That is... actually from the new season of South Park (S18E05 to be precise), which having watched the Book of Mormon a few times, I think Trey Parker and Matt Stone exceeds Mighty Boosh in levels of wierd.
92 posts • joined 19 May 2009
Ahhh, good times
I remember well this bit of software on my first PC. I didn't have a joystick and it made some games appear impossible to master when compared to my friend who did have a joystick. I still recall with frustration trying to pull tricks on the BMX and failing more often than not.
Kids these days will never know that kind of frustration of only having 1 or 2 games available to you at any time and therefore you having to master it or not play at all.
I am sure that at least half of those clicks must be from annoyingly placed/popup adverts in kids games.
Over it now
When the messenger app came along and was forcing you to install it if you wanted to send messages I stuck with the older version of the farcebook app on my phone so that I could at least get onto the site and whatnot.
Since I changed phone about a month ago, I haven't even bothered re-installing/ revisiting farcebook. Don't think I will, heck, might even go all the way and delete the account as I hardly used it, apart from when I used to post pictures for relatives... on the app, which is a no-goer now.
So in fact, this move has lost you one user. Well played Zuk... well played.
BT Broadband issue
A large number of my sites today have lost internet connection across the board.
My ISP tell me that there is an issue nationwide that they are investigating. Looking on BT's website they say
"We're really sorry but we've got a major broadband problem impacting the UK, which means that some of our customers will be having trouble getting online. We're trying to fix the problem as quickly as we can.
Please revisit this page for further updates. "
Anyone got any idea what is actuallly going on with this?
One from the other side of support
Once, many many moons ago I used to work for a computer company that thankfully went bankrupt.
One such tale that stuck with me was a call answered by one of the senior techies that we all listened in on.
Lady: *crying* It's not working!!!! I don't know what I have done
Tech: I'm sorry ma'am. If you calm down and explain it to me then I can help you
Lady: But it is not working, I don't know why it isn't working
This back and forth went on for a few minutes, eventually he got her to calm down and stop crying.
Tech: Ok ma'am, can you please tell me what the problem is.
Lady: It's not talking to me!
Tech: Huh? You mean it is not making any noises? Perhaps it is the sound card. I can tell you what cables to check to make sure the sound card is working.
Lady: It's not talking to me!! Why is it not talking to me?!
Tech: *Goes through the checks regardless, confirms the sound card is working* I am sorry to sound dim here, but what exactly is it that should be talking to you?
Lady: The computer... it should be talking to me. I saw it on that TV show ( I think she said it was Star trek, but honestly we were laughing too hard at this point to hear the whole conversation).
Lady: Is someone laughing at me??
Tech: Oh no, sorry, someone just told a funny joke on the next desk over.
They used to make us techies jump on customer support if they were lacking staff members or if their call queue's were too high.
Not specifically IT related, but just to give you an example on how daft some users are.
Me: Welcome to **** customer support, how can I help you?
Very Irate person: I am not happy. I want to speak with your manager.... NOW!!!
Me: Well sir, I would be happy to assist you if you just tell me what the problem is
VIP: No. I don't want to be fobbed off again, I called you guys up the other day and someone there told me to go to the shop. I took the day off to go to your shop and they told me that they could not help me and to call you. I called you again and they sent me out the wrong thing! I don't want to have to explain myself yet again!!
Me: Well sir look. I can't get a manager on the phone if I can't even tell them what the problem is.
VIP: *huffs loudly* FINE.... well, I went to your shop and ordered the premium package.. and I am not happy because I didn't get everything.
Me: Ok Sir, well that sounds simple enough, if you tell me what software package it is you are missing and I will send it out to you.
VIP: *getting audiably more irate by the minute* WELL, if it is so simple then how is it you people have managed to screw me around so much?!?!
Me: I am sorry sir. I meant no offence. If you just calm down and tell me what it is you are missing I can see what I can do to help you.
VIP: Well, when I went to the shop and they showed me what the premium package was, it came with all these bits of software.
Me: Ok, so which bit of software is it that you are missing?
VIP: NO! I never said I was missing any software! Thats what I told the first guy I spoke with and they just sent me the same disc's I already have
Me: Umm.... ok. So what it is that you are missing Sir?
VIP: When I went to the store and they showed me the computer, the cd's came in a little cardboard box... I paid for it, so I want that box!
