* Posts by Alistair Dabbs

515 posts • joined 19 May 2009

Page:

BYOD is NOT the Next Biggest Thing™: Bring me Ye Olde Lappetoppe

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Evolution?

That's right. They call them viruses, fraud, spoofing, hacking, malware and so on but "they're just different names, not different things". Noah put just one male internet threat and one female internet threat on the Ark, and here we are.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: A disturbing amount of focus on masturbating

Don't talk wank.

7
1
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: One down, one to go

You mean where computers filled an entire room?

Sony will be forced to admit that their difference engine was hacked into by some kids armed with a fretsaw and a bag of nails.

8
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: One down, one to go

If this keeps up, perhaps we'll see a return to valves.

3
0

YOU. Your women are mine. Give them to me. I want to sell them

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: This is a problem of procedure

It's not up to YouTube to determine what is and isn't legal, any more than it's up to BT to determine which phone calls use swear words. YouTube evaluates copyright owners and provides the tools but then makes it very awkward for its own users to be heard in the face of unfair treatment. It would be nice if it could offer a better method for uploaders and copyright claimants to argue it out.

It would be even better if it stuck to its word about chucking companies that make serial frivolous claims off the system entirely.

9
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Tail chasing

On of the sillier stories I discovered during my research concerned a musician who uploaded one of this songs to YouTube, only to receive a complaint from a copyright company (not INgrooves) that he had stolen the song from someone else. He disputed the claim and this went back and forth for a while. Just as the musician was considering 'going legal', he discovered that the copyright company was actually working for his own record label. It had been hired to chase everyone who put their songs on YouTube, and simply did as it was asked, even chasing after the original creators.

27
0

‘Whatever happened to Vladimir Putin?’ and other crap New Year prophesies

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Thanks :-)

Your are buggering welcome.

1
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: 1977

Tell you what, persuade Barin and Vultan to help and we'll depose Ming forever.

4
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Hmm..

I'm afraid a grown-up beard won't do. Investment money only gets handed to beardies in their 20s.

3
0

Last year was utter rubbish. Thanks for being part of it!

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Come on the great South, we're rooting for you

I kind of hoped that Kim Jong Il's successor might do a Gorbachev and simply give up, but no. When KJ Un dies in 80 years' time, there may be another opportunity.

1
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: VATMOSS

This is probably not a major issue for international corporations. It is for small businesses.

2
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: VATMOSS????

Wasn't it the gloopy subterranean entity in Barbarella? Oh, that was Matmos.

3
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: VATMOSS

Then they should make non-internet companies gather multiple pieces of evidence of customer existence with every sale, and force them to keep it for 10 years. Perhaps force shops to demand a passport from customers before they are permitted to buy anything. What do you think?

4
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: VATMOSS

It's not really a problem about VAT registration or exemption, at least not for me. To give it some credit, HMRC has come up with a single-registration scheme to cover the entire European Union, and adjusting prices for the 70-odd tax rates is something that online retail systems can handle on their own once you've set yours up.

The big pain is the new requirement to collect three pieces of evidence from every customer to prove that they are purchasing your digital goods in the country they claim to be in at the moment of purchase, AND that I must maintain these intrusive personal records about complete strangers in an auditable format for 10 years. Having been forced to collect all this unwanted data, I am then personally responsible for its security - again for 10 years.

When I sell you an eBook, all I want is your money. Now, though, I'll also need your inside leg measurements, DNA records and the deeds of your house - which I'll keep on a USB stick in my back pocket.

6
0

You have a 'SIMPLE QUESTION'? Well, the answer is NO

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Coming out party

Apple Store on the web doesn't offer a one-hour delivery service, nor any discounts for purchasing online. The nearest physical Apple Store, on the other hand, is a 20-minute stroll away from my front door and I don't have to guess at which of the 14 billion adapters to buy based on ambiguous one-sentence descriptions and tiny generic photos of white bits of plastic on white backgrounds.

10
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Exactly. Glad to know that someone's reading.

10
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Apple doesn't change connectors often. That is not the problem.

Already I see you need an adapter to change "Dobbs" into "Dabbs".

37
0

Real Ale TWATS: In SPAAAACE, no one can churn your cream

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: says:

I for one have been a regular customer of the various toilets at Westminster Palace in recent years. Those near the Lobby and event dining areas were refurbished a couple of years ago. They have Air Blades to dry your hands, which is nice.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Stuff the beer!

We have gone vegetarian at home but I thought a small piece of pork pie would be OK. Then I thought I might try one of each *type* (there were several), then soon lost count of how many wedges of pork pie I managed to stuff into my face over the course of the evening.

4
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Some random observations

All Reg readers *were* invited - via a public post right here on the site. I didn't get a special heads-up about the event. I read it here and paid my £10 like everyone else who attended.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Nomenclature

I have used a shovel as a spade with some success. Although it is quite difficult, it works OK if the earth is soft. I wouldn't bother using a spade in place of a shovel because it would be hopeless: it would be quicker using your hands.

4
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Headline

If anyone can explain the references to cream churning and cigarettes in the headline, please let me know.

2
0

A nation of CODERS? Yes, says UK.gov, and have some cash to do it

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

And the student loan?

The bursary is nice but do they still have to pay for their tuition fees?

