* Posts by Peter Simpson 1

984 posts • joined 10 Jun 2009

Winklevoss twins eye up NASDAQ: Publicly traded Bitcoin fund... what could go wrong?

Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

Pair of twits?

They may be very nice people, but their actions to date indicate to me that they are clueless and so detached from the real world as to have not a clue what to do with themselves. Fortunately, they have loads of cash, so getting a real job isn't necessary.

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Cameras for hacks: Idiot-proof suggestions invited

Peter Simpson 1
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Oh, and "F" the manual -- nobody ever reads it anyways. The UI is almost intuitive. Suggest you get the intern to distill the multipage multilanguage manual that comes with the camera to a single cheat-sheet.

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Peter Simpson 1
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Pint

Powershot S90 here. Love it, but question its "beer-proof-ness".

I'd suggest one of the Panasonic "splashproof" P&S cameras. Got one for my wife and she takes it snorkeling.

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Spain clamps down on drones

Peter Simpson 1
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Black Helicopters

Easy! Just get the SPB LOHAN project adopted as an official arm of the Spanish Space Agency. What? They don't have one? Well, now they can!

// helicopter 'cause no drone icon

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Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Re: Roof antennas are a laugh

I'd go for the "no preblem with the antenna as long as I get free service" approach.

May as well get something for the inconvenience. Of course if my proposal is denied, my attitude would rapidly switch to "nice antenna you have there...be a shame if something was to happen to it"

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Scariest NSA revelation yet: Spooks are RUBBISH at CIPHERS

Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Ob:

"Be sure to drink your Ovaltine."

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10 PRINT "Happy 50th Birthday, BASIC" : GOTO 10

Peter Simpson 1
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Re: C

(* Seriously. Been there, done that. 6809 circa 1980.)

Oh, yeah, you and your fancy-pants index register with the arithmetic operations. When I was a lad, we had INX and DEX and were glad of it!

(6802, and we built the Data General Dasher D200 around it in 1978).

// Good times.

// We would have built a Pac-Man game into it if we had had enough spare RAM...one of my regrets.

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Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

Re: C

I believe C is best described thusly:

"It combines the power and flexibility of assembly with the readability and ease-of-use of assembly."

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Comcast to dump 3.9 MEEELLION subscribers to quell Time Warner merger antitrust fears

Peter Simpson 1
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Unhappy

Re: Not be a monopoly?

In my Massachusetts town, we have a choice between Comcast and FIOS. Same price (within a couple of bucks), for similar data rates.

So...not really much of a choice at all.

I'm thinking of telling Verizon to wire me up for FIOS, then playing Comcast and Verizon off againste each other every time the "introductory" rate expires.

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Spy back doors? That would be suicide, says Huawei

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Most Americans doubt Big Bang, not too sure about evolution, climate change – survey

Peter Simpson 1
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Paris Hilton

"Science ignorance is pervasive in our society,"

I don't think it's limited to any one particular field.

The sad thing is, we *have* the technology...in spades (broadcast, printed and internet), but it's the content that's nissing, plus the motivation of the idiots who'd rather watch "reality TV" than learn something.

// thanks for letting me vent

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Tooled-up Ryobi girl takes nine-inch grinder to Asus beach babe

Peter Simpson 1
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Check McMaster or Grainger. Carbon brushes are often a standard size and can be ordered as generic replacements.

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Peter Simpson 1
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Paris Hilton

Amateurs...

Has anyone mentioned the Ridgid Tools calendar yet?

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So, just how do you say 'the mutt's nuts' in French?

Peter Simpson 1
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Re: Testicul par canem

Romanes eunt domum!

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Peter Simpson 1
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Childcatcher

Re: Spanish

All hat and no cattle?

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Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

THIS is why I read El Reg!

Furthering my linguistic skills is a far better use of my time than anything my silly employer wants me to work on.

// My hovercraft...eels!

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95 floors in 43 SECONDS: Hitachi's new ultra-high-speed lift

Peter Simpson 1
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Thumb Up

Re: And what would happen

[see above ^^^]

Sounds like a fine piece of technology...

and

Good technologies always need backups

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Peter Simpson 1
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Joke

Re: Comparison with Toyota Aygo

A lift which can climb faster than a Porsche 911 is not to be sneezed at.

Thrown up at, more likely.

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Sleuths find nosy NORKS drones on the Chinternet

Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

Taiyuan Navigation Friend Aviation Technology

Needs to work on the "Navigation" part of their technology, methinks. That, and the fuel capacity.

Maybe the SPB could pick up a few quid on a consulting contract?

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Record labels sue Pandora over vintage song royalties

Peter Simpson 1
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Childcatcher

Re: Who Is Ripping Whom, RIAA?