Me: Ok sir, let me put you on hold...... *goes to find the nearest wall to slam my head into*
When supporting a school many years ago
The scene is that at the time I was talking with a primary school teacher who said the particular educational software I supported was not working.
Me: Ok, we need to go check the internet proxy settings to make sure that nothing has changed.
Teacher: Uhh, ok,.
Me: Can you right click the mouse on Internet Explorer
Me: Thats the big blue icon
Teacher: Umm... sorry, I don't know what you mean. I don't have a mouse
Me: Oookkaaayyy.... Can you look at the back of the computer, look for the purple and green connectors, is there something plugged in there?
Teacher: *sounds of scrambling under desk*... oh yes... there is something plugged into that
Me: Ok, follow that cable, it should go to your mouse
Teacher: Oh that... no, we have a ladybug, not this mouse thingy you are talking about
Me: Right.. so you have a mouse in the shape of a ladybug.
Teacher: If you say so.
Me: Ok, can you right click the mouse on the big blue icon
Teacher: You mean the ladybug?
Reg's standard for this?
So do we start measuring the network speeds in how fast porn is transmitted, eg: FPS (Faps per second)
Or perhaps it is Giggidybits we should be measuring it in?
Change of meaning for the phrase
Extracting the urine - Will it come to mean that I am just in the process of charging my phone/car/other shiny gadget?
This song is going to be in my head all day now!
And I haven't even listened to it. Strange that i have not picked up that game in many many years, but I can still recall that music with crystal clarity. Every little pitch change and warble coming through those tinny little speakers.
And I know this is going to be my mental soundtrack to today and possibly the weekend, I don't mind it one little bit.
In fact I think the first thing I am going to do when I get home tonight is go dig through my old boxes for my gameboy! Which to my knowledge, still has the Tetris cartridge in it.
Opps, too late. I'm humming it to myself already.
I for one welcome our 2 dimensional, block dropping overlords.
Re: All those steps required?
I was wondering the exact same thing. If anyone does happen to fall for this they have zero sympathy from me as they effectively did it to themselves!
Re: Pfff. Please
She left me the characters, but took all the epic/legendary gear. More brutal than a Pre-Nerfed C’Thun.
Doom didn't want to make me go grab a shotgun and gibbing people who looked funny. GTA1 didn't make me want to go run over people (though it did make me shout out "GOURANGA" in my head when I saw a hare christina), Carmagedon didn't make me want to go run over cows with a car, C&C (the NOD disk) didn't make me want to go form a evil plot to take over the world.
Burnout didn't make me want to go take down all the other cars on the road (though I do drive a tad bit faster if I get behind the wheel immediately after playing that), or jump some ramps and smash through a billboard
In fact the only game that I can recall ever really make my blood boil was World of Warcraft, which has absolutely no basis in reality. And that was usually only when we wiped on a Raid due to someone not doing their appointed role... and another time when my missus, after telling me to come to bed several times, switched off the power at the fusebox.
But it is a moot point now as I don't play WoW any more.
3D printing inception
How long before we are using 3D printers to make 3D pens to make a 3D printer?
They are the ones making it racist
By highlighting the fact that there is a difference in the colour of these "things" and saying it is a problem they are in fact making it racist. As people have previously said, the emothingies are what the average 8-13 year old would think up and use. However, most normal kids (ie: ones not raised to care about skin colour and instead to judge people on their character) would not see this as a problem.
By calling it out and saying how it is racist not to have these other colours they are in fact tainting any youths who don't even see this as an issue.
Won't someone think of the children!?!
Does that mean
That chocolate chip cookies are medicinal?
Is this really even a real test?
Surely the more important question would be, which device cover works the best at protecting your shiny gadget as most people in the know would never use said device without one.
I have a Samsung S3 with a Poetic cover and as of yet I still have been unable to damage it, despite dropping the phone many times onto hard floor, sometimes corner first, sometimes flat on the screen. Even when the drop has been enough to dislodge the phone from case the phone still comes away without a scratch... so far.
Although the reason I guess for them not doing a cover test is that one would be able to argue for lower insurance premiums if they had the top rated case by them on said device.
Re: Blowhard It's all good
"but if you really think that weed in the long term will have no effect then you're definitely smoking something."
