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* Posts by Thomas 4

1514 posts • joined 11 Jun 2009

US federal boffins insist that mermaids DON'T exist

Thomas 4
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Re: "typical of a cetacean"

Hmmm.

A few moments thought would suggest that given the upper half of a mermaid is mammalian (often abundantly so), it makes sense that the lower half should share mammalian traits as well. So instead of all that nonsense of squirting a cloud of eggs out, the lower half of a mermaid would share traits with a whale or possibly a shark.

So what I'm saying is that you still get to hide the pink sea snake under the kelpy forest.

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Thomas 4
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IT Angle

Re: The truth about MERMAIDS:

The truth is mermaids are not found in American waters but instead near Japan. A witness to a battle between Cthulhu and the Amazonian Mermaids gave Japan its flourishing tentacle porn industry.

True story.

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Naked Scarlett Johansson pic snatch 'is worth 6 years' porridge'

Thomas 4
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Oo

Seriously, let me know how that plays out.

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Thomas 4
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IT Angle

The man is a fool

$150,000 for some extremely dull nudie pictures when the web has a plethora of very high-quality wrist exercisers for a fraction of the cost.

.....

Not that I know anything about that, being a respectable gentleman.

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Nexus 7 and Surface: A bonanza for landfill miners

Thomas 4
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Thumb Down

An extremely pessimistic article this

So what you're saying is that Google and Microsoft will never be able to catch up with the iPad and therefore should just let Apple have free reign in the tablet market?

You say that the reason the Kindle and iPad are successful is because of their content market - a point I agree with. But content does not grow on trees - device first, then the content grows. Expecting a device to launch an iPad-equivalent amount of content available is foolishness.

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Reg hack attempts gutsiest expenses claim EVER

Thomas 4
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Re: Errrr....

True but that napkin specifically says a total of 9800.

You know what these reporter types are like.

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London cops order Julian Assange to turn himself in

Thomas 4
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Facepalm

....

"Why certainly officer, I'll be only too pleased this little diplomatic safe haven I have at the moment and put myself in British custody because your legal process has really been going in my favour lately."

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Ministers consult public on 'opt in for smut' plans

Thomas 4
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Re: There will be trouble

The problem is, when people "think of the children", they don't [i]actually[/i] think of the children, they just think about how they can avoid awkward conversations with them. And then bad shit like this happens.

ACs - I have a lot of LGBT friends I speak to online in a very close community and I think I can say that if it hadn't been for that community and the access they have to it, a lot of them would have followed a similar path.

*proudly ticks "I am a disgusting pervert rather than a morally conflicted prude" box*

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Half the team at the heart of the RBS disaster WERE in India

Thomas 4
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IT Angle

Re: Three things

Especially if Bob doesn't have much incentive to explain it properly and lot of incentive to watch the system go titsup.

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Raspberry Pi to skipper microship across Atlantic

Thomas 4
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Go

Re: Tupperware

You know, this sort of input is usually reserved for the El Reg SPB.

We've conquered space, next stop the ocean! Maybe we could have a Pi powered mini sub exploring an ocean trench - wouldn't that be awesome? =D

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Dell extends XPS laptop line

Thomas 4
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IT Angle

Seriously, help me out here

This isn't a troll post, I am genuinely puzzled.

Why on earth would anyone by an Ultrabook? They seem to be extremely expensive but offer little or no more performance than a standard laptop. Does the thinness really justify such a whopping great mark up in price? Or am I missing something here?

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69,000 sign petition to save TV-linker O'Dwyer from US extradition

Thomas 4
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Re: @Mad Mike

"I thought the idea of extradition was for serious offences only."

Making money in Hollywood is srs bsns.

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Microsoft: no plans to make own phones

Thomas 4
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Re: Makes sense

HP hasn't killed their tablet because "HP is totally commited to the future of WebOS."

I'm sure if I say it enough times I might actually believe it.

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Chinese 'nauts couple successfully without help of machines

Thomas 4
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Re: Taikonauts

It's the sequel to Tim Schafer's legendary platformer - SET IN SPACE!

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RBS collapse details revealed: Arrow points to defective part

Thomas 4
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Meh

If only.....

I just saw this on another news site:

"The boss of Royal Bank of Scotland and NatWest has told Sky News that senior management will face "proper accountability" over the computer chaos when deciding on bonuses."

When popped into Google Translate (Bullshit -> English):

"We're only going to award ourselves a 1 million pound bonus instead of the 2 million we originally planned. The poor shmucks we've been running ragged with overtime this past week will receive fuck all and we'd really like our ex-IT staff to stop laughing at us now please."

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Speedball 2 Brutal Deluxe

Thomas 4
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Happy

Re: No mention..

