the pathing issues.

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Nokia Lumia 800

Thomas 4
Meh

"It’s customary to start with a description of the hardware"

...except that it looks almost exactly the same as every other Win Phone out there and every other Win Phone that will ever be due to Microsoft's insistance on specfic design details.

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Russian probe engines crap out on way to Mars

Thomas 4
Unhappy

Oh dear

Looks like this probe didn't have enough grunt to break free of orbit.

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World of Warcraft subscriptions slip

Thomas 4
Meh

Agreed

I was a long time WoW player to the point where it almost consumed my life and I remember frothing at the mouth when the first ex-pac was to be released.

Burning Crusade came and went and the jade started to set in. I was never in a hardcore raiding guild so a lot of the top end stuff I never got to play, no matter how much time and effort I sunk in.

Then Wrath of The Lich King arrived. A few small scale features that didn't really add much apart from the new class, which involved revisiting content I'd already gone through a dozen times before, with dungeon runs consisting of 5 death knight teams. -.-

That was the point when I quit. Cataclysm was released and for a little while I was tempted to go back and see the new changes. Then I remembered that the good memories I have of WoW (and there are more than a few) were all from the old content - the endless Scholomance runs, dying in Zul'Gurub, the fishing contest and exploring with guildmates.

All those are gone forever.

I don't know if there's anything that would make me go back to WoW but what I do know is that it'll take more than a panda and a new class.

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Ten... high-end Android tablets

Thomas 4
Trollface

Dear Reg

Can you please forgo writing reviews altogether and just publish a percentage based score for each new bit of kit that comes out?

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HP seeks buyer for WebOS

Thomas 4

Quite right

It's not like IBM often buys mobile OSes just to sit on them....

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Are we in the middle of a PATENT BUBBLE?

Thomas 4

If we are in a patent bubble

Please form an orderly queue behind the needle.

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Bill Gates drops $1m on laser-based malaria fighter

Thomas 4
Trollface

Actually

His post quite neatly illustrates the issues of a surplus population and how it needs to be controlled, one commentard at a time....

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Duke Nukem Forever dev slams unfair reviews

Thomas 4
Meh

Well.....

I think Gearbox can make a very good Duke game. Borderlands was very successful and pretty solid - it's worth remembering that they were essentially building 4 games with several different engines into something workable.

Is DNF a good game? From what I played of it, no. Is there still the potential for a good game with the current dev team? I think so.

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Price-slashing fails to ignite PlayBook sales

Thomas 4

Why is this such as surprise to them?

Remember back in the 90s when there was a huge fight going on between Palm and HP for control of the PDA market? The reason why Palm lost was because HP were making big advances in wireless technology and in particular the integration of telephony systems into PDAs. As the smartphone market grew exponentially, the PDA market dwindled for the simple reason that people didn't want to carry around multiple devices to do one task - namely internet browsing.

After all, why shell out for £300 fondleslab *and* a £300 phone to browse the internet when the £300 phone can do it by itself or a £450 intergrated slab can do it by itself.

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Sony and Ericsson divorce

Thomas 4

Well, this is going to ruin someone's day

Either the PSP line is going to be phased out or Xperia Play is going to be phased out. No point having to competing ecosystems.

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Apple gets patent for ‘unlock gesture’

Thomas 4

Right, that does it.

I'm going to patent a revolutionary idea - I call it a "personal power management cycling system", with multi function capability:

A single activation of the PPMCS causes electricity to be diverted from the battery of the device to the main operational areas, such as the CPU and screen.

A second activation causes a temporary interrupt to the electricity diversion system for all non-critical device functions, such as the screen.

A long activation of the PPMCS causes a gradual cessation of the electricity diversion function, allowing all active device functions to cease operation in a controlled manner.

Someone get me Apple or Google on the blower and we'll talk.

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Web czar: 'Drag your nan online'

Thomas 4
Devil

Better idea

Tell them that by visiting www.magicallyfixmyinternetconnection.com, their internet connection will start working again, *THEN* hang up the phone.

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Union enraged by secret driverless Tube plan

Thomas 4

Any chance we could replace Bob Crow...

....with someone that isn't psychotically insane and willing to, oooh, I dunno, *NEGOTIATE* instead of getting on his mountain-high horse every time someone says something bad about the Tube?

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Father-of-three attacked teen after Call of Duty jibes

Thomas 4

Correct

I play a game called Heroes of Newerth and the community for that game makes CoD seem like its filled with sweet, kind and considerate angels.

And yet I keep playing it. Why? Because I *enjoy playing the game*. Why should my gaming habits be decided because someone else is a mouthy little shit?

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Thomas 4
Flame

If you insist on trolling

...don't be suprised when your arm gets ripped off by an angry great white shark..

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Griffin Technology Helo TC

Thomas 4
Unhappy

Sadly I have to agree

Was hoping for one that would work with an Android phone. Oh well.

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Saddam 'double' kidnapped by smut flick gang

Thomas 4

Welcome to the internet

www.dictator-porn.xxx

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Tearful skin-beaters say good bye to the BumChum

Thomas 4

Fascinating

I use bone conduction daily as part of my job as an audiologist - a small transducer placed behind the ear to check for conductive hearing losses. So if I understand this correctly, the BumChum sends vibro-tactile via the base of the spine?

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Motorola sharpens smartphones with revamped Razr

Thomas 4

Hmmmm

Let us know how you get on with it, in terms of day-to-day performance and external apps. I'd honestly be interested.

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Gulf of California terrorized by ONE-EYED MUTANT SHARK!

Thomas 4

Heh.

Eye see what you did there.

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Apple iPhone 4S

Thomas 4

@AC

Yes.

Take the article regarding the "10 Androids to outshine the iPhone 4S" . A large proportion of those are the the generic thin, big screen, little frills slab design *that is identical to every other smartphone design out there*. Do not get me wrong, quality *IS* important but there comes a point when one high quality slab design is much the same as another high quality slab design.

The very best scores should only be given to phones that *try something truly different* and are of high quality, rather than just a standard design of high quality.

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Thomas 4

And that

Is why smartphone design has stagnated over the past 2 or 3 years. There is almost no innovation left in smartphone design now - the Experia Play experiments with PSP technology and the Motorola Atrix at least flirts with the idea of powering a laptop.

But the rest? Flatscreen, a couple of buttons, call me when a new processor comes out. I'd like to see El Reg reign in its scores for new smartphones and only award 85-90% for phones that genuinely have innovative features and ideas. Regurgitating an existing design (please, slobbering fanbois, this applies to HTC's efforts as well as Apple's), no matter how fast the processor is or how well it's made, should net 75% tops.

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World Solar combatants rev their engines batteries

Thomas 4

And in next week's NT News

After pursuing a local felon in regards to a recent exclusive, a journalist for IT news website The Register was found being towed along the ground behind a 4x4. Police are baffled, along with everyone.

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Hubble snaps dark matter warping spacetime

Thomas 4

@D.A.M

Indeed. We need to investigate the source of this mysterious and malign power and shut it down if we can. Then we can enjoy our star-gazing in peace and quiet.

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RIM: 'Faulty switch took out faulty-switch-proof network'

Thomas 4

I'm looking forward to RIM's new phone

The Blackberry Chumawumba: "It gets knocked down, but it gets up again...."

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