True. But I would sooner hang out with those casual smokers then the hypocritical pissheads that claim "They would never touch drugs and thinks anyone who does is a dirty hippy" as they light up their umpteenth fag of the day.
Re: Ummm.... oookkaaayy
>Ugh? It was very easy before- the old Mac Pro was renowned for it. Now it is just a case of swapping a cable.
In other words when it breaks or you want to upgrade you have to buy a new one. I'm sorry, but if I have just gone and shelled out over 2 grand for a machine I don't want to go have to buy a new one if it breaks (and I know you say, just buy applecare, but with that price tag there are going to be those that cannot afford the new shiny and the applecare)
Kind of looks like a trash can
Ok. It's a cylinder. Interesting, but practical... I don't know so much.
The pricetag and the location of the ports means that owners of this will put it right up front of their desks in a place of pride, meaning that all the other stuff has to be up on the desk too instead of tucked away neatly.
So for an editor that has a few hard disks, possibly some sort of video input device you are looking at at least half a dozen wires up on the desk. So is this what it is going back to ... the rats nest of wires on the desk??
Yes it looks good, and it is undoubtedly good hardware in the box. But all they are doing is making a bespoke form factor that makes upgrading even more impossible then before.
I can see it now
Get some dirt/eyelash in your eye and by the time you got it out you have taken 52 pictures and brought 6 random things.
Whats next, adjust your glasses by pushing the frame in the middle to factory reset the glasses?
Yea, I can totally see the Empire being Apple
I mean just look at the Death star, looks lovely, lots of nice round corners. But you drop something in the wrong place, in the case of the Death star 2 Photon torpedo's into an impractically placed exhaust port (which kinda screams Apple), then the whole thing cracks up!
Stop touching me Elmo
So wrong yet so funny
Also, Imaginationland is one of the best multipart episodes going. The bit with Kurt Russell and the Christmas Critters... cracks me up every time.
You MOM so heavy that even a 440-Newton rocket failed to break her free of earths orbit!
Re: Serve them right
Your doing it wrong!
Though it is understandable as you say you have had the iPhone before the Samsung and probably don't realise that there is a lot of customization you can do to get the most out of your android, unlike iPhones.
And I am guessing that because you are an iUser, you think you are smarter then the average user and therefore you have done everything you can and it's still rubbish, therefore lets bash the droid and continue using my fruity phone.
Seriously. The phone is fine in even the brightest of outdoor scenorio's. And yes, if you do things like leaving the Wifi permanently on instead of switching it off when the phone sleeps, leave the brightness up on full, use the base applications that drain the battery etc.. etc.. then it probably will be rubbish. But if you are clever about it then the SIII is a great phone. Don't go mocking something because of your own ignorance!
I get a full days use out of my battery and thats with fairly heavy usage of it during the day (watching vids, internet, e-mail, vpn and RDP) . Some days it doesn't even get close to low battery.
So please. Go donate your Samsung to someone who deserves such a nice bit of kit and go back to playing with your crApple.
I think a new definition is in order
Twerk - (Adjective). Is a combination of a Tw*t and a Jerk. Refers to someone who uses this word with a straight face in anything but the above descriptive fashion.
Only stupid/careless people get malware on their droids. I have had an Android since the Galaxy 1 and I have never had a malware or virus. It's a little thing called being aware. If a "free" app looks to good to be true then guess what... it probably is.
This however is nothing new, for as long as there are sites offering cracked software/apps to people for free, there will be people injecting nasties into said "free software".
I know it was said that Play store apps were ok but even those get treated with suspicion by me if the permissions are unrealistic. In my mind a lot of games and apps should need very little to no permissions to my phone and as such many of the "free" games and apps get passed over for this very reason.
Use a bit of common sense people and you will be fine..... oh wait... it's not that common anymore is it.
Lets try that again.
Use a bit of uncommon sense people and you will be fine.
I imagine the next phase would be to have an array of satellites around the globe with loads of these puppies in them, ready to load them into a droppod and fire it to whatever location on earth that needs "cleansing".
Things really are becoming a bit silly over the pond these days. If it is not companies having a bitch fight in the courts then it is ridiculous stories like this.
It's a wonder the police have the time to catch or prosecute any real criminals.
Hell, I would wager that a bottle of coke and mentos has more "destructive power" then what she made.