Xenon 2 was the first PC game I ever played. Couldn't remember whether it was a Bitmap game or not.

It was, however, awesome.

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Thomas 4
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Not bad...

....but my favourite Bitmap Brother's game was The Chaos Engine. Classic style shooter with chunky solid graphics for the time. If anyone knows where I can get an emu version, I'd appreciate it.

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Assange: Australian neglect made me flee to Ecuador embassy

Thomas 4
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The man is grinding my gears now

My mind is finding it harder and harder to associate "Julian Assange (TM)" with "Wikileaks" and easier to associate him with the term "bail jumping, narcissistic publicity whore".

The US don't need to go to any lengths to kill the credibility of Wikileaks, sadly. Julian Asshole is doing a superlative job himself.

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William Shatner confirms Devon town actually prostitute free

Thomas 4
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...

You must meet the most interesting sources when you work for El Reg.

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Sony slams Nintendo Wii U functionality

Thomas 4
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Re: No shit, Sherlock

This makes the assumption that the 3DS isn't completely dead already.

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FATTIES are DESTROYING THE WORLD, scream mad professors

Thomas 4
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Re: Does it help?

Well, if we're trying to get rid of useless weight, we could probably start with the guys that wrote the paper.

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Tomb Raider dev denies Croft rape scene

Thomas 4
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Re: How does that work, exactly?

Hmmmm.

I've just watched the trailer and Lara's various reactions, not just in that scene, which frankly was too quick for me to make out clearly what was going on but overall, she does seem to have been reduced to a spineless wimp that complains all the time. What happened to the Lara that offered naff James Bond like quips before blasting someone in the face?

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Thomas 4
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Re: Disgusted.

I am also disgusted - worrying about pointless crap like this when they should be either desperately trying to inject decent gameplay into this dead horse of a series.

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Logitech's G600 mouse packs keypad too

Thomas 4
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Nice idea, but....

I play a fair few MMOs but I don't think a mouse with that many buttons in such a small area is a good idea, especially for those of us with huge sausage digits. I can all too easily imagine hitting the wrong buttons by mistake and sending a raid encounter up Clusterfuck Creek.

My current dekstop uses a Razr Nostromo gaming pad and a Deathadder mouse. Same number of buttons but much, much more managable.

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Supreme Court dismisses Assange bid to reopen extradition case

Thomas 4
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Re: Is he still news?

Mr Assange (TM) is a valiant defender of free speech and liberty, except for those bits of it currently rotting away in a military prison on his behalf.

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Raspberry Pi IN THE SKY: Wallet-sized PC is disaster drone brain

Thomas 4
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Pint

This is a true application of technology

Low cost but the potential to help so many people, even if it's just with basic post-disaster mapping and sensor recordings. I wish them the very best of luck.

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Male, female Chinese 'nauts prep for trip to Heaven and back

Thomas 4
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Unhappy

.....

That's the second time this week I've clicked on an article, only to find it completely devoid of zero-gravity goings-on. I feel like I'm being shamelessly trolled here.

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HBO wants royal price for Iron Throne

Thomas 4
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Re: upgrade option

That'll be an extra $10,000.

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Thomas 4
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Please tell me that's a typo

$18,000 for some guy to put a chair in a van, drive a few hundred kilometres and chuck it unsigned on a driveway?

I am in the wrong line of work.

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Gov exposes 8,000 GPs so punters can pick one

Thomas 4
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A brilliant idea

So you find out your local GP surgery is staffed exclusively by assholes and when you try to go to one of the "nice" ones, you find out you're not in their catchment area.

Net benefit - Fuck all squared in a box.

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China a lover, not a fighter ... IN SPAAAAAACE

Thomas 4
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Disappointed

Read the title, was hoping for an article on very high altitude nookie.

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Legendary sci-fi fantasy author Ray Bradbury exits planet Earth

Thomas 4
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Re: Something Wicked This Way Comes

The Illustrated Man was the first book of his I read at the age of 15 and subsequently plowed my way through the rest of my parent's Bradbury collection.

Just trying to remember - which book was it that had a short story about a city that was alive and ate a bunch of explorers?

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Tape lives: LTO-6 rolls out – with more than TWICE the capacity

Thomas 4
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Coward

*Real* men store their data on tapes, then cry when they get a Read Error B and have to load it all over again.

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Sony awards PlayStation cert to HTC handsets

Thomas 4
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FAIL

Laziness

Put simply, it's fricking laziness.

I'm an Xperia Play owner and when I heard that there were going to be PSOne games available for it, I was really enthusiastic - a lot of my favourite titles were PSOne games - Final Fantasy, Legacy of Kain, Parasite Eve, Crash Bandicoot 3, Silent Hill - all kinds of really great PSOne titles that I would love to play on a phone with a control system that supported them natively.