Thus, the term "Hollywood accounting".

// applies to record companies, too -- actually, they probably invented it in the first place.

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LOHAN and the amazing technicolor spaceplane

Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

Re: However...

These little details are important!

Bravo!

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Peter Simpson 1
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Thumb Up

Re: Perfect

Absolutely!

And all parties involved appear to have been thoroughly enjoying themselves throughout the entire process!

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Spanish village called 'Kill the Jews' mulls rebranding exercise

Peter Simpson 1
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Devil

Re: This message brought to you by religion

And, if you can't afford to travel, choose from among your neighbors, and torture/kill them. Extra points for selecting those of differing beliefs and/or skin color. Make sure to remind them that if they convert to your religion, you'll still kill them, but they'll go to heaven.

// it's not the "religion" part, it's the "organized" part that's the problem.

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Live coverage: Blood Moon looms large for North, South America

Peter Simpson 1
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FAIL

Boston, Massachusetts: true to form

Solid overcast, not even a glow visible through it (yes, I got up at 1 AM and checked).

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Russian deputy PM: 'We are coming to the Moon FOREVER'

Peter Simpson 1
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Alert

Re: Could not have timed it better

Space Race II -- this time, it's personal!

[insert photo of shirtless Putin here]

//it's all fun & games, 'till the SPB gets involved!

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So you invent a wireless network using LEDs, what do you do next? Add solar panels. Boom

Peter Simpson 1
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Re: "Professor Harald Haas, who came up with the Li-Fi idea"

Meh...it's been done:

http://www.cbronline.com/news/bicc_claims_infralan_as_first_standard_wireless_network_for_token_ring

// barely worked at 16Mbit/s, IIRC

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Internet is a TOOL OF SATAN that destroys belief, study claims

Peter Simpson 1
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Re: Choose your poison @Trevor Pott

I think we may have accidentally hit up on the problem with organized religion:

the selection and dosage of communion wine

Perhaps a change is in order?

// whisky icon lamentably missing, but perhaps I have some in my pocket

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Peter Simpson 1
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Linux

Re: So access to information

"That's not fair - not all Opera Apple Linux users are like that !"

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Japanese schoolkids arrested in £2.4 MEEELLION phone fraud bust

Peter Simpson 1
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FAIL

Happened to a coworker

Unfortunately for the "friend", my coworker is in IT:

"Hey, it's Joe -- I need some money"

"Sure, Joe. Just tell me the name of the play we co-starred in in High School"

"Hey, I really need the money"

"You know, you're a bad person?"

"ahhh...."

// waiting for my chance...

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Reg LOHAN spaceplane: Punch and Judy show in comedy non-explosive climax

Peter Simpson 1
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Pint

You think YOU have problems?

The hated Yankees beat our Red Sox 4-1 in their first meeting of the year last night in New York.

Repeat after me:

"There's always next time!"

Good luck, guys...

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The gift of Grace: COBOL's odyssey from Vietnam to the Square Mile

Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Real Programmers *and* Mythical Man Month?

Two of the greatest writings in computer history.

// The third, of course, is K&R.

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Why won't you DIE? IBM's S/360 and its legacy at 50

Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

The Mythical Man-Month

Fred Brooks' seminal work on the management of large software projects, was written after he managed the design of OS/360. If you can get around the mentions of secretaries, typed meeting notes and keypunches, it's required reading for anyone who manages a software project. Come to think of it...*any* engineering project. I've recommended it to several people and been thanked for it.

// Real Computers have switches and lights...

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'Bank couriers' who stole money from OAP cancer sufferer jailed

Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Better rule - if they call you, don't do it!

When someone calls you, be extremely skeptical of anything they say. Refuse to cooperate.

If it's your bank, wait a while (so this scam doesn't work) then call them back at the number on the back of your card and ask them if they just called you.

If it's Microsoft, feel free to do anything necessary to keep them on the line, there's a contest running for longest time. My best is 20 minutes, answering all the questions, clicking and making sure he could hear me typing. I didn't bother telling him I was running Linux, and the menus are close enough that he continued along with his script, but finally gave up and told me to call Microsoft's support number.

It was then that I asked him (still playing the dumb user) if I should tell them I was running Linux.

There was a pause, then the start of a swear, then he hung up, leaving my wife and I ROFL for quite a while...she had immediately passed the call to me when she realized what it was and had been listening to my "efforts" to follow his instructions.

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Driver drama delays deep desert XP upgrade

Peter Simpson 1
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Facepalm

Re: Windows 7 upgrade advisor anyone?

Atheros had the driver (took a couple of attempts to get the correct one).