People need to calm the heck down and be reasonable. When I was a kid we used to do things like this all the time without fear of being labeled a terrorist. Yes, times may have changed some, but just because there are bad people out there who want to blow things up it doesn't mean we have to jump out of a skins every time there is a loud bang... and then arrest the offending party for making the loud bang in the first place.
The one point I was say is that she is possibly a bit silly for doing this on school property. Do it off school property and then throw the bottle onto school property if you really must.
I'll get me coat, it's the one with the Anarchists cookbook V1 in the pocket.
Why are police not knocking on this guys door?
Surely posting that constitutes some sort of evidence in a murder case? Unless they don't count such things as worthy of police attention in Malaysia.
But agreed. Pretty f'ing sick bastards whoever watched that and "liked" it.
Sounds to me like someone is ramping up to sell "THE ONLY COMPLETE ANTI-VIRUS/MALWARE PACKAGE TO DETECT AND REMOVE THE MAGIC MALWARE!"
I think the only magic trick here is how we are all being fooled into believing this is actually real without any evidence.
Am I missing something here?
If she was really that pissed off with him playing too much xbox then why didn't she just go switch off the electricity to the house/flat? Or just pull the plug?
That is what my wife used to do when she was pissed off at me playing World of Warcraft instead of coming to bed with her. For the record though I stopped playing that years ago when I realised just how much time and money I had wasted on a game I didn't even actually own.
I suppose that is one way
To make sure people don't use personal electronic devices at work.
Heck, I would probably encourage it, just to watch their faces when they are in the middle of tweeting about their lunch or latest bowel movement and the magnet fires up
This assumes the person is contactable
So what if there is no e-mail account on record for said offender? Say I don't have an e-mail account with my ISP package and I never register one with them. Then their automated system has nothing to go from. Then lets say they decide to send the warnings by snail mail.
I turn around after they start suing and state that we have had a problem for years now where mail goes missing, so we never received the first 4 letters. If there is no way to confirm receipt of the warnings then how can they say I ever received them in the first place?
Just seems to me that this idea has a few holes in it before it has even started.
Great game that! I know thats what i voted for. And no, the pc version was 1 player only as far as I recall.
I just remember all the spinnoff's from lemmings. Lemmings Paintball, 3D Lemmings. I am still however waiting for the original to be ported to Android so that I can kill... err I mean save some lemmings on the way in to work. I did however find a working version of Star Control II for the droid the other day and am currently loving that!
I imagine that the Uni would technically be the owners of said iPads. So how long until they start demanding that the students offer up all their relevant passwords (e-mail, dropbox, apple ID) as they will be expected to support the students and their fondleslabs with the software they need on it.
And then subsequently, how long until the Uni uses picture/video evidence recorded on said Pad showing students taking illegals substances to suspend/expel them?
Or, if you prefer, how long until a Uni tech person gets done for taking copies of someones naked pictures off their pad or for installing software that lets them remotely view the iPads video (installed only on female students tabs natch).
Re: What's the alternative?
How about putting a computer in every dorm room? Or a laptop? Something they could actually use to write some school work with? Perhaps spend the money on improving the IT structure in the school (and no, fondleslabs do not count)
The problem with any technology is that it is prone to misuse. Yes, there may be all these great apps for learning and textbooks to read, but that is like saying that there are great educational shows for kids to watch on tv... but it doesn't mean they are going to watch them.
I have worked in IT in education before and unless it is done in some sort of structured way (ie. Today class we are going to sit in front of the computers and do this task, then we are going to watch this video and then you are going to watch me do something and repeat it. A very boring example I know, but you get the idea), then it is very prone to noneducational uses.
A perfect example I can offer was that we used to service the laptops in schools, this would from time to time include laptops that were on loan to pupils to take home for them to do their schoolwork. The amount of smut/games and other stuff I dare not mention was phenomenal. Even the teachers laptops were nowhere near as bad.
And the same will be in this case. When you take that structure away and say, oh, you have a fondleslab in your hand while I am trying to hold a lecture... you must be taking notes or learning in some other way, so that's ok, then it is counterproductive to learning.
I would be interested to see the average test scores of the pupils there pre and post the iFlood.
Re: What a waste of a morning
>Coming next, maybe: the effect of a hang-over on FPS scores?