1
0

How HAPPY am I on a scale of 1 to 10? Where do I click PISSED OFF?

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Really?

I can't seem to find a train from London to Amsterdam. Perhaps they're booked up.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Reflexology with a happy ending?

No, it's like goldy or bronzey but made of iron. © Baldrick

1
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Reflexology with a happy ending?

>> Why was El Reg pushing a pop-up survey in my face

We like irony.

5
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: How to deal with airport "security"

Yup, it worked for Edward Fox in Day of the Jackal.

11
0

Go festive this year with Christmas carols, baby Jesus and CLITORAL STIMULATORS

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: NTNOCN FTW...

Well done, Jambo. I was thinking about this precise sketch while writing those words. I used to own the LP.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: As you're a journalist I'm surprised your first port of call wasn't Wikipedia

That doesn't make sense. Journalists are not allowed to use Wikipedia, unless they can come up with the same information on at least two correlating sites that themselves haven't just been copied off Wikipedia too. In fact, if it's on Wikipedia, the information is immediately suspect.

2
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

desperate people

It has nothing to do with poverty. Genuinely poor and homeless people will queue at a soup trailer and await their turn for food parcels. But it's not greed, either. It's that they've been fooled into thinking consumerism is an end in itself. They all own TVs already but the dual thought that (1) they can buy a new TV at a discount and (2) there is a limited number of these discounted TVs sends the consumerist into an acquisition frenzy. Even if they are lucky and get one of the bargain TVs, they'll soon find it's an old or unpopular stock-clearance model and will be lucky to get their money back even by selling it on eBay.

5
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Durex TV ad

The 'dual screen' Duex TV ad is on YouTube here: http://youtu.be/yWu3Z30LEjM

1
2
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Black Friday

So what's Blue Monday?

5
0

Syrian Electronic Army in news site 'hack' POP-UP MAYHEM

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Al Jazeera Hackathon

http://canvas.aljazeera.com

I think we already have a winner.

0
0

ASA raps 'F*CK YOU GOOGLE' vlogger + chums over VIDEO LICKFEST

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Keyword repetition as a form of advertising

Does this mean LittleKuriboh has been selling vaginas?

0
0

I need a password to BRAKE? What? No! STOP! Aaaargh!

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: You're kidding, right?

Cars only have two components that matter: comfy seats and a good hifi. I know I'm bizarre but a metal bracket in the door handle that allegedly breaks after a few years does not even make my top ten.

1
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Stereotypes

>> I'm sure Mr Dabbs could write a whole book on French driving attitude

What strikes me most of all about French motorists is the lack of any awareness of the concept and purpose of maintaining the flow of traffic. No-one under any circumstances whatsoever will ever "let you in" or flash their headlights to allow you to go first, even if doing so would ultimately speed up everyone's journey including their own.

2
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Re. Voice control

No doubt you've all seen this: two Scotsmen in a voice-activated lift... http://youtu.be/sAz_UvnUeuU

3
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Misattribution

Normal byline service has been resumed. Thank you.

0
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: windscreen wipers?

>> Why even have windows?

The first London Underground trains didn't have window panes for this reason. It was felt that since there was nothing to look at while passengers were in a tunnel, and given that in those days there were guards and porters to help people on and off at each station, windows were unnecessary. Go to the London Transport Museum and sit in one: it's like being locked inside a communal wooden coffin. Nor do you experience any relief when arriving at a station. Passengers hated it.

11
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Negative view on Sat nav

In the UK, Garmin sells a one-off Lifetime Update so you don't have to buy a subscription, although it's limited to the device you buy it for.

2
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Sorry

Unfortunately, having driven his SUV into the field, he's probably blaming *you* for the incident.

6
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Agree about BMW drivers.

Wow, is Subaru a real car? I thought they only existed in WRC.

2
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Which word was that?

1
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Stereotypes

All French drivers *are* bad, except for my wife and brother-in-law.

7
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Sorry

I've driven plenty of Citroens, from the classic DS to the iconic 2CV to the modern C models and Picasso. Comfy cars but the dashboard layout was designed by a lunatic.

8
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Yep

I don't know who Kelly Fiveash is but she's a damn fine writer.

4
0
Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Had a drive home from hell? Grab a glass of your favourite and listen to this:

The next time someone posts a link to some Country and Western music, could they please mark it up as Not Suitable For Ears? Thanks.

23
0

It’s PAYBACK time as HUMANS send a PROBE up ALIEN body

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: Catford calling...

Bromley replying: already here, pal.

1
0

The Pirate Bay co-founder exits jail, now, er, free to eat vegan food

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Jailbird politicians

I'm impressed that these pirates chose to do their time behind bars before going into politics. Normally, politicians do it the other way around.

5
0

Got a STRAP-ON? Remember to TAKE IT OFF at WORK

Alistair Dabbs
Silver badge

Re: I've said it before

You'd think so but product acceptance doesn't work that way. Lots of good new ideas struggle because consumers are worried that (1) they are a short-term fad that won't be supported for long, (2) buyers will look stupid for buying something no-one else has, and (3) lack of competition keeps them expensive. Back in the 80s it was understood that there was no market for men's magazines, and in the 90s Oki bust a gut trying to interest anyone in multi-function printer/scanners.

1
0

Page:

Forums