'twould be nice...if every manufacturer took more than a passing interest in supplying working, bug-free, current rev drivers, for *ALL* their current and former products, clearly labelled as to which chips they are for, in an easily found location on their corporate website.

// I can dream, can't I?

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Lego is the TOOL OF SATAN, thunders Polish priest

Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Re: In the dark, bare feet

As a teen, I developed my own film. Working in the darkroom is a super way to learn obstacle-avoidance skills which have served me well throughout my life.

Mostly. The downside is that the extra confidence causes me to move decisively, rather than tentatively, and the few toe/obstacle collisions that do occur are consequently at high speed.

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Crashed NORKS drones discovered by South Korea

Peter Simpson 1
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Black Helicopters

Re: Auntie Bee has pictures of the drone

Some bright Nork spark has figured out how to get the state to pay him to build and fly model airplanes.

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El Reg's Deep Outback XP upgrade almost foiled by KILLER ARACHNIDS

Peter Simpson 1
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Pint

Handy musical guide

How do we identify which sheep are OK and which aren't?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eNEeq5qGh8I

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Can you tell a man's intelligence simply by looking at him? Yes

Peter Simpson 1
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Mushroom

Re: Yeah, well, I mean, innit.

...Russia is full of beautiful women who grow old and turn into shot-putters.

I believe that's referred to as the "babushka bomb" effect.

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Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

...attractive and dumb as bricks...

Cause, or effect? If they know they can get anything they want with a jiggle and a smile, why bother to learn anything? Starts early, too.

My beloved is average looking and quite intelligent.

// Oh, hello, dear! Didn't see you there.

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NSA plans to FREE YOUR DATA with range of cloud services, analytics

Peter Simpson 1
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Black Helicopters

So that guy on the phone last night...

...warning me about my Windows system being infected?

He was from NSA?

// that must be where Santa gets the Naughty and Nice lists from...even HE outsources!

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Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Re: I took one look at today's date...

...but then...it's actually quite a good idea, isn't it?

And if we only charge 1/10 of what Carbonite charges, we could balance the Federal budget in five years.

Gee, Thanks, Obama!

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Artists install Monty Python silly walk signs in Norwegian town

Peter Simpson 1
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Mushroom

Blasphemy!

Kill them!

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Tokyo to TXT warning of incoming Norks nukes

Peter Simpson 1
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Mushroom

Surely the Lunar New Year would be a better choice for that demographic?

// DUCK-N-COVER!!!

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Homeopathic remedies contaminated with REAL medicine get recalled

Peter Simpson 1
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Coat

Re: Bah!

I've found that being close enough to control very small pieces of vibrating quartz (at a frequency in the 40m band) has a relaxing effect...but only if the oscillations are controlled at a rate above 15 wpm.

// the one with the key in the pocket

// de KA1AXY

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First pics: Comet-chaser Rosetta hurtles towards icy prey, camera in hand

Peter Simpson 1
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Joke

Re: Science is amazing

You have to pull.

How else do you set the hook?

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Brit game devs WILL get tax relief for, er, EastEnders Game and Legend of Slough

Peter Simpson 1
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Happy

Chav designer?

...see how many different objects you can decorate with the Burberry plaid design

// there seems to be no Burberry icon?

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Peter Simpson 1
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Alien

Re: grand theft auto -Lambeth?

Be sure to pick your target vehicle carefully. The game will only allow you to actually start hotwired cars with ignition systems manufactured by someone other than Lucas...

// Prince of Darkness icon?

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Banks lob sueball at Trustwave, Target over breach

Peter Simpson 1
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Holmes

Re: The underlying problem is,,,

Because IT is at the heart of these businesses, you would think they'd have at least one main board director with fundamental IT systems knowledge and expertise.

But then, they'd need someone senior to that IT director to check to see if the candidates were just spouting a line of BS, or if they really knew what they were talking about.

It's a never-ending cycle of people knowing just enough to sound like they know what they're doing, when in fact, all they need to know is a few choice nuggets that their boss doesn't understand.

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Apple vows to add racially diverse EMOJIS after MILEY CYRUS TWITTER outrage

Peter Simpson 1
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Facepalm

Re: Oh no, Unicode Consortium taken over by cats

...and to think: it's someone's job to manage that ^^^ list.

// wonder how much they're paid?

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Peter Simpson 1
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Facepalm

Re: Wait a minute there......

Try to keep up here.

I had to look up "emoji" myself. Apparently, they're of Japanese origin (think smileys crossed with Hello Kitty). These are emoticons 3.0 -- and cover pretty much anything cute you might ever think of communicating. Especially things an 8 to 12 year old might think of.

Actually, *exclusively* things an 8 to 12 year old might think of.

Smiling Turd isn't my favorite, but it's right up there with Helpful Information Woman.

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