See now, if you are going to do that then you have to be thorough. The effects of being slightly tipsy on your Scores, then being drunk.. then being absolutely blottoed, THEN the effects of a hangovers at all different levels. All the way from "ouch my head hurts" to "OMG I WANT TO DIE!!"
Maybe it's just me
But I always check the privileges of an app before I install and have passed up installing many bits of well rated software because I didn't agree with the privileges it was wanting (why a simple game wants access to my accounts, to check network status and change system settings I will never know).
But failing that Droidwall would hopefully stop anything that managed to slip through the net. So personally I don't see any droid users with half a brain falling for this.... oh wait, we were talking about the Yanks weren't we?
Re: Real Computer Economics
Now that is funny as I have had my computer at home for 5 years and I don't see any need to replace it any time soon. My 2nd computer is 8 years old. Neither have any problems with it.
At work we use computers that are minimum 2 year old refurbished HP's and we use them for a good few years. Some of the boxes get loaded with Linux if they are file servers and then the desktop ones get loaded with Windows.
Personally I prefer windows as it is what I am used to and what I know how to get the most out of. I know with tweaking I could get more out of my Linux but at home I like my old school games, so windows XP is sound for that.
In my opinion it is the people with more disposable income that have Mac's and are generally the more technically un-savvy of the lot. But just as I an am exception to the rule as I use both Linux and Windows and am technically competent you will have mac users that are very competent... but just personally I have seen more of the former then the latter when talking about Mac users.
I'll get me coat, it's the one with the windows PE disk and USB linux boot in the pocket.
I disagree Chad, any technician worth their salt will know that sure you may get some useful information from the customer to try troubleshoot the problem but you should ALWAYS assume that they are not telling you the full story. Whether it be the fact that they let their child/friend/neighbour who "knows about computers" have a crack at fixing it first and in fact made the problem worse, or if they are not telling you about all the dodgy websites they went on which resulted in them becoming more virus ridden then a cheap dockside prostitute.
So yes, while you are right, jumpers don't move themselves, but you don't know if someone did or didn't screw around in a pc when you repair it. And of course if someone tries to fix it and fails they are not going to admit it.
Credit where credit is due?
I see there is no mention of James T Russell. The actual person who first came up with the concept of the CD and created them in the first place.
I can just see it now
User: "The servers are running a bit slow today."
Tech: "Ahh, one of the drives must have sprung a leak,"
User: "Well can't you just fill it up again?"
Tech: "We would, but we used up all the spare helium doing funny impressions last week after the pub."
Farmhouse Granary Loaf/Bap
Now that's the way forward.
Nice succulent bacon on the inside, then some ketchup, melted butter, soft fresh bread and then something crunchy on the crust to keep it all interesting and add some flavour to the whole thing.
You know it makes sense!
Re: Google Translate says:
The only point I will agree with is that Samsung have copied products. But my reply to that is.... and? So what.
You don't think every other company out there have done the same? We are where we are today due to people taking an idea (either old or new), refining it, maybe putting a little twist on it, repackaging it and calling it their own.
Apple have done it, Samsung have done it, Microsoft have done it, heck, you would be more hard pushed to find a company that hasn't copied someone else.
If we didn't allow people to take something and refine it and make it better then we would stagnate in our technological progression.
Sure Sammy could have changed more, perhaps been a little more subtle, but this trial is a farce and we all know it.
And Samsung cheap? I don't know how big the silver spoon was you were born with, but the cost of a new Galaxy S3 is quite a lot to most people.
By your same logic then people only buy crApple because they are expensive and they know most people can't afford all the newest kit and therefore won't have them. Whereas they look all "kewl" and such sipping their Starbucks and playing on their new Macbook or iWhatever.
Roll up roll up
Yes sir, this new patented system will 100% guarantee to ensure you don't give in to temptations.
Step one is a large burly man walks alongside you wherever you go.
Step two is, if he see's your eyes straying onto things it shouldn't then he punchs you. If you continue to oggle at Bulgarian airbags and the like then he pops you in the other eye. Your eyes swell up and then you can't see anything! Problem solved!
Then when you cannot see anything the burly man helps you not walk into things.
Praise buddah, your soul will be saved!!
That will be £999.99 please.
And if you look at it from the other side
Canis Biz Media...
Wouldn't that just be cartoons and cooking shows?
So glad I stopped playing wow a long time ago
They obviously forgot to recast their firewall buffs!