Instead what happened was that after releasing the Sony owned titles like Medieval, Crash Bandicoot and WipeOut, I never saw another PSOne title released by them. What a waste, thanks to nothing more than rampant apathy.

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NHS fights record £325k ICO fine after clap records appear on eBay

Thomas 4
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And the moral of the story is....

Don't buy clapped out hard drives off eBay.

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Star Trek's Scotty boldly goes where he always wanted to

Thomas 4
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Pint

Re: Lee Dowling

There are worse places for your remains to spend eternity that watching over the Earth and gazing out across the infinite reaches of space.

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Activision may bung Bungie $2.5m ratings-based bonus

Thomas 4
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=/

Bungie: "We're finished with Halo and we want to move on and do new things!"

Gaming community: "Wow, cool, so what great new things can we expect from you guys?"

Bungie: "We're working on an FPS with a sci-fi theme to it!"

Gaming community: .......

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Ouch! Facebook slumps below IPO value on day 2

Thomas 4
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Re: $35

Can anyone else hear a funny gurgling noise right now?

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The Register is rocking on Windows Phone 7

Thomas 4
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Trollface

At last

The high percentage scores Win Phones have been getting in El Reg reviews are finally justified.

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Post-pub nosh deathmatch: Mealy pudding v migas

Thomas 4
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FAIL

Re: Wot! No beanz?

Screw the beans, where's the damn hash browns? You have an article dedicated to cooking things mortal frying pans were not designed to cope with and then you show us a breakfast with no hash browns?

Epic Fail, senor.

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Compare The Market can't touch web filth extension - simples

Thomas 4
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FAIL

Re: X-rated Meerkats

I now have a mental image of a lady's intimate area singing opera. I hate you so much right now.

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Monty Python and the Holy Grail on Blu-ray

Thomas 4
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Re: Weighs more than a Duck

Judging by the horrific grinding noises my DVD drive makes when it's installing something, I'd have to say yes.

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Thomas 4
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Extra extras

I was kind of hoping for a scratch 'n' sniff card with it so that now you really can smell the Elderberries!

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Game goes titsup in Australia

Thomas 4
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@DrXym

In my case, I pre-ordered Diablo III. The reason was twofold:

1) I wanted to play on launch day without having to waiting 13 hours to download the game.

2) I wanted the Collector's Edition, which *is* limited in quantity, with all the various cds, books and digital bits present and correct, something, unlikely with a second hand copy.

What actually happened was I ordered it through Amazon and from what I can gather the wretched thing still hasn't even left the damn warehouse yet. -.-

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Vote now for the worst movie NEVER made

Thomas 4
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Before reading these movie pitches....

I merely used to *think* the El Reg forum crew were a deranged and perverse bunch of screw ups.

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Carmageddon coder seeks gamers' cash for revamp

Thomas 4
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Meh

Re: Post I made on the Steam forums about this:

I dunno, I'd have to disagree that all Kickstarter games are like that. Grim Dawn springs to mind - the team developing it (the same guys that made Titan Quest) have managed to make the basic outline of the game including some very solid looking demos of actual gameplay footage and have turned to Kickstarter to get it finished off.

Not disagreeing with your take on the Carmageddon project - if they really did spend 333k just getting the naming rights before doing a spot of code - but don't be too quick to discourage others from looking into Kickstarter games.

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Head over Heels

Thomas 4
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Classic indeed

Sadly though I doubt this game would sell in the modern day, especially as a multiplayer:

"FFS noob Head, you can't aim donuts worth shit!"

"lawl, fail Heels can't do the pick up & jump trick"

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'Giant vampire squid' seeks social media guru

Thomas 4
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Hmmmm

"Giant Vampire Squid" is not a bad analogy but it instantly puts me in mind of a Facehugger from Alien. You deeply regret making out with it and then find out in the worst possible way it left a little surprise for you.

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Nokia: 'hybrid' mobiles will save us

Thomas 4
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Re: Dear Jorma :- I am curious.

I fall under the category of want Nokia to go back to what they were in the late 90's and early of 2000-2010. I want to see them push *original* ideas for phones, stuff like the Communicator range, the original N-series phones, the apocalypse surviving 6210. I want to see PHONES from them, not black slabs with Windows OS shoehorned into a generic form factor.

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Microsoft mulls phone-style contracts for Xbox

Thomas 4
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Facepalm

Oh for fuck's sake....

Seriously?

It's bad enough that we can't even sell on or pass on our games anymore and now you want us to rent our fucking consoles as